EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU NEEDS TO KEEP YOUR DEROGATORY COMMENTS TO YOURSELVES.
DON’T SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT MY LORD AND SAVIOR. SOME BELIEVE AND SOME DON’T, IT’S A CHOICE. JUST FOR THE RECORD WHAT IS STUPID IS WHEN YOU MAKE DEROGATORY COMMENTS ABOUT SOMEONE THAT HAVE SUFFERED AND DIED FOR YOU. TAKING OUR SINS AND ETC UPON HIMSELF SO THAT WE CAN KNOW OUR HEAVENLY FATHER. YOU ALL SHOULD GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES RIGHT NOW; AND ASK JEHOVAH GOD FOR FORGIVENESS. WHAT IS STUPID THAT WHEN WE ALL GOT SO MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR; AND WE DON’T EVEN REALIZE IT UNTIL IT’S GONE.
DARLA
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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Miscellaneous
Darla…. darling…….. are you Palin’s love child, or something? You seem to be channeling her unique brand of….. (whatever it is). Well, at least you seem to be a Joni Mitchell fan, so you can’t be all bad. So, “may the penne be with you”, “go with fetuccini”…….. etc., etc.
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I was raised Christian, but I’m an agnostic(google it) I’ve never doubted that Jesus lived since he’s mentioned in several holy books, but I highly doubt that he did all those things. He said he could could speak to God, but you can see people talking to God almost everywhere in for example New York, but do they get the status of being Gods tool? Oh, and one other thing, Jews don’t believe in Jesus, does that make them Satan’s spawn? I embraced FSM just today and I feel guuuuuuud!
”And thy shall have pasta to eat, sauce to drink, and balls to nibble”
Peace!
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Darla,
Clearly you have yet to be touched by the noodly appendage of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Some believe and some don’t, it’s a choice. I will pray to his noodliness for your soul, that you may soon drink the sauce of life.
And for the record, what’s stupid is visiting a website full of people who obviously don’t share your beliefs and asking them to convert using poor grammar and the caps lock button. WEAPONS OF MASS STUPIDITY!!!
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“EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU NEEDS TO KEEP YOUR DEROGATORY COMMENTS TO YOURSELVES.”
First she goes on to claim that we make derogatory comments and then pushed her own agenda upon us – like a fork, swirling in the ether of noodles.
I also misread “suffered and died for you” as “souffle’d and dried for you” and I though….MMMmmmm, Yummy!!!
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“DON’T SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT MY LORD AND SAVIOR. SOME BELIEVE AND SOME DON’T, IT’S A CHOICE.”
You know what else is a choice Darla? Reading the comments on this website and responding to them.
I suggest you CHOOSE not to in the future.
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@ 152 – They see me rollin’
Just out of interest, are you agnostic about Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy, or invisible pink unicorns?
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rollin’ (#152) said “I’ve never doubted that Jesus lived since he’s mentioned in several holy books”. Yeah, but the odd thing, rollin’, is how he’s not mentioned in secular writings. You’d figure someone who rose from the dead, brought others back to life and preached to multitudes would have gotten SOME press, wouldn’t you?
Others I seen in several books: Sherlock Holmes, Frodo Baggins, Nancy Drew, Tarzan the Ape Man, James Bond, Harry Potter and Wonder Woman. Which of these is real? (please say Wonder Woman!)
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The hilarity of this comment to me that Christianity teaches peace, understanding and good will toward all people even non-believers, but majority of the hate mail-ers are rude, judgmental and downright vicious. It seems to me they all have a do-as-i-say-not-as-i-do mentality. They want respect and the freedom to believe and worship whatever and whomever they choose but can’t do us the same small decency. Hopefully they will be comforted by his noodly appendage and see the true meaning of life is love, happiness and piracy.
RAmen!
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@158
Ramen to that.
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LOOK! I CAN WRITE IN ALL CAPS, TOO! THAT MAKES ME HIGHLY INTELLIGENT AND MAKES MY PHILOSOPHICAL BELIEFS MORE VALID AND CORRECT THAN ANY OTHERS!!!
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Why did she scream her name as well?
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Ahem…
There are a few points in this letter I’d like to address.
1.” YOU ALL SHOULD GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES RIGHT NOW;”
My, you’re quite a kinky fellow. Well alright,
2.”AND ASK JEHOVAH GOD FOR FORGIVENESS…”
Oh, not what I was hoping for.
Anyway, I did a few years ago. He hasn’t called me back. Not that I’m complaining, but if he spent less time putting random religious idols on cheese sandwiches and more time interfering for the good of man-kind, I’d be tempted to believe in a higher omnipotent being.
3. Quit abusing the semi-colon. What did the semi-colon ever do to you?
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“DON’T SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT MY LORD AND SAVIOR. SOME BELIEVE AND SOME DON’T, IT’S A CHOICE.”
Then why do you even care what others say!! exactly, is our choise not to believe, and in the end, we all will die for heresy and you will go to your pretty heaven, so what do you care if we are gonna burn in the hell for our sins and crap
maybe she is trying to save us, by telling us we are stupid.. no. WE ARE STUPID IN CAPS LOCKS WAY! RAAAWR!!!
