This site is frustrating

Published April 29th, 2010 by Bobby Henderson

This site is frustrating because these “pastafarians” just use this mock religion to bash on everyone else’s beliefs. there are pieces in the Bible that seem absurd… talking animals, reanimated corpses, the ground opening up and swallowing people, etc. but nothing that takes THIS great a leap in logic. God isn’t a “bearded man on a cloud” He’s the creative force in this universe. hell isn’t a place where you can “chill with friends, but boy is it hot in here”… hell is a place reserved for Satan, and the people who he deceives into following him there. don’t take all this as “shoving my religion down your throat” take it as a clarification of some misunderstandings some pastafarians seem to have about Christianity. the obvious point behind this website is to say “hey you believe in God without proof, well we believe in noodles, and since they already exist, that counts as proof”… well basically, it’s not proof people should look for in spirituality… it’s doctrine. pastafarian doctrine is an obvious farce. the Bible has integrity. where all these other “religious books” fall short, the Bible stands firm. you guys couldn’t even come up with an original name… it had to be ripped off from the Rastafarians… give the Bible a try, an honest try.

Peace and Love for my fellow humans,
Joe



222 Responses to “This site is frustrating”

  1. tekhedd says:

    “the Bible has integrity”

    Some might take issue with this statement, but I find that mine has done a great job of holding all of its pages together for the last thirty or so years. Or is that not exactly how you meant it?

    Let’s go to the ultimate resource for all web research: wikipedia.

    ‘In an absolute context, the word “integrity” conveys no meaning between people with differing definitions of absolute morality. It becomes nothing more than a vague assertion of perceived political correctness or popularity, similar to using terms such as “good” or “ethical” in a moralistic context.’ –http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Integrity

    I couldn’t have put it better–meaningless in the context of this letter.

    “give the Bible a try”

    No, I’ll stick to eating pasta. Anyway, that bible was a gift from my parents and it has sentimental value, not to mention its value as a reference!

    Peace!

  2. tekhedd says:

    and another thing… :)

    Like Carly, you get a C+ for this assignment. You’ve done a fair job posing as an unbiased passerby who just wants to help, but you project a hostile attitude which comes across more as hate mail than as a friend trying to help. Also, use capital letters and paragraphs next time.

    Hey, wait… maybe this is just plain hate mail. Never mind.

  3. Sean Boyd says:

    This site is frustrating because these “pastafarians” just use this mock religion to bash on everyone else’s beliefs.
    Typically in response to some concerned citizen telling us we’re going to hell, or we suck, or we should be killed, and so on. We don’t have a “turn the other cheek” doctrine. You’re getting us mixed up with Christianity…and given the superficial similarities, I can understand your mistake.

    there are pieces in the Bible that seem absurd… talking animals, reanimated corpses, the ground opening up and swallowing people, etc. but nothing that takes THIS great a leap in logic.
    And yet, the followers of the Bible believe, to a person, in the phenomenon of reanimated corpses. If reanimation is a ridiculous concept, then so is any religion in which reanimation is central to the religion’s dogma. Christianity is such a religion. Via modus ponens, Christianity is a ridiculous religion.

    God isn’t a “bearded man on a cloud” He’s the creative force in this universe.
    Proof? Or is this just a matter of definitions? If so, so what?

    hell isn’t a place where you can “chill with friends, but boy is it hot in here”…
    Like a great 20th century philosopher wrote, “I’d rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints/Sinners are much more fun.”

    hell is a place reserved for Satan, and the people who he deceives into following him there.
    So, let me get this straight. God is merely the ambiguously defined “creative force” in the universe, but Satan has a literal existence as a demon who tortures the souls of the damned?

    don’t take all this as “shoving my religion down your throat” take it as a clarification of some misunderstandings some pastafarians seem to have about Christianity.
    Name such a misunderstanding, please. I was once a Christian, as were many on this site. I’d surmise few misconceptions exist among us.

    the obvious point behind this website is to say “hey you believe in God without proof, well we believe in noodles, and since they already exist, that counts as proof”…
    Oversimplified to the point of not being true.

    well basically, it’s not proof people should look for in spirituality… it’s doctrine.
    What the fuck does this even mean?

    pastafarian doctrine is an obvious farce.
    Well, you sure caught on fast enough. It was started for precisely that reason, pointing out that, if intelligent design can be taught as science, then so can pretty much anything.

    the Bible has integrity.
    Others have already responded to this. The Bible was put together in a fashion that allowed the nascent Catholic Church to consolidate and extend its power. No other reason.

    where all these other “religious books” fall short, the Bible stands firm.
    Really? How are your slaves doing? The Bible says it’s okay to keep them. Stoned any adulterers lately? The Bible allows this sentence to be carried out. How’s that standey, firmey thing working out for ya?

    you guys couldn’t even come up with an original name… it had to be ripped off from the Rastafarians…
    And I thought that was one of the many selling points of our religion.

    give the Bible a try, an honest try.
    An honest try for a fundamentally dishonest book? No thanks.

    Peace and Love for my fellow humans,
    Joe
    If that is your real name.

  4. I'm Brian and so's my wife. says:

    Sigh.

    Basically Joe, in a nutshell, what you’re saying is that your farcical unprovable beliefs are better than our farcical unprovable beliefs, because….erm….well, because you say so.

    Ok then.

    I have news for you Joe. Our farcical beliefs are better that yours because we don’t actually believe them.

    It’s called satire. Look it up.

