Response from Mrs. Janet Waugh - District 1 - Received 6/25/05

From: JWaugh1052@[xxxxxxx]
To: bobby.henderson@gmail.com
Date: Jun 25, 2005 6:34 AM
Subject: Response from a member of the Kansas Board of Education

Thanks for your comments about the Flying Spaghetti Monster and all the supporters who have sent their support to members of the Kansas Board of Education. I am supporting the recommendations of the science committee and am currently in the minority. I think your theory is wonderful and possibly some of the majority members will be willing to support it.

Thanks again,

Janet Waugh District 1

Response from Mrs. Sue Gamble - District 2 - Received 6/26/05

From: msgamble@[xxxxxxxxx]
To: bobby.henderson@gmail.com
Date: Jun 26, 2005 6:34 PM
Subject: Reply

Dear Mr. Henderson, Thanks for your message. Thanks for the laugh. Your web site is fascinating. I will add your theory to a long list of alternative theories I intend to introduce when it is appropriate. I am practicing how to do this with a straight face which is difficult since it’s such a ridiculous subject; it is also very sad that we are even having the discussion.

I will be one of the four member minority who will be voting against the flawed science standards currently being proposed by the six member majority.

Sincerely,

Sue Gamble

Response from Mrs. Carol Rupe - District 8 - Received 8/16/05

From: Carol Rupe
To: bobby.henderson@gmail.com
Date: Aug 16, 2005 8:19 AM
Subject: Kansas State Board of Education

Dear Mr. Henderson,

In the midst of the sad circumstances of having our science standards lowered, you and your legion of fellow FSM followers have offered wonderful comic relief. Rather than the form letters which we often receive on other topics, each FSM letter has been clever and unique. I responded to several at first, but now there have just been too many. I am a member of the Kansas State Board of Education and have voted repeatedly to maintain excellent science standards. Last week was the vote to send a new draft (written by the 6 conservative members) out for external review. The four of us on the board who are moderates were in the minority on the vote. The group of science teachers and university professors who had written the original standards (before they were changed) have now asked that their names be withdrawn from the document. The new version changes the very definition of science from “seeking natural explanations” to “seeking logical explanations”. That is why I think FSMism is able to be included. It is as “logical” as any other theory.

The final vote on the standards will be in October. We will be in Lawrence, Kansas for that meeting. Those of us who are moderates on the board are trying to have the meeting in the Natural History Museum at the University of Kansas. We think that would be an appropriate setting for the occasion. We welcome you to be in attendance.

We have received thousands of emails from scientists around the world. At first, they all tried to explain good science to us. After the vote last week, however, they have resorted to calling us hillbillies and morons. And those are the nice letters!

Thank you for adding levity to this situation. You have developed quite a following. I was wondering if we could reverse the effects of global warming if we started breeding pirates.

Sincerely,
Carol Rupe

P.S. I ordered a Kansas Museum of Science t-shirt. I may just have to wear it to a board meeting.

From: Mrs. Kathy Martin, District 6

“It is a serious offense to mock God.”

1171 Responses to “Kansas School Board Responses to the Open Letter”

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  1. 841 - September 6th, 2007 at - Rowdiest Wench Says:

    @ Alchemist - did you say “dirty”?? :D

  2. 842 - September 6th, 2007 at - Josh Says:

    I am a Christian and wholly believe what I’ve come to experience and learn to be true about Christian beliefs, and I agree that a lot of Christian’s can be quite unloving and judgmental at times of other people’s beliefs.
    It’s not half obvious that this site is meant to be satirical, so why do:
    a) people get so upset about it (are so many people lacking humor???)
    b) on the flipside speak as though this set of teachings to be true only to stir more trouble?
    personally I see this site in some ways as an excuse for atheists who know in the deepest of hearts that there is a greater power out there (for the sake of the argument, “whatever that power may be”) to mock those with beliefs that differ to theirs, and also an excuse to distance themself from ever having to consider religion.
    meh anywayz, each to his own
    guess you’ll find out one day when you die ay? ;-D

    cheers

  3. 843 - September 6th, 2007 at - ☠DutchPastaGuy☠ Says:

    @Josh
    “personally I see this site in some ways as an excuse for atheists who know in the deepest of hearts that there is a greater power out there”
    .
    I think that line explains the difference between atheists and believers rather well. Atheists generally take what their brains say as more important then what their hearts say in determining their world views. My heart sometimes tells me things that my mind says are not rational. Try taking the rational reasoning of your brain over the often pleasant but unrealistic cries of your heart. You may fear losing a lot of ‘nice’, but without fairy tales the world is still an amazing place and the sense that what you see and think of it is real does make it so much better than being on what is essentially mental crack-cocaine. It gives you awesome dreams but it’s not good for you.

