most fucking pathetic excuse for a religion

Published June 12th, 2010 by Bobby Henderson

The Flying Spaghetti Monster is the most fucking pathetic excuse for a religion. Bullshit, a bowl of fucking food created you? It doesn’t even have a fucking brain! Ha ha. I can’t believe how much you are offending me, and many others. Especially your FSM "Bible". Why did you have to make fun of my religion, and others? You called the Christian bible The New Testicle. Seriously, stop making fun of other religions. Also, you called the Hindu’s book, "Ten Little Indians". Okay, you are the most twisted, racist fucking bastard on the planet. I can’t believe you are a racist bastard. Why, do you have to make fun of other religions? Probably because you want to just kick back and laugh at other people, and bash them. That’s why. Also, in your queer FSM "Bible", you obiously had to make fun of the Jews. I’m very offended, because the Jews had probably had the roughest life, and you go ahead and make fun of the REAL Bible, not your bullshit bible!!! Your version of heaven sucks huge fucking dicks. I don’t want strippers, and beer is nasty as fuck. You aren’t even trying, and your version of Hell is the most retarded thing I’ve ever heard of. When you’re already DEAD it doesn’t FUCKING MATTER  IF YOU GET AN STD OR NOT!!!!! Fuck you sir, don’t be suprised when you die if you burn in Hell, because I am a solid Christian and I am praying for you, and I really hate that you have to MOCK other religions. You are very racist, and I hope that you burn in Hell and realize your FSM is just your imagination, and you’re full of bullshit. Also, I feel like sueing the publishers of your FSM Bible, since you have gone that far and turned racist.

Don’t be suprised if you get sued for being a RACIST FUCKING DOUCHEBAG! AND YOU CALL YOUR RELIGION "PEACEFUL"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck you,
Mike



1,174 Responses to “most fucking pathetic excuse for a religion”

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  1. Spazzy says:

    I see someone who assumes things on the wrong hand here.
    This was not to make fun of other religions. Think outside the box, have an imagination, have a sense of humor.
    I am also a christian and I find this joke to be pretty funny. It’s what PARODIES are for. Now, go outside, smell the fresh daisies, grow a sense of humor, and then come back and rant. M’kay?

    Have a nice day.

  2. MS says:

    Dude, that is pathetic, if anything i am atheist but this is obviously not to offend anybody. Bobby is trying to prove a point that if you want to be taught intelligent design, go to a religous school, if you wish to be taught evolution, go somewhere else. People should lay off this guy and with all of the profanity in some hate mail, u say I am a solid christian and I curse like a f__king rap song

  3. Tasm10 says:

    Hi guys,

    Ooooh! Look, the “solid christian” is defending the Jews and other races too! Wait a second didn’t Christianity abuse, mock and segregate Jews for at least a thousend years? Didn’t Christianity beleive for a long time that all other religions were inferior to Christianity and persecute those foreigners who did not follow the Christian way of life? What next, homesexuality is now OK! Don’t you dare try and take the moral high road there because you don’t have the right after all the suffering that Christianity has caused in that respect. Also in England we have this thing called a free media where one can criticise what we like (within reason), I’m pretty sure the US has it too, being “The Land of the Free” afterall. Also, prove that your God isn’t imaginary either, oh wait sorry- you can’t. And what right do you have to say that “And you call your religion peaceful!”(I’ve just touched up on the pathetic grammar for “pleasant” reading). How are we not peaceful? Have we killed anyone? Tortured, exiled and burnt alive anyone? Perhaps you are ashamed of the things that your religion has done, the horrific crimes it has commited? You should be, you pathetic excuse for a human being and you can shove your prayers “up where the sun don’t shine”- I don’t need them.

    R’Amen all,
    Tasm10

  4. Tasm10 says:

    Sorry about typo “beleive”…

  5. Craig says:

    I’m confused… Does Mike want Bobby to get fucked and burn in hell or is he praying for him? Can you want to do both? And what do you call Indians other than Indians? A whole lot of Christians have thought up more racist names than that.

    • Mal says:

      Craig, welcome to the socio-philosophical monkey house that is Christian fundamentalism. Their rules don’t apply to them, just everyone else. Bigoted statements like the ones made by Mike can only be handed down from religious pedestals, but they absolutely cannot go in the other direction. This is also true of challenges to religious beliefs.

      • nun s equator says:

        mal, an interesting explanation about how the whole thing works. ..as opposed 2 my mind, which is more like a sieve or possibly cheesecloth…things leak out readily & with fair warning, but sometimes if i leave it submerged, stuff stays put 4 periods of time (involving the leaking backwards u feel does not occur, elsewhere); i m thinking if i use a plastic baggie of some kind maybe this could help. nothing else has worked very well 2 date.

    • nun s equator says:

      ‘does mike want bobby 2 get f-d & burn in hell, or is he praying 4 him?’

      maybe if he doesnt damn him 2 hell, 1st & deem him f-d, there is not a valid enough reason 2 pray 4 him?

      lol…

      • nun s equator says:

        Or, he could feel he is headed there (hell) himSELF & secretly desires Bobby there, 4 company…take ur pick.

        • Danny says:

          Probably both, plus needing to feel superior, of course.

        • nun s equator says:

          well then, this makes me feel a member of an inferior human race…id rather we elevate 1 another. ..rather, but this not always translate 2 action…i could c if bobby had wronged the guy in some way, a swift go 2 directive could b an expected & warranted response, just probably ineffectual…as far as what ive seen, relegating people 2 bowels of urth does not seem 2 create desired results, that is more the jurisdiction of people (supernatural invectives aside), involved.

  6. nun s equator says:

    that was thoughtful of mike 2 b offended on ‘behalf’ of jews, everywhere tho, i must say.
    @ least he was being thoughtful.sticking up 4 those he sees as maligned is better than saying f u…but saying that, how does he know who his audience is (what if the person he is sending this letter 2 happens 2 have been raised steeped in jewish tradition…not presuming, just saying? because then he would b contradicting self?) oy vey. I m in far 2 much pain 2 b poking @ these keys. please do not wish 4 more hate mail 2 come your way…mayb u have converted all naysayers 2 ur way of thinking & the lack of mail= a ‘blessing’…

  7. Kid Northcote says:

    Mike! How’s that quote for the Pirate Vessel coming? C’mon, I’m buyin! 5% commission!

  8. that guy says:

    how is a religion a race? last time i checked religion can be embraced by anyone, not limited by race. you sir are the racist bastard. SO BITE MY WEENER

    • Mal says:

      Oh but religion cannot be embraced by just anyone. You have to be a brainless, spineless, hypocritical douche-nozzle who thinks he or she is better than everyone else and is therefore in a position to judge them.

      As far as the race thing goes, I don’t know where that’s coming from.

      • tekhedd says:

        I’m a devout follower of the FSM and I’m not entirely spineless! Does this mean I was never a true believer?

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