  5. StJason says:

    Joe… Joe… Joe… Joe… You started so elegantly. Then the insanity overcame you and the end is a rambling mess. Let’s take it nice and easy from the bottom up:

    “. give the Bible a try, an honest try.”
    Okay, first off, can you really, honestly say, that in a western culture that the majority of us live in (and from your use of English, and how you use it, you as well) that we haven’t been exposed to Christianity? For an ‘oppressed religion’ constantly being waged war against (ha.), Christianity is everywhere. Is there a federal holiday for Passover? How about for Vesak? No? Mawlid al-Nabi, I bet everyone gets Mawlid al-Nabi off as a federal holiday… no? Not even for the birth of the Prophet of the second biggest religion on the planet? How odd. How about a Christian Holiday, then? Can anyone come up with a Christian holiday that shuts down the entire federal government, and therefore almost all of the businesses in the western world…

    “you guys couldn’t even come up with an original name… it had to be ripped off from the Rastafarians…”
    And the ‘Bible’, named after Biblos, a Phoenician city famous for their paper making is completely original… how?

    “the Bible has integrity. where all these other “religious books” fall short, the Bible stands firm”
    This argument is inconsistent with your previous statement:
    “there are pieces in the Bible that seem absurd… talking animals, reanimated corpses, the ground opening up and swallowing people, etc.”
    So decision time, Joe. Is the Bible (in your words) absurd and inconsistent, or does it stand firm?

    “the obvious point behind this website is to say “hey you believe in God without proof, well we believe in noodles, and since they already exist, that counts as proof”… well basically, it’s not proof people should look for in spirituality… it’s doctrine. pastafarian doctrine is an obvious farce.”
    Wow. That’s a leap in logic, there.
    1) The obvious point behind this website is clearly stated in the open letter. There is a HUGE link to it in 30-point font right at the top of the page, with the caption ‘read this first’. You, obviously, did not do so, so I will have to tell you. The obvious point behind this website is to say “If you are going to do something so completely moronic as to disguise a thinly-veiled religion class as science, yet try and get away with it by not saying which religion, then we volunteer for that job.”
    2) People shouldn’t look for proof in spirituality? I’ll alert the pope. Thousands of years of religious and philosophical debate have to stop now, as Joe says so.
    3) People shouldn’t look for proof, but doctrine instead? In other words, if you are being stabbed with a knife, it wouldn’t really happen if your holy book said that the pure are immune to knives? Tried walking on water lately, Joe? Or are you saying you are less then pure, in which case, aren’t you going against Jesus’ teaching “Let he who is without sin throw the first stone”? Either way, you stink of hypocrite, Joe.

    “don’t take all this as “shoving my religion down your throat” take it as a clarification of some misunderstandings some pastafarians seem to have about Christianity”
    Okay. I won’t. Likewise, don’t take my pedantic, demeaning, utter shredding of your arguments as shoving your face in it, instead take it as clarification of some of the misconceptions that some Christians named Joe have about Pastafarianism.

    “God isn’t a “bearded man on a cloud” He’s the creative force in this universe. hell isn’t a place where you can “chill with friends, but boy is it hot in here”… hell is a place reserved for Satan, and the people who he deceives into following him there.”
    Wait… GOD doesn’t choose who goes into Country Club Heaven, and who gets kicked into Burning Nasty Stinky Hell? Shouldn’t you let the other Christians who threaten me with eternal damnation this?

    “This site is frustrating because these “pastafarians” just use this mock religion to bash on everyone else’s beliefs.”
    I see. I personally, on behalf of all Pastafarians everywhere, apologize to all the Buddhists whom we have bashed. Likewise all the Muslims, Wiccans, Animists, Taoists, the dozens of non-dietic philosophies, and anyone that I have forgotten.
    Now, how about you doing the same for those of us who follow a logical progression of analytic thought of a knowable universe? Every time your group tries to put God in schools, especially in a science class, you bash my belief.

  6. Janus says:

    I will let you know that many here actually have tried the bible before, as well as other religious texts. What you see as delusion and mockery is the same sort of behavior many of us see by organized religions towards either those of us who have not chosen a single faith or those of us who see the world outside of a pre-made framework that many major religions demand be used.

    Extremists murder people for speaking “blasphemes”, sponsor hate campaigns against “the non-believers”, demand ignorance of anything outside of their world view, and act to take away rights from fellow humans that don’t love in the same way they do. Pastafarians have the occasional flame war and make jokes because we have no desire in our hearts to do any more bodily harm to anyone just because they don’t think like us.

    In the meantime I will think of Mohammad and Jesus sitting at the Buddha Bistro enjoying a communal bowl of Macaroni, as brought to them my their Flying Spaghetti Monster host. I hope some of the more budding artists in our church like this idea and think to bring it to life for our growing gallery of artistic works.

  7. Scott says:

    To those like Joe,

    You’re in the most primitive state of existence. You are afraid of life and afraid of reality. Here’s a tip: all the praying gets you no closer to the solutions you seek. Stop praying. Get off your knees. Stand up. Start doing something to change your circumstances. Better yet, start doing something about the community around you and the place you live. The greatest irony is that the god of your reckoning would have a lot more time for people out there getting their shirt-sleeves up than those hunched over in a church dutifully every Sunday. Check out the term agency (or “human agency”). Oh and by the way I know your religion has so much credibility and “integrity”, so you should have no problem getting a laugh out of this innocent cartoon: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB3g6mXLEKk.

    Scott

  8. Insightful Ape says:

    Hey Chris #16,
    whether you like it or not, I will keep calling a holier than thou troll a jackass.
    And “condescension” is insulting by its nature, you seem to have missed that.

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