OH MY FUCKING GOD! THIS IS SO FUNNY! Seriously, I feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed to believe in this bullshit! Come on! I’m not gonna have a 10 pages long document telling that this religion is bullshit (just as all other religions), but come on! Spaghetti is invented by humans! A fucking flyinh spaghetti monster! Just think about it for a second… A flying spaghetti monster. Do you know why this stupid religion was made? Because some guys wanted to show the world how easy it is to brainwash idiots. When it was published, the brainwashed people refused to accept it, and kept on believing in a fucking, flying spaghetti monster! Oh my god! And ofcourse the amount of pirates is sinking! THEY ARE BEING KILLED! And ofcourse the temperature is rising! WE ARE ON THE TOP OF A TEMPERATURE CURVE, and in about 100 years, the temperature will start to sink again. But there will still be as many “pirates”. This is all so fucking bullshit. Come on. In one million years from now, some students making a cult for fun is gonna say that the world was made 100 years ago or something similar to this shit. But come on. We are alive now, aren’t we? But in a thousand years (or 50) this religion will be forgotten, and people will start believing in other stupid religions, such as “The Farting Chocolate Dude”. And come on. Muslims and christians believe so much in god and stuff that they would kill themselves for their “gods”. But you know that those religions are bullshit. They know that the flying spaghetti monster is bullshit. Ok, now I’m gonna guess that your name is “Mark” and now let’s pretend “Mark” is the person reading this. Mark first believes in god, and he believes so much in it that he would kill himself for god and jesus. Then somebody makes him believe in Allah and all that bullshit. Now Mark knows that Islam is true, and he would kill himself for allah. Then he is brainwashed to believe in the flying spaghetti monster. Now he knows that god, jesus and allah is bullshit, and now he knows that the flying spaghetti monster is real. COME ON! It’s not like whatever religion you believe in is the one that is right about it all. It’s not like first, god and jesus exists in some heaven, then you change religion, now god and jesus doesn’t exist anymore, now the flying spaghetti monster / the farting chocolate dude is real.
Come on. It is all in your brains. You have been listening to masters in brainwashing for a long time and now you actually believe in something as stupid as a dinner invented by humans for not long ago made the fucking universe. A dinner. With meat and spice on. Come on dudes. What the fuck?
Think again
-Magnus
i feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed
Published by Bobby Henderson July 17th, 2009 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 227 Comments
227 Responses to “i feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed”
Uh, Magnus? Perhaps you should find out what’s really going on here before you start a long rambling treatise, preaching to the choir (pun intended). Start with the “About” tab, look up “satire” on dictionary.com, then enjoy a hearty plate of pasta.
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So… this is either a troll or a complete idiot?
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Nice hate-mail! Thanks for your ignorance Magnus!
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whoa yeah i think someone might have slightly missed the mark on that one
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I believe! i believe in flying pasta! YES! wahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
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I’m always amazed at the stupidity of people who write this hate mail. It just gets better every day! The truly sad part is that this kind of ignorance has the SAME VOTE that I do! If you are too stupid to understand a concept as simple as satire, how can you make an informed decision about anything else in your life.
Oh wait, this explains how we got George W. Bush!
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Haha