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My College Dining commons is, at this very moment, preforming debased and blasphemous acts with it’s pasta displays. Attached is my complaint letter. Be warned, their depravity knows no bounds, and what I write of their acts may shake you to your very core, but such perversion must be fought with stalwart hearts wherever it is found. I shall keep you posted on the aftermath if you are so inclined, fellow pastafarian
Noodly Yours,
Walter
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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A shining example to all of us! Fight the power, brother! Rejoice!
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That may be going a little far and be unfair. They probably do the same thing to the cracker display, to show their religious neutrality.
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*Sigh* Fundamentalists and their dogma….
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Silly Walter, it’s not about dressing like pirates, and so long as they are consuming his noodly flesh, it need not be shaped in his noodly form. One step at a time, although it is wonderful you are attempting to spread his noodly goodness. Don’t be too hard on them though, they’re clearly trying if they’re eating the pasta.
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honestly people is it SOOOO much to ask that when you eat pasta you put on a eye patch, i dont really go with the more radical people in our religion that say you must be IN FULL regalia i just want a eye patch, or maybe just a pirate hat, thats all. im being reasonable here
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Arrrr, keep up the fight, matey!
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Dear Walter,
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Good for you! Give that infidel Dining Staff a hard time. How would they like it if you blatantly displayed a statue of Jesus in a flagrant pose?
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If necessary, go to the President of the University and demand that the Food Service Staff dress as pirates on days that Spaghetti is served.
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Make them show profound respect for our Noble Lord, The Flying Spaghetti Monster.
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ATSAP REVOL (*bows toward UMass and flatulates*)
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I, as a fellow umass amherst student, am proud to see my fellow pastafarian/minutemen taking a stand against the blasphemous displays at the DCs, thank you pastafarian walter!
RAmen
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Yes, Pastafarians are being persecuted everywhere. Just look a can of Chef BoyArDee. His noodliness is not being portrayed properly. This needs to stop. I say, let’s start a boycott. ;)
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Walter, you are a true pasta warrior. Keep up the good work, and may His noodlyness be with you always.
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This made my day!
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Mmmmmm,
interestinf theological point. Lets hope it doesn’t lead to a split. I was of the opinion that all sorts of pasta was good, and that decoration in the traditional way should be reserved for holidays (Friday). But we should be forgiving of those who digress a bit.
Good training there though.
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We must learn to be tolerant. Other religions attempt to force their views on society; we must not be seen as such a religion. People must be free to arrange their pasta as they see fit, else no one is free!
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Yes! How dare they show such disrespect. Just because they’re obviously jealous of our religion in which anyone can join… I’m thinking that they should do something as an apology for this. Maybe dedicate the whole restaraunt to the FSM… And make everyone who comes in worship the kind and gentle monster.
I’ve not being worshipping for long myself… But I’m hoping to benifit on the rewards of being Pastafarian such as simply having something invisible to look up to when times aren’t so good.
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Yarrrrgggh! I propose a fatwa to that establishment! A 100 year beer drought plague be upon them all unless they repent.
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ROFLMAO!!! Poor manager when he sees this. Still, kudos to him for having a feedback service around.
Ramen.
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ROTFL!
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
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That’s going a bit too far. It’d be different if they advertised themselves as a Pastafarian establishment, but they don’t. This is the second time this week I’ve felt the need to quote this:
“So remember, Pastafarians are not assholes. We simply deliver His Word and let the people decide.” – Page 93, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Seriously, live and let live. Don’t be an asshole.
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You know, someone had just said “Jesus in a flagrant pose” seriously, I’d pay to see that!
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Even as I can understand the rage of our fellows, I think tolerance is a value. We must understand that not everybody in our societies is Pastafarian. The times of Pastafarianity are gone, and we must focuse our message of Pastafarianism and a humanistic approach to Pastafarianism.
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IRRYD#1!
Let them be. It’s OK pointing out the mistakes made out of ignorance, but you’r taking it a bit too far, mate, as taking the matter to court would go against IRRYD#2 ))
Be nice to others as they eat the same pasta we all do (IRRYD#3)
RAmen
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I am a noobie to FSM, but am really enjoying the discourse. I have been searching for something to fill the void and traditional religions contain too much violence, intolerance and disharmony for me. I find nothing disharmonious about wearing a pirate costume while eating a nice warm bowel of pasta. Thank you for improving my life.
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O crap. We got some fundamentalists pastafarian. I can just see the headlines. Sit in’s at local Olive Gardan. Protest at pasta factories for not correctly processing our lord thy god. Or worse still, picket lines at Arbys for having kosher meals, but nothing for us. Sigh.
Though, I really do look forward to how this turns out.
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Hope you know that it’s pirates’s day today ;)
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Although you are trying to do a great service, use caution. We know as little about what will truly please the FSM as they do; We don’t want to be seen as enforcing a dogmatic religion and forcing it upon others or we will have dropped to the same low level as Christians
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Your’e in college? I would think that you could spell “performing.”
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well wishes upon ye fair walter, for truth and fairness is all that we may seek….