  4. 844 - September 6th, 2007 at - Alchemist Says:

    Josh
    “meh anywayz, each to his own…”
    .
    Yup - I’m all for that. Shame some of the other buggers in LaLa Land haven’t worked that out yet.
    .
    .
    “and also an excuse to distance themself from ever having to consider religion.”
    .
    Sorry mate - that’s complete bollocks. We do consider religion - a lot! As DPG points out - we consider it to be poison. I think it’s stunting the development of our species.
    I wonder how many of the faithful actually *consider* religion?
    IMHO very few (I’m an ex-christian Josh so I’m not talking total balls - well, no more than usual :D)
    .
    .
    “…speak as though this set of teachings to be true only to stir more trouble?”
    .
    Yeah - so? Dawkins is spot on with this - religion shouldn’t be excluded from criticism just because it’s religion.
    What’s wrong with stirring some shit from time to time.
    Sometimes it’s necessary.
    .
    Well, after that little speech I’ll say “Welcome to the CoFSM” :D and mean it. You are welcome.
    If you fancy sticking around and putting your arguments across more the better…
    RAmen

  5. 845 - September 6th, 2007 at - One-eyed Wonderkin Says:

    The thing that I find real interesting is that christians think that their god has not talked to them in over 2000 years. They are so sure that the other religions based on christianity such as mormonism and islam are wrong. I guess the christians inherited this from the jews.
    .
    keep an open mind, but just make sure that you don’t let anybody shit in it.

  6. 846 - September 6th, 2007 at - lachy Says:

    Well how about all this fuss. I say let them teach intelligent design. Personallly i would find it hilarious, others meaningful. Science itself is not necessarily ever proven, just argued for with evidence. I am not Christian, or religious, and happy. Happy to be proved wrong as well. How about we spend time learning, and make up our own minds. Let the ‘Faithful’ believe what they want. Kids are not that dumb, especially high school kids, emotional, over earnest yes, but dumb, no.
    Let nature tak its course, learn evolution and intelligent design, and see what ‘evolves’ from that.

  7. 847 - September 6th, 2007 at - El Peatieablo Says:

    @lachy
    Two problems with your suggestion.
    1: Kids actually are quite dumb (on average, I mean). Talk to a hundred, individually, I bet about ten say something intelligent. Talk to a hundred, all at once, I bet one or two say something intelligent. Religions take advantage of this quite often by indoctrinating their youth as young as they can.
    +
    2: ID is not science. As such, it has no place in a science classroom. It could be taught in a religion classroom, but this classroom could not be in a public school.
    * disclaimer* You were right, science can’t be proven to be absolutely true, because a supernatural force (i.e. His Noodly Appendage) could be messin’ with stuff. This is true of all studies, but science probably has the least margin of error in other ways.

  8. 848 - September 12th, 2007 at - Ned Says:

    Of course there are super-intelligent beings out there. If it makes you feel better to to call them God, then fine. I call them aliens. They have mastered nanotechnology, time, space, matter, energy, and things we have not yet conceived. They can create new life from novel DNA arrangements and populate terraformed planets with their creations. Are these advanced civilizations what the Bible refers to as God? I doubt it. The people who invented the Bible had no concept of advanced technology. They were just telling stories about things their primitive minds could not understand. Modern humans and our technology would be viewed as prophets or even Gods to those living in the Middle East 2000 years ago. What would Moses have to say about my laptop? What would Jesus have to say about my 2,000,000 volt tesla coil? Magic? A cigarette lighter would have at least earned you a the worship of a village or two.

  9. 849 - September 12th, 2007 at - Pluto Says:

    Wow! A scientologist!
    My friend had views like that, and when he found out that they were similar views to Tom Cruse, he spent 2 weeks in bed with server depression (and that’s no joke! I don’t do jokes. The only joke I know has the word cunt in it.) So Ned, do you think the aliens put us here? And if so, were did they come from? And don’t say more aliens; show me the top of the chain!!
    And yes, any technology sufficiently advanced would appear as magic. Even some in use today.

  10. 850 - September 12th, 2007 at - Pluto Says:

    One more thing Neddy. Why do you have a “2,000,000 volt tesla coil”? Are you one of those mad scientist types? Or are you just a little angry?

  11. 851 - September 12th, 2007 at - One-eyed Wonderkin Says:

    @Ned - Does this mean that you are an atheist? I sounds like you so super-intellegent and the rest of us say the FSM.
    .
    You make a valid point; however, why would an advanced alien culture care about covering its tracks? Also, why “terraform” then populate with single cell organisms and hope for evolution to take hold? Hmm, do you think that the fossils were planted and man was made directly? There are so many questions. These are a couple to start on.

