Last updated 7/2008

Q: Who are you?

A: My name is Bobby Henderson. I’m 27. I grew up in Oregon and move around a lot. I have a physics degree and have successfully avoided a “real” job for years.

Q: Did you really send the Open Letter to the Kansas School Board?

A: Yes. But, I received no replies until after I posted the website online and the School Board started getting lots of emails about it. You can read some of the responses I received here.

Q: Are you an atheist / heathen / what?

A: I don’t have a problem with religion. What I have a problem with is religion posing as science. Teach Creationism in school, fine, but don’t teach it in a science classroom. And don’t change the definition of science so that you can teach these things. That’s retarded.
Supernatural explanations are by definition not science, so why would you teach them in a science classroom?

Religion, itself, isn’t bad. But it isn’t necessarily good, either. There are plenty of good Christians (and Muslims, and Buddhists, and Hindus), and plenty of bad ones.

Dogma is bad for everyone.

Q: You are making God angry.

A: I doubt it. If there’s a God, and he’s intelligent, then I would guess he has a sense of humor. And how do you know He is NOT a Flying Spaghetti Monster?

Q: Do you make money off this?

A: Yes. The Church makes money off T-shirts, car emblems, book sales, and occasionally donations. We are saving a lot of money and pretty soon here we’ll buy our first Pirate Ship which will serve as a floating church, open to all Believers.

Q: Your graph is messed up.

A: No, it’s not. The X-axis doesn’t have to represent time. And the data points don’t need to be in order. A graph is just a collection of data points, I can display them however I want. It might not be what you’re used to, but it’s not messed up. Please stop writing me emails about it (well over 200 at this point).

Q: There are more pirates now than ever. Look at the South Pacific. And song-downloading pirates, and blah blah blah.

A: Real pirates use swords (cutlasses, actually). Those “pirates” in the south pacific are guys with machine guns, cruising around in power-boats. They’re not pirates. And the song-downloading “pirates” are smelly nerds, and therefore not real pirates.

Q: Your grammar/spelling/etc is bad.

A: Yah.

Q: You’re wrong. It’s actually a linguini / mashed potato / dinosaur / elephant / whatever monster.

A: Maybe He just disguises Himself as those things. Also, you’re not funny.

Q: Can I reprint your letter?

A: Yes. Send me a link, please.

Q: Acceptible use of content?

A: It’s ok with me if you’re using the FSM images/content as long as it’s not for profit, and you’re doing it to further the Cause of the church. I.e. printing out FSM propaganda materials and distributing them is ok (and encouraged). Making FSM t-shirts, selling FSM merchandise, etc. is NOT OK.

Q: What blogging/cms software are you using?

A: The recently redesigned site is built on the Wordpress platform with the K2 template.

Q: How many members are there?

A: I don’t know. There are no membership records as such, so I can only guess based on the amount of traffic the site receives, etc. Traffic to date (September 2006) is somewhere in the vicinity of 350 million hits, and around 15 million unique visitors. Google returns close to 2 million results for the phrase “flying spaghetti monster“. So, who knows - your guess is as good as mine.

Q: Why Pirates?

A: We believe that humans evolved from pirates. Consider that humans share around 95% DNA with monkeys, and more than 99.9% DNA with pirates.

Q: Interview requests

A: I’m happy to answer your questions. I recommend you just send me your questions in an email with a subject that I’ll notice, like “INTERVIEW QUESTIONS”. You don’t need to ask permission or set up an interview for some future time, just send me the questions. Thanks.

Q: Website statistics

A: Somewhere around 10k-40k visitors per day, and somewhere around 500k-1million hits a day. Hits are extremely high because lots of people hotlink images,etc from the site. Which is fine w/me.

Emails - depends, but 50 per day is not uncommon. I have 13,839 unread emails right now (9/25/06). I’ll get to as many as I can.

Q: Why is there an FSM banner on my MySpace profile?

A: It’s a virus/worm that WAS NOT CREATED BY ME. I had nothing to do with it. I’m sorry - it caused everyone a lot of problems, and I do not approve of this sort of thing. You can remove it by following the directions here.

