Response from Mrs. Janet Waugh – District 1 – Received 6/25/05
From: JWaugh1052@[xxxxxxx]
To: bobby.henderson@gmail.com
Date: Jun 25, 2005 6:34 AM
Subject: Response from a member of the Kansas Board of Education
Thanks for your comments about the Flying Spaghetti Monster and all the supporters who have sent their support to members of the Kansas Board of Education. I am supporting the recommendations of the science committee and am currently in the minority. I think your theory is wonderful and possibly some of the majority members will be willing to support it.
Thanks again,
Janet Waugh District 1
Response from Mrs. Sue Gamble – District 2 – Received 6/26/05
From: msgamble@[xxxxxxxxx]
To: bobby.henderson@gmail.com
Date: Jun 26, 2005 6:34 PM
Subject: Reply
Dear Mr. Henderson, Thanks for your message. Thanks for the laugh. Your web site is fascinating. I will add your theory to a long list of alternative theories I intend to introduce when it is appropriate. I am practicing how to do this with a straight face which is difficult since it’s such a ridiculous subject; it is also very sad that we are even having the discussion.
I will be one of the four member minority who will be voting against the flawed science standards currently being proposed by the six member majority.
Sincerely,
Sue Gamble
Response from Mrs. Carol Rupe – District 8 – Received 8/16/05
From: Carol Rupe
To: bobby.henderson@gmail.com
Date: Aug 16, 2005 8:19 AM
Subject: Kansas State Board of Education
Dear Mr. Henderson,
In the midst of the sad circumstances of having our science standards lowered, you and your legion of fellow FSM followers have offered wonderful comic relief. Rather than the form letters which we often receive on other topics, each FSM letter has been clever and unique. I responded to several at first, but now there have just been too many. I am a member of the Kansas State Board of Education and have voted repeatedly to maintain excellent science standards. Last week was the vote to send a new draft (written by the 6 conservative members) out for external review. The four of us on the board who are moderates were in the minority on the vote. The group of science teachers and university professors who had written the original standards (before they were changed) have now asked that their names be withdrawn from the document. The new version changes the very definition of science from “seeking natural explanations” to “seeking logical explanations”. That is why I think FSMism is able to be included. It is as “logical” as any other theory.
The final vote on the standards will be in October. We will be in Lawrence, Kansas for that meeting. Those of us who are moderates on the board are trying to have the meeting in the Natural History Museum at the University of Kansas. We think that would be an appropriate setting for the occasion. We welcome you to be in attendance.
We have received thousands of emails from scientists around the world. At first, they all tried to explain good science to us. After the vote last week, however, they have resorted to calling us hillbillies and morons. And those are the nice letters!
Thank you for adding levity to this situation. You have developed quite a following. I was wondering if we could reverse the effects of global warming if we started breeding pirates.
Sincerely,
Carol Rupe
P.S. I ordered a Kansas Museum of Science t-shirt. I may just have to wear it to a board meeting.
From: Mrs. Kathy Martin, District 6
“It is a serious offense to mock God.”
@The Beer Baron Oct 27th, 2007 at 9:27 pm
“My deity could beat up your deity!”
.
Of course! Our deity has bigger balls!
RAmen
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I know it’s been said before, but, for the love of the Noodly One, if it can’t be proven, it’s not science.
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Is it just an American spelling oddity or should it be an “offence” to mock God, not an offense ? I suppose if colour can be color and ignorance can be bliss then silence is golden.
Slug D’Amour
P.S. The FSM lives in my right shoe.
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May the good master have mercy on your sauce Mrs. Martin. You and your kind obviously do not understand what kind of damage you are doing by dishing out the wrong kind of sauce that the great master has designed for us. Please try worshiping Him in the way we have been taught…you may find yourself fulfilled….AAARGG.
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I just wanted to let everyone know that Carol rupe will not be standing for re-election in 2008. I spoke with her at a political function several weeks ago and she confirmed this. A very good candidate currently serving on the Wichita local BOE, Connie Dietz, has filed for this State BOE position as her replacement.
One further note…… Even 1 1/2 years out from the infamous FSM incident in my classroom, many state education leaders still remember how Connie Morris stepped into a big pile of **** when she demanded that the FSM symbol on my classroom door be removed during a tour of my school in 2006. I was reminded of this just this past week when the state school superintendent’s association held a meeting in my building and many inquired about one of our “claims to fame”!
