We’re working hard at spreading the message of the Holy Flying Spaghetti Monster throughout Mexico and Latin America. You might know that the Virgin of Guadalupe is the holiest figure of the Mexican catholic religion – but things have changed. Now we know that the FSM is also present in one more of the many far away lands. Attached is an image of our findings. We hope you enjoy it!
Bendito sea el Monstruo de Spaghetti Volador! (blessed be the FSM).
Sincerely,
Ana Pimentel, Diego Ramirez and Alfonso Ballesteros
Followers of the FSM in Mexico
Arriba, Monstruo de Spaghetti Volador!
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Oh holy shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!! Bendito sea el FSM!!!!
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Some people believe that I drew this Holy image. I just can say that they’re trying to hide the Holy truth…
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Benditos sean, oh Ana Pimentel, Diego Ramirez y Alfonso Ballesteros, por encontrar el camino hacia la luz eterna del Monstruo de Spaghetti Volador!
(Blessed be, oh Ana Pimentel, Diego Ramirez and Alfonso Ballesteros, for finding the way to the FSM’s eternal light)
Bean.
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Bendito sea por los siglos de los siglos.
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jajaja. religion? dont kidding. fetichistas esquizofrenicos jajaja. en fin. humilde opinion
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This is possibly the best FSM image I’ve ever seen :)
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
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Is it truly desecration when you use photoshop as opposed to spray painting the original image? I don’t think so. The Mexicans and Catholics can still go out and see the original untarnished image if they wish…but why would they, with this kind of improved version on line?
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His Noodliness is not a desecration! How dare you supposed prophet who cannot be proven to exist!
Oh, and there is no god to bless me, so that was a waste of typing.
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have you been touched by the noodle?
Some ask Me how I know the FSM exists and I counter by saying that while the latter is invisible to some it can be sensed much like a fart.
The gas permeates its signature scent in the immediate atmosphere and those who happen to be in the vicinity are a witness.
“we sense it!” they may yelp repeatedly in ecstatic fervor…while mumbling incoherently in an obscure tongue that only they are privy to.
While most deities are invisible and cannot be gleamed with but 5 senses, the latter can be observed with a doze of faith and a developed sense of smell.
Have You been touched by the appendage ala macaroni?
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
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You came across the wrong site. None of us here are confused. We are perfectly well aware of ourselves. The agnostics here don’t think that the thing that the religions you spoke of believe is god, others are of some religion who believe in the separation of church and state, and the rest of us don’t think that there is a god (like me). In your religion, there is no logic. There is no reasoning. There is only mumbo-jumbo you are trying to pass off as fact. And how dare you be so conceited to think that your world view is the supreme and correct one. Get your head out of your ass.
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@Jesso
Of there’s enough proof, you just haven’t take time to look at it.
“Oh, and there is no god to bless me, so that was a waste of typing.”
Because of that assertion it was not a waste to type it, the good thing is that it’s not a requirement for you to believe to be blessed, be sure you are being watch over.
@Lippy Girl
Yes, as much as when someone photoshops one of your pictures, putting your face over an animal, criminal or do whatever that will embarrass you, how would that feel? Would you be mad? Looking for who did it and how to get even, right?
As for Michelangelo’s piece, it’s a piece of art and whatever, personally I think it’s funny and… a very well done
PS
BWT I’m not picking the nick out of a religious context it’s actually my name and as Scott Adams wrote: “Pronounced Hay-soos”
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Ah Jesus…you’re kidding right? If my face were put over an animal using photoshop I really wouldn’t care. I certainly wouldn’t be embarrassed. I definitely wouldn’t try to get even. You must be thinking of the biblical phrase “eye for an eye” which is just not appropriate for the real world. Or are you endorsing the Muslim’s lack of cartoon humour? As an atheist I don’t subscribe to your religious revenge philisophies.
Also, a question for you…you think it’s funny to modify Michelangelo’s work but feel the above art modification is desecration. Both pieces of art were used for religious purposes and have been modified using photoshop to suit more modern purposes. I don’t get it what the difference is between the two situations.
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@Jesso
“There is no reasoning. ”
Oh, there’s plenty, either you haven’t read the right source, or you have got into arguments with the wrong crowd
“There is only mumbo-jumbo you are trying to pass off as fact.”