More questions? Ask me below, or email me at bobby.henderson@gmail.com

725 Responses to “Frequently Asked Questions”

Pages: « 14 5 6 7 [8] 9 10 11 1237 » Show All
  1. 141 - November 2nd, 2006 at 12:28 pm - Malc, from Cornwall U.K Says:

    Thank you Pastaman, now I have NO HOPE,

    Just when I thought a nation that thought Baseball interesting, believe that Smackdown and Raw are real, and could put Bush into office not once but twice could sink no lower I discover your website. I am left with no alternative other than believe that there are actually people out there that think you are being serious. We think the Irish are thick and the Germans have no sense of humour but hey c,mon people, get a grip. O.k we have little old ladies that send get well cards to charachters on soaps when they not well but they are harmless and don’t keep invading other countries.
    FSM save us all, God certainly won’t.

    Or are FSM, God and Allah the real Holly Trinity!!!
    What the fuck was that!!!!!!!
    Shit that Lightening Bolt came close!

  2. 142 - November 2nd, 2006 at 12:42 pm - Princess M Says:

    Wow, I think Malc here has taken hate mail to the “HNL.” Not only does he insult our religion, but the country that gave it birth. Is this one of those “your momma” things?

  3. 143 - November 3rd, 2006 at 2:06 pm - Malc, from Cornwall U.K Says:

    Can you translate into English please Princess? What is HNL and your momma things? Us Brits don’t understand! Well I don’t anyway, not that i’m typical. Luv ‘n’ kisses Princess M. Aemrica! Princess? Something not quite right about those 2 words!

  4. 144 - November 4th, 2006 at 1:27 am - Dread Pirate Drew Says:

    To malc, at least he has his opinions of Bush straight, I have to give him props for that on the other hand while on the topic of countries, what is England doing helping Bush?

    Anyways this post is a question about the official religion status of CoftheFSM. Now despite separation of church and state, churches get all sorts of benefits like not paying taxes, or backing up people in conciencious objector (CO) status (like the UU’s). So I was wondering if Prophet Henderson had looked into these possibilities.

    This question occured to me about taxes first, see in Alaska (excellent state that it is) the government is obscenely corrupt, and the largest church in town (Anchorage Baptist Temple) claims a rediculous number of properties for tax exempt status (things like the Janitors house, and the Preachers house with his 14 car garage) this was pointed out by some concerned citizens, when it was denied they threatend legal action, at which time the state passed a new law to make what ABT had been doing legal, and that was that. Ouch. So if CotFSM had religion status we could set up houses of worship all over the country, we need only define what exactly worship was; i think pirate parties on friday nights would be one example, but we need not feel restricted to orthodoxy, I would say Ultimate frisbee might be found appealing by his noodlyness due to the flying object, and flying people with extended limbs (for he is the perfect being, so we should strive to be more like him yes?)

    Second seeking CO status. CO status is not always easy to obtain (Muhammed Ali) but it helps your chances tremendously if you have a history of being a conciencious objector, and you belong to social/family groups of conciencious objectors. Rational moral reasons for not wishing to sew murder and mayhem are acceptable reasons, but your case can be streangthend by religiously reinforced beliefs. The UU’s take letters from their members, archive them, and have an officially religious person write their support of the CO. So I think that everyone who does not want to go killing people when the draft comes back should post to one of these boards declaring themselves a conciencious objector.

    I apologize if I am twisting this faith from its ID roots, but I feel that this faith has so much potential it would really be wasteful (and un-religionlike) to stop at one issue.

    Drew Cason
    (Dread Pirate Drew)

  5. 145 - November 5th, 2006 at 12:34 pm - Ink Says:

    I for one am in agreement with brother Drew. We should try and obtain official religion status. But that is not what I am here to ask about.

    My question concerns the great Noodely One and and his Two Balls. What is the official statement of the CoftheFSM concerning this. Are his noodles and balls three seperate entities or one?

    “In the unity of his Noodelyness there are three Persons, the Noodle, the Polpette, and the Swedish Meatball, these Three Persons being truly distinct from one another. Thus, in the words of the Parmesean Creed: “The Noodle is God, the Polpette is God, and the Swedish Meatball is God, and yet they are not three Flying Spaghetti Monsters, but one Flying Spaghetti Monster.”

