Last updated 7/2008

Q: Who are you?

A: My name is Bobby Henderson. I’m 27. I grew up in Oregon and move around a lot. I have a physics degree and have successfully avoided a “real” job for years.

Q: Did you really send the Open Letter to the Kansas School Board?

A: Yes. But, I received no replies until after I posted the website online and the School Board started getting lots of emails about it. You can read some of the responses I received here.

Q: Are you an atheist / heathen / what?

A: I don’t have a problem with religion. What I have a problem with is religion posing as science. Teach Creationism in school, fine, but don’t teach it in a science classroom. And don’t change the definition of science so that you can teach these things. That’s retarded.
Supernatural explanations are by definition not science, so why would you teach them in a science classroom?

Religion, itself, isn’t bad. But it isn’t necessarily good, either. There are plenty of good Christians (and Muslims, and Buddhists, and Hindus), and plenty of bad ones.

Dogma is bad for everyone.

Q: You are making God angry.

A: I doubt it. If there’s a God, and he’s intelligent, then I would guess he has a sense of humor. And how do you know He is NOT a Flying Spaghetti Monster?

Q: Do you make money off this?

A: Yes. The Church makes money off T-shirts, car emblems, book sales, and occasionally donations. We are saving a lot of money and pretty soon here we’ll buy our first Pirate Ship which will serve as a floating church, open to all Believers.

Q: Your graph is messed up.

A: No, it’s not. The X-axis doesn’t have to represent time. And the data points don’t need to be in order. A graph is just a collection of data points, I can display them however I want. It might not be what you’re used to, but it’s not messed up. Please stop writing me emails about it (well over 200 at this point).

Q: There are more pirates now than ever. Look at the South Pacific. And song-downloading pirates, and blah blah blah.

A: Real pirates use swords (cutlasses, actually). Those “pirates” in the south pacific are guys with machine guns, cruising around in power-boats. They’re not pirates. And the song-downloading “pirates” are smelly nerds, and therefore not real pirates.

Q: Your grammar/spelling/etc is bad.

A: Yah.

Q: You’re wrong. It’s actually a linguini / mashed potato / dinosaur / elephant / whatever monster.

A: Maybe He just disguises Himself as those things. Also, you’re not funny.

Q: Can I reprint your letter?

A: Yes. Send me a link, please.

Q: Acceptible use of content?

A: It’s ok with me if you’re using the FSM images/content as long as it’s not for profit, and you’re doing it to further the Cause of the church. I.e. printing out FSM propaganda materials and distributing them is ok (and encouraged). Making FSM t-shirts, selling FSM merchandise, etc. is NOT OK.

Q: What blogging/cms software are you using?

A: The recently redesigned site is built on the Wordpress platform with the K2 template.

Q: How many members are there?

A: I don’t know. There are no membership records as such, so I can only guess based on the amount of traffic the site receives, etc. Traffic to date (September 2006) is somewhere in the vicinity of 350 million hits, and around 15 million unique visitors. Google returns close to 2 million results for the phrase “flying spaghetti monster“. So, who knows - your guess is as good as mine.

Q: Why Pirates?

A: We believe that humans evolved from pirates. Consider that humans share around 95% DNA with monkeys, and more than 99.9% DNA with pirates.

Q: Interview requests

A: I’m happy to answer your questions. I recommend you just send me your questions in an email with a subject that I’ll notice, like “INTERVIEW QUESTIONS”. You don’t need to ask permission or set up an interview for some future time, just send me the questions. Thanks.

Q: Website statistics

A: Somewhere around 10k-40k visitors per day, and somewhere around 500k-1million hits a day. Hits are extremely high because lots of people hotlink images,etc from the site. Which is fine w/me.

Emails - depends, but 50 per day is not uncommon. I have 13,839 unread emails right now (9/25/06). I’ll get to as many as I can.

Q: Why is there an FSM banner on my MySpace profile?

A: It’s a virus/worm that WAS NOT CREATED BY ME. I had nothing to do with it. I’m sorry - it caused everyone a lot of problems, and I do not approve of this sort of thing. You can remove it by following the directions here.

More questions? Ask me below, or email me at bobby.henderson@gmail.com

747 Responses to “Frequently Asked Questions”

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  1. 341 - January 18th, 2007 at - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Says:

    Rodger tempting though your suggestion is, it would break one of the ‘I’d really rather you didn’t’s.

    So we just poke fun at them instead.
    The fact is they are such a bunch of wusses they wouldn’t drink the beer or ejoy the strippers anyway so why save them? They won’t thank you for it.

  2. 342 - January 18th, 2007 at - Jean Bart Says:

    You all probably know this, but cruxifixion wasn’t for religion related crimes, but for crimes against the Roman Imperium. Otherwise he would have been judged by priests, and stoned. He died the “terrorists’” way…

  3. 343 - January 18th, 2007 at - Jean Bart Says:

    Oops, that be “cruCifixion”… aaaargh!

