Holidays

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Holidays

Postby cf2050 on Tue Sep 16, 2008 4:07 pm

I'm a new convert (already posted at the new convert thread) and have read the Gospel but one thing I'm still confused on is the holidays. Could you please describe when and how to celebrate each of the holidays I've listed below and add in any I miss (as much detail as possible would be great!)

1) Ramedon

2) Pastover

3) Holiday

4) Fridays, now I know when this is but i can't skip school, any advice on how to celebrate Fridays w/o affecting my school work/attendce?

Thanks and RAmen :fsm:
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Re: Holidays

Postby Bearded Clam Admirer on Tue Sep 16, 2008 8:36 pm

Arrr...the answers ye seek are in the Gospel.
:worship: :fsm_float:
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Re: Holidays

Postby cf2050 on Tue Sep 16, 2008 9:19 pm

Bearded Clam Admirer wrote:Arrr...the answers ye seek are in the Gospel.
:worship: :fsm_float:


Aye Matey, but i be hopin' if ere had more details, if nay could someone run o'er what`s in th' Gospel fer me?
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Re: Holidays

Postby spamgirl on Thu Apr 02, 2009 10:05 am

The Gospel of the FSM is available on Amazon.

It says a bit about the holidays and how to celebrate. There is a thread on the topic here as well.

I wish we had a forum here dedicated to discussion of the holidays, suggestions for new holidays (Pastasmas!), and stories about how we celebrate. It would make it easier for new converts to enjoy their new celebrations :)
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Re: Holidays

Postby Moe Sunkist on Fri Apr 03, 2009 12:33 am

Hmm suggestions for new holidays, i like this... (sarcasm)
I hereby dedicate this day as some offensive crack at a Christian's belief in Jesus Christ.

But i dont quite understand your philosophy on holidays. Ive read in other posts form hardcore believers in the FSM and what they all seem to have in common against the Christian God is no physical manifestation of His being. So what do they do? They create holidays that what? Does the spaghetti monster appear to all believers, does he make his presence known by a deep rumbling in your stomachs as the "holy sauce" flows from one brother to the next?

I also have another question. For all the epithets(names) for your god, why monster? My God is called Healer, Father, Friend, Creator. I'd rahter spend time with my heavenly Father than with my heavenly monster.

I love all of you and pray for you in Jesus's perfect name,
Your Humble Servant Moe
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Re: Holidays

Postby MaltaPastafarian on Fri Apr 03, 2009 2:35 am

Hi Moe Sunkist.

Well, there are several definitions of "monster".

One is "a legendary animal combining features of animal and human form or having the forms of various animals in combination, as a centaur, griffin, or sphinx".

Another is "any creature so ugly or monstrous as to frighten people", but of course, you will understand that ugliness is very subjective. We probably seem very ugly to a cocroach.

Another definition is "any animal or human grotesquely deviating from the normal shape, behavior, or character", and again, "gortesquely" is very subjective.

Another definition would be "a person who excites horror by wickedness, cruelty, etc", but this would better describe Yahweh in the "old testament" than our Beloved Spaghetti Monster. After all, our God does not order people to commit genocide (killing even children), to name one atrocity.

Another definition is "any animal or thing huge in size". Etc, etc.

As you see, some terms could have different meanings, depending on our beliefs and the context in which they are used.

For instance, to some people, the Christian Eucharist is communion with God. To others, taken as true, it would be no different to cannibalism.

The same with a resurrected Christ. To non-believers, that story would be no different than any zombie story.

I hope you understand.

RAmen :worship: :fsm:
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Re: Holidays

Postby Moe Sunkist on Fri Apr 03, 2009 1:12 pm

First, I wish to thank you for seriously answering and not dismissing me for another stupid Christian. I appreciate it.
But
Do you have a subjective view on your deity? May I have your personal reasons for calling him a monster?

On the Eucharist idea, though, I understand perfectly where you are coming from and agree whole-heartedly that the endless battles on transubstatiation or whatever its called is absolutely absurd. Our God im sure wont mind if we believe that it is actual flesh or not. I personally believe that it symbolizes the blood and wine. But cannablism, it isnt. Even those who believe that it changes, they believe that it takes on the healing characteristics and holy properties of flesh and blood. I am almost fairly certain no one believes that communion is the actual blood and flesh of Christ.

As to the atrocities caused by our God, if refering to the Passover, God gave the Egyptians ample warning that He wanted His people free from slavery. Twas the Pharoh's stubbornness that caused the infanticide of Egypt. And God is a just God. Pharoh had killed Jewish babies before. He just saw what He had done on a bigger scale.

