I can top that....

This board is NOT restricted access. Keep that in mind when you post.

Moderator: Other Stuff Mods

Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Wed Dec 03, 2008 11:40 am

I can satisfy two anthropology students at once (don't even try to beat this feat, it involves an awful lot of digging and swallowing).
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: I can top that....

Postby Rev. Rowan Redbeard on Wed Dec 03, 2008 3:45 pm

I've satisfied a woman 7 times in under an hour.
—Captain the Reverend Lord C.S. Rowan, Lord of Glencoe, Minister of Pastafarianism, Gentleman Pirate

By reading this post, you agree that you are solely responsible for your reaction to it.
The poster takes no responsibility for any offense taken where none was meant.
User avatar
Rev. Rowan Redbeard
Prophet of Pastafarianism
 
Posts: 18334
Joined: Thu Jul 26, 2007 10:49 am
Location: Southern Oregon

Re: I can top that....

Postby Roy Hunter on Wed Dec 03, 2008 4:13 pm

Rev. Rowan Redbeard wrote:I've satisfied a woman 7 times in under an hour.

You only thought it was a woman. Believe me, I know...
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.
User avatar
Roy Hunter
If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
 
Posts: 15552
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.

Re: I can top that....

Postby ken worley on Wed Dec 03, 2008 4:37 pm

Rev. Rowan Redbeard wrote:I've satisfied a woman 7 times in under an hour.


He gave her all six of his credit cards and paid for dinner without demanding sex.


(I've actually met her, she's a doll.)
Image
User avatar
ken worley
King of the Pervs
 
Posts: 3363
Joined: Sun Dec 17, 2006 11:10 pm
Location: Fortress of Squalitude

Re: I can top that....

Postby Detective TurtleHolmes on Thu Dec 04, 2008 4:13 am

I satisfied fourteen women in under a minute, and I don't even own a credit card.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.

So yeah, I went and got a blog.
User avatar
Detective TurtleHolmes
Clouseau's Protege
 
Posts: 9266
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 6:34 am
Location: Francemouth

Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Thu Dec 04, 2008 8:40 am

Was it your mother, 3 aunties and 10 sisters? You cooked them all Fish Head Stew?

Actually I lied, I've never even met an anthropology student :cry: or even a student come to think of it :cry:

But if I ever do meet an anthropology student I'll know exactly how to please them...much more than anyone else on this here thread.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: I can top that....

Postby Edd on Thu Dec 04, 2008 2:33 pm

Detective TurtleHolmes wrote:I satisfied fourteen women in under a minute, and I don't even own a credit card.

With this particular skill, speed is usually not looked for.

I, on the other hand, have satisfied one woman, in one night, so well she's still smiling.
"Oook." - The Librarian

Visit the new and improved Agnoistrology.com!
User avatar
Edd
Mystic of Meatball
 
Posts: 2505
Joined: Mon Jun 09, 2008 11:02 pm
Location: Texas

Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Fri Dec 05, 2008 11:04 am

Edd wrote:
Detective TurtleHolmes wrote:I satisfied fourteen women in under a minute, and I don't even own a credit card.

With this particular skill, speed is usually not looked for.

I, on the other hand, have satisfied one woman, in one night, so well she's still smiling.


You can keep her:

Image
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: I can top that....

Postby Zankou 2.0 on Fri Dec 05, 2008 3:51 pm

I see what you did thar.
--Zankou II

The thin line between genius and insanity is less of a border than a union.

"Science can purify religion from error and superstition; religion can purify science from idolatry and false absolutes. Each can draw the other into a wider world, a world in which both can flourish."
--Pope John Paul II


Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
-Albert Einstein
User avatar
Zankou 2.0
Purveyor of Triviality
 
Posts: 9549
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2007 6:14 pm
Location: Ontario, Canada

Re: I can top that....

Postby Detective TurtleHolmes on Sat Dec 06, 2008 6:33 am

Edd wrote:
Detective TurtleHolmes wrote:I satisfied fourteen women in under a minute, and I don't even own a credit card.

With this particular skill, speed is usually not looked for.

I, on the other hand, have satisfied one woman, in one night, so well she's still smiling.

Oh, did I forget to mention? They were so satiated they could not possibly have had any more of me without turning into moosh.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.

So yeah, I went and got a blog.
User avatar
Detective TurtleHolmes
Clouseau's Protege
 
Posts: 9266
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 6:34 am
Location: Francemouth

Re: I can top that....

Postby Rev. Rowan Redbeard on Sat Dec 06, 2008 7:02 am

Here's the topper. My boast was true.
—Captain the Reverend Lord C.S. Rowan, Lord of Glencoe, Minister of Pastafarianism, Gentleman Pirate

By reading this post, you agree that you are solely responsible for your reaction to it.
The poster takes no responsibility for any offense taken where none was meant.
User avatar
Rev. Rowan Redbeard
Prophet of Pastafarianism
 
Posts: 18334
Joined: Thu Jul 26, 2007 10:49 am
Location: Southern Oregon

Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Sat Dec 06, 2008 3:08 pm

Rev. Rowan Redbeard wrote:Here's the topper. My boast was true.


Blimey...7 cups of tea in a an hour! Good brewing matey.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: I can top that....

Postby Pirate Johnson on Mon Dec 08, 2008 9:35 am

Is that why your mother was smiling when I got up. That was pretty good. I smiled, too. I'm proud of you son.
Image
In brightest day
In darkest night
No ninjas shall escape my sight
Let those who warrrship evil Unicorn's might
beware my power
Green Cannon's fire


About the colors I post in see: http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/rgb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCMzjJjuxQI&playnext=10&playnext_from=QL

YES. I AM PirateJohnson on Ebay.

R.I.P.George Carlin (my hero)
User avatar
Pirate Johnson
Agnolini Admiral
 
Posts: 833
Joined: Tue Oct 14, 2008 2:58 am

Re: I can top that....

Postby farfalla on Mon Dec 08, 2008 10:06 pm

Rev. Rowan Redbeard wrote:I've satisfied a woman 7 times in under an hour.



me too :wink:
~~~~~~/\~~~~~~

The heart has its reason, of which reason knows nothing. -Pascal - thanks, Z

"The only rules that really matter are these: what a man can do and what a man can't do."
Cpt Jack Sparrow

"I'm used to going out at 3 in the morning and doing something stupid."
Alan Moore

Silk 'n mind
User avatar
farfalla
Feline Fatale
 
Posts: 10467
Joined: Fri Apr 20, 2007 1:13 am
Location: by the waterfall

Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Tue Dec 09, 2008 5:23 am

farfalla wrote:
Rev. Rowan Redbeard wrote:I've satisfied a woman 7 times in under an hour.



me too :wink:


You're supposed to go one better... :wink: (just the thought has satisfied me so consider yourself a topper) :D
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

PreviousNext

Return to Games, Fun, and Jokes

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 8 guests

cron