Oh, you mean dogmas!, maybe if someone takes some time and explains you what faith is you might get it, not to change your mind of course, just for you to have a little more consideration with us, the nutjobs
“And how dare you be so conceited to think that your world view is the supreme and correct one. Get your head out of your ass.”
And your is? if so, idem
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Where is this proof? You keep speaking of proof yet offer none. I have done my research. I have actually read the bible. Not only was it written a good 2 centuries AFTER Jesus supposedly lived (and the gospels can’t even agree on WHERE Jesus was born), it has been modified beyond recognition to suite man’s need for power and control. Not to mention the incredible mistranslations of the bible. Therefore, it cannot count as proof. There is no record of this Jesus ever even existing in Roman records (who kept great ones), nor for the slaughter of the innocents. Herod’s death and Jesus’s supposed birth don’t even line up. So, if the base premise of what you believe in is that Jesus is the son of god, then you are in big trouble because all of your “proof” is discredited.
I don’t need a god to bless me. I earn my own blessings through education, hard work, and being a good person. I don’t need a god to tell me how to be a good person and threaten me with death if I don’t. I don’t need a god or a book to tell me how to be good, and I don’t need a bearded zombie sky daddy to make good things happen to me. I make things happen (and some karma). My family, friends, and I are the only people I need to look out for me. We are doing just fine, thanks.
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@Lippy Girl
The Eye for Eye is old testament, some people still think that applies, I don’t someone once said if you’re transgressed so must endure it 70×7 time, I for one, can’t; I’m not perfect and I would definitely try to find out who did it and get the joke back, as a sport out of fun rather that for vengeance if things escalate out of a mere joke it would be my limit I seek no harm.
I’m called to provide forgiveness to those that harm me, it’s hard but it can be done, I can’t be in communion with God if my heart is full of hatred.
“…Both pieces of art were used for religious purposes and have been modified using photoshop to suit more modern purposes. I don’t get it what the difference is between the two situations…”
Ah!, one is a piece of art, the other one it’s not; there is no scientific evidence that the Tilma of Guadalupe is man-made, many have tried and have failed, and some others that have studied it up close have converted; besides Michelangelo’s paintings are not worshipped there lies the difference, the Tilma is at the center of Catholic devotion here in Mexico.
@Jesso
The must common mistake is to take the Bible literally, I’ve read a lot of books around basketball and I watch a lot of games and I still suck! you need practice, training you need to live it with faith it’s the same
If you want to scientifically fact check everything that happened 2K years ago you need much more that google and a couple of mind-liked buddies and reference writers.
“…and some karma…”
So, if I get this straight, you said that you don’t believe in a deity, but you assert that there is a imaginary force that would build around you, if you do good deeds, well behave and are nice to others? and that this very same force would make good things happen to you?
Seems like you do believe in a god my friend.
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Hey, Hay-soos, the Tilma of Guadalupe is not man-made? Well then, even though there is no religious context, neither is the Statue of Liberty or Mount Rushmore.
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See, there you go again making assumptions. I was a Christian for 24 years. I prayed, I spoke in tongues, and I attended church twice a week. So, I did “practice”, as you say, pretty vigorously, and I’m still an atheist now. However, that really has nothing to do with anything.
You say it is a common mistake to take the book literally? Well, which sections do you take literally and which do you not? Who is actually supposed to interpret which sections? The Catholic Church perhaps? I mean, they have already edited the bible beyond recognition anyway. And the pope is infallible… People can’t check everything that happened 2,000 years ago, but it would be nice if the main cornerstones of Christianity had some basis in fact. In addition to all the historical errors (which in themselves are pretty big), another example of bible error, “almah”, the word used in the original Hebrew bible translates to young woman, not virgin. There is a more specific word for virgin in the Hebrew language “betulah”, so why wasn’t that word used? Probably because Mary wasn’t a virgin. The virgin birth is taken totally literally. Every Christian church in the world believes it, but turns out it was just a mistranslation. Puts a little crimp in the “son of god” thing.
And no, people say that god is an actual being that controls everything in the universe. Karma is more of – if I do good, I get some good back (I’m not talking the Buddhist idea). Just good comes to those who do good, and bad comes to those that do bad. So, not a god. Nice try though.
Still waiting on this proof that you say is in abundance…
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Hey Jesus? Shut up. -_- seriously, honey, you’re just digging a bigger hole for yourself. You’re very easy to argue against and Lippy Girl and Jesse are a bit too good at pointing that out. So shh. You think you’re right, congratulations, tottle off now.