158, 160, RAmen to that
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I can understand Darla’s frustration: after all, we’re failing to worship a supreme being that she has read about. I feel the same way whenever I see people perusing those sacred texts called comic books. What irreverence! Those books are full of supreme beings as well!
I often wonder, after I have finished reading, whilst standing in awe, why does no one worship Galactus, Devourer of Worlds? Surely he shall visit the Earth in his wrath and hunger and teach us puny mortals a lesson!
Hmm…maybe we can whip up a huge pot of spaghetti for him? I’m sure he and the FSM would be best buddies, after all.
-Supreme Herald of the Church of Galactus (coming soon to a city near you!)
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I am not being “DEROGATORY” I am simply spreading my beliefs to those who have not heard of them. And where is your proof of this man “who died for our sins” exactly what is the true definition of a sin? Truly nothing is wrong or immoral it just matters about your views of life and the world around you. And why are you making fun of my lord? You are a very hypocritical person; of course that is fine. And why should I pray to your god; I am not trying to be offensive to your god in any way. I am just wondering why should I listen to you? There is no gain I do not know you and do not fear you so I shall ignore you.
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Oh Darla, I am the son of the FSM. You may know me as Jeebus. I just wanted to let you know that the FSM is the all knowing creator, and not this old man who lives in Cloud City like the untruthful, and offensive story book that the christians believe in. You are an intolerant bitch and I will beg of my father to save your soul.
LET THY BE TOUCHED BY HIS NOODLY APPENDAGE!
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Darla,
We are not making fun of your God…just your FUCKED UP perception of God…
and you know, if we are going to hell, then I hope the beer is cold, the sun is shining and the women are willing!
Kind regards,
The minister’s son.
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If it’s a choice to believe in a religion or not why can’t we voice our opinion on the subject? This type of closed minded thinking is why religion has such a bad reputation in the first place.
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Well hey there?
Whats the diffrence between your “god” and the flying spaghetti monster?
You believe in some dumbass who created world in 7days. Then who created god? and what did that take? like 10 minutes, i believe that your god is a pizza that the flying spaghetti monster ordered!
FSM is so much more awesoem than your pizza god, our got 2 balls or 2 eyes depending how you see it.
well, your god was created by my god so i won! one to nothi´n
and dont tell me that your god created itself cuz thats not possible. and if you belive in god and jesus and peoples souls ´n stuff, why dont you believe in trolls that live in the woods eating kids for LUNCH (trolls dont eat kids, they eat spaghetti, everyone knows that!)
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
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EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU NEEDS TO KEEP YOUR DEROGATORY COMMENTS TO YOURSELVES.
DON’T SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT MY GOD. SOME BELIEVE AND SOME DON’T, IT’S A CHOICE. JUST FOR THE RECORD WHAT IS STUPID IS WHEN YOU MAKE DEROGATORY COMMENTS ABOUT THE TRUE GOD. YOU ALL SHOULD GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES RIGHT NOW; AND ASK THE TRUE GOD FOR FORGIVENESS. WHAT IS STUPID THAT WHEN WE ALL GOT SO MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR; AND WE DON’T EVEN REALIZE IT UNTIL IT’S GONE.
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I also love how people complain that FSM has no proof…
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Qazerowl (#173): So you’re saying YOUR god is the TRUE god, and ours is an insult to you. Proof, please. Hey, at least most of us live in a time and place where there IS a choice. It hasn’t always been like this. Be born a Muslim in the Middle East, then say you choose Christianity or *gasp* Judaism, and see what that gets you. Find out how many people died in the Reformation (ie the Catholic/Protestant wars of the Middle Ages), then find out how much “choice” people have had.
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#172 Ohmidamn…:
“a poorly done Photoshop job with a bunch of clouds” ?!?!!!!?
It is NOT Photoshopped!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…and let’s see YOU do a better Photoshopping job, then! Harrumph!!
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To Ohmidamn
I’m not calling you a hypocrite, I’m calling you an idiot.
The point is there is no more proof for your “more realistic religions” then there is for this, if you bothered to read the ‘about page’ before posting your “thoughts typed randomly” you would know that’s the point.
That goes for you as well “TEEHEE” post 170 and “RAHHH” post 169, the three of you just go to show what’s wrong with the world nowadays, quick to have an opinion without any knowledge of the subject.
You three are as thick as the big print version of the Complete Works of Charles Dickens!
G
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Jehovah God? I thought his name was Harold… you know, as in the prayer “Our father who art in Heaven, Harold be thy name…”
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Rahhh, #169 said ” It’s a lump of noodles, with two meatballs and sauce…. How dumb can we get.”
Well that’s not ALL the FSM is. He has EYES, too…and I hear he sometimes wears a hat around Christmastime…with a bell on it. So there.
If having eyes and wearing a jingly hat isn’t enough proof enough, well, then I don’t know what IS.
NOW do you believe?
It’s OK if you feel the need to cry.
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