  12. 852 - September 12th, 2007 at - Paulo Rodrigues Says:

    I can’t understand why these creationists can’t see evolution as part of intelligent design.

    If the christian god just sat down and invented a bunch of animals many of which are similar, flawed, redundant and became extinct, it wouldn’t be all that impressive

    If on the other hand, if God sat down and planned evolution in all its stages, extinctions and all, to reach his goal then that would be a seriously impressive piece of design and project management.

    I bet that’s what the Sphaghetti Monster would have done so that we might make food in his image.

  13. 853 - September 13th, 2007 at - Grotty Says:

    Just ‘found’ this site - what a great place!! Keep up the good work!
    If I was going to be converted to any form of religion, this would be the one for me!
    RA-men

  14. 854 - September 17th, 2007 at - mike Says:

    Wow…Is this real?

  15. 855 - September 22nd, 2007 at - hoodia Says:

    hoodia…

    revolutionary. breathtaking. awesome post dude. …

  16. 856 - September 26th, 2007 at - Kris Says:

    wow.. you people are fantastic! joined the cause on facebook and was led here by a series of clicks! no doubt my hand was led by The Great Flying Spaghetti Monster.
    I pledge to our creater that I will be a good (i.e. bad) pirate and spawn many children.
    RAmen

  17. 857 - September 26th, 2007 at - Brian from DownUnder Says:

    AAAAArrrrrr me hearites ye’ve skirted the real point, by-passed the real argument and ignored the facts which are verily thrust into yer very faces!

    It’s all about POWER. No, not the kilojoules type, the hearts and minds type.

    Ever since His Ineffable Sauciness placed a second human on his creation, humankind has struggled, scratched, bitten, kicked, stolen and killed to be “in charge”. Every church is just a human-made power structure. Wars between religions are NEVER about whose “invisible friend” is better, they are just about who gets to be top dog.

    The biggest problem with building power on the “ineffable”, “inscrutable” and invisible deity is that some people can actually think for themselves and refuse to be conned. Therefore it is necessary to ensure that those who would think for themselves are snowed under by false evidence as early as possible. Hence the push to “teach” Intelligent Design in schools, as a science.

    Rebel and turn Pirate, say I! Tell those who would shackle your children to AVAST YE LUBBERS! Before we find ourselves further hoodwinked by the likes of George Dubya and whoever has their hand up the back of the obviously unthinking puppet.

    ramen.

  18. 858 - September 30th, 2007 at - Divine Maninfestation Says:

    Behead all those who say that FSM is a violent religion!

  19. 859 - October 1st, 2007 at - Timmy the Taint Says:

    Excuse my ignorance of such a supreme and omnipotent being. Before this day, I have lived my life in mindless provincialism. Now, after being exposed to His saucy goodness, I have forever enlightened my heart, body, mind and soul, and have forever fouled my breath with His eternal garlicy stink - but in a GOOD way!

    I have a few questions that can probably be answered by reading Bobby’s book, but maybe you can help me out:

    1. As a newly converted pastafarian, I was wondering how this religion explains dinosaurs, early man and survival of the fittest? I mean, I fully understand that all these things can easily be constructed by our linguini-shaped Lord, but is there an explanation as to why the first two are no longer with us, and was it because of their inability to adapt?

    2. Do we get in trouble for eating his buccatini brethren for dinner or lunch?

    3. Do I have to pay a tithing (cuz, if so, count me out).

    4. Where do we congregate?

    5. Is it a saucy sin to hunger over the delicious “body” of our Lord?

    6. Are meals involved at all with the service?

    That is it for now, but I will have more. I am so excited… and really, really hungry for some reason.

  20. 860 - October 1st, 2007 at - ☠DutchPastaGuy☠ Says:

    @Timmy the Taint
    1 The FSM loves a joke and whenever scientists try to date fossils or bones He is there to change the readings. So we don’t know very well when what species died out or why. It’s best just to put your faith in Him (although He won’t be offended if you don’t).
    2 No
    3 No. The FSM doesn’t want us to build expensive churches etc in His glory. He prefers you to spend the money on living in peace, curing disease or lowering the cost of cable.
    4 We have plans to commandeer a pirate fleet that would be our spiritual home. Also, the Galapagos islands have special meaning to some of us.
    5 Definately not!
    6 Observing mass in Pastafarianism can be done through having a beer or eating spaghetti, so knock yourself out. Some Pastafarians are acting out their faith all through their free Saturday evenings and into early Sunday mornings. But you can be religious in any measure you like.

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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American




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