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@Doctor Kitty Horrible
Hey, there, thanks for the suggestion I think I still hang for a while, somewhere around the up left corner of whatever internet browser you are using there is a button, most likely with a left arrow on it, it’s called “the back button”, feel free to use it to avoid further reading of comments on this thread. Now if you are currently thinking that I shouldn’t be telling what to do, well, ditto
@Jesso
Sorry for the assumptions and sorry to hear that you once were Christian and now you’re not, please don’t assume I’m trying of convince anyone out of your current state of mind in regards to religion, I’m not a bible scholar either so I won’t be able to refute all the argumentations around whether the translations are correct or not, I’ll do my best though.
Let’s take “almah”, it’s not literally virgin but taking the actual historic context, back in the day there was no promiscuity, and Mary was around 14 years old and she wasn’t actually married to Joseph at the time of the annunciation they were sort of speak engaged, in promise, perhaps betulah wasn’t not use because it was used to denote people of older age who never married.
“… actual being that controls everything …”
Controls, it’s a strong word, actually the control is in our hands its free will.
As for proof, I’ve personal accounts of things that have happened to me, videos and links, personally I wouldn’t like to fill the thread with links of that sort, but if you tell me I will, like said I don’t want to turn this into an “evagelization” thread, my only point was not to mock sacred image, I kind of get the point made with the FSM although I think there are less silly ways to make it and I don’t think that desecrating holy images gives any validation to it.
” … Just good comes to those who do good, and bad comes to those that do bad …”
Mmmmh, how does that work, is it just because? it is kind of “use the force Luke”?
@ATSAP REVOL
Actually I almost bought it, however I’m puzzled by this http://www.millionface.com/l/statue-of-liberty-the-making/ and this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Construction_of_Mount_Rushmore it seems like someone actually built them!
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As Jesso pointed out in #20, “And the pope is infallible…” is something else that should not be taken literally. Otherwise, the ones who started crusades, were anti-Semites, rapists, child molesters and murderers were infallible?? To say nothing of the early Christian sport of digging up a predecessor you disliked and putting him on trial. Look it up – hilarious!
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@theFewtheProudtheMarinara
I must admit, there’s a huge history of mistakes within the Church and outside, are there child molesters among clergy? Yes, Are there those who deny the Holocaust? Yes
Has the infallible brought lots of problems in the past? YES! But, you see, everything has to be put in context, as human kind as a whole evolves so has its societal structures and communities among them the Church; and in my opinion it’s a mistake to judge and set up your mind, mainly, based on past actions, if we are to apply the same judgment to everything we should be criticizing every action made by Germany since they were the origin of both WW, yet we aren’t and we shouldn’t (this is a parallel example and I’m not implying nor suggesting anything is just a reference)
In the past we, Aztec civilization that is, just to rip the heart out or PoW and young virgins, so mistakes have been made left and right all over the world, all of us as a civilization, however I must admit that the mistakes made by the Church have a greater impact since from its creation the core values are love and respect for others and not harm should have never, ever come from within the Church.
As for “…digging up a predecessor you disliked and putting him on trial…” well that’s the favorite sport of man kind, Jesus himself, then you have many much more examples of “summary” trials Lincoln, Ghandi, MLK, JFK, etc, etc.
We as a society are all screwed up, not only the Church, and it’s up to us to prevent that from keep happening so far we have suck at it…
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Viva el FSM.
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@Jesus
Thanks for the entertainment. I hope you stick around for a while. Just one question for you right now. In your version of happenings is the story of Adam and Eve literal?
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JESUS (#22)
No, no, no, dear Hay-sus, the links you provided were put on the net by Satan to mislead naive people into believing that the Statue of Liberty and Mount Rushmore are man-made. These two sacred sites have the same origin as the Tilma of Guadalupe and dozens of other Catholic shrines.
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The image of the Almah Mary, through Divine intervention, appears on toasted cheese sandwiches, potato chips, and stains on carpets. This is likewise true for the Holy Flying Spaghetti Monster (see the many photos displayed on this website). These miracles, which are beyond human comprehension, are blessed infallibly by, respectively, The Pope and Bobby Henderson.
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May your faith in miracles continue unabated. (And for a modern miracle, try Evangelist Peter Jackoff’s Miracle Water.)
