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Certificates of Ordination

Published May 9th, 2011 by Bobby Henderson

Update — The ordination certificates have been redesigned

Ordination certificates are just $20 and include domestic shipping. $30 for international. Check out more photos on the order page here.



167 Responses to “Certificates of Ordination”

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  1. Olivier says:

    Hi Bobby,

    I really like the ordination credentials. However, I have a question: is the Church of the FSM at long last incorportated as a church, meaning that we can legally perform mariages, or are the credentials just a gimmick?

    Also, as you probably know, many pastafarians live outside the US. I myself preach in Paris, France. Consequently, and although your glass framing is very nice, it’s going to be both very expensive to ship outside the US and it will also add a substantial risk of the glass breaking during shipment.

    I personally don’t have a problem with paying your asking price for a paper only version that I could have framed locally to save on shipping, but I’d suggest a 20$ (ish) price for the paper only version.

    Please get back to me on this so that I can place my order.

    Cheers from Paris!

    Olivier

    • Derrick says:

      I’ve been a follower of FSM for years. Even lucky enough to have swapped emails with this wholy noodly prophet Bobby himself.

      I will proudly display my ordination credentials for all to see in my home :) I also spread the word through “I am a Pastafarian” with FSM plate holder and MHNATU license.

      Derrick
      MHNATU.

    • Shane says:

      I ordered my “Certificate of Ordination” a few weeks ago and I was wondering what the world record for Pastafarian marriages at one time was at the moment? Also Pastafarian, marriage vows, I’m a former Marine and come from several thousand years of military and explorers (actually related to a Pirate) but I want to check if I need to add anything?

      • Keith says:

        If you are related to a pirate you are automatically ordained in my opinion.

    • Derrick says:

      Got my certificate in the mail yesterday. Absolutely beautiful. However hard the USPS attempted to break it their attempts failed. A nuclear blast is about the only thing that could get through that packing. Came through spotless and in perfect condition. The little black packing border did its job and took a little beating. It sure had me worried because it looks like part of the certificate.

      I have it proudly displayed in the entrance of my house and is the first thing anyone will see when them come in. (ok second, my St. Bernard tends to make his presence known pretty quickly).

      A proud Pastafarian minister.

  2. Randy says:

    Is this important holy document available in the long-form version? One never knows when they will need to prove to a teabagger their loyalty to His Noodlyess.

    • opiesysco says:

      Why would you bring Politics into this wonderful celebration?
      Though it is funny, we should not taint this celebration with politics.

      • Kwilliams says:

        I assume the “why would you bring politics into this wonderful celebration?” comment is pure sarcasm?

        • opiesysco says:

          Of course.

  3. Hippie Pirate says:

    I think it should be noted that the $46 doesn’t buy you the credentials, but rather just pays for the rigorous training process that one must go through in order to become an ordained minister of His Noodliness.

    • SauceCowboy says:

      But just what, pray tell, constitues the rigorous training? Do I have to learn the names of all the various forms of pasta? Do I have to sing “On Top of Spaghetti”? Do I have to understand the meaning of the universe by contemplating a meatball? I think it would be great if it included spelling tests. I get rather annoyed by messages that are full of misspelings.

  4. Encyclodpedia Brit says:

    I totally want one. Especially if it means I can actually perform rituals and stuff.

    • Wayne says:

      What type of rituals do you want to perform that require a certificate like this?

  5. Ray says:

    If the Universal Life Church can ordain, so should the FSM Church. Maybe look into how the ULC does it.
    Also, I would prefer a paper version too to have framed myself so that it would match the framing of my degrees and so on. Just some thoughts.

  6. Qwertyuiopasd says:

    Yeah, is this official in any capacity? That is, short of laughing at the name, if someone brought this to a judge and said “I’m an ordained minister, may I have a license to perform marriages?” would it be legally recognized or not?

    I definitely think we should set something up where we can do that, hopefully there’s no expense involved. ULC does it, so I can’t imagine it’s that difficult.

    Alternatively, if the Church of the FSM never gives us a true opportunity to be ordained like ULC does, one could always just get a ULC ordination, then preach as a Pastafarian Minister, and be legally able to perform weddings.

    It’d be more awesome if we could do it through our own church, though.

    • wulff says:

      A pagan I know told me that here in Illinois, you only need to convince the parties involved that you are authorized to do it for it to be legal.

    • tekHedd says:

      “…one could always just get a ULC ordination, then preach as a Pastafarian Minister,..”

      Once again I am awed at His foresight at not making FSM mutually exclusive with other faiths.

    • Pesto says:

      Great idea. I was ordained by ULC a long time ago, but have become very fond of the Pastafarian way.

    • raviolution says:

      so just how would a ceremony cunducted by an FSM minister be worded anyway?

  7. Big Guy says:

    A tax right off OMG

    • Atsap Revol says:

      Did you mean WRITE OFF?

      Sevol Angasal

      • Big Guy says:

        @ pasta lover

        I knew you pick this up after I sent it.

        Yes it’s a big insulting joke when a mickey mouse church like this one can be eligible for tax write off’s or be ordained for that matter. This reveals that our politically correct society has gone to far accepting every crazy notion voice or complaint that comes down the pike.

        Point of interest: it’s become painfully obvious the pc world we live in has provided a venue for every sick thought while restricting established religious practices. An example is no more Christmas trees or Christmas greetings or GOD in our schools and public buildings. Sad sign of the times. But fear not everything will change shortly, Jesus is en-route, salvation is at hand. Make the choice to save yourself.

        • Brian Fritzen says:

          Here are a few of those questions you claim you answered but really didn’t:

          Do you know anything about Christianity?

