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I spent a while thinking (hate-mail)

Published June 14th, 2011 by Bobby Henderson

I spent a while thinking of a good reply to this, without sounding like some sort of inbred hick or perhaps maybe to get your attention. However, I realize that there pretty much is no way for that to happen, if you put this in your hate-mail section, I’ll probably be mocked just as much as the next guy, who put the stupid comment about how you could never buy a pirate ship. I’m OK with that, I just wish people will actually think about what I have to say rather then ignorantly mocking what I believe personally. Whatever may happen, I don’t really mind, except that I cannot bring myself to be silent on this issue.

I am a Christian, whatever you may think about me, or absurd assumptions you may have about what I look like, think like, or speak like, realize this, I think all beliefs should be treated with equality. Atheism, Hindu, Buddhist, Christian, Muslim, Agonist, Voodoo, whatever, I don’t care, if you believe that you are correct, then you have every right in the world to believe that with all your heart, and nobody should force you to believe what they believe. Now I also believe in open criticism of any of these religions, meaning your Pastafarian view that openly mocks religion. However, it is also my right to criticize the criticism, meaning though while I believe it is your right to mock, harass, and generally make religious persons miserable, I don’t believe it is morally right.

Atheism is a belief just as much as Christianity. Say whatever you want about facts and how religion is stupid and all those who practice it are all idiots, but it still comes down to the fundamental truth that you must believe this to be more true over the other option. I am again, completely fine with that, and that is why I love America so much, because we CAN believe differently then one another, and still live peacefully (to a degree) together. However, mocking is not the right way to go about arguing your belief.
By the way, here is the definition of mocking:

1. Tease or laugh at in a scornful or contemptuous manner.

2. Make (something) seem laughably unreal or impossible.

To laugh at someone else’s belief that they dedicate their lives to is not funny or humorous, but I believe is rather childish and immature. This is the main reason why I would much rather sit down calmly with an atheist and have a rational discussion about each other’s beliefs, instead of smacking them in the face with a bible, and shouting how they are going to hell for not believing the undeniable truth that is the bible, or worse, calling their belief idiotic and getting my group of friends together and laughing and pointing in his face.

Of course there are people that do this, hence, you, and there will always be people like you. My job is try to convince you to be rational and discuss each others view points.

I could never put myself in your mindset and read this the same way through your eyes. To you, I just look like another idiot who took this seriously and decided to write a concerned letter and waste his time trying to teach you to be respectful, but the truth is, writing this helps me put my thoughts in order anyways.

If you do have one ounce of thought for my beliefs, at least view this letter with respect, and try to think about what I am thinking when I read this:

http://www.globalone.tv/forum/topics/student-punished-for-spaghetti?groupUrl=flyingspaghettimonster

What I am thinking is that the joke has gone to far. Of course this letter asks for intelligent discussion, and that seems to have never existed in your website, so before I go, let my put it in your language.

Fuck you, and lay off religion asshole.

Sincerely,
Austin



1,844 Responses to “I spent a while thinking (hate-mail)”

  1. Sage Alfredo-Fusili says:

    I believe that if religions were to go to war… Such as we have it seems… That it is not a matter of who is right and who is wrong… It is a matter of who is willing to shed first blood…
    Like a fight for dominance… He who is most bull headed has the dullest horns, And he who watches and conspires… Has the sharpest horns and the bigger meatballs… Let us writhe in their ignorance if we wish to bring but more war and destruction… For sometimes the blind eye… Bares the sharper image… They wish to deliver us from our “sin” but what sin is to be had? They lack the perspective to see our thoughts, like overcooked lasagna we must become tough and stand firm. For there are the little meats and matrianara to think about, to protect… What might we do if they choose to join the opposition? we must let them. But we cannot have them being assaulted or apeppered into such ways… You have to stand firm… For the everlasting pasta awaits
    Now i ask for my fellow pastafarians to join together in perfect harmony and pray…
    “For we hath been touched by the noodly appendage, brought into such a light by his noodlyness… Who hath woven the universe in his form, planets as meatballs, spinning around the sun of a fork on the plate of the universe… I ask, how many must cry before parmageddon… And so shall we all last in eternal pasta… Pastamen.”

    • Keith says:

      Ramen to that.

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  5. Joshua Lytle says:

    You know, I was reading this and I thought to myself “Wow. This is actually an intelligent, reasonable person that I feel that I would like to meet and sit down with, and have an actual, gentlemanly discussion about the finer points of religious views and how society treats them with respect to freedom of expression.” Then you had to go and ruin it by summarizing your thoughts with base profanity and bad-mouthing. For the betterment of any future posts on the topic that you may write, I have a small piece of advice: You undermine your own efforts with vulgarity.

  6. Arthur says:

    So fun how I was thinking “finally a rational christian” and then you had to go and ruin it with vulgarity.

    I personally am against militant atheism as in forcing others to accept my points of view. If you want to believe in and worship an evidently insane magic man that sees everything but doesn’t do a thing to help the millions of humans suffering everyday then you’re totally free to do so. But I don’t appreciate being forced to recite your pledges or having to see your monuments in public buildings, please keep your preaching to yourself.

    I like the fact the FSM stand against those forms of oppression.

  7. EhEhRon says:

    It was a refreshing Christian point of view that you exhibited in your entire rebuttal up until the “fuck you” comment; that just ruined every thing you built up. It seems you turned the other cheek only to fart in the direction of your opposition.

    I was pretty much raised Pentecostal Christian and have since turned to Agnosticism and have felt more at peace with existence ever since. 20 years later, I stumble across this FSM religion and find this all absolutely brilliant!

    I’m a huge fan of satire and can see how people would find this offensive; at the same time, it’s a breath of fresh air to dogmatic/religiously oppressed individuals, such as myself. Granted, I have no intentions of joining this religion, it’s just refreshing to see that something like this exists.

    I respect everyone’s religion, spirituality, ethnicity, upbringing… Basically, I’m not going to go out of my way to change someone’s mind about how they think, live or pray; that’s on them. If in conversation with someone that has different ideals than me, I’ll simply speak my opinions, my experiences and my own personal reasons for choosing the life I live and listen to theirs; makes for good discussion and reflection.

    I think the idea of using a satirical deity to get this message across and to stir discussion, at the cost of being offensive to the close minded religious zealots, is outstanding.

  8. Pastafarian Zealot says:

    The FSM a ‘satirical deity’? There is as much evidence for His existence as any other god.

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