And to the resurrected Christ and zombie stories. How many resurrected dead were benevolent? I have never heard of a good zombie, but Jesus continued in His teachings when he was resurrected. But i fail to see how a "zombie" is less believable than a floating pile of noodles, pardon the language. I do not mean to offend.

Your Humble Servant Moe
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Re: Holidays

Postby thelastpirate on Fri Apr 03, 2009 1:20 pm

Moe Sunkist wrote:As to the atrocities caused by our God, if refering to the Passover, God gave the Egyptians ample warning that He wanted His people free from slavery. Twas the Pharoh's stubbornness that caused the infanticide of Egypt. And God is a just God. Pharoh had killed Jewish babies before. He just saw what He had done on a bigger scale.


Isnt it specifically noted that God made pharoh stubborn (or along those lines) seemingly to give himself the reason to attack Egypt in various ways?

And to the resurrected Christ and zombie stories. How many resurrected dead were benevolent? I have never heard of a good zombie, but Jesus continued in His teachings when he was resurrected. But i fail to see how a "zombie" is less believable than a floating pile of noodles, pardon the language. I do not mean to offend.


I doubt anybody here will be offended by that. Between you and me, I dont believe his noodlieness the FSM exists. He is only a counter example showing why intelligent design does not merit time in a science class.
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Re: Holidays

Postby Moe Sunkist on Fri Apr 03, 2009 2:02 pm

I remember it specifically states that Moses asks Pharoh a lot to let his people go free from Egypt, and God sent all kinds of plagues on Egypt. and Pharoh didnt listen. Primarily cuz Pharoh was believed to be a god himself by the Egyptians and he didnt want his power usurped by the Christian gods
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Re: Holidays

Postby Buccaneer Banzai on Fri Apr 03, 2009 2:43 pm

Moe Sunkist wrote:First, I wish to thank you for seriously answering and not dismissing me for another stupid Christian. I appreciate it.
But
Do you have a subjective view on your deity? May I have your personal reasons for calling him a monster?


Hi, Moe, and I welcome you and your thoughtful, well-written and reflective posts. Please understand that His Noodliness has a real name that is not only unpronouncable, but if it were to be spoken aloud, it would kill not only the speaker, but anyone within a several-mile radius. We think.

"Monster" is simply the name with which he revealed himself to the prophet, Bob, and actually has no meaning, whatsoever. He could just as easily have been the Flying Spaghetti Linoleum, but that wouldn't have made any sense to anyone. I wish you peace and prosperity, and just remember that, should you choose to "come aboard" with us, matey, there will be a seat for you at the base of the beer volcano! :worship: :fsm_float:

RAmen.
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Re: Holidays

Postby Spector567 on Fri Apr 03, 2009 5:40 pm

Holiday also has many meanings.

Holiday is a contraction of holy and day, holidays originally represented special religious days. This word has evolved in general usage to mean any extra special day of rest (as opposed to regular days of rest such as the weekend). Countrywide, Holidays stands for when everybody plans for holidays or a break. Under many belief systems, days of rest are necessary for ritual or spiritual rejuvenation.

There are many extra special days, remembrance day for one.

As well as many days not celebrated by everyone:
National Day of Listening
Opposite Day
Day of Silence
School Day of Non-violence and Peace
Handsel Monday
Hobbit Day
Honesty Day

While I cannot be sure. I would hope that having fun and having some fun being a pirate. It just happens that religions have created so many holidays that it is impossible not to create a play on words to create our own. It is also in the spirit of Pastafarinism about not taking our selves too seriously.

Afterall we have a thread on twirlers and non-twirlers. How do you eat spaghetti?
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Re: Holidays

Postby Buccaneer Banzai on Fri Apr 03, 2009 7:16 pm

To follow up on my earlier post, here is the section from Uncyclopedia dealing with Our Holy Noodle's real name:

Although the Flying Spaghetti Monster does in fact have a name, it is so beautiful and so difficult to pronounce by humans that it not only kills whoever attempts to utter it, but also everyone within a 3.7614 mile (6.0534 kilometer) radius - this radius is doubled when one attempts to write or type His name. This was done purposely by the Flying Spaghetti Monster not only to amuse Him but to also alert the Pirates as to the presence of a mass punishment, in which they are to join in.

