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You sicken me

Published April 16th, 2011 by Bobby Henderson

You sicken me with the fact that you now have my best friend believing in your stupid, sick, blasphemous crap you call a religion! I can tell you what it really is, BLASPHEMOUS, MADE DURING A DRUG BINGE, IDOLATRY THAT WILL HAVE YOU BURNING IN HELL OR ON THE TABLE AFTER THE LAST WAR!!!! I am furious about the fact that there is a religion DEVOTED to SIN OF ALL THINGS! If you don’t change you and all your followers will be in a special place in hell just for IDOL WORSHIPPING, SIN LOVERS LIKE YOURSELF!!! You disgust me and I hope you see the truth before it’s too late.

Antipastifarian,

Chance

I need more information on this “special place” in hell you refer to – will there be cake? 

Interested,

-bobby



2,132 Responses to “You sicken me”

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  1. Pastor Francesco Arrian says:

    I have a dream.
    I have a dream that one day we may be free of all cured meats, olives, peperoncini, mushrooms, anchovies, artichoke hearts, provolone, mozzarella, pickled meats and vegetables (both in oil or in vinegar). Free. Free of Antipastafarianism.

  2. Bill Vanaver says:

    I’m officially founding the “Anti Hat Rack” Religion. What if we chose to not believe in anything at all? Metaphors, logic & convenient “rules of thumb” would be fine, but what would life be like if we didn’t believe literally in any of it, including science (I’m not referring to scientific method, just to “scientism” – as in believing that science is our salvation) politics, heroes, food groups, pyramid schemes, movements, psychological modalities, etc. I guess then a good symbol might be a hat rack which is “X’d” out. We could still have deep insights from religious practice, etc., but as methods rather than beliefs. Pema Chodron writes about this possibility in her book “Comfortable With Uncertainty.” Not that I’m necessarily up to the task….

  3. Tom says:

    What I love most about this is this line:
    “I am furious about the fact that there is a religion DEVOTED to SIN OF ALL THINGS!”
    Do they understand that without the belief in their “Christian God”, we have no real concept of ‘sin’. Also, did they not realise that there is a “religion devoted to sin” called Satanism?

    • TheFewTheProudTheMarinara says:

      If Chance is so opposed to “idol worshiping” I suggest he start by blowing up all the Madonna statues he sees in people’s front yards.

      • Holly Jahangiri says:

        Then where will the violence end? Next, they’ll be blowing up Big Boy statues in front of burger joints. Or Lady Gaga statues in – wait, are there any of those?

        • TheFewTheProudTheMarinara says:

          Perhaps the producers of “American Idol” should get a restraining order.

  4. Studley Goodpasta says:

    Woo woo. All aboard the hell express. “There’s a train a’comin’!! Poor Chance. Methinks we’ll all be meeting up again down below for beer and nibbles! Who, I say, who, can meet the strict criteria required for safe passage upstairs? Suggested reading – The Year Of Living Biblically by AJ Jacobs.

    RAmen

    Studley.

  5. Studley Goodpasta says:

    Let him, who is without sin, cast the first meatball…….

  6. Rev. Mike says:

    Reverend M P,

    Not a better quote could have been cited. I judge not others as To their beliefs but as to there actions. I’m not sure as to what the end will hold but should there be atolmennt for what we have done, I for one would look back and say I would not have changed a thing. If we to take all religions as truth and fact then heaven would be empty as al so all religions say believe as I do or go to hell.

    If the all powerful being is going to fault me and condem me for a few mistakes then it is not the kind and forgiving being that is written about and I’ll have no part of it.

    To quote from his noodliness

    I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Build multi million-Dollar Churches/Temples/Mosques/ Shrines To My Noodly Goodness When The Money Could Be Better Spent (Take Your Pick): A. Ending Poverty B. Curing Diseases C. Living In Peace, Loving With Passion, And Lowering The Cost Of Cable. I Might Be A Complex Carbohydrate Omniscient Being, But I Enjoy The Simple Things In Life. I Ought To Know. I AM The Creator.

    I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjugate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Don’t Require Sacrifices, And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.

    I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk, Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This Through You Thick Heads: Woman=Person, Man=Person. Samey-Samey. One is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We’re Talking About Fashion And I’m Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal And Fuchsia

    Words to live by.

    Yours truly,

    Rev. Mike

  7. Daniel Løvbrøtte Olsen says:

    I wonder how many times we have to explain that threatening with hell won’t work as we don’t believe it exist…

  8. Rosi says:

    “If you don’t change you and all your followers will be in a special place in hell just for IDOL WORSHIPPING, SIN LOVERS LIKE YOURSELF!!! You disgust me and I hope you see the truth before it’s too late.” It sounds to me like Chance is worshipping himself!!

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