OH MY FUCKING GOD! THIS IS SO FUNNY! Seriously, I feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed to believe in this bullshit! Come on! I’m not gonna have a 10 pages long document telling that this religion is bullshit (just as all other religions), but come on! Spaghetti is invented by humans! A fucking flyinh spaghetti monster! Just think about it for a second… A flying spaghetti monster. Do you know why this stupid religion was made? Because some guys wanted to show the world how easy it is to brainwash idiots. When it was published, the brainwashed people refused to accept it, and kept on believing in a fucking, flying spaghetti monster! Oh my god! And ofcourse the amount of pirates is sinking! THEY ARE BEING KILLED! And ofcourse the temperature is rising! WE ARE ON THE TOP OF A TEMPERATURE CURVE, and in about 100 years, the temperature will start to sink again. But there will still be as many “pirates”. This is all so fucking bullshit. Come on. In one million years from now, some students making a cult for fun is gonna say that the world was made 100 years ago or something similar to this shit. But come on. We are alive now, aren’t we? But in a thousand years (or 50) this religion will be forgotten, and people will start believing in other stupid religions, such as “The Farting Chocolate Dude”. And come on. Muslims and christians believe so much in god and stuff that they would kill themselves for their “gods”. But you know that those religions are bullshit. They know that the flying spaghetti monster is bullshit. Ok, now I’m gonna guess that your name is “Mark” and now let’s pretend “Mark” is the person reading this. Mark first believes in god, and he believes so much in it that he would kill himself for god and jesus. Then somebody makes him believe in Allah and all that bullshit. Now Mark knows that Islam is true, and he would kill himself for allah. Then he is brainwashed to believe in the flying spaghetti monster. Now he knows that god, jesus and allah is bullshit, and now he knows that the flying spaghetti monster is real. COME ON! It’s not like whatever religion you believe in is the one that is right about it all. It’s not like first, god and jesus exists in some heaven, then you change religion, now god and jesus doesn’t exist anymore, now the flying spaghetti monster / the farting chocolate dude is real.
Come on. It is all in your brains. You have been listening to masters in brainwashing for a long time and now you actually believe in something as stupid as a dinner invented by humans for not long ago made the fucking universe. A dinner. With meat and spice on. Come on dudes. What the fuck?
Think again
-Magnus
i feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed
Published by Bobby Henderson July 17th, 2009 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 227 Comments
227 Responses to “i feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed”
Oh My Effing FSM!!!! Does anyone else see the irony in the fact that a letter based on the denouncement of religion in general starts with “OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!” ? That’s what struck me at least, be side the obvious “Do you know what satire means?”.
-RAmen
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I’m confused, I mean really confused, is Mangus able to breathe on his own or is the FSM keeping him alive for our amusement. I look forward to seeing him if Jerry Springer even returns to TV.
I just have a few questions.
Why doesn’t FSM or at least the prophet charge franchise fees on pasta manufacture’s, italian resturants and the like for using his being as a food source?
The catholics have been pulling that crap off for years with turning bread into the body of christ, turning them into cannibals as far as I’m concerned and they sent the collection plate around even though they are the richest organisation in the world.
Is there a push to get religious holidays recognised? I feel I would do a lot of worshipping in places close to our heaven (Pubs and strip clubs).
On a more serious note I do like the Kive.org idea proving just how little the FSM wants from us he wants us to give to others, has Mangus signed up I wonder or is he spending his money fighting this glorious religion?
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It’s supossed to be ironic!
DUH!
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I fart on your comment, good sir.
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WTF? God bless you! Magnus is a rancid pesto, and I am unanimous in that.
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The “Farting Chocolate Dude”..you mean my cell mate? I refuse to bow down to him, so don’t remind me!
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Hi Jack@99. Maybe you should try picking up the gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and disprvoing scientifically that the FSM doesn’t exist. I think you’d find that His Noodly Goodness does exist and is the only way to the stripper factory and beer volcano, not an eternal lake of fire. God is love, of course; why else would he say this: “I form the light and create darkness. I make peace and create evil. I the Lord do all these things.”
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In case anyone cares, I counted the phrase “come on” eight times and the word “brainwash(ed)” 5 times.
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Is the “Farting Chocolate Dude” a dude made of chocolate that farts, or a dude that farts chocolate?
Could someone please smack Magnus with a clue stick?
R’Amen.