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rAmen, Hay-sus
St. ATSAP REVOL, The Patron Saint of Honest to Gawd Miracles
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This “free will” that you speak of is a contradiction in itself.
Your god is the greatest thing that you can imagine – the most perfect being
Therefore, god must be omniscient in order to be the greatest you can imagine
Therefore, god must also be infallible (never wrong) in order to be the most perfect being
You say god gives us free will
However, if god is omniscient, then he already knows what I will do before I make that choice
If he is infallible, then what he knows cannot be wrong
Therefore, he knows what I will do before I do it.
I must do what god knows I will do because he is never wrong
Therefore, I do not have a choice in what I do because god always knows what I will choose.
Therefore I do not have free will – my choices are predetermined.
And yes, the force comes from string theory. Everything is made of up of all the same things, these tiny little invisible to us strings that are vibrating. So, a “force” would actually be possible.
Your personal experience doesn’t count as proof either. Your mind plays tricks on you. You do know how notoriously inaccurate eyewitness statements are, right? So, if you are hearing voices or seeing things, then you should probably see a psychiatrist and get on some meds.
And the only reason anything is considered “sacred” is because a human said so, not a god. I’m not really concerned about what men say is sacred. That is just another excuse to start wars. And this Michelangelo painting that you are so worried about? He did a pretty good job of mocking the Catholic church in his time. Some even say he was an atheist… So, I don’t think he would mind.
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You know, I looked at that picture several times before it dawned on me that the FSM need only tilt his head back a few degrees and he’d be able to look right up the Virgin’s dress!!
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Eloquence at its best indeed.
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Hey Jesus, did you know the real Jesus was a velociraptor?
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More proof of the Virgin-FSM relationship
http://www.lecoindelenigme.com/image/Virgen-OVNI.jpg
http://siglo30.com/images/Virgen_y_ovni3.JPG
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@Raptor
Wow! What a coincidence last week I was just telling my wife that the image on the Shroud of Turin looked like a dinosaur!!! Thanks for clarifying that it’s a dromaeosauridae
Do you know where I can find more information about it?
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Opps I missed a bunch of msg.
@EvilAtheist
Nope, not literal, Catholic teachings and the science behind evolution are not against each other
@JESUS
Really, there’re even book about their construction? You mean it’s all fake? All created by evil conspirators bound to control our minds? That want us not to believe in the Holy existence of the great-architect? The monument-maker?
That’s just awful, those bastards!
Carpet stains, chips! Hehehehe! Good one… I’ve never worship a potato chip.
Peter Jackoff’s Miracle Water who is he? The new prophet?
@Jesso
As you said, nice try, nope
You know what a decision tree is?
Well God knows them all, for every single action and unaction he doesn’t decide you do, he only knows the outcome.
“So, I don’t think he would mind.”
Neither do I.
“So, if you are hearing voices or seeing things, then you should probably see a psychiatrist and get on some meds.”
Voices and visions, hehehehe, now you’re the one with assumptions.
And about to consider what’s sacred and what’s not, it’s based in a little overlooked concept called Respect.
@Horace Hogsnort
Oh, silly, he wouldn’t
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Further clarification
“And this Michelangelo painting that you are so worried about?”
I’m not and I said it before I’m ok with it, I do have a problem about using sacred images for mere amusement, there’s no need for that. you might have stop believing in God but that doesn’t justify being disrespectful.
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@JESUS
Oh, I’m sorry for the typographical error. “Evangelist Peter Jackoff” should have been “Evangelist Peter Popoff.” I know the name itself looks like a joke, but unfortunately he’s real. Look him up on the web or go to You Tube.
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Old Pete has made lots of money peddling his “Miracle Spring Water.” It’s a good example of how the gullible masses can be exploited by Miracle Peddlers. Perhaps the Catholic Church’s dispensation of indulgences or praying a soul through purgatory for a fee is similar?
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ATSAP REVOL, Pastafarian Miracle Worker (send your contribution of $27 C/O Bobby Henderson. You will receive a packet of my Miracle Sphagetti, which will cure all ills and make you rich. The first 1,000 contributors also will receive a small jar of my Miracle Marinara Sauce.)
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You know what a decision tree is?
