This is just……..wow. This is dumber then Budha. You know how hard that is? asshole. While I agree that pirates rule, I also agree FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!. Sorry. Random thought. I have them somtimes. Anyway, this kinda sucks. Like, I know people who worship some pretty fucking stupid things (i.e. Jesus, Allah, Robert De Niro) but this takes the cake, and eats it too. I’m amazed at the stupidity of your mom. She should have pushed herself down the stairs when her and your father procreated. You can’t arrest gravity, right? Do pastafariuns believe in gravity, or is it gravey or somthing like that? anyway, what was I saying? oh yeah, FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!
yours truely, The TOM!
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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Miscellaneous
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
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The only reason (that I can see) this religion uses pirates as a basis is because it’s useful in quoting the absolutely ridiculous statistic that a decline in pirates results in the polar ice-caps melting. It’s useful because it’s absolute bollocks, like about 90% of christian arguments.
“I also agree FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!. Sorry. Random thought. I have them somtimes. ” there’s no point writing something and then apologizing as if it was a mistake; the magic of computers is that you can go back and delete your mistake.
I’m not a believer of pastafarianism. I’m an absolute believer in theory, if an argument with a christian requires me to be a believer and make an equally ridiculous comeback. What people like you have failed to grasp is that this religion is an elaborate joke created for the purpose of disproving other religions.
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What’s so dumb about Buddha? ;(
(btw its spelled Buddha).
(second btw, at least this isn’t dumber than you).
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In time Tom will be touched by His Noodly Appendage, and see the Truth (or an Andy Griffith re-run, whichever comes first). When Tom can feel the love of the FSM, he can buy us all a beer and drown his transgressions. Until then, I hope he comes here often and provides followers of the FsM with such great entertainment.
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This hatemail is so saddening that I pray to the FSM that it is an ill concieved joke.
If not, may the FSM bring love to your heart and replace the hate the currently saturates it.
In Love and Pasta,
Pastafarian Taco
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Oh this person really needs to learn to spell – Actually I found the guy so boring I really can not be bothered with a witty retort, so I am all for hitting him with a big stick with some barbed wire, bits of broken glass and possibly so boric acid on this guy as he really needs to be beaten to an unindentifyable mess exactly like what should of happened to Jar Jar Binks. By the way if you want Attack of the Clones and every time Anakin says “I was thinking of Padame” just shout “naked on top of me” it does improve the story vastly.
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Why wouldn’t it be a religion? It has a deity, a creation myth, a scripture, an eschatology, a mission, an afterlife; it’s just like every other faith.
As Pastafarians, we’re all here on this site to have fun and support each other. We do, however, need to keep our mission and our theology separate. Our mission is to prevent the introduction of any theology into the public school science curricula. Our theology is available as a back-up argument; when the Creationists try to stick their mythology into science classes, they must have ours in there too.
RAmen
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Thank you for your support of the Pastafarians. But, I’d just like to inform you that we are NOT a joke. Everything about our religion is 100% true.
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We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
-Siddartha Guatama (Buddha)-
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Well my little factoring yoctogram, you’ve got a few equations to master!
God=Allah=Dieu=Bůh=Gott etc,.
All the same, you silly radian, just a different language.
Ha~
On to the rest of the letter!
Hm… I don’t really feel like fucking anything today… So that crosses that off.
There’s a church for Robert De Niro?! No wai!!!1!one! :U You have bestowed upon me a priceless piece of information. May His Noodly Appendage touch you for your generous gift!
WE GET CAKE?! AMAZING! Praise be the FSM for such luck!
So…. What if my parents never lived in a multi-story house? They don’t strike me as the type to get it on in public, ya know?
GRAVY ≤ GRAVITY? Again! Praise to the FSM for sending a genius to our homely website and sharing his genius-y ways with us stupid people!
Thank you so much The TOM for sending in this hate mail ’cause it surely was a great laugh. Not only do you win a free internet but you are no longer a yoctogram, you’ve been promoted to a tasteless tetrahedron.
RAmen,
Silence
Pi. Squared.
You spelled Buddha wrong, 000.
And whoever gets the math puns + reference, you win hardcore.
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sure he’s a little wide, but I’m sure you can relate Tom.
“some pretty fucking stupid things (i.e. Jesus, Allah, Robert De Niro) but this takes the cake, and eats it too.”
you sure like insulting others don’t you? here – http://www.angermanagementonline.com/
hope the website helps :)
oh and we can’t take the cake since you ate it. :(
P.S. I like your spelling, they make my 2 year old baby sister seem like a genius.
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Anticipating my future partaking of the blessed Pastafarian sacrament…
RAmen!
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Well actually I do not believe in this so-called gravity theory, but in intelligent falling. Which is the scientific notion that it is to much coincidence that everything always falls downwards. An intelligent agent must be causing this. Although we will not admit to it in public, we all know in our hart that this agent is the FSM!
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Damn it, you didn’t really have to drag a George Carlin joke into this, did you, The TOM?
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Buddha is not stupid, prick.
p.s. your spelling is wonderful, you must have a first grade education!
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English, motherfucker! Do you speak it?
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“The Tom’s” problem is that he is unable to recognize a joke. Especially if it satirizes the stupidity of something else. If this site had even a small amount of logical or even substantive content someone would be doing a satire on it. As it is, no one cares, no one is bookmarking it, and no one will find anything here worth satirizing.