FYI: here is a link to our local newspaper/blog thread on the FSM
http://blogs.kansas.com/weblog/2007/11/cult-of-flying.html
Ramen
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I have just discovered pastafarianism and it is about as close to religion as my agnostic self can get. Besides, I live for all forms of pasta and realize now the reason behind my lifelong search for all noodly forms. I see now how the FSM has actually been present in me all these years and showing me the way, the truth and the light, because no one gets to have high carbo loads without the FSM.
The whole idea of the FSM is a wonderful counterpoint to the sorry BS of the ID weenies. They are entitled to believe in whatever god they choose, but shouldn’t expect to be able to force their beliefs on others and have them taught as facts. A few things bother me about these folks.
1. They refuse to think. If something cannot be satisfactorily explained by current scientific knowledge or there are conflicting data, it must be wrong and therefore “god did it.” ID is the panacea of the intellectually lazy.
2. They are intolerant of any beliefs but their own, meaning they are right and everyone else is wrong. This is the key failing of virtually all religions (except possibly pastafarianism). All religions believe they are the only one that is right so everyone else is going to go to hell (or its equivalent). This of course means everyone is going to wind up in the same place. Which is, of course, true. We all die.
3. ID adherents focus on creationism based on middle eastern creation myths from a book of questionable authorship. Yet they accept many other elements of science–a paradigm of selected beliefs. The bible, doesn’t mention nuclear physics or relativity, so they are OK as science. Which makes one wonder that if the bible stated the world was flat and the universe revolved around the earth if those points would the ID folks want those to be taught in schools along with the science.
Arrrgh! Avast mateys, it’s pasta for breakfast.
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Do you think his holiness is Ragu or Prego?
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Dear FSM,
I want to give thanks to you for allowing me to graduate from USD #259, Northeast Magnet, Wichita, KS. I believe that Your almighty plan was for me to attend the same school of thought that Mrs. Carol Rupe taught at and I thank you for that. I appreciate that not all of us share in the limited mentality’s that reside in the State of Kansas, such as those of Ms. Kathy Martin, District 6. It is because of people like her that the State of Kansas is unable to attract substantial investment. Because of these simpletons, most of the creative class of Kansas choose too relocate to other cities, where intelligent design is manifested at IKEA or in a Mercedes Benz. Thank you, Oh FSM for the wisdom and courage to leave behind the Ms. Kathy Martin’s of the world. Thank You!!!
Derrick Osborne
San Diego
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I love pasta, my girlfriend does, both my kids do too – and like monsters! What a match. They especially want the cool T-shirts – I guess in Germany the Religion-Thing isn’t as important to most. To each her/his own…
But why not teach Dan Simmons’ Hyperion Cantos in school too? It would also make an extremely long and really cool Movie – to further spread the religion…
Guess that would count as blaspemy here – hmm!
It would be a lot more fun in class than reading the Bible though.
Ok, my son prefers the pirates…
Hell – Pasta for everyone!
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After a lifetime of searching I am blessed to be touched by His Noodly Appendage.
All the major and minor religons cannot hold a light to the FSM.
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My life has been touched. I can’t believe that there is a long list of hate mail. It seems unfair. We are only trying to worship His Noodleness.
In conclusion.
Yaaaaaaaaaar.
=]
Go in noodles. Praise be to Him.
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I just want to saw that we should accept Kathy’s advice and no longer mock god, it goes against The Flying Spaghetti Monster’s first “I’d really rather you didn’t”.
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It’s supremely arrogant to believe that anything in existence is not of God. The FSM is perfectly within the realm of God. Y’all who insist that there’s only one kind of God are the sinners. It’s your narrow and automatic concept that is mistaken. No one gets to define what God is and is not, regardless of how threatened or insecure you are from someone else’s ideas. In other words, get over yourself.
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Flying Spaghetti Monster… PHAH! That’s the most rediculous thing I’ve ever heard of. Obviously made up by feeble minds. Your story doesn’t even have him turning water into wine, walking on water or returning from the dead. Come on!
Love,
Jeebus
http://www.OffensiveChrist.com
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@ Jeff M
Well said. How ever I think that the attacks by fundamental idiots will continue. The fact is they ignore or condemn anything that does not fit in to their world view, so you will also be ignored I’m afraid.
.
@Jesus H. Tap-Dancing Christ
Loved the YMCA pic on your site. You should make it into a t-shirt
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How dare you even propose that the great and bountiful spagheti monster is as equivalently dismissive as any half baked theory about the intelligent design of creation. All is encompassed within his noodly mass and any deviation from his life maintaining form is prompting his apocalyptic anger. We the faithful of his noodly whim swear a sacred oath in his name to defend his masterful presence and our obligation to inform others of his one true manisfestations with any means he permits us. I swear that if his theory does not take the place of all others including the heresies of Christianity that we will strike a most grevious blow at you and whet his noodly appendages with the blood of the faithless YOU. Dam you to the rancid pits of his places of punishment.