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And gabby, as a rather new follower i would like to extend to you a noodly appendage handshake and say that i understand and respect and also follow for some of the same reasons you are here for
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…”preformed debased and blasphemous acts”…I find it educational – and hilarious – that you successfully spell “blasphemous”, yet the much simpler “performed” eludes you. Consider upping your consumption of protein. Considerably.
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While I applaud your devotion to the FSM, let us not forget the first of the holy I Would Really Rather You Didn’ts: “I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Act Like a Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don’t Believe In Me, That’s Okay. Really, I’m Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn’t About Them So Don’t Change The Subject.”
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It was mentioned in comment #22, but I believe its important enough to repeat. As much I appreciate your zeal brother Walter, I must direct your attention to the good book, the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, I’d Really Rather You Didn’t #1 : # I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Act Like a Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don’t Believe In Me, That’s Okay. Really, I’m Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn’t About Them So Don’t Change The Subject. The FSM is a humble deity and such fundamentalism is unbefitting a Pastafarian.
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@#27: Unfortunate apostrophe placement right there, don’tcha think? Walter: come up and see the travesty they call “pasta” at Worcester!
-Richard
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@ Alex
Yes, we are animals, aren’t we? Nice to know you admit the equivalency of humanity and other animals.
But we don’t believe in Hell, so we won’t burn there. ^.~
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Pasta, spaghetti was invented by the Chinese long before they made up the Jesus story. Alexander The Great brought Pasta to Europe. Italy has nothing to do with Pasta, exept for nailing this Jesus character, probably afraid already of Christianity.
Please do not laugh about Pastafarians as we do not lau=gh about other religions.
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I would like to set up a Dutch Church, connecting with The Pastafarians. Please contact me on
verlichting1@hotmail.com since I am travelling. Thanks, Hans JC van Gerwen
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I applaud your enthusiam and evident passion for the FSM. This religion is one of understanding. No where does it say one must be dressed in Pirate garb to ingest to holiest of holy foods. You don’t even have to eat pasta to praise him. Review your IRRYD’s and maybe graze over the gospel once more. We are better than this. This is the first step towards extremism. RAmen.
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We, the association of pastafarians of Laval University in Quebec City, Canada (Especially the physics department) are with you and follow all that our lord showed us. We are making the best to spread the word around the university and tell the christians organisations that we are the one who are right. And that everyone should be touched by it’s noodly appendage. We are going very soon to be an accredited association in the student association’s associations… anyway. We are making negative publicity in the campus right now ( we remove religious posters all over the university) but I guess that this not very legal. We’ll be making flyers very soon, I hope that we will be able to translate them in french without any copyright stuff.
Keep up the good work
Association of French Canadians Pastafarian Students Of Laval University (Association Québécoise des étudiants Pastafariens de l’Université Laval)
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im new to the church, and i agree completely with what you have said in your letter, thank you, and keep fighting. if anyone wants to speak or enlighten me on how to be a good pastafarian, contact me on rokwilstr@live.co.uk thank you it will be extremely appreciated.
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RAmen Brother!!!
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I live in The Hague, Netherlands and practice Shikan-taza (sitting meditation). When I’m sitting all sorts of questions haunt me. Were Buddha and Bodhidharma pastafarians? Are the FSM and Buddha one? What do pastafarians wear when they’re meditating? Or don’t they need to meditate, because they drink rum? Enlighten me, please.
Lots of tulips from The Hague,
gassho or Ramen?
Kees
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Aww man was this actually posted at the berkshire DC??? I’m so pissed I missed it!! I would have loved to see this since I go there everyday!!! Pastafarians unite!!!!!!
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Oh my pasta! I first thought that looked an awful lot like the ones from UMASS Amherst but didn’t notice the logo at the bottom until now! Props to whatever UMASS student did this! If I didn’t graduate last year I would have tracked you down and made you be my friend! I did not come across many fellow pastafarians (or thinkers) with my time spent at UMass. Thanks for giving our school a good name and may his noodliness bestow his gifts upon you.
Ramen.
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One thing worth mentioning to people who find this letter to be going to strong on the college, mean, et cet… Besides the obvious transgressions against Him, the letter may serve to prevent another issue. When a suit is brought on religious grounds against a private or especially a public entity, it is often intertwined with equal protection issues (relevant to several laws, not necessarily the 14th Amendment). As part of their case, the plaintiff will have to prove they were treated differently because of their class (religion, i.e.). If the defendant can showed this was not the case, many causes of action will fail by that fact alone. The very fact this letter was written gives the college cause to ignore other complaints by more popular religions- i.e. the catholics wanting meat banned at certain times, the jews demanding exclusively kosher dining halls, et cet, a muslim claiming their faith was not being accommodated vis a vis providing a prayer room/requiring women to dress a certain way.
Fact is, the school’s failure to accede to the letter writer’s demands provides some basis for a defense to possible future claims of religious discrimination/intolerance. After all, it would be a sad day indeed when the catholics ban meatballs from the dining halls during lent or the muslims prevent our women from wearing pirate outfits that expose arms.
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