Free spell checkers are pretty common, but if you’re too lazy/ignorant to use them, it doesn’t help, does it?
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In fact, could “The TOM” actually be the almighty FSM himself taking time from his busy schedule to visit and play with us?!?!?!?!?!!
Consider this comment:
“I know people who worship some pretty fucking stupid things (i.e. Jesus, Allah, Robert De Niro)…..”
Then consider that:
- One of Robert de Niro’s greatest roles was as the character of NOODLES in Sergio Leone’s cinematic masterpiece “Once Upon A Time In America”.
- Sergio Leone is most well known for his SPAGHETTI westerns such as Fistfull of Dollars, For a Few Dollars More, The Good The Bad and The Ugly, and Once Upon A Time In The West.
Need I say more?
The FSM works in mysterious ways, and no mere human meatball can claim to understand his noodly ways, but methinks we are witnessing some sort of cheesy miracle here.
If only we could get the people that wrote the bible to interpret this for us.
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First of all, Luigi just blew my God damn mind.
Second of all, dumber than Buddha? Thanks asshole. First time a troll really got to me.
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i just lost some intelligence reading that thanks asshole
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As much as I hate to come out of my role, I will for 105 Kellan Fisher’s comment. If you ever READ this site you would know it is NOT about disproving religions. I am pretty sure if it were half of us lighthearted people that occasionally lurk on this site would not come here. The Original Letter (sacred texts that shall go down in pastafarianism history D:) were created to draw similarities between christianity and pastafarianism. To show people that their arguments can easily be used for many other religions. Unlike OTHER letters from other religious people, the shock affects of people demanding a diety made of meat sauce and eggs would be enough to draw attention.
So stop f-ing putting words in my mouth people. I do not frequent this site with the intention of making fun of relgions. I’m pretty sure i’m not a minority either.
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ugh my grammar. stfu, it’s break. i’ll go back to being an english major later.
*religion
*affects
;-; a mistake in every sentence.
….
ima go back to bed now o 3o
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I would like to say that Christianity is not dumb…
If you pick out the bad bits that contradict the ideas of “Love thy neighbor” and the idea that we should love everyone.
And Jesus, or the idea of Jesus, did actually awaken people who were caught in certain Old Testament beliefs that killing entire families was wrong as previously mentioned that people should love everyone and many other things. True, he is the one who brought in the idea of an awful and painful afterlife, but look at the atrocities he was trying to stop and think that he was facing people who had committed such atrocities. He needed SOME ammunition, right?
But yeah… all religions are pretty beautiful stories if you pick out all of the lack of science and logic in some things.
In everything we shouldn’t be fixated in one system of belief but analyze ourselves and see if what we are doing is right for the human race. Come on, you know you want to. You know evolution wants you to. XP
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Wow. These people get to vote.
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Christians run around talking in a language they’ve never heard of, let alone heard.
. . . And WERE crazy?
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Bad as buddha? fucking asshole
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His inability to fathom the fact that this is clearly just a joke, and everyone on the site is actually a member of another religion, “atheist”, or a christian with a good sense of humor is just further evidence of his…let’s call it an “intellectuality disadvantage”.
Furthermore, if you think back to when you were his age, you will recollect the way you always used to think that the word “random” was hilarious.
My closing statement is that this 14 year old retard-baby is clearly that, as he apologized moments after saying “FUCK YOU”, because he’s afraid that someone is going to get him in trouble somehow over the internet (I don’t know, tell his mommy or something?).
In conclusion, I hope I have swayed your opinion of the intellectual capability of said poster, and if you already came to the same conclusions as I have, let us laugh silently in our heads in unison.
P.S. This kid has Down Syndrome.
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Please do not refer to him as a 14 year old, we’re not that bad…
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Hey check it out it’s #2’s younger brother The Tommy all grown up. And just as useless in real life as he was in KND!
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I think we need to save him. A young person just can’t go around thinking it’s not okay to worship De Niro. True, he’s made some dodgy movies of late but…
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Your message offends my (probably buddhist) beliefs. I hope you get fucked like you intend Bobby to get fucked.
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give me this guys email. I have some things to get off my chest, even if he won’t listen…
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what did Buddha ever do to this kid?
PS, Buddhism technically isn’t a religion. It’s a spiritual belief that does not believe for or against the existence of God (s), but encourages followers to make changes to their own beliefs based on their own experiences rather than follow any dogma blindly, including nihilistic extremes of some atheists.
and why are the people that are the most angered to the point of sending in hate male always so unintelligent and lacking in vocabulary? they don’t make a good case for their creator. ha!
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Your parents should have gotten that abortion. I believe I am a perfect thing to worship. That hurt my feelings :,( The Flying Spaghetti Monster will seek revenge; I am a faithful believer.
ps
I still love you :D
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trolls and caps lock
yay
because there is no best argument that FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU!!!!
and yelling, dont forget that, like if someone is making you competence on the retarded award of the year
and i dont even understand why he does this, is like he is offended because there is some religion that is a bit weird and that is unacceptable or something, so, instead of saying why this is stupid he says some mother insult, that are pretty stupid and old, and like a bitch yelling
sir, is my idea, or are you this man? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVsv5wQqcj4&feature=related
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It’s so amusing to read how some people really don’t get what this site is all about.
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Before today, I would never have believed that Tourette’s manifested itself in the written word, especially when coupled with ADD (what were you saying? Oh yeah…). Learn something new every day. Thanks Tom. Or rather The TOM.
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