          Have you clicked on the ABOUT tab and read about this site?

          Which one christian true church is the right one?

        • Pesto says:

          What insane asylum did you say you reside in?

        • puppygoogoo says:

          @ Big Guy,

          Is this what you meant?

          Yes it’s a big insulting joke when a christian church like your one can be eligible for tax write off’s or be ordained for that matter. This reveals that our politically correct society has gone to far accepting every crazy notion voice or complaint that comes down the pike.

          Point of interest: it’s become painfully obvious the pc world we live in has provided a venue for every sick thought while restricting established religious practices. An example is no more Beer volcanoes or stripper factories or FSMin our schools and public buildings. Sad sign of the times. But fear not everything will change shortly, FSM is en-route, salvation is at hand. Make the choice to save yourself.

          puppygoogoo

        • Mike says:

          Write offs, not write off’s. Third time lucky.

        • evo4life says:

          the jokes on you Big Boy….thats all i got!

        • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

          Brian Fritzen asked “Which one christian true church is the right one?” in response to Big Goof’s latest complaint. I say it’s the one mentioning Christmas trees in their BuyBull. That way, BG, it won’t be a rip-off of some pagan practice. Like say “Easter” a Germanic mother-nature-like goddess who symbolized rebirth (get it? Resurrection?) and ruled over the bunnies.

        • opiesysco says:

          Dude, you are such an assclown.
          No god in schools was started by the christians.
          Christians stole the xmas tree idea from the pagans, just like every other festive holiday.

          BTW: Is jeebus comming on the 21st? I cant wait to give him a peice of my mind. He never showed up in 1994. But, better late than never, right?

        • don says:

          The world is suppossed to end on May 21st, I think, according to some nutcase who has figuered out the bible code correctly this time, after missing the date before. Or maybe the Mayans are going to be right on 12/21/2012? No matter what though, I know that I’ll be with my “Savour” in heaven, feasting on his tasty balls and appendeges and enjoying the beer volcano and strippers!!!!
          The world has gone downhill since they took pirates out of the public schools, and people routinley fail to observe the weekend as a holy time. Sad sign of the times. This pc world has outlawed established religious practices, like slavery, child eating, and polygomy, but fear not, everything will change shortly, for the FSM is en-route, salivation is at hand. Make the choice to salivate yourself! DO IT TODAY!!!!

        • raviolution says:

          he never showed up for Hale-Bopp either. i cant believe i castrated myself for nothing!!

      • Brian Fritzen says:

        Must be that 140 IQ….

    • G. Lweigamnik says:

      You’re no fun, Gib Yug.

      • Big Guy says:

        I can be…

        • Rev Toni Rigatoni says:

          Bet you can’t!

    • tekHedd says:

      He’s right! Being a church is a huge tax write-off, even if your gods are false and you do no good for the community whatsoever. Some of these benefits extend to the “leaders” of those organizations, even if they don’t believe what they are teaching.

      Satire is wasted on some people.

  8. Big Guy says:

    @ Brian Fritzen

    The right Christian church for you can be confusing I agree. But please keep in mind they are all members of one Christian faith fraternity. The holy trinity God the father his son Jesus & the holy spirit. It was man who separated the original church into separate sects for his own selfish reasons. Divorce disagreements in philosophy etc.. I realize this sounds a bit schizophrenic or even self destructive in nature but through it all Christendom has revealed only one singular leader. Conversely the Jews who believe everything Christians belief with one exception Jesus has yet to return for the first time. Upon further examination the two are not that far apart at all prophecy revealed in both is prophecy fulfilled in both. It’s just a matter of timing and accepting they allowed Jesus to be handed over and crucified by the Romans.
    Complete prophecy can not be fulfilled unless Jesus comes back to save the world from the Anti Christ which I believe is the 12th Imam. Keep your eyes on the sky…

    • Brian Fritzen says:

      That still isn’t the teaching of any one Christian faith. The teachings of Christian faith all claim to be the one path. Catholics, Mormons, Amish, JWs, Born Agains…. they all claim the same thing. What you are tap dancing around is an answer.

      There is nothing wrong with stating: I don’t know, no one really does. Which is akin to what you have said. Or, there is no one true church. Both are answers, neither are accepted by Christian preachers.

      My follow up question, to all people who answer my first the same way you have is this:

      How do you know what you know? How do you know what you know about Christianity and the only path to heaven based on your experiences? How would what you know change based on geographical location? Had you lived in Iraq per se, would you be born again Christian or would you believe in Allah? Had you been born in Japan, would you follow the path of Shinto? In China, would you follow the Dao or Confucious, or Buddha? In Finland, you would most likely be atheist and realize that you are responsible for your own actions and life, that you can’t “give yourself up” to a higher power because your choices are yours alone.

    • tekHedd says:

      Upvoted for interacting like an adult!

      I don’t believe as you do, but when/if Jesus returns I’ll gladly admit I was wrong. However, I’ll be expecting him to explain in great detail why he couldn’t leave us some sort of easy-to-believe explanation for why he had to be wait 20 centuries.

      I suspect that Jesus spoke truth when he said that the Rapture would happen within the lifetime of those present, and all true Christians were swept up to heaven 2000 years ago. We have always lived in the end times, we were born in them, and we will die in them. The train has left the station! Time to talk to the ticket agent about choosing another flight.

      OTOH, if the rapture happens on the 21st as predicted, there will be a Rapture after-party at my place. All are invited. If I am unable to attend it will be a surprise to me too. :)

      • tekHedd says:

        (Train, flight, what’s the difference, really? :) )

    • Midnight Rider says:

      All members of the Christian faith fraternity just like http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ho_No_Hana is part of the Christian fraternity.

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