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Yarrr-harrr-harr! Really, really funny, but dangerous… God is patient, but eventually we will all be held accountable.
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FSM is the Toleratant, and Created the illusion of christianity to hide the true believers!
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As one of the only true representatives of His Noodleness I am calling for a return to conservative FSM orthodoxy. It is true that FSM is Tolerant (and Tolertant). It is also true the FSM has required all TRUE FSM believers to SMITE everyone who does adhere to the rules I just made up. Return to the true faith or face being set adrift aboard a burning ship by a loving FSM.
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as fundy’s seem to like to do, lets take a quote, change it (read: mistranslate) to something else, and own orthodoxy.
.
.
.
SOUTH PARK, CARTMAN: tonight, on the 921th post, someone is gonna say some shit
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this idea is amazing, the whole problem is that there are a minority of religious fanatics that think that they can oppress, subjegate and force their beliefs onto the rest of us without a shred of physical evidense to the point of global terrorism. long live the flying spaghetti monster.
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Our prophet, Bertrand, has told us that The Teapot is the only true god and it is The Teapot that we must worship.
Your false spagettini is harming the minds of the young and the impressionable.
The Teapot will forgive your blasphemy, provided that you drink of The Cup and Saucer daily at 4PM.
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http://snarfd.com/2007/11/28/the-flying-spaghetti-monster-appears-in-pumpkin-pie/
Praise his Noodley Appendage! It’s a miracle!
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Isn’t it reassuring to know there are people among us who can speak for God, such as Kathy Martin.
I know whenever I recover from my hangover early enough on Sunday morning to catch me a televangelist’s show, I’ll hear one of them tell me something. “Know somethin, God’s the kind of guy who would double down with the devil, on a bet ’bout whether your soul’s a goinin’ to heaven.” And I’m wondering, who does this person know the deity’s gambling tendencies?
Could it be because they went to school together out east, and he held God’s head when he puked in the bushes becasue he shot 14 tequila when his girlfriend dumped him?
Did they pull all nighters together studying for their calculus final?
Was he best man at god’s wedding? And did he throw god’s batchelor party?
Did they go on those weekend junkets to vegas together, play golf together?
Just wondering.
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It it amazing how people like Cathy Martin equate their self indulgent stupidity with God. Clearly since her stupidity and God are one and the same, when we mock the idiocy of the fundies we mock god himself, and commit “a serious offence”.
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Just had to say this is the funniest I have ever seen, but After reading the Hate mail
I was suprissed at how many people don’t have a sense of humour…
Oh Well
Keep going
a reformed FSM
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I’m from Britain, so I’m not entirely sure how it works in the United States, but in Britain we have ‘Religious Education’ lessons, where ideas such as ID and deities can be discussed and argued rationally and coherently. Does America have such a thing?
/O\
I’m afraid it wouldn’t be politically expedient. Our leaders have a vested interest right now in placating the evangelists–they’re a large chunk of the voters, you know.
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I bet that Mrs. Carol Rupe looks totally hot in her Museum of Science t-shirt! Does she wear panties with that or just the t-shirt? Shiver me timberrs,ARRRGH!
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hello i am from india- i’m sure u must not be knowing much abt the education system of a 3rd world country such as ours -but i’m happy to tell u -that though we have many problems- trying to teach intelligent design and creationism or its hindu counterpart has never been attempted or even talked abt. thankfully -darwin still rules the roost here.the closest they came was trying to make astrology a science subject at college level -but a big public outcry has thankfully prevented that.i’m unable to comprehend how thinking responsible people can mix science with religion like this.kudos to u for ur wonderful monster and to all the board members who opposed the stupid move. i’m a whole hearted pastafarian from now on and will spare no effort in spreading our lord’s word. RAmen
partha
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as a person raised in a christian home, i have always had many objections and problems with the bible and such things, but pastafarianism has actually presented a somewhat more believeable outlook on the origin of the world. i cant believe that, even though one of the big things taught at my house growing up was tolerance of others beliefs, some christians believe that they need to take it upon themselves to inform others when their beliefs are wrong or offensive.
kind of sad that we can practice what we preach
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Anyone who does even a small amount of checking will find out that virtually every religion has “ripped off” ideas from earlier religions, look at the history of jesus, and compare it to the greek gods and tell me if you see nothing that is similar about his origins. While i just don’t buy into that quagmire that needs it’s mindless drones to make it work in the first place, so that is why i will throw my hat in with the great F.S.M. because at least he/she/it has more of a ring of truth than anything else that is floating around these days, and can be verified just as easily as ol` god and jebus. If you think that i am making up that bit about the history of jesus, go to my website and go through the Archived Entries, it is the fourth entry i think, in the “If ya don’t like it, T.S.” Section. Now, if ye bother me agin I’ll slice ye from belly to brisket, now back to me Grog!