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Psst! Magnus! It’s called parody.
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This has got to be one of the most perfect examples of just how gullible and/or uneducated you have to be in order to be religious. It’s even called satire, yet he still thinks that people actually believe that god is a sentient meal of pasta and tasty sauce. He probably gave the global warming to pirate population ratio chart a serious once over as well.
Dude, all Pastafarians are in on this. It’s a grand joke. Just like every other religion. Even with that said, to honestly believe in a Flying Spaghetti Monster is no more ludicrous than Christianity. I’ll use one of my favorite quotes to illustrate why.
Christianity: Believing that a Jewish zombie who was his own father sent himself down to die for the sins of mankind that were started by an animated dirt-man and rib-woman who were tricked into eating magic fruit by a talking snake. -Anonmyous
And they call us fools.
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A New York man who pleaded guilty in January to charges of aiding al Qaeda was ready to be a suicide bomber for the organization, but was told he needed more religious instruction, according to a document obtained by CNN on Thursday.
Hey, Magnus: go bother the “instructors”, if you want to do something constructive.
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Hail his extraordinary Browness, the Farting Chocolate Dude, may all fall down and worship at his Holy Bubbly Vat. Spaghetti monster, though art a FALSE GOD. get thee gone back to the slimy depths of Napoli and do not tempt us with your noodly appendages and succulent meatballs again.
For I will follow those sweet fragrant chocolately botty burps until a new even more tempting deity comes on the scene and persuades me to.
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I am starting to think that maybe those hate-mails were written in the sole purpose to give people a good laugh and keep them writing comments. Hard to believe that someone would actually mean what is written in those hate-mails.. You don’t even have to read the open letter to understand the real purpose of the FSM, just seeing the first page of the website does that job.. interesting how people think, or to what point their beliefs can filter their environment.. They even forgot that Jesus was also known as the great pirate BlueBeard.
Yoho.
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Did any of what he said make sense to any of you? He seemed to contradict himself, is he saying all religions are bullshit?
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haha…..ummm….all hail TCFD. comical comment, i hope hes still able to walk after that rant. :)
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Is it true …. Pastafarism isn’t a real relligion ? Damn ! Again I was dupped by mean people who can’t think of other things then brainwash me and steal all my money ! I mean it’s the 9th time this week that I joined a new relligion ! When will I get it ?
By the way , what’s the website about the FCD ? If the Mighty FSM isn’t real I need a new replacement … I mean come on I can’t live without a deity telling me my every moves during the day !
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Dear Magnus
Here are a few words that will make you smarter and help you breathe more easily
Any religion the inspires you have a full life and do your very best to care about others is a good religion.
Now, only one is valid.
Put a smile on your face, invite a friend, parent or lover over for some pasta, share your love and accept His glorius presence, full of joy in your body and spirit.
Your life will then really begin.
R’Amen
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You, sir, are a dumb ass.
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Swing and a miss
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If he is bright enough to be Atheist, then he is also bright enough to know what a satire is, the mail is fake.
God damn attention whores.
Ramen
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#92 Olax
I agree that there are stupid atheists. I agree that there are intelligent christians. But I don’t agree that “there’s an equal percentage of non-believers as stupid as you think all Christians are”.
Some statistics seems to show that education and religiosity are inversely correlated.
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I didn’t even have to read all of this, in fact I couldn’t even stay interested long enough, to realize how stupid this guy is. And someone wasn’t paying attention in class when satire was being discussed.
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It is absolutely true that there are stupid atheists. Olax himself is the best example.
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People,
Magnus seems to bee another one of those dimwitted losers that can’t tell that FSMism is another one of those net.religions that’s intended to make fun of a real religion. Most of these hate-mails fall into this category. I sometimes wonder why Bobby continues to post this BS. Has he never seen the phrase “flames to /dev/null”? Robert, ignore it! If you don’t post it they can’t get their jollies you ignorant fool! I realize evangelicals sometimes act like they’re inbred, but really.
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I feel bad for the people who think this religious is serious, I also pity those whose own personal faith is so weak, that they feel threatened by Pastafarianism.
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My cheeks hurt… A lot! This is the best thing that I have ever read. Farting Chocolate Dude. My face hurts. Dope. The hate mail cannot be real.
Ramen
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I believe in FCD! He is all powerful.
