Hate Mail (and concerned criticism) archive - Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

Hate-Mail (and concerned criticism) Archives

I am not going to be hateful

Published by Bobby Henderson January 15th, 2009 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 193 Comments

I am not going to be hateful to you, as many others have concerning your religion, if in fact you can call it a religion. This appears to be a mockery of christianity and other monotheists. The comment saying that you have over 10 million members is either one, a lie, or two, proof that the human race is totally depraved. There is major evidence proving christianity, yet none credible towards yours. Thank you,
- Clark

I am going to eat your god

Published by Bobby Henderson January 9th, 2009 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 260 Comments

I AM GOING TO EAT YOUR GOOOOOOOOD!!!!! he looks tasty.

No i meant seriously .. SERIOUSLY. As a christian myself, i love my God and the son of God, Jesus. He has saved me.

WHAT is a dinner gonna do? feed you for one night? Flying Speghetti Monster!!!???? SERIOUSLY!

i hope this is a joke, cause if the nation is stupid enough to believe this bull then they are stupid enough to believe anything whats so ever.

as i am a young adult, i still am not naive enough to buy into this.

SO PLEASE! IM STARVING! IM GONNA HAVE YOUR GOD FOR DINNER TONIGHT! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!

YUMMY SPEGHETTI!
-Crystie

For all the gods of the peoples are idols

Published by Bobby Henderson January 5th, 2009 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 218 Comments

“For all the gods of the peoples are idols, but the LORD made the heavens.” (1 Chronicles 16:26).

“You shall not make anything to be with Me – gods of silver or gods of gold you shall not make for yourselves.” (Exodus 20:23).

“What you have in your mind shall never be, when you say, ‘We will be like the Gentiles, like the families in other countries, serving wood and stone.’” (Ezekiel 20:32).

“Thou shalt have no other gods before me. Exodus 20:3 (Deuteronomy 5:7, Judges 6:10, Hosea 13:4″

-Jerry

Cuss me out, I could care less

Published by Bobby Henderson January 1st, 2009 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 185 Comments

Cuss me out, I could care less. But what you are saying really ticks me off. I believe in someone bigger than anyone could imagine. And trust me, I KNOW He is real. I truly think this “Flying Spaghetti Monster” is a horrible sad joke, something a 4 year old would joke about. This “Bobby” guy needs to get a life, really.

Can this…’FSM’ can give you everlasting life? I think NOT!! I will be praying for you all ( you *really* need it)
-pgh

i think u guys are decieved by the devil

Published by Bobby Henderson December 16th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 549 Comments

I THINK U GUYS ARE DECIEVED BY THE DEVIL AND HIS SPIRITS. MAKING THIS STUFF UP IS MERELY CREATED BY SOMEONE AND ITS AN EXCUSE TO HAVE AND DO WHAT UWANNA DO AND I FEEL THAT SOME SPAGHETTI MONSTER CANT EXPLAIN THE UNEXPLAINED AND CANT HELP ME SPIRITUALLY AS I COME TO REALIZE CHRIST HELPS ME MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY AND I HAVE EVIDENCE THAT THIS IS TRUE AND TRY HIM CHRIST IS REAL AND PERSONALLY THATS MY EVIDENCE. PEOPLE ITS ALL MADE UP THE SPAGHETTI MONSTER ISNT REAL
-kathleen

ironic hipster god

Published by Bobby Henderson December 10th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 201 Comments

You’re all fucking retarded. You think your cool with your irnonic hipster FSM god? You fucktards are just as bad as christians, spouting off the same meme dripples as everyone else. Goddamn you people wouldnt know an original thought if it crawled into your room at night and fondled you while telling you how much it loved you.
-anonymous420

i am concerned

Published by Bobby Henderson November 25th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 224 Comments

I am concerned. This is a joke, right? i mean, people cannot seriously believe in a dinner option. I believe that this ‘pastafarian-ism’ started as a joke made by a lost soul who is against christianism. but reading this website, this has gone too far. i will not swear or mock your unique form of entertainment like others have, but please stop this madness. direct your anger away from christianism and into your own personal lives. Let us not poison the minds of the innocent people that use the internet. Thank you, and I shall be praying for you all.
-Concerned Christian

this Bobby Dude needs to get a Live

Published by Bobby Henderson November 19th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 168 Comments

this Bobby Dude needs to get a Live,A Bible and Seek Jesus as his savior! ya know i look at everything thats going on and i know that Jesus Said that this was gonna Happen this world is going MAD and i know its the End of Time,,,, Sadly Lame Men like Bobby had To Care for his own Benefit and hes taking alot of people to hell with him.
-christian

I would love to beat the living tar out of each and every one of you

Published by Bobby Henderson November 18th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 395 Comments

