i feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed

Published July 17th, 2009 by Bobby Henderson

OH MY FUCKING GOD! THIS IS SO FUNNY! Seriously, I feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed to believe in this bullshit! Come on! I’m not gonna have a 10 pages long document telling that this religion is bullshit (just as all other religions), but come on! Spaghetti is invented by humans! A fucking flyinh spaghetti monster! Just think about it for a second… A flying spaghetti monster. Do you know why this stupid religion was made? Because some guys wanted to show the world how easy it is to brainwash idiots. When it was published, the brainwashed people refused to accept it, and kept on believing in a fucking, flying spaghetti monster! Oh my god! And ofcourse the amount of pirates is sinking! THEY ARE BEING KILLED! And ofcourse the temperature is rising! WE ARE ON THE TOP OF A TEMPERATURE CURVE, and in about 100 years, the temperature will start to sink again. But there will still be as many “pirates”. This is all so fucking bullshit. Come on. In one million years from now, some students making a cult for fun is gonna say that the world was made 100 years ago or something similar to this shit. But come on. We are alive now, aren’t we? But in a thousand years (or 50) this religion will be forgotten, and people will start believing in other stupid religions, such as “The Farting Chocolate Dude”. And come on. Muslims and christians believe so much in god and stuff that they would kill themselves for their “gods”. But you know that those religions are bullshit. They know that the flying spaghetti monster is bullshit. Ok, now I’m gonna guess that your name is “Mark” and now let’s pretend “Mark” is the person reading this. Mark first believes in god, and he believes so much in it that he would kill himself for god and jesus. Then somebody makes him believe in Allah and all that bullshit. Now Mark knows that Islam is true, and he would kill himself for allah. Then he is brainwashed to believe in the flying spaghetti monster. Now he knows that god, jesus and allah is bullshit, and now he knows that the flying spaghetti monster is real. COME ON! It’s not like whatever religion you believe in is the one that is right about it all. It’s not like first, god and jesus exists in some heaven, then you change religion, now god and jesus doesn’t exist anymore, now the flying spaghetti monster / the farting chocolate dude is real.

Come on. It is all in your brains. You have been listening to masters in brainwashing for a long time and now you actually believe in something as stupid as a dinner invented by humans for not long ago made the fucking universe. A dinner. With meat and spice on. Come on dudes. What the fuck?

Think again

-Magnus



319 Responses to “i feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed”

  1. Clem says:

    I don’t think you quite get it.

  2. Billy Bob says:

    Science was invented by humans also. Many people are brainwashed by the FDA. Eat like an undisciplined swine and take your medications because those medications are all based on studies and research and shown effective, the two catch words of the day that get people listening. So let’s create poisons and remedies and watch people suffer. Many make all the rich folks, those doctors, lawyers, and CEO’s richer by the minute. Go to the doctor! You need an professional to live! Pretty much all of your emotions are made by other humans. Love is invented by humans. Humans are pretty dumb all the way around for inventing cars, drilling for oil, making cigarettes, making drugs, atomic bombs, and on and on. There’s really nothing in the Bible that says to go out and kill someone or go to a country where Christians are hated and get yourself killed for kicks. You believe in the Spaghetti Monster more than I do, since you introduced it to me.

    • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

      True, people invented science and mathematics, but these are merely constructs to explain and control our environment. Scientific and Mathematic rules are postulated and repeatedly tested before they’re accepted as truth. Religion has no such testing mechanism. If you want to say that religion is distinct from science and that we’ll never prove or disprove the existence of god because he exists apart from our physical world, that’s fine by me. However, that means he/she/it/them is/are excluded from scientific discussions. QED.

  3. Thomas L. Nielsen says:

    To Billy Bob, @274, June 16th, 2010

    “There’s really nothing in the Bible that says to go out and kill someone…..”???

    Really? Have you actually READ the thing? E.g. Deuteronomy (the Amalekites are to be wiped out – as in “genocide”, stubborn and rebellious sons to be stoned, a woman who is not a virgin upon marriage to be stoned….)? Or the Book of Joshua, in the dsecribtion of the Battle of Jericho (the city was completely destroyed, and every man, woman, and child in it was killed – and this is described as something commendable)?

    I dare anyone to find examples of FSM (may He touch us all with his noodly appendages) encouraging anything even remotely like that (“Just play nice” as the Holy Gospel says).

    Regards & all,

    Thomas L. Nielsen
    Luxembourg

    • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

      Sounds like Bob Dylan wrote the Old Testament: “Everybody must get stoned!”

      • Keith says:

        Well, the O/T is full of long and tedious phrases. I suppose Bob Dylan did write it.

  4. bruceo says:

    Billy Bob #274:
    “There’s really nothing in the Bible that says to go out and kill someone”???!
    Have you ever even read any PART of the Bible? You are about to be INUNDATED with Bible quotes that command us to kill people.

  5. Flynn says:

    Seriously, “come on”. Just “come on”

  6. The Noodley Appendage says:

    Buy yourself a dictionary, (as I can tell that you don’t own one) and look up the word “satire.” Until you do this, you do not have the right to have any opinion about this. None. You have no opinion. No opinion. Opinion? No. I don’t care if you graduated from Harvard with a Master’s Degree in religion, you have no opinion. Seriously, you need to look it up. S-A-T-I-R-E. Please, inform yourself before making stupid comments.

  7. Zoro says:

    Thank you for your post Magnus.
    I would like to point out that, of course the ‘Farting Chocolate Dude’ is NOT a genuine god of any sort…he’s merely an angel of the Chocofarians, a concept stolen from the ‘coccopedians’ that dates back to a much older oppressed Aztec demi-god.
    I’m just going to plug in the brainwash machine now…back soon.
    live long and past
    Zoro

  8. DarthFennec says:

    Wait, I’m confused … So Mark is brainwashed into believing in God, and then he stops believing in God because he’s brainwashed into believe in Allah? But … isn’t `Allah’ just Arabic for `God’? So that means Mark is a twat and will let himself be rebrainwashed into believing in exactly the same deity that he was believing in anyway?
    Okay well whatever, sorry, I was going somewhere with that but I forgot where lol …

    I think it’s hilarious that people like this don’t get it. It’s as if stumbling upon a religion that sounds as ridiculous as ours was a regular occurrence for them. Or maybe they just don’t have enough confidence in that their own religion does not sound ridiculous, and therefore they immediately assume the same about us.
    I’m pretty sure that didn’t make a whole lot of sense, so again, I’m sorry. It’s late and I’m tired.

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