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I read most of the responses here and am extremely discouraged by the stupidity of most of the submitters. They are too ignorant to understand the message that this satire is crying out. The Pirate’s and global warming is a perfect example of the trash the government and the media try’s to feed us.
I am all for FSM as it makes just as much sense as any other beliefs.
People are so stupid that they even voted for Obama thinking they would never have to work again
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Hi Bob, I missed it when president Obama promised that those who voted for him would never have to work again, would you mind pointing out to me when the memo went out?
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Insightful Ape,
Bob never said that Obama promised that people would never have to work again. He was simply stating that there were people stupid enough to *think* (based on no fact) that if Obama was elected that would be the case. I have actually heard people say this.
RAmen
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Sure, Jesso. People can be delsuional. But did he or his supporters ever lead anyone to believe that?
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I voted for Obama, hoping I would never have to work again, but only because I didn’t want McCain to become president since he planned to deport anyone who wasn’t a wealthy, white, heterosexual, christian and invade another middle eastern country for oil.
RAmen
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No, Obama never did anything to lead people to believe that. I already stated that when I said “there were people stupid enough to *think* (BASED ON NO FACT) that if Obama was elected…” yada.
But yes, his supporters (we are talking ordinary people, not those actually involved in the campaign or any of his officials) did say those things. Like this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P36×8rTb3jI
Quote “I won’t have to worry about putting gas in my car. I won’t have to worry about paying my mortgage”. I also did read the comments under the video, and I in no way condone any of that bigoted nonsense. Will someone please assure me that one day we will figure out that skin color doesn’t fucking matter?!?
Belief, whether based on fact or not, is a powerful thing. But you know that. That is why you come here.
I didn’t want either of them as president. I am sick of all career politicians, and I think we should vote them all out.
RAmen
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How funny it is that you would mention The Farting Chocolate Dude. He is a young deity, but has managed to make his way to the internet to be adored. He thanks you for the name-drop and spouts a chocolate fart your way.
fartingchocolatedude.org
RAmen
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How did you know my name is Mark? This must be divine intervention. You have been touched by Our Lord and he wispered my name to you.
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Mmm… ignorant tard who probably hasn’t heard of global warming. Temperature curve… one that the world has never seen the likes of perhaps…
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aww, he doesnt get it! he says he thinks all religion is bullshit, ergo he is an atheist. he’s one of us, but he’s stupid enough to think we’re serious. come on dude, join us. it’s a MICKEY-TAKE.
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Yes, because this makes perfect sence.
PS. I secretly worship the FSM.
RAmen. May the sauce be with you.
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Hahahaha the irony of how this email is calling us all stupid is brilliant!
Although I’m afraid the joke might be lost on him :(
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Clearly mangus, you have no idea what a parody is, or a joke, or even how to write write witout repeting everything needlessly, or what a parody is. Nor have you or anyone else who writes these hate mails read the letter to the kansas school board, or know what a joke is.
It seems you have been brainwashed by the bloody green idiots and the league of talking in riddles and bullshit and refusing to believe what a parody is.
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I can only pray for you.
Blessed is the Pastafarian.
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Are you “mark”?
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I’ll give Magnus one point. Spaghetti was invented by humans. And humans were invented by the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Agreed? All hail his NOODLEYNESS! Thank FSM!
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Hahaha I didn’t even read this whole letter because it was too long winded and I got bored….
I just absolutely LOVE it when people completely miss the point, nobody is brainwashed, it is us who are of high intelligence and people who don’t understand our satire who are getting all worked up and making fools of themselves! Always makes me smile when they show off their stupidity like this! We are making a valid point!
All hail our mighty noodely one! RAmen :8E
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I couldnt even finish all the loud hateful dribble coming out of his keyboard, may you see the sauce and be touched by His noodly appendage
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Remember magnus, All Is PastaBowl. Even you. May you be touched His Noodliness.
RAmen.
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“Muslims and christians believe so much in god and stuff that they would kill themselves for their “gods”.”
Is this suggesting that we, as FSMists, would not die for His Noodliness?!
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@ 148 – bugs – ,
The FSM has been able to take care of him/herself since creation. Any of our deaths for ideological grounds would be a waste and a victory for the hate-mailers. Remember the eight I’d-Really-Rather-You-Didn’ts where killing for the FSM is forbidden. That includes suicide.
RAmen
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Maybe you should stop using the words shit and bull shit because they were used way too many times. Why don’t you just respect other’s beliefs and back off.
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