I would love little more than to beat the ever living tar out of each and every one of you. However, Jesus says i shouldn’t, because it is wrong. Jesus says for us to control our sinful impulses and be nice people. I want to be a nice person, and whenever im not as nice as i could be i say to myself,the greatest glory is not in never failing but in rising each time you fall. That, i believe, is the fundamental difference between atheist and Christians. Atheists say evil is just our primal nature. Christians say evil is both wrong and controllable. May the LORD Jesus rule over God’s people forever Amen.
-Squiggledorf

I’ve tried

Published by Bobby Henderson November 11th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 363 Comments

I’ve tried giving evidence for God.
I’ve tried telling you the benefits of God.
I’ve tried telling you the horrors of Hell.
I’ve tried kindness.
I’ve tried condemning you.
I’ve tried offering you salvation.
My patience is expired with you all.
I have only one question for you all.
Why do hate God so much,what did He do to you to make you doubt His existence. Everything I know, everything I love, is in a Book you hate with all your hearts. My God is great, He is kind, and He is forgiving. Yet still, you curse Him with every word. Everything He hates, you love. Sex,war,blasphemy,hate,mockery, even death you love! All you do to me is mock me. You never give evidence, you only call yourselves enlightened for your lack of faith. God warns that heathens offer freedom,pleasure,and knowledge, but they are lying. I have offered you eternal life, and you have cursed me. I do not curse you, nor your choices,nor any horrid sin you do. I cry for you. I will weep in the presence of God because of you, and because i could not save of you a single soul. So, my sinful,fallen companions i leave you today with just one question. Why?
May Christ Jesus, The One True God, have mercy on you my friends.
-Christian

I am an avid fan of humor

Published by Bobby Henderson November 9th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 159 Comments

Dear Bobby,

I am an avid fan of humor. I have been a supporter for over 25 years. I watch Comedy Central and BET every day. Let’s face it, humor makes me laugh. I recently acquired a pamphlet from your Spaghetti Monster Church, and being succeptible to being swayed by any cult/religion I blindly went to your website. Come to find out, it wasn’t a real church at all! Well, I guess I can let that slide, as after scrolling through your website I noticed a hint of satire.

But I gotta be honest, Robert, if this was an attempt at humor, you missed the mark like Stevie Wonder in a bow and arrow contest. No one can laugh looking at ugly people in halloween costumes. Did you really think that something like that could pass as laughable? If you are going to post a bunch of boring quips and pictures, there better be nudity. Lots of it, or you are missing the point of owning a website. If you are being sacreligious (which is too easy, if you ask me, sir), then you need to add some pizazz. But instead you throw in a stupid picture of spaghetti every now and then and expect a laugh. You either need to hire a Jew to add a punchline every now and again, or call it quits. Better yet, you can hire me for a nominal fee. I could take pictures of my dumps and email it to your website, if you think it helps.

Look, Bobby, you just aren’t funny. Looking at your website is like looking at a ginger person eat a chicken salad sandwich. It just makes you scruntch up your face. Sadly, humor wanted nothing to do with you. Your site is as funny as a Dane Cook standup, but I believe you actually like him, so I’m sure that one went over your head. Either learn how to make people laugh, or stop killing trees for pamphlets to make people go to your gay website.

I said good day, sir,
Josh

Hello my name is Christian which means servant of the Christ

Published by Bobby Henderson November 8th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 330 Comments

Hello my name is Christian which means servant of the Christ. The LORD says that in the end, many false teachers will rise, darwin, muhammed and even your own bobby. I will not be swayed because i have met God. God warns that you cannot explain spiritual things to mortals because they don’t understand them. When you accept God, you are entered by the Holy Spirit of God Himself. That is why i cannot ever be convinced of your fruitless lies. I have personally seen the great power God commands. I will continue to log onto this site for a long time now. For if even one soul be saved while i am here, well in good deeds, none is greater. The LORD is my shield. I will never be convinced by words because words are not as powerful as actions. God has granted me great faith and understanding and as long as the earth endures i will fear no evil for God is with me. You will call me stupid and you will mock me, but unless you become as powerful as Holy Yahweh overnight, and then share a portion of that power with me so that i may never die, i will not be fooled. For the whole world will HATE you because of me-Jesus to His followers- I beg thee to end this, then you will see and and the Truth will shine like 1000 suns. May the Lord Jesus rule over God’s people forever Amen.
-Christian

I am sorry you have been hurt by Christians

Published by Bobby Henderson October 31st, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 228 Comments

I am sorry you have been hurt by Christians. It is obvious by your website. You can deny God all you want but he will not deny you. You can hate God but he loves you. You can say all you want that there is no God, but you can’t say I don’t exist just because you have never physically seen me either.

God himself stated in the Bible that HE is Spirit, does not have a physical body. That is why HE said himself do not create any images and worship it because we have no idea what God really looks like.

