most fucking pathetic excuse for a religion

Published June 12th, 2010 by Bobby Henderson

The Flying Spaghetti Monster is the most fucking pathetic excuse for a religion. Bullshit, a bowl of fucking food created you? It doesn’t even have a fucking brain! Ha ha. I can’t believe how much you are offending me, and many others. Especially your FSM "Bible". Why did you have to make fun of my religion, and others? You called the Christian bible The New Testicle. Seriously, stop making fun of other religions. Also, you called the Hindu’s book, "Ten Little Indians". Okay, you are the most twisted, racist fucking bastard on the planet. I can’t believe you are a racist bastard. Why, do you have to make fun of other religions? Probably because you want to just kick back and laugh at other people, and bash them. That’s why. Also, in your queer FSM "Bible", you obiously had to make fun of the Jews. I’m very offended, because the Jews had probably had the roughest life, and you go ahead and make fun of the REAL Bible, not your bullshit bible!!! Your version of heaven sucks huge fucking dicks. I don’t want strippers, and beer is nasty as fuck. You aren’t even trying, and your version of Hell is the most retarded thing I’ve ever heard of. When you’re already DEAD it doesn’t FUCKING MATTER  IF YOU GET AN STD OR NOT!!!!! Fuck you sir, don’t be suprised when you die if you burn in Hell, because I am a solid Christian and I am praying for you, and I really hate that you have to MOCK other religions. You are very racist, and I hope that you burn in Hell and realize your FSM is just your imagination, and you’re full of bullshit. Also, I feel like sueing the publishers of your FSM Bible, since you have gone that far and turned racist.

Don’t be suprised if you get sued for being a RACIST FUCKING DOUCHEBAG! AND YOU CALL YOUR RELIGION "PEACEFUL"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck you,
Mike



1,174 Responses to “most fucking pathetic excuse for a religion”

1 4 5 6 7 8 72
  1. bruceo says:

    Dear Mike,
    The only thing I agree with in your letter is at the very end when you say, “Fuck you, Mike”.

  2. Ham Nox says:

    I swear, this person wasn’t even trying. It has to be fake!!!

  3. Susanne says:

    Not very “Christian” of you. Your God would not appreciate your judgment of others and wishing hell upon them.

  4. Matticus says:

    Wow. I’m going to have to wash my eyes out with soap for an hour to clean off all the filth flung by our new friend Mike here. There’s so much here, I’ll just pick one line and work with that.

    “When you’re already DEAD it doesn’t FUCKING MATTER IF YOU GET AN STD OR NOT!!!!! Fuck you sir, don’t be suprised when you die if you burn in Hell…”

    So the idea of getting an STD when you’re already dead is ridiculous, because you’re already dead. But the idea of burning in hell after you’re already dead is perfectly acceptable. Huh? I know your type love logic fallacies and contradictions, but at least try to put a buffer sentence in between so it’s not so blatantly obvious.

    Oh, and one more thing. You need an actual reason to sue somebody. I don’t think suing someone simply for being a “racist fucking douchebag” is permissible in court. Then again, in America the xtians are rewriting education and law, so who knows? Maybe he’ll be sentenced to be stoned to death.

    RAmen.

    -Matticus

    • Jolly Roger says:

      A lot of my fellow Pastafarians have taken Mike to task over his fine statement about STDs and whether you can suffer from one when dead. I have given this a lot of thought and I suppose there is always necrophilia. It may therefore be possible for your corpse to obtain something like a Candida infection, but I suggest that counts only as a culture that is growing on a food source, unable to consciously recognise “suffering”.

      Jolly Roger

  5. ChandrashekarVishnapurtiRamahadron says:

    Mike, that was a pleasant post. Exhibits the finest characteristics of people of your religious ilk (religious illness, actually).

    You are so very typical of Christians, and so typically ignorant. Your religion, Christianity, is vastly more racist than the FSM, and the bible has story after story about how your evil god purportedly destroyed whole races, or commanded its servants to do likewise. For comparison, in our religion, everyone of every race is welcome to participate and taste the FSM’s noodly goodness, and to actually get a full meal. In comparison, your awful, sadistic religion doesn’t get you anything more than a thin cracker once a week, and barely a taste of wine. And that’s only after you grovel on your knees to your pathological killer and torturer god. We get comfy tables to sit around with friends to partake of our god and share good times and beer, but you just get are sore knees and discomfort.

    So, you lose.

    And you don’t have the right to not be offended.

  6. Superking says:

    Can I get a ‘this guy is dumbtarded’ from any random poster?

  7. Hieronymus Fortesque Lickspittle says:

    That’s a keeper!

  8. juz4kix says:

    Wow! He sounds a little angry.

1 4 5 6 7 8 72

Leave a Reply