The Gospel According to Everybody

Submit your scriptural writings for inclusion in the Loose Canon, and your tales of ancient FSM Lore, as well as any other FSM-related writing you may have.

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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Kiri-Ame on Sat Jun 26, 2010 11:48 pm

:blush: Thanks :smile:
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby furrylovingpastacat on Fri Dec 31, 2010 11:53 am

loo's gullibility 2
8(or 7) andwhence in that dream the FSM came to see how his journey was going, for loo was next on The Holy List Of The Pasta Checker. he then touched him withs his wonderfull noodely appendege and saw what the strange creture had said

9(or8) this creature is a hater of all things noodely and drunk. do not listen to him as he will do whatever he can to make you want to walk the plank.



hope i got the verse numbers right :blush:
"look at my lovley fur! its got a little maranara sauce in it, but thats ok, it will come out when i clean myself.... with a little help of course ;)"
--- furrylovingpastacat when talking to his favorite furry Friends

let his hollieness rain noodles upon us all!
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Pirate Johnson on Wed Jan 19, 2011 1:58 am

:fsm_yarr: :fsm_rock: :stupid:
In brightest day
In darkest night
No ninjas shall escape my sight
Let those who warrrship evil Unicorn's might
beware my power
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Almighty Doer of Stuff on Thu Aug 18, 2011 5:23 pm

10ish. Verily, Loo was quite surprised to hear this. He asked of the LORD Flying Spaghetti Monster, "Are you sure? That creature was quite noodly. Are you sure you didn't send him to me in drunkenness? Or perhaps, are you drunk now?"

Rugbish. And the FSM spake, "For all I know I did send him to you in drunkenness, I'm sure he didn't just pop out of nowhere. And I admit *hic* I am a bit shloshed right now, but... uh... Avast! I'm your freaking god! Just do as I say! Sometimes I wonder aboush peephumph shushle... hum..."

Futbolsh: "Excuse me?" said Loo, who was not sure whether the FSM was slurring his speech in intoxication, or revealing some new holy incantations to him.

Bolsheviks: The FSM groaned and held the Noodles between His Eyes with one of His Noodly Appendages, much like a pirate holding his forehead while experiencing a headache. and said, "Nevermind that. Just go about your mission like you originally planned and don't kill anyone! Got it? Now wake up!"

14, Maybe. And the LORD smacked Loo in the face, and he did awaken, and he continued along his path, glowing with the knowledge that His Noodly Goodness did reach out and Touch him. Ramen.
!!!@#@#@#@#@!!! CAUTION: THIS PERSON DOES NOT KNOW WHAT HE IS TALKING ABOUT. DISREGARD ANY APPEALS TO AUTHORITY, EXPERIENCE, OR ROMANTIC PROWESS. ANY CORRECT INFORMATION YOU RECEIVE FROM THIS MAN IS PURELY COINCIDENTAL. !!!@#@#@#@#@!!!
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby The Dark Noodle on Thu Sep 01, 2011 4:21 pm

[was in the wrong place so removed]
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby PastorDeGranoDuro on Fri Sep 02, 2011 4:17 am

15. And Loo cried, "Lo, Lord Glob, for truly you are drunken beyond belief! Thou Appendage art abound with carbohydrate! Excuse me, Your Sauciness, I just Farteth!"

16. And the God of Calories and Joules, He that Boileth in a Colander For Our Sins, cried "Fie, Loo, thou art Foul beyond imagination! Thy belly stinketh of Foster's Lager and Baked Beans. How could thee, heathen soul!"

17. And aside from the wretched stench, all was good in the Land.
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby jswalker on Wed Jun 27, 2012 1:44 pm

Cardinal Fang wrote:9. Then He had a beer, and another, and in His inebriation, he saw that all was good.