I was saddened by your website. I do not know your history and why you are so bitter and angry but I hope you would at least try to ask God if He is for real, then somehow show you He really does exist. God himself stated in the Old Testament to Moses who also said he wanted to see God, if Moses was to actually see God face to face, he (Moses) would die due to God’s holiness, BUT God did pass by, covered Moses eyes, then removed his hand so Moses can at least see God’s back. Even with that Moses face glowed from seeing God’s holiness.

Christianity requires faith of the unseen. The conviction comes to the heart.

If hope you are opened enough to at least consider what I am saying. Do not stereotype Christians. We are not all the same. We are not all condemning or judgemental. We are not all closed minded.

-Soo

Dear dumb ass folowers of FSMism

Published by Bobby Henderson October 30th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 565 Comments

Dear dumb ass folowers of FSMism,

There have been a lot of weird things that i have seen in my life before, but this tops them all. Do you really believe that there is/was such a thing as a flying spaghetti monster? Seriously, how fucking old are you? I know there’s such a thing as freedom of speech and expression, but this kinda shit should be banned. Theres is only one God and one Holy Word. Why dont you people get that? How much sense does it make to say that decreasing numbers of pirates lead to an increase in average global temperature? Is that science or some fifth grader trying to sound smart?

You are the kinds of people I dread to meet in public. If I were to ever have the displeasure of meeting your retarded ass, I would probably beat you senseless untill your stupid childish mind thought like a normal person and believed in something that sounds correct instead of just saying “Eh, lets make a new religion..and what the hell, our ‘god’ should be a clump of spaghetti. Oh, and it should have eyes and be able to fly. Lets bow down to it and see how many people follow suit!”

Damn you all to hell!! Better yet, somebody should lock you in a fucking psychiatric ward for further examination because they obviously didnt do that enough when you dumb fucks were born. I hope this web page is taken off the web as quickly as it was put up.

–Sincerly,
ANNONYMOUS

this is one of the dumbest

Published by Bobby Henderson October 28th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 59 Comments

this is some of the dumbest shit i have ever seen. You have a game for your church you are totally and utterly retarted dud-duh-DUR!! i haven’t laughed this hard in a while so i thank you dumbshits who believe this for entertaining me

P.S. hahahahahahahahahahahahaha fuck you guys but thnx for the laughs

-nirvana

ang on ang on

Published by Bobby Henderson October 26th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 201 Comments

ang on ang on , ang abaat , u fink that theres a big ball of italian food at the pearly gates . do you even realise how offensive this may be to some christians ! , pastafarians r u stupid or wat . get a life ur no worse that them jahovis wittneses or dem ary chrishna ones . u need to get out more u kno. my brain capacity is bigger then urs

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-morgan

YOU PEOPLE ARE FREAKING INSANE

Published by Bobby Henderson October 22nd, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 117 Comments

lets see. YOU PEOPLE ARE FREAKING INSANE. It even says in several articles that this religion is a parody of other reilgions. People who follow this are messed up… and i dont mean the good way. i fucking idoits

I have considered other religions because i am mad with God, but I would never worship something I could eat. Hell, I love spaghetti and will be damned I ever worship something that is an entre that I can eat at Olive Garden.

-Lully-chan

this is all absolute bullfuck

Published by Bobby Henderson October 18th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 96 Comments

THIS IS ALL ABSOLUTE BULLFUCK.
YOU PPL ALL REALLY BELIEVE IN A FUCKIN FLYING DINNER…..
GO DIE MUTHAFUCKERS
-franklin

This is a complete mockery of god

Published by Bobby Henderson October 12th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 278 Comments

This is a complete mockery of god. You all are going to hell for that.

P.S Don’t even think that a Damned spaghetti thing made-up by an asshole will save you.

-T

I can’t believe you have spent so much time

Published by Bobby Henderson October 12th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 162 Comments

I can’t believe you have spent so much time being sarcastic about how stupid you think faith in God is. People who have faith are not crazy, dillusional, or using religion as a crutch. I’ve heard it all. I don’t understand why people like you make fun of the single concept that believing in God comes down to–love. That’s all it’s really about. Making a mockery of something people feel passionate about is kind of a waste of time. I feel bad that you have gotten yourself so deep into this FSM thing and are surrounded by people who agree with you. Some things don’t have to make sense to you to be true.

I believe in what the Bible offers me because it all has a single underlying message: to be a pure and loving person. Although I’m not always, I want to strive to be…and this makes my life happier.

If you were to see a slideshow of your entire life, would you truly feel pride? Would you see yourself with images of sharing positive and happy emotion with others that isn’t based on making fun of Religion?

Someday you will come to a point where you’ll know the Truth. And you may not believe me now, but I’m just trying to help you…the day that you die, if you find yourself afraid and alone, just call out to Jesus. Just remember this.

p.s. check out George G, Ritchie’s Return From Tomorrow.

Love,
Carolyn

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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American