Wedgie Document

Submit your scriptural writings for inclusion in the Loose Canon, and your tales of ancient FSM Lore, as well as any other FSM-related writing you may have.

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Postby anon1mat0 on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:03 am

A major public debate between FSM theorists and Darwinists

Why darwinists and not IDers? I'd pay to give a wedgie to a IDer any day.
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Darren, where did you get that girl wedgie site? It is .... definitively FSM! :mrgreen:
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Postby FireFox on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:06 am

# One hundred scientific, academic and technical articles peer reviewed by ourselves

I would propose that the spread of these documents includes:
the obvious design of the human body to accept pasta, and pasta like foods, as a easy source of fuel. this could be expanded to include high performance athletics, weight management and everyday conviance
the convergency of modern thoeries of physics with FSM
the physical construction and properties of pasta (both cooked and uncooked), also the binding properties of various sauces and additivies
various health enhancing properties of additives to pasta

S
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Postby Long Gone McGruff on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:12 am

anon1mat0:

We had a good post from a Christian recently explaining his ideas about looking for the meaning in biblical stories rather than taking them literally. The "meaning" in the Wedge is pure acid to real science. So far - and it's just an idea - I've been trying to pick up their ball and run with it a little further, with an FSM flavour.

And I think it's disgusting that the state should unfairly support science at the expence of other belief systems ;)
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Postby teripie on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:16 am

anon1mat0 wrote:
A major public debate between FSM theorists and Darwinists

Why darwinists and not IDers? I'd pay to give a wedgie to a IDer any day.
---
Darren, where did you get that girl wedgie site? It is .... definitively FSM! :mrgreen:


We are ID's. That's why we are here. We want our ID, which is the one true ID, to be the ID that is taught from sea to shining sea. The Darwin and scientific theories are the false beliefs.
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Postby anon1mat0 on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:23 am

Then let the false ID deal with Darwin while we deal with them :wink: :twisted: :mrgreen:
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Postby Griffin on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:25 am

Raise funds to ship (pirate ships) all Scientists to the Isle of Wight. Or some other island.
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Postby teripie on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:31 am

Griffin wrote:Raise funds to ship (pirate ships) all Scientists to the Isle of Wight. Or some other island.


Yes! We have to raise money (or at least look like we're raising money.) It's the main goal of most big time chruches isn't it? What about missionaries? Shouldn't we have some kind of out reach program outlined also?
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Postby Alpaca on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:35 am

Love the input so far.

I think we should avoid referring to "ID" at all. Our form of parody is not to assume the identity of the IDers and exaggerate their points. Rather, we create our own parallel, yet seperate, version of ID with the extended allegory of the FSM.

In the same way, to strengthen the argument, let's not refer directly to evolution or Darwinism. Let's attack science as a whole.

Also, with regard to the introduction, I'd really, really appreciate it if somebody could find some gigantic list of scientists, and put it here.

Would it be appropriate to add the names of a few atrocious people to our list ot "scientists," just to further exaggerate the science-is-evil mantra?

Long John McGruff wrote:"A part of our strategy should be to fight science with bad science. A superficially credible but utterly fallacious parody of the scientific method will serve our ends either (a) by discrediting science itself or (b) by replacing it with our own faith-based, pseudo-scientific dogma if nobody rumbles what we're up to."

By the way feel free to change anything to make it better.


I like the idea of this, but it's two blatant. Remember, the wedge document uses phrasing that, while shocking to the normal person, has nothing intrinsically insidious about it. That is to say, if an utterly impartial person who had no knowledge of the issue were to examine it, they'd find a perfectly valid strategy to promote a certain view. Nothing wrong with that, right?

Try to mirror that approach here.
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Postby Griffin on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:37 am

Maybe we could use the thermometer from the Million Noodle March.
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Postby Alpaca on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:41 am

Griffin wrote:Maybe we could use the thermometer from the Million Noodle March.


http://www.hohclan.com/thermometer.php

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Postby anon1mat0 on Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:44 am

Would it be appropriate to add the names of a few atrocious people to our list ot "scientists," just to further exaggerate the science-is-evil mantra?

Josef Mengele perhaps?
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The Million Noodle March (MNM) and the Wedgie Document (WD) are just small ideas for now, but if we grow couldn't the WD undermine a full fledged and openly FSM endorsed MNM?
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Postby Long Gone McGruff on Sat Dec 24, 2005 1:23 am

Alpaca wrote:Would it be appropriate to add the names of a few atrocious people to our list of "scientists," just to further exaggerate the science-is-evil mantra?


Could be. Can push this any way you want it. Although in the other Wedge, they name just a few scientists, naming all the greats (or at least a good sized chunk) is meant to be a sarcastic way to show that complaints about "materialistic" science are just plain ignorant. It's a reminder of the importance of science, of the immense amount of knowledge on which our culture is based - and they're trying to subvert it.

Anyway I really am off to bed now. Merry Xmas everyone when it comes :)
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Postby Alpaca on Sat Dec 24, 2005 1:34 am

anon1mat0 wrote:The Million Noodle March (MNM) and the Wedgie Document (WD) are just small ideas for now, but if we grow couldn't the WD undermine a full fledged and openly FSM endorsed MNM?


I think the two can manage to coexist, in the same way everything else coexists with the open letter. My ultimate goal, albeit lofty, is to write this document in the same vein as the open letter was written in. So, while we have a bunch of inane religious zealotry on this forum (which I fully endorse), I think we should stick to good, old-fashioned parody here.
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Postby Alpaca on Sat Dec 24, 2005 1:42 am

I've added a 20 year goals section.

FireFox wrote:# One hundred scientific, academic and technical articles peer reviewed by ourselves

I would propose that the spread of these documents includes:
the obvious design of the human body to accept pasta, and pasta like foods, as a easy source of fuel. this could be expanded to include high performance athletics, weight management and everyday conviance
the convergency of modern thoeries of physics with FSM
the physical construction and properties of pasta (both cooked and uncooked), also the binding properties of various sauces and additivies
various health enhancing properties of additives to pasta

S


Where would we put this? The goals section of the wedge document contains (ha-ha) materialistic goals only, i.e. numbers of articles, books, etc. Should this be integrated into the introductory paragraph?
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Postby MusMusculus on Sat Dec 24, 2005 2:21 am

Here is a list of some great scientists we could use.

for our PBS/Nova equivalent can we get a famous TV cook to do a pasta cooking marathon on the Food Network or something like that? and maybe we could get at least two universities, neither of which have the word Bob in their name to have FSM as their dominant view point.
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