I havenâ€™t read the book; and I havenâ€™t seen it in any hotels yet either. Does the FSM offer life after death? That is the main thing I am looking for. I will have to admit that I used to have religion that offered that, but it was to unbelievable. After all, what God would give a person such a marvelous brain, then ask you not to use it.
I live in Oregon (USA), the Goll Darn greatest state in the union. It is also fretfully the least churched state, but hopefully that could change with this new FSM scripture being realized and written here.
Does anybody want to start a FSM Church here in Oregon? Maybe we could find an old un-used church complete with the Michaelangelo(speeling?) painting with his nOOdleyness!! I here the tax breaks are fantastic. We could have spaghetti feeds and have a faith based program for getting say math users and alcoholics of those nasty drugs.
I admire your enthusiasm. You really should get a copy of the Gospel, or The Word as I like to call it. It will anser many of your questions.
Is there a FSM heaven? Yes. It has a beer volcano and a stripper factory.
Does anyone want to build a church? As outlined in his “I Really Wish You Wouldn’ts”, the FSM would prefer we not spend money on building churches/temples to His Noodly Greatness when that money could be better spent feeding the starving, housing the homeless, or improving the quality of American made beer (OK, I added that last one).
Markus you should take heed of OneEyedJack (a fine piratical title to be sure), having plundered a copy of the Gospel (or The Word) or as it referred to here The Treasure Chest of Wisdom. I cannot recommend it highly enough, a fine tome for perusal between voyages.
As further evidence of his noodly love and constant attention to our needs i believe the FSM has already heeded Jacks pleas and improved American beer, you can plunder it easily, it’s being called British Beer and there are many varities, all may be correctly termed Grog, although most are somewhat darker and stronger than the beer plundered elswhere and have a long track record of sustaining pirates on long voyages…
may ye plundering be bountiful and ye wenches buxom
I don’t know about building an actual church. How about renting an abandoned drive-in theater? Or, we could converge on the Pirates of the Carribean ride at Disney World, and we could all astrally project ourselves there at the same time. Hmmm…. I’ll have to think more about that one. If spending time online at this website constitutes as attending church, I’ve been more of a churchgoer over the past month than I have in my entire life up to now. I’ve been redeemed and saved by the blessed touch of his noodly appendage! Even though I’m a good SaucyWench, though, I don’t really speak Pirate well. I guess that’s the next step in my conversion to complete wenchhood.
His teaching have left me in doubt of my place in the eternal universe for I am a reformed sinner! Can I hope to enter His kingdom when I die for I have done much to offend Him.
I grew up catholic, I served in the Coast Guard (which hunts pirates), I don’t really like beer.
On the plus side, I DID marry a stripper. Does that count for anything?
Wow, Duneman… a pirate hunter. That is really unfortunate. Of course, pirates couldn’t be pirates without someone to chase them, could they? I offer that pirate hunters are also part of his Noodly Design.
I wouldn’t worry too much about Heaven. You said you don’t like beer and already have your own stripper. Sounds like you’re set.
Pull up a chair and have some pasta.
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