On Touching

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On Touching

Postby Flying Jib on Thu Feb 21, 2008 1:34 pm

With his noodly appendage, the Flying Spaghetti Monster will touch all and only those beings who do not touch themselves.

Think about it! :twisted:

Think Bertrand. Think paradox. Think about monkeys and cheetos.
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Postby EarthRise on Thu Feb 21, 2008 2:42 pm

No, I'm pretty sure the FSM is down with masturbation.
[...] the difficulty of believing that a perfect and complex eye could be formed by natural selection, though insuperable by our imagination, should not be considered as subversive of the theory.
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Postby Rainswept on Thu Feb 21, 2008 2:52 pm

Otherwise there would be hooker factories in heaven instead of stripper factories.
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Postby Almighty Doer of Stuff on Sat Feb 23, 2008 11:51 pm

Uh... I thought I posted in this thread after Earthrise and before Rainswept. WTF?

I believe I said something along the lines of "Arrgh, we're not allowed to masturbate, but Heaven has a Stripper Factory? Methinks that be somethin' other than oregano in yer pasta sauce!"
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Postby ~NoodleDemon~ on Sun Feb 24, 2008 1:16 am

Hooker factory, stripper factory, what's the difference?

:wink:

Seriously, though, strippers are multi-purpose...

I think I'll stop being utterly disgusting and boorish now.

I also think I'll finally go to sleep now...
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Postby Moral Minority on Sun Feb 24, 2008 10:32 am

Whatever. I am not into strippers as much.
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Postby Lord of Numa on Sun Feb 24, 2008 3:53 pm

Yeah, His Noodly Goodness is definitely down with the self-lovin'

He feels for the lonely :wink:
May the glorious Flying Spaghetti Monster bathe you in his wondrous Mercy, Love, and Garlic Sauce!
May He bless MP3 Fiesta and their noodlicious music bargains!
May He also watch over Roffleopolis and touch it with his marvelous Noodly Appendages.

RAmen
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Postby ~NoodleDemon~ on Sat Mar 22, 2008 11:51 pm

*poke*
I hope you're on the recieving end of an improbability equation wherein something happens to you that's as unlikely as Rob Schneider winning a best actor Oscar on the same day Michael Jackson single handedly captures Osama Bin Laden. ~ Rainswept

O.K. Everything else is just stuff you do while you are waiting to have sex. Sin. WoE. ~ Warlord of Elephants

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Postby Rainswept on Sun Mar 23, 2008 1:03 am

In Soviet Russia, threads poke YOU.
I believe it's time for mankind to set aside the crutch of religion and embrace morality born of reason and truth. Those crutches have long since proven treacherous when the ground gets slippery.
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Postby farfalla on Sun Mar 23, 2008 11:56 am

with a subject called "touching" this is the best we can do?

I am touched that some think I am touched for touching.
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Postby Moral Minority on Sun Mar 23, 2008 12:30 pm

In Soviet Russia, thread bumps you.
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Postby farfalla on Sun Mar 23, 2008 12:56 pm

some of the best touches are 'bumps'
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Postby Moral Minority on Sun Mar 23, 2008 12:57 pm

Some of the best touches were done by other people.
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Postby Rainswept on Sun Mar 23, 2008 12:59 pm

This thread is well.... touching.
I believe it's time for mankind to set aside the crutch of religion and embrace morality born of reason and truth. Those crutches have long since proven treacherous when the ground gets slippery.
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Postby Moral Minority on Sun Mar 23, 2008 1:02 pm

In Soviet Russia, penis is touching you.
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