  4. 344 - January 18th, 2007 at - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Says:

    i EFFING H8 NOODLES @ Jan 16th, 2007 at 3:30 am said:

    Noodly shit dick piss
    Are you all complete retards or is this some funny joke
    how the fuck can and noodle doodle twat face be god
    REJECTS
    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    You must be sooooooo sad to believe this shit

    I don’ know why but that cracks me up.
    The phrase ‘noodle doodle twat face’ is my favourite phrase of the week.

  5. 345 - January 18th, 2007 at - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Says:

    Jesus was a terrorist. The Christians kept that quiet.

  6. 346 - January 18th, 2007 at - Wench Nikkiee Says:

    Apologies for my consistent misspelling and typos, guys. Trying to contribute 2 cents worth, in the middle of attempting to get some work finished. Promise to start using spell check.
    RAmen

  7. 347 - January 18th, 2007 at - Re-Oared Marc Says:

    I think that Noodle Doodle Twat Face was a Muppet.

  8. 348 - January 20th, 2007 at - Boo Says:

    dear Bobby,
    Thanks mate! refreshing and important…
    You could well go down in the history books (well you have already) just don’t let it go to your head, when the fundamentalist spaghetti worshipers have thier fill of blind stupidity and launch violent attacks on stupid people, it will be your name they fight under.
    “follow the gourd… no the sandle, follow the sandle… we are all individuals… i’m not!”
    With great power comes great responsibility… Good luck and thank you! xx

  9. 349 - January 20th, 2007 at - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Says:

    Boo,

    Did you see “Mock The Week” this week?
    The subject was ‘things you won’t find in the Bible’ and one of the contestants started with “He’s not the messiah…” and the whole audience finished with a chorus of “…He’s a very naughty boy”.

    Priceless.

  10. 350 - January 20th, 2007 at - Steve Says:

    Hello There!

    I read some of your letter to the Kansas School Board. I wondering where I could find some of your sacred texts you referred to in these quotes:

    “We have evidence that a Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe. None of us, of course, were around to see it, but we have written accounts of it. We have several lengthy volumes explaining all details of His power.”

    “We have numerous texts that describe in detail how this can be possible and the reasons why He does this.”

    Also, I would like to see your raw data used to graph #of pirates vs. Global Average Temperature.

    Your paper was not properly referenced by any accounts, but I’m sure it was an honest mistake.

    Cheers!

    Steve

  11. 351 - January 20th, 2007 at - Alchemist Says:

    Hi Steve. Read the bloody letter and the FAQs before posting.
    Cheers!
    Alchemist

  12. 352 - January 21st, 2007 at - Jill Says:

    Thank you for giving me something to believe in =)

  13. 353 - January 21st, 2007 at - Peter Popoff Says:

    Welcome Jill.
    May you be forever touched.
    Ramen

  14. 354 - January 21st, 2007 at - Thumper Says:

    @Jill
    “Thank you for giving me something to believe in =)”
    It’s not real Jill…there is no FSM and no such thing as monsters…mostly…

  15. 355 - January 22nd, 2007 at - Booty Says:

    You’ll be telling her there is no Santa or Tooth Fairy next! Bugger off!

  16. 356 - January 22nd, 2007 at - Red DutchPasta Kidd Says:

    Thumper
    Jan 21st, 2007 at 11:22 pm
    @Jill
    “Thank you for giving me something to believe in =)”
    It’s not real Jill…there is no FSM and no such thing as monsters…mostly…
    *
    Aren’t you living proof of the opposite?

  17. 357 - January 25th, 2007 at - And Then I Saw His Balls, Now I'm A Believer! Says:

    This is the best religion ever! I always thought all religion was some bullcrap, made up by fanatics who wanted to control people, but now i know better! :D

    RAmen to the understanders

  18. 358 - January 26th, 2007 at - Back in Kansas Says:

    Elmon, Xaos, and other later folks: you do NOT have to swear on the Bible. You have to either take an oath “so help me God” (which could be on a Bible but I don’t think they usually have one, you just raise your right hand) or make an affirmation like “I affirm that I will tell the truth, under penalty of perjury.” You just have to say something that makes it clear that you understand the seriousness of it and you really do intend to be truthful. At least, that’s under the (United States) Federal Rules of Evidence. States can make their own rules to some extent. I don’t know any details about what they permit, but if they went too far in requiring religious statements they would have First Amendment problems.

    So as far as I know (I’m just a student, get a real lawyer if this is important to you) there should be no reason why a Pastafarian can’t either swear on the Gospel of the FSM, or simply make an affirmation, as long as it’s clear he or she takes it seriously. But I think you might want to bring your own GFSM if you want to swear on it — I doubt most bailiffs keep a copy of it around.

    Ramen.

  19. 359 - January 30th, 2007 at - arKaeologist Says:

    I have been touched….

  20. 360 - February 1st, 2007 at - Mike Says:

    I’m very interested in the feild of pastafarianism. I think I’m gunna convert.

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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American




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