    Now this has led me to some curiousity regarding the true nature of the Trinity of the his Noodelyness. Can anyone point out to me whether He is actually three beings or one?

  6. 146 - November 5th, 2006 at 2:29 pm - One Eyed Jack Says:

    Ink,
    .
    Do not ponder the nature of the FSM. We are but simple mortals and cannot know his true nature. Any decent religion understands that knowledge is dangerous. Have some pasta. Be happy. See you at the beer volcano.
    .
    OEJ, aspiring FSM Theologian

  7. 147 - November 5th, 2006 at 2:34 pm - Ink Says:

    Thank you brother Jack. Just this very morning I witnessed the power of the great Noodely One. For as I prepared my breakfast of spaghetti, my roomates came bursting through the door screaming “Free beer!” Truly blessed are his children. RAmen

  8. 148 - November 5th, 2006 at 2:35 pm - Davey Jones' Slacker Says:

    “Trinity” is the delicious black-clad hottie character from the “Matrix” movies, whereas the FSM is the delicious all-powerfully, noodly creator of everything. Hope this helps.

  9. 149 - November 5th, 2006 at 4:30 pm - Penne Says:

    HNL=Horny Nuns Leauge

  10. 150 - November 5th, 2006 at 5:05 pm - Penne Says:

    Here’s a question I frequently ask: What’s the deal with scientology? I’ve gone to lots of sites on it but they are all too long and boring and I’m way too lazy to read them, HELP ME PLEASE!!!!

  11. 151 - November 5th, 2006 at 5:25 pm - Carmen Zepp Says:

    My husband just recently found a site exposing the b.s. behind scientology. Something about how only the enlightened members are allowed to understand how some alien guy (Xenu I think is his name) came to earth, dropped off a buncha people around volcanos, and then he blew them all up. I don’t remember what happens then.

    From what I understand, L. Ron Hubbard started it as a joke, or maybe not as a joke, but tongue in cheek, at least, and then when he realized that people actually took it seriously and that he could make some serious money off of these idiots, well, he just went with it.

    Reckon that means we gotta keep a real close eye on Bobby Henderson, eh?

  12. 152 - November 5th, 2006 at 5:35 pm - Ink Says:

    L Ron Hubbard is actually quoted in saying that the best way to make money in this world would be to start your own religion.

  13. 153 - November 5th, 2006 at 5:42 pm - Carmen Zepp Says:

    What gives with volcanos, do you suppose?

    Bobby, did you take that from Scientology, or is it just a weird coincidence?

  14. 154 - November 5th, 2006 at 10:35 pm - Ink Says:

    Now I have another question, this one posed by a friend of mine.

    We all know that Chef Boyardee is a false profit and therefore is blasphemous to eat a resemblance of his great noodleyness in canned form. But are Spaghetti O’s ok? They technically are not entirely resemblant of his noodlyness.

  15. 155 - November 6th, 2006 at 10:46 am - Dread Pirate Drew Says:

    What do you say we go for official non-profit religious organization status, it doesnt look that hard and I think that the hubub generated if we were granted it would be a most excellent means of spreading the Word. I posted a link in the FAQ section to a guide on setting up your own 501c3

  16. 156 - November 6th, 2006 at 11:05 am - Penne Says:

    WHAT!!! Blowing people up? how is that a good thing? Is this guy also responsible for loosening Tom Cruise’s screws? May the FSM smite his ass with a wet noodle .

  17. 157 - November 6th, 2006 at 11:47 am - Penne Says:

    He seems much better after getting fired though,don’t ya think?

  18. 158 - November 6th, 2006 at 2:11 pm - big Orange Says:

    Dude, if there’s beer volcanoes and stripper factories awaiting me when I’m dead, my soul (or whatever His Noodliness requires of me) is YOURS. Where do i send money?

  19. 159 - November 6th, 2006 at 4:32 pm - Ink Says:

    I am in full support of requesting official non-profit religious organization status. You say you posted the link in the FAQ section? Isn’t that where we are?

  20. 160 - November 6th, 2006 at 10:49 pm - Dread Pirate Drew Says:

    Yeah I screwed up, Its in the comment on open letter section, I was posting to both and got confused. Thanks for the support.

    DP Drew

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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American

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