– Yes
Well God knows them all, for every single action and unaction he doesn’t decide you do, he only knows the outcome
– I did not say that god decides for me, and you just proved my point. Since god has always known everything that was going to happen from the beginning of time and into infinity, then he knew my choice before I even had the option to make the decision. If he knows the outcome I don’t REALLY have a choice because I cannot make a decision contrary to what god knows will happen. I must choose that choice because he is never wrong. Therefore, decision is an illusion.
“So, I don’t think he would mind.”
Neither do I.
– Good.
“So, if you are hearing voices or seeing things, then you should probably see a psychiatrist and get on some meds.”
Voices and visions, hehehehe, now you’re the one with assumptions.
– That would be the “IF” part. I qualified it, so there was no assumption. I never said that you were definitely hearing or seeing anything anything.
And about to consider what’s sacred and what’s not, it’s based in a little overlooked concept called Respect.
– You need a comma there. Otherwise you are saying that respect is NOT often overlooked. However I understand what you are saying so here we go:
Sacred: concerned with religion or religious purposes;
consecrated: made or declared or believed to be holy; devoted to a deity or some religious
ceremony or use
hallowed: worthy of religious veneration;
So something being sacred has nothing to do with respect. It has everything to do with religion. Religion is made by man. Which brings me back to my point. What is sacred is determined by man. So, again, I’m not concerned with what man considers sacred.
It isn’t disrespectful. You just find it so, and are offended, because of the god part. You wouldn’t think twice about it if the picture had no religious connotations. We are actually honoring Michelangelo by using his painting to represent our views. As I already said, he often mocked the church and some argue that he was an atheist. If that was the case, he may have even been offended to paint it! He could have just done it for the money! It is really all about the artists opinion anyway, and we have both agreed that he wouldn’t mind, so it is a moot point.
Still waiting on proof…
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Remove the double anything. Apologies to His Noodlyness for my poor editing!
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Ana, Diego y Alfonso: gracias por traer a la luz esta bellísima imagen, está genial.
¿Saben? A veces me he preguntado qué haría el gobierno de nuestras ciudades si de pronto los pastafari nos unimos y queremos hacer una peregrinación como las que hacen los católicos el 12 de diciembre. Dudo mucho que nos dejen bloquear calles para andar bailando por ahí disfrazados como lo hacen ellos.
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Horribly photoshoped.
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jajajajajaja el Sagrado Monesvol está por doquier =D
Our beautiful country would be much better if 90% of the people weren’t insanely fanatized with this image, created by Spaniards to hold down indigenous peoples and mestizos. Greetings from Mexico! And down with catholic mafia! well, also all christian, islamic and jewish mafias… all of them but the Holy FSM =D
Greetings from Mexico!
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As a Catholic I find this image histarical for one reason. If the FSM is suppose to be the Pastifarianism God and he is all good as a mock of the Christian, Jewish, Islam, monotheistic God, why do you have Mary standing on him. In the painting she is not standing on God. In the story of the painting, she appeared standing on the God of the Mexicans, which was the snake, also symbolized meaning of the devil, she was above that God (Satan) and was crushing it. And since she wasn’t the deity, she was bowing her head in respect of the One True God, so the snake god wasn’t as powerful as this woman, who wasn’t even a Godly figure. So in a sense the FSM is the devil and the Christian God is still a top the FSM (Satan). Sometimes a back ground story can help before you prove yourselves wrong, and i know this is a great mockery, but if you’re going to do it at least do some fact checking.
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After reading every comment on this post, i have to say i’ve heard both sides of the arguement my whole life and i’ve come to the conclusion that if there really is a God, and he’s perfect like i think he would have to be then i would have no idea what to think because i’ve never seen perfect and i doubt anyone else has seen perfection. Our minds can’t grasp perfection because we have never experiensed true perfection, only what our minds percieve as perfection. Human logic is flawed, so my logic will be different from that of an Atheist or what have you. And if God is so perfect why didn’t he make us perfect, well i say if I were God, it would be boring for everyone to be just like me. It’s not proof, but what do i care.
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“Our beautiful country would be much better if 90% of the people weren’t insanely fanatized with this image”
Your country was build around Her image, and it’s being smashed to bit because we have stop believing in her and we have forgotten what’s it’s to be Catholic, respect and love for your neighbor, however the culture of “screw you”, “me first”, “me, me, me” has lead us to self destruction.
” … created by Spaniards to hold down indigenous peoples and mestizos …”
Prove it
Too many replies to catch up, way too much work, back when I can.
God Bless you Daniel…
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Nice parody.
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