Secret Handshake

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Secret Handshake

Postby richardchaven on Wed Aug 31, 2005 11:47 pm

I have been trying to work out a subtle (?) hand
signal that Pastafarians can flash to each other. The
best I have come up with is the first and third
fingers curled tightly (the meatballs), the second
finger curled (for obvious reasons) but a little
forward of the 1st and 3rd, and the pinky and thumb
curled diaganally forward (as noodles).

It hurts like hell (I cannot even come close to a
Vulcan salute), and people were looking at me
strangely in the restaurant where I was ... developing
it. Ah well, I'm prepared for a little persecution.

Whadda think?
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Postby devodave on Thu Sep 01, 2005 12:38 am

Genius!
I salute thee!
<writhes in pain as hand performs the salute>
Subtlety be damned, let's show we're willing to suffer for our faith!
"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards." -Mark Twain
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A better one

Postby unixrat on Fri Sep 02, 2005 3:44 pm

A better secret handshake would be a normal handshake with all your fingers wiggling, symbolizing The Glorious Touch Of His Noodly Appendages.
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Postby richardchaven on Sat Sep 03, 2005 2:01 am

And how does that honor the meatballs?

That handshake could be for a soba god, or an octopus god.

All Praise the Flying SPAGETTI Monster
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Postby unixrat on Sat Sep 03, 2005 8:51 am

Brother richardchaven, thou dost try too hard. A league of worshippers, crippled from the secret meatball shake, is not what the Almighty FSM wishes. However, if you really want to honor the meatballs, consider adding a 'crotch grab' to it.

So, handshake...
First part: 'Normal' right-hand handshake with wiggling fingers (symbolizing The Divine Touch).
Seconde part: While doing the first, truly righteous worshippers use their left hand to grab their own groin, symbolizing the holy meatballs.

I had to emphasize the symbolic aspect of it, so as not to exclude those of a female persuasion.

This may violate your 'subtle' wish a little, so perhaps the Holy Meatball aspect can be reserved for houses of worship.
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Postby unixrat on Sat Sep 03, 2005 8:54 am

I can also see that there is a competing Handshake of Noodles in another thread.

Perhaps we need some divine intervention.
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Postby richardchaven on Sat Sep 03, 2005 11:08 am

"...grab their own groin..."

Rather sexist, no? <G> The FSM is beyond petty human gender. We use the masculin pronoun because we are unable to comprehend the true being that is FSM.

On other words: meatballs <> boy balls

Yours in Pasta
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Postby toasterhead on Sat Sep 03, 2005 11:13 am

richardchaven wrote:"...grab their own groin..."

Rather sexist, no? <G> The FSM is beyond petty human gender. We use the masculin pronoun because we are unable to comprehend the true being that is FSM.

On other words: meatballs <> boy balls

Yours in Pasta
Women have groins too, last time I checked...


Granted, that was a long time ago... :(
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Postby VeryGnawty on Sat Sep 03, 2005 11:26 am

That handshake sounds complicated.

As an alternative, could we use the "reverse butt kiss"
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Postby Stex on Sun Sep 04, 2005 9:41 am

Honering the meatballs is indeed a tricky challange. Maybe folding the thumb and 5th finger in to form 2 balls and then use the remaining middle 3 fingers for "noodling" the other pastafarian. It's the best i can come up with
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Postby Lynne on Sun Sep 04, 2005 10:25 am

Sorry, y'all, but I haven't been able to respond till now because I have been incapacitated, lying on the floor convulsed in hysterical laughter at the mental image of these various handshakes. :fsm_smile: Were we to engage in such "secret" salutations they wouldn't be secret for very long, I am telling you.

I suppose if I had to endure the pain involved in some of these, well, there are many things I might do for my Lard and Savioretta, Her Most Divine Noodliness; however, getting carted off to jail for doing a Michael Jackson in a public (nay, pubic) place does not seem a good way to convert followers.

On the third or fourth hand, I suppose the early Christian martyrs went to much greater lengths to attract a following, but then I suppose that might be why I am not a Christian.

:worship:
Blessed be, ye wenches and mateys.
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handshake with both hands at the same time

Postby Noodlyoodly on Tue Sep 06, 2005 3:39 pm

I am laughing so hard that I can barely type.

I propose a handshake *with both hands at the same time* starting with a circle made by the thumb and forefinger to symbolize the Holy Meatball, while at the same time waving/twining the third, fourth, and fifth fingers to symbolize the Noodly Appendages. (People might think you were signing/using Sign Language, but that is simply another instance of the Great FSM showing His/Her omnipresence! Now we know how Sign Language was inspired!) :lol:
The pasta is the life.

In Pastalidarity, NOOOD
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Postby Follower on Tue Sep 06, 2005 4:34 pm

I like the sound of that one. I think that the holy FSM would approve.
It will come again in glory to judge the pasta and the rice.
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