ICONS OF THE FAITH

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ICONS OF THE FAITH

Postby Shoeman on Mon Oct 10, 2005 11:07 pm

Who are the Saints if any?

I'd like to nominate Captain Jack Sparrow of the movie Pirates of the Carribean. If there's ever an embodiment of Pastafarians, its him right there.
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Postby DaveL on Mon Oct 10, 2005 11:29 pm

From a Midget/Midgit perspective...

I vote Danny Devito and Vern Troyer (Mini-me) - as stated in the Book of Midgets/Midgits.
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Postby Solipsy on Tue Oct 11, 2005 1:33 am

Ahhhh, here we go with the Saints again. The Process of Cannonization in the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is covered thoroughly in the "Stuff Everyone Should Know" thread, but because I think the topic and resulting Official Proclamation are funny, I'll repost here (I highly recommend reading that section of the thread for a laugh):
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Know Ye All Present on This Thread that the Council of Olive Garden has issued another proclamation, for clarification purposes:

1.The Official Cannonization of Saints Shall be Reserved for Volunteers Only, While Such Volunteers Are Alive and True Believers among the Membership of The Holy Church of the FSM, Disregarding Gender, Sexual Preference, or Level of Writing Ability.

2. The Targeting of Saints Shall Be Determined At Such Time As the Proposed Volunteer Saint Is Presented for Cannonization, by Such Considerations as Aerodynamics of the Body and Appropriateness of the Target.

3. The Title of the Saint Shall Be Determined Through Deliberation of The Wise Council of Olive Garden.

Thus It Shall Be. Topic Decided.


(If they start issuing a lot of these, this galleyscribe gig could get old fast... Meetings, meetings, meetings... votes, votes, votes... blah, blah, blah... "yes your Lordship this, yes your Lordship that..." *sigh*)

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I believe, however, that how we are seeking to honor icons such as Jack Sparrow, a.k.a. the luscious Johnny Depp, is through BEATIFICATION. (rather than Cannonization, the rather messy process for becoming a Saint in the CotFSM, which involves first volunteering to be fired out of a cannon, and second, being dead.)

be·at·i·fy 1. To proclaim a person to be one of the blessed and thus worthy of public religious veneration in a particular region or religious congregation.
2. To exalt above all others.

FSMism has no problem, I should think, with nominating appropriate icons for Beatification. Nominate away. Let the debate ensue.
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Postby DaveL on Tue Oct 11, 2005 3:39 am

Awwww...

Cmon - he looks so freakin cute with that gun in his hand. Can we keep him, can we keep him pleeeeeeeze...

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Beatify me or else! :mrgreen:
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Postby Solipsy on Tue Oct 11, 2005 11:53 am

Those Held Beatified for the FSM Faithful
The list as it officially stands to date:

1. Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow (though the qualifying role may be dropped secondary to general overall desirability)
2. Vern Troyer for his extraordinary contributions to midgetness.

Danny Devito, while a gifted actor, is not a true midget and to my knowledge has never has played a pirate. Until evidence is produced to the contrary I vote Nay. Dissenters?

I Nominate Billy Barty, 1923-2000, because he was a midget with true staying power. The little booger would NOT go away. He may in fact have been descended from the first midgit/midget.
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Postby teripie on Tue Oct 11, 2005 7:27 pm

In the up comong sequel to Pirates of The Caribbean I hear Kieth Richards will play the part of Jack Sparrow's father. This performance, I suspect, may catapult him into PFM sainthood. Depp said his Sparrow performance was drawn some from Richards.
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Postby Shoeman on Tue Oct 11, 2005 9:19 pm

I've heard that too. Hmmm Keith Richards....

I think its more of a flashback sequence because they also mention Will's (Orlando Bloom) father.

There was this one movie about Captain Morgan where Morgan was played by a woman (pretty sure it was Captain Morgan). She seemed pretty kick ass. In one of the scenes she was talking dirty to a guy while reaching to her leg where her pistol was kept. Then she shot him under the table.

Or maybe she just threatened him. I dont' remember. I'll keep an eye out for that movie.
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Postby teripie on Tue Oct 11, 2005 9:43 pm

I've always admired Burt Lancaster in his role of The Crimson Pirate. I think this was the first pirate to truly touch me many years ago.
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Postby Shoeman on Tue Oct 11, 2005 10:26 pm

Could that be the first contact you had with His Noodlyness?
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Postby teripie on Tue Oct 11, 2005 10:40 pm

Hmmmm. I was initially gonna say "yes" but upon reflection I now remember the 1950's (?) TV show "Long John Silver." Us kids were crazy for it! Wish I could remember the British actor who played Silver. Robert somebody-or-other. Dang! I can see his face and hear in voice in my feeble old min. Guess it's Google time.
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Bunny, as cute and cuddley as he may appear, is bent on world domination.
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To help him complete his quest and therefore ensure bunny domination, copy and paste him into your sig
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Postby Qwertyuiopasd on Thu Oct 13, 2005 10:39 am

we can have characters from history/testmonials right? like Fearsome Pirate Pete? if so, i nominate (and elect) Fearsome Pirate Pete.

I'm supprised no one has mentioned Steve the pirate from Dodgeball. or have they and i just forgot to read it. XP
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Postby Solipsy on Thu Oct 13, 2005 8:07 pm

1. We can't use Keith Richards because he has not yet played a pirate. He will be given consideration after such time as he demonstrates his competency in said role.

2. Do we have a second on Burt Lancaster? I can't, because I am unfamiliar with his work.

3. Sorry, Qwerty, Beatified Icons must be living people who have been a. real pirates, b. played character pirates, c. real midgets, d. played character midgets.

4. Is the actor who played Long John Silver in the 1950's being suggested or merely mentioned? For official nomination, the Google Search must be completed.

5. We have a second on Billy Barty, and therefore, he is now Beatified among the Icons of the Faith of the CotFSM.
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Postby Solipsy on Thu Oct 13, 2005 8:12 pm

Those Held Beatified for the FSM Faithful
The list as it officially stands to date:

1. Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow (though the qualifying role may be dropped secondary to general overall desirability)
2. Vern Troyer for his extraordinary contributions to midgetness.
3. Billy Barty (1923-2000) for his amazing long short life.
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Postby Qwertyuiopasd on Thu Oct 13, 2005 8:16 pm

okay, but how bout Sir Francis Drake? he's a cool pirate.

and the guy who played Westly in Princess Bride. him, for his role as the Dread Pirate Roberts.
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Postby Solipsy on Thu Oct 13, 2005 9:02 pm

Sorcerer Qwerty,
You are of course referring to the unbelievable :worship: Cary Elwes, who played Westley, a.k.a. the Dread Pirate Roberts. I wholeheartedly second your nomination, and as that is in my top five movies of all time, could kick myself for not having thought of him.

As for Sir Francis Drake, I am not as familiar with actual pirate legend as I should be, for a member of the CotFSM. Shame be upon me. I have, however, found the following information, which may be useful should someone more familiar wish to second your nomination:

Sir Francis Drake, navigator and privateer, is one of the greatest English sea-captains of all time. Revered as a hero in the fight against the Armada and despised as an upstart by the old nobility, Drake epitomizes the self-made Elizabethan privateer, rapacious in the hunt for treasure (especially Spanish treasure) but daring and visionary in exploration.

Drake and his crew are remembered as the first Englishmen to circumnavigate the globe, claiming a portion of California for Elizabeth along the way. His attack on Cadiz and his devastating raids on the Spanish Main earned him the fear and the grudging respect of the Spaniards, who call him El Draque, "The Dragon".
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