This is Bullshit

Published October 16th, 2009 by Bobby Henderson

THIS IS BULLSHIT THIS PUT ME OFF BUT FOR FUCKS SAKE PEOPLE DO NOT FUCKING WORSHIP SOME FUCKING SPAGGETTI WITH 2 FUCKING MEATBALLS WITH SOME FUCKING SAUCE AND A GAY MAN ON A FUCKING ROCK GOING TO EAT IT. WHO PUT THIS SHIT IN YOUR HEADS. SERIOUSLY SORT YOURSELFS OUT. WORSHIPPING PINK UNICORNS, SATAN AND NOW LUNCH. I ALSO THOUGHT THIS WEBSITE WAS A JOKE AND DW I FEEL FOR YOU AND I MAY BE A JEW BUT I KNOW NOT ALL MUSLIMS ARE BAD AND U MAKE A POINT

-A



222 Responses to “This is Bullshit”

  1. PlagueChicken says:

    First off, I want to thank the poster for the most eloquent rebuttal of religion ever made, and I quote”WHO PUT THIS SHIT IN YOUR HEADS. SERIOUSLY SORT YOURSELFS OUT”.

    Now I understand that spelling and the like must sometimes take a back seat to the message, and clearly the all-caps aspect helps drown out the whimpers of language teachers everywhere, so bravo!

    What is less clear is who the mysterious DW might be. “DW I feel for you” Perhaps DW Griffin? What mysterious link exists between these two people? I am intrigued.

  2. Perfi says:

    Bullshit?
    THIS IS PASTA!

  3. Lioss says:

    Oh great,we had exemples of love tolerance by christians,now by jews…
    Can you just practice your religion and let us?
    And what about if pastafarians went to others religious websites to injury the believers?

  4. plumberbob says:

    @ A,

    You’ve come to our website, and you’ve obviously ignored the directive to read the Open Letter and the “About” tab material. You could have learned that our purpose is the exclusion of religious mythology from the science curricula of the public schools.

    Your rage demonstrates clearly that you are out of rational debating strategies. Why don’t you stay in school and learn science, math, and philosophy? It will make the world seem a much safer place than what you’ve heard from the pulpit. Start by studying this observation by astronomer Carl Sagan:

    “How is it that hardly any major religion has looked at science and concluded, ‘This is better than we thought! The Universe is much bigger than our prophets said, grander, more subtle, more elegant. God must be even greater than we dreamed’? Instead they say, ‘No, no, no! My god is a little god, and I want him to stay that way.’” – Carl Sagan

    RAmen

  5. ray says:

    I dunno, y’all. I think this fellow has a point. A course, Im not zackly sure sure what it is, but he says “FOR FUCKS SAKE” and I like people who use that term conversationally. So, I’m converting to Judeaism so I can say “FOR FUCKS SAKE” knowing that my new God will be OK with it. What’s more, he only made one spelling mistake.
    C’mon, let’s all be Jewish, for fucks sake, whaddaya say? We can work on our syntax and punctuation skills later.

  6. StJason says:

    Dear Mr. A,

    We know that the hopeless life of a shut in, home-schooled, teenager is hard. And that the only social contact you get (aside from church) is the two hours ‘research’ time you get on the computer every week. And how you had to beg for that! Hours and hours spent explaining website filters and popup blockers to ‘protect your home’ from the ‘smut and filth’ of the internets. Of course, it’s all gotten worse now that Obama is in the White House, or so they say, but we were talking about you.

    So you spent fifteen minutes whining on your friends MySpace page. Then one of them gave you the link to this place. “l0k! I gO +r0ll!” you typed eagerly back, hoping to curry some favor from the cool kids. So you threw gay in there (always good for a giggle from the guys), and then to throw suspicion you mentioned you were a Jew (again, maybe good for a chuckle from the guys). Then you cut & pasted to your page. Ha-ha. A marvel of intellect and wit.

    But, it didn’t work, did it. They didn’t welcome you in and make you feel like a real part of the group, did they? And then your two hours were up, and your Puritanical mother came in and you had to shut it down. Now, back to your normal life. Nobody to see but your parents. No friends (as your parents don’t want you influenced to violence or drugs like the rest of this cesspool of a world) You are seventeen and you haven’t even touched a girl, much less gotten laid. Your online profile is full of Coldplay and Lil’ Wayne banners yet you haven’t actually heard them (aside from the brief snippits you’ve managed when your parents aren’t watching). Your profile brags about the chronic and forties you do every night, but you aren’t sure what a fourty is even. Beer, perhaps?

    In short, little man. You are nothing. You will grow up nothing, ‘rebel’ against your folks and end up a dropout loser working in a light assembly factory and wondering what ever happened to your life. Don’t feel bad, your parents have gone a long way to hampering you, moreso then most. But ultimately, it is you that is the anchor around your ankle.

    So, thank you for giving us a wonderful… thing…. to make fun of. This is the high point of your life. Enjoy. Move on to obscurity.

  7. Sean Boyd says:

    This one actually hurt to read. I didn’t know reading could cause physical pain, but it can.

    Perhaps he’s unhappy because he thinks our Noodly Master’s meatballs are sausage-based. That would be a turn-off for Muslims as well, and he is right to question the validity of our belief from that seemingly exclusionary notion. But, because the FSM can make things appear the way they he wants them to, for our Jewish and Muslim friends, His meatballs can be beef-based.

  8. Sarah says:

    A,

    I suspect you have low blood sugar and that is why you are in such a rotten mood. Have some pasta, and I bet you’ll feel better :)

    RAmen,
    Sarah

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