Because of this, humans have created alternative names by which to call their grand master - His Savoriness, the Noodle in the Sky, the Saucy Master and simply referring to Him and His Noodly Appendage instead of attempting to use His glorious name. Apparently, some sects believe that a "Noodle by any other Name is not the same." For example, consider the SPAMites who believe that invoking the wrong name will be punished with eternal shelf-life among generic unbranded noodles. Such sects are considered dangerous by mainstream Pastafarians, though as Madera Allen has said, "Some sects is better than none."


Now...who can argue with that?
RAmen!! :worship: :worship: :fsm:
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Re: Holidays

Postby Qwertyuiopasd on Fri Apr 03, 2009 8:28 pm

Personally I don't exactly approve of most of the Holidays in the Gospel. Sure they're kinda funny, but I feel it goes a bit too far in to the "lol parody of christianity" department.

The only Pastafarian Holidays I celebrate are Talk Like A Pirate Day and Fridays (which are more like Sundays to Christianity).

To answer the original poster about Fridays at school, I dress like a pirate every Friday. Unfortunately I can't wear my awesome pirate hat, but I have boots, a few poofy shirts and a coat that I wear. Hopefully you'll be able to just ask an administrator if it's alright before hand, at least to warn them. If you're worried about anti-pastafarianism, just don't mention it. Say you just want to dress like a pirate.

Moe: Names are what you make of them, I refer to the FSM as a monster in a most affectionate way. Of course, most of the time I focus on the Spaghetti part more than the flying or monster part. On a side note, I believe the best Russian translation for FSM is literally "Flying Spaghetti Thing".

Most Holidays (the decent ones, anyway) are anniversaries of important events. Pastafarianism is a young religion, so I have faith that we'll have some adventures to remember with new holidays.
daftbeaker wrote:But if I stop bugging you I'll have to go back to arguing with Qwerty about whether beauty is truth and precisely what we both mean by 'purple' :moon:


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Re: Holidays

Postby Ubi Dubium on Fri Apr 03, 2009 9:23 pm

Moe, also remember that The FSM (pesto be upon him) was created to combat the Creationist push to include religion in the public school classroom. So the intention here is that we have a religion that has all the elements of any other religion (chosen people, holidays, a Gospel, origin myths, etc.) and that makes claims about science that cannot be proved false. Then we demand equal time. But our "religion" is obviously ridiculous! Including it in the public school curriculum would be preposterous! (And so would including any other religious teaching in science class. That's the point!)

The more our religion looks like a silly version of "normal" religions, the better the satire works. So we borrow from as many as possible. Thus: Pastafarian, Ramendan, Pirate Mosey, the "Eight I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts" and anything else we can think of.

A second effect our church sometimes has is to remind people to take themselves less seriously. I recommend that for everybody.
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Re: Holidays

Postby Tigger_the_Wing on Sat Apr 04, 2009 2:19 am

Moe Sunkist wrote:…As to the atrocities caused by our God, if refering to the Passover, God gave the Egyptians ample warning that He wanted His people free from slavery. Twas the Pharoh's stubbornness that caused the infanticide of Egypt. And God is a just God. Pharoh had killed Jewish babies before. He just saw what He had done on a bigger scale.


Oh, so He killed Jewish babies as well as Egyptian ones? I'm sure that made their respective families very grateful. No, the Pharoh's 'stubbornness' wasn't to blame. I'm quite sure that all sorts of atrocities are commited by people who justify their actions by blaming the victims or some third party, but the Pharoh didn't make God kill those babies, or God wouldn't be all-powerful would He? Funnily enough, were He all-powerful, He would have had no problem fetching His Chosen People out of Egypt without having to harm anyone!

Moe Sunkist wrote:And to the resurrected Christ and zombie stories. How many resurrected dead were benevolent? I have never heard of a good zombie, but Jesus continued in His teachings when he was resurrected. But i fail to see how a "zombie" is less believable than a floating pile of noodles, pardon the language. I do not mean to offend.

Your Humble Servant Moe


Jesus Himself resurrected at least one person; was Lazarus evil? People are resurrected all the time these days; I haven't heard of any of them becoming evil. Quite the opposite, usually. The zombie thing is how the tale appears, logically. Except that zombies are the raised bodies of people whose souls remain in the spirit realms, and Jesus' soul returned to His body to raise it.

Thanks for trying not to offend but since the idea of floating sentient meatballs-and-noodles is supposed to be preposterous it is rather hard to cause offense by being sceptical. That's the point. If one can be sceptical about another's religion, one should extend that scepticism to all other religions, including one's own!
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