I was recently ordering new checks (who uses checks anymore?) when I noticed that my bank and most check places only had christian-related or lame spiritually-related checks available for order. This annoyed me and after some contemplation I had a eureka moment, though I’m inclined to think that I was nudged into this by his noodly appendage from above! So I grabbed an image from the most holiest of sites on his noodly web and went to the nearest custom checks facility on the web, i.e. the first one that came up in Google. The result is this marvelous creation which I’ve included for your enjoyment!
-Bradley
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Bradley,
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Your creation of FSM checks is brilliant. You’ll probably raise eyebrows when you present one of these to pay for goods at some local stores.
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Now, let’s get the Treasury Department to omit the tired old “In God We Trust,” and replace it with “Touched By His Noodly Appendage” on our currency and coins.
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Similarly, the pledge of allegiance should be revised to: “…And to the Republic for which it stands, one nation, UNDER THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, with meatballs and parmesan for all.”
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And as for patriotic songs, such as “God Bless America,” substitute FSM where appropriate.
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Brad, your innovative check is the first step in the right direction.
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A Big RAmen for Bradley,
Bishop ATSAP REVOL, The Pontiff’s Pastafarian Prelate
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Super! If I ever used checks, I would copy this idea.
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Nice idea, I don’t use checks but I might get a custom printed pin/credit card featuring his noodlyness
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It looks so good that people might frame it instead of taking it to tha bank.
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Brilliant ! rAmen
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Sweet. I don’t use checks, either, but I’m thinking of the Capital One commercial where you can use your own photo…
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Love it! Just brilliant!
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That is SO awesome.
RAmen
ET
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
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If I ever get a custom debit card (I don’t use checks), I will most definitely copy your idea. BRILLIANT!
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Outstanding!
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Wonderful! Please send me half a dozen of these holy cheques, signed but otherwise blank, to help me with my spiritual meditations.
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You sir, win one internets.
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@wigglyfiggle First let me introduce you to something called spell check, second I didn’t really destroy since it’s just a picture of the actual painting but I bet you can’t even name what the original is, where it is, or who painted it without resorting to Google.
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@wigglyfiggle First let me introduce you to something called spell check, second I didn’t really “destroy” it since it’s just a picture of the actual painting but I bet you can’t even name what the original is, where it is, or who painted it without resorting to Google.
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Dear Wigglyfiggle,
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I will be happy to get a “real” religion if you can identify one. Let’s see, the adjective “real” eliminates Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Shinto, and about 3,000 other mythologies.
Of course you are too “completely STUPID” to know what the words adjective and mythology mean. Hence, the only advice I can give you is: piss off, you “peice” [sic] of shit.
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ATSAP REVOL, Adversary To Stupid-Assed People
(Fortunately, I was in a charitable mood today, or I might have been more candid with you.)
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Yanno, if enough people hit the same custom check site with the same pic request, we might get something going, maybe one of the big companies would do a 4-scene rotation. I rarely use checks, but I’ll definitely use up what I have so I can order those!
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I tried to do something similar with my debit card (after being inspired by what Bradley has done here). I got an e-mail back from compass.
“We regret that we couldn’t accept the image you submitted for your Personalized Check Card as it doesn’t comply with our image guidelines. Please review the guidelines listed below and follow this link to try again.”
I’m trying to figure out which guideline I violated…possibly the nudity one, but I cropped out the unmentionables for that very reason…
Maybe the “Material /content demonstrating the views and/or opinions of political groups, religious groups or anti-social or socially unacceptable groups,” but then I wonder if they’d let someone put a cross on their card.
Maybe I should try with a different image of the FSM, or the Jolly Fish.
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@ 9 – wigglyfiggle – .
You seem to have gotten lost somewhere between the Creationist Museum and The Sistine Chapel in the Vatican where the original of Michelangelo’s Creation of Adam is safely painted on the ceiling. You’re definitely in the wrong art museum here.
Why does ID seem so right to you?
http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?id=creationism-feels-right-but-that-doesnt-make-it-so&SID=mail&sc=emailfriend
Are you collecting academic credit for trolling and posting here? Please read this, and then go trolling elsewhere.
RAmen
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one word: win
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NICE!
You should add (somewhere on the checks) words to the effect of “by cashing this check you are affirming your faith in the FSM as the one and only true deity.” Then write a check for a dollar (or some other chickenshit amount) and send it to one of those violent “family values” repub politicians.
While a mischievous act as such may normally anger the FSM, I think He could look past this “sin”. After all, I spent all last night drinking lots of beer and looking at strippers. After such a holy act, surely the FSM can cut me a little slack?
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Dear Wigglyfiggle,
EFF OFF!!! We don’t come to your sacred places of worship and tell you how utterly incompetent you are! So leave us alone!
Also, I don’t belive anyone mentioned that you should chose a “Real Religion” In case you haven’t noticed, this site is dedicated to the satire of religion. We are making fun of it, not participating in it. Hence, you are an incompetent a$$ hole.
Another point I’d like to share: Michelangelo was a non-believer/heretic that painted for the Vatican as a means to support himself only. There are many counts of the allusions and symbology that he left in many churches as well as throughout the Vatican. So, get over yourself! Michelangelo’s would probably be full of pride if he was here today to see us use his art to stick it to the church!
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Crikeys! You guys really flogged old Wiggleyfiggle with the proverbial wet noodle! A little charity, fellow pastafarians, for the ignorant blasphemer. Spread a little love and marinara sauce on behalf of the Great Noodly One! Really, WF, you did come off like quite the moron here, but there is forgiveness to be found in the meatballs so round, the noodles so squiggly, FSM can even forgive Wiggly(figgle).
AAAARRRRGGGG
Jolly Roger
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Since this is my first time here, is there some ritual I have to go through to join this church? It really seems like my cup of tea, er, sauce.
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This is totally disgusting. I’ve been a FSM true believer for nearly 40 years, and I can assure you that the FSM NEVER EVER WROTE A CHECK. This is just stupid ass commercialization. May you burn in his sauce at an eternal simmer. Or her sauce. I’m hoping you’re just ignorant, but if not, I hope you burn in his (or her) sauce at a ROLLING BOIL.
Love and Peace,
Zipgator
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OMFSM, not only is that impressive, I notices that this is MY credit union!
Arrr, He makes his presence know to us all, me hearties. The Great Noodley One splashes hisself aboot like sauce on the poopdeck.
The Noodles
The Sauce
And The Holy Meatballs
RAmen
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lake mary, eh?
you wouldnt happen to know david, from after the dentist, would you?
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Haha. This is awesome! When I get new checks (whichever millenium that may be!), I’m gonna get this too!
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I just wanted to let you know that I copied Bradley’s brilliant idea.
Checks identical to the one pictured above (except, obviously, for name, account number, etc.) are now being exchanged for goods and services in rural north Louisiana.
My new FSM checks started with check number 651. I can’t wait to see which lucky vendor gets FSM check 666.
If I ever run out of checks again, I think I’m going with a pirate theme. Maybe something by Howard Pyle with the over-signature line, “Arrrrrrgh! Don’t touch me booty!”
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Consider your idea STOLEN!
I am going to steal it for when my checks come up for re-printing. It might happen before I die!
That is priceless!
What about one of those Capitol One custom image cards?!?!?! Would that look great on one of them, or what? Maybe a Piratefish? Who knows.
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Which service did you guys use? I can’t find one that will allow me to have the “Touched by his noodly appendage” line.
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I used unique checks, google that, it should be the first one.
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Thanks! Order placed.
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As a banker of over 35 years, I am much impressed with your creativity and may just have to copy you! Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery…
Very Kewl!
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