CF


Then the holey grater suddenly appeared and rasped at the side of his trusty parmesan companion...
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Commander Colander on Fri Aug 17, 2012 11:57 am

18. And the Holey grater spoketh"hast though enough cheeseth to cloggeth thy bowels so as to not offendeth thy bretheren with thy fouleth flatulations?"
19. And Loo replied " oh cheesemith,only our devine noodlines can know the true thickness of cheese necessary to prevent such emanations!"
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Rev. Daniel Scott on Fri Jul 26, 2013 10:59 pm

20. And His Noodliness, Sauced on High, His Meatitude, the Holy Flying Spaghetti Monster proclaimed (within a belch), Be thou plugged!
Pastafarian Doctoral Dissertation: Accepted

Completed Works:

Biblical
OP:
Ghettisis (CH 1-10 complete)
He Who is a Servant of FSM
Narwhal
Couscousum
Zozuniah
To Build or Not To Build
Covenant of Olive

NP:
Midas
Sailamon
2, 3 ParmaJohn
Jude's Kitchen



Confucian
Confusion Analects: Book I


~~~~~Qapla', sak-khet, saith.~~~~~
~~~~~~Finna ilian un atra du~~~~~
~~~~~~evarínya ono varda.~~~~~~
~~~~Mára mesta, Eywa ngahu.~~~~
~~(tlhIngan, Rihannsu, Quenya...)~~
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Temp0ral on Sun Jul 28, 2013 9:13 pm

21. Then Loo was plugged.
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Rev. Daniel Scott on Sun Jul 28, 2013 9:17 pm

22 As it should be.
Pastafarian Doctoral Dissertation: Accepted

Completed Works:

Biblical
OP:
Ghettisis (CH 1-10 complete)
He Who is a Servant of FSM
Narwhal
Couscousum
Zozuniah
To Build or Not To Build
Covenant of Olive

NP:
Midas
Sailamon
2, 3 ParmaJohn
Jude's Kitchen



Confucian
Confusion Analects: Book I


~~~~~Qapla', sak-khet, saith.~~~~~
~~~~~~Finna ilian un atra du~~~~~
~~~~~~evarínya ono varda.~~~~~~
~~~~Mára mesta, Eywa ngahu.~~~~
~~(tlhIngan, Rihannsu, Quenya...)~~
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Dechujoh64 on Sun Aug 11, 2013 11:29 pm

Chapter 3: Loo's Holy Blockage.

1: Then Loo went forward plugged with both food and knowledge to complete his mission with his one true God (Our God) the Almighty Flying Spaghetti Monster.

2: And as Loo got closer to the land of Swiss...(somebody finish this sentence)
Pope Dechujoh is the name.
Oh, here is a list of things that I have writin:
Click the link->The Book of Dechujoh.:
Letter to the Risians. (14 Chapters.) has been writin
Letter to the Udonites. (2 Chpts.) has been writin
Letters between D and M the Udonite. (6 Chpts)has been writin
Letters to the Fiorites is next. Started on.
Revelations 3: The Scroll of the 7 Sealed Pastas(17 Chpts)has been writin
Image<---T.A.R.D.I.S
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby gazraman on Tue Aug 13, 2013 10:25 pm

And the pirates were not of modern form, bent upon harm and marine theft. Rather , they were compelled to engage in jolly hedonism for the benefit and entertainment of all.
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Temp0ral on Wed Aug 14, 2013 9:15 pm

gazraman wrote:, he saw that the pirates were not of modern form, bent upon harm and marine theft. Rather , they were compelled to engage in jolly hedonism for the benefit and entertainment of all.

Modified the above for flow!

4. "What an entertaining approach to life you have there," Loo remarked, "it seems quite lovely."
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Re: The Gospel According to Everybody

Postby Dechujoh64 on Thu Aug 15, 2013 1:37 pm

5: Lovely?!", quipped a pirate named Mertle.
6: "I didn't mean it in that sense" Loo spoke, "I mean that it's cute that you guys are still pillaging and thieving, and have not found the way,and the truth is that as the almighty Flying Spaghetti Monster.
7: "What is this Flying Monster you speak of ? and don't call us cute ever AGAIN! or I'll lop yer head off!" Mertle growled.
8:" Sorry", Loo replied, "Let us start over, my name is Loo and I'm here to bring everyone the good news of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. and I would like to ask, Who are you? and Where are we?"
9: "My name is Mertle, and this be my beach." Mertle yelled.
Pope Dechujoh is the name.
Oh, here is a list of things that I have writin:
Click the link->The Book of Dechujoh.:
Letter to the Risians. (14 Chapters.) has been writin
Letter to the Udonites. (2 Chpts.) has been writin
Letters between D and M the Udonite. (6 Chpts)has been writin
Letters to the Fiorites is next. Started on.
Revelations 3: The Scroll of the 7 Sealed Pastas(17 Chpts)has been writin
Image<---T.A.R.D.I.S
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