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Hello all. I’m a recent Pastafarian convert (august 07). It all made sense to me as soon as I learned of his noodly existence. I have always loved pasta and pirates.
I live in Ontario, Canada and in our recent provincial election, one political party actually began their campaign with a “faith-based” school initiative. With all of the zeal recent converts typically convey, I recruited 2 others (also recent FSM converts) to begin preparing a proposal for funding a school for the FSM. We faced a serious uphill battle: new religion; Pastafarians being typically shy about expounding on our beliefs, we needed a strategy to find kids to attend our new schools; putting together a capital cost budget for buildings; recruiting teachers etc. You can see clearly that we had our work cut out for us. Unfortunately (or fortunately), they lost the election and our proposal quickly became moot. However, just in case there are others who find themselves in this situation, let me give you some ideas about our proposed curriculum: physical education would include swashbuckling; our school mascot would be a parrot; Fridays would be for school assemblies in full pirate regalia; in our music classes, the kids would sing sea shanties, which would dovetail nicely with science class, ie the declining pirate population – increased global warming issue. Of course, along with the Canadian flag, we would have flown the Jolly Roger outside our schools and our lunchrooms would serve a variety of pastas every day.
I have been spreading the word faithfully ever since converting. At the start, I even thought I had converted an evangelical Christian to our cause (what a coup that would have been!), but when he discussed it with some of his fundamentalist friends, they concluded that FSMism is (and I quote) “silly”. This is someone who thinks it’s normal to talk to his god and actually receive answers. And he thinks the FSM is silly. I don’t know about the rest of you, but pots and kettles come to mind here.
I have read the gospel through and through, and will re-read it very soon. I have found that I can totally buy into this, as opposed to other “mainstream” religions. I have been a confirmed atheist for 25yrs; however, since FSMism is evidence-based, I see no contradiction in being both a Pastafarian AND an atheist. As Dr. Richard Dawkins says, [sic] we are all atheist about someone’s gods.
Keep up the good work. Spread the word.
May his noodly appendage touch you.
Yours in pasta,
Virginia
ps
Arggggh
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Hack again?!
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Hack again?!
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yarrrr
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I liked the last one. xD
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I curious to know who is mocking your god, Mrs. Martin.
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“It is a serious offense to mock God.”
If we are in God’s image, then God must have a sense of humor. That is, unless he has a stick lodged up his ass.
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Mrs. Martin is very right! Stop those christians from perverting the truth of our Lord the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
March on, warrioress of FSM!
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it is a serious to mock god, that is why none of us are mocking the great and powerful Flying Spaghetti Monster. To mock the Flying Spaghetti Monster would invite the wrath from His Noodly Appendage, which none of us would want
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Hi, Mrs. Martin
No one is mocking God, Mrs. Martin, let me make that perfectly clear. We are mocking YOU! I am of the christian faith and I am TOTALLY against the teaching of religion (overtly or, in your case, covertly) in public school. The government screws up EVERYTHING it gets its hands on. Do you really think I want them teaching my children about God? You guys can’t even do, correctly, the job you’re supposed to be doing now. That’s point one. The second point would be that I have respect for my fellow parents who may not, for whatever reason, want religion taught to their children. To you guys at FSM – keep up the good work by keeping the “fundies” at bay.
Yours in,
“Your story is as good as mine”
Alan
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Interesting that Mrs. Kathy Martin is associating the scientific theory of the FSM being the creator of all things with God. To my knowledge the “argument” used by the Kansas Board of Education (that’s a loaded definition, to call this education) is that the “Intelligent Design” has nothing to do with religion (therefore God) but it is indeed a scientific theory.
She should make up her mind. Is this mockery of science (Intelligent Design) religion or science? If it is indeed science there should be no discussion of God (an intrinsic religious definition).
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I am reminded of Goerge Burns playing the lead character in the movie “OH GOD!” (i am sure you were offended by that is well). In that movie, Burns, in the role of the almighty, said, “I’m a comedian playing in a room of people who are afraid to laugh”. I may not be a learned individual sucjh as yourself but in this I am sure, God has a sense of humor, otherwise how do you explain the Platypus?
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