Corrupt a wish.

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Postby Moral Minority on Wed Apr 09, 2008 3:33 am

Granted. The zombies eat your penis.

I wish for a quiet, normal life.
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Postby lordpunkmonk on Wed Apr 09, 2008 6:40 am

granted you are now deaf and dumb

I wish for a grapefruit
--LPM lord of the apocalypse
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Wish

Postby black bart on Wed Apr 09, 2008 8:49 am

Granted...you now have grapefruit sized testicles.

I wish for an hour with Kylie Minogue.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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Postby ken worley on Wed Apr 09, 2008 9:15 am

Granted.

However, the hour is spent with her asking you questions about me, and whether or not I've mentioned her in any of my recent posts.



I wish jerry the springer would be set upon and torn to pieces by angry show-guests.(And that the members of his studio audience, as he tries to run to them for shelter, get the scent of his blood, and true to their nature, join in the killing frenzy instead of helping him.)
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Screw

Postby black bart on Wed Apr 09, 2008 10:11 am

Granted, but you are the main guest on the show and although you eventually get to share in the carnage, you spend a whole live half hour in the chair listening to your long forgotten X girlfriend tell the world about your sexual depravity, including the threesomes involving MM.

I wish for a 'Slow Comfortable Screw Against the Wall'.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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Postby farfalla on Wed Apr 09, 2008 12:05 pm

granted, but the gin it was made with was tainted with an hallucinogen which drove you to chew off your tongue and gouge out your eyes

I wish my friend's post radiation PET scan for cancer would come back negative
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Postby Moral Minority on Wed Apr 09, 2008 12:52 pm

Granted. They are so overjoyed, they snap their own neck.

I wish my girlfriend was Japanese.
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Postby farfalla on Wed Apr 09, 2008 1:05 pm

granted - Japanese sumo wrestler who, during a night os passionate play, accidentally smothers you

I wish it would snow no more where I live until December 24th
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Postby Moral Minority on Wed Apr 09, 2008 1:06 pm

Granted. There is no snow due to global warming. I mean... there is no snow. Ever...

You should have arghhhed moar.

I wish for n00bs to lurk moar before posting.
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Postby farfalla on Wed Apr 09, 2008 1:14 pm

you do?? - oh well, granted - the lurking n00bs spend their lurking time hunting you down and following you to school where they make stupid fsm references until they finally post here and fsm forgivees them, but they are insulted by pastafarians who shall remain nameless (you know who you are)

I wish I could go to New Zealand

.
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Postby Moral Minority on Wed Apr 09, 2008 1:23 pm

Granted. Unfortunately, the gov't of New Zealand gets taken over by sheep and now the entire country has compulsory shearing.

That includes your hair.

I wish I were a Vulcan.
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Postby Detective TurtleHolmes on Wed Apr 09, 2008 7:45 pm

Granted. Unfortunately, you turn into a pile of poo whenever the word is mentioned.

Hmm.

I wish I could be more cynical.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.

So yeah, I went and got a blog.
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Postby ~NoodleDemon~ on Thu Apr 10, 2008 12:49 am

Granted. You are now kw's second account.

I wish that there was more to life than sex.
I hope you're on the recieving end of an improbability equation wherein something happens to you that's as unlikely as Rob Schneider winning a best actor Oscar on the same day Michael Jackson single handedly captures Osama Bin Laden. ~ Rainswept

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Postby Detective TurtleHolmes on Thu Apr 10, 2008 2:06 am

Granted. There is now...
er...
umm...
errrrrr....... Darn.

I wish there was more mustard in the world.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.

So yeah, I went and got a blog.
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Postby Moral Minority on Thu Apr 10, 2008 4:19 am

Granted. Your crap is now mustard and you are forced into slavery so you would produce mustard for the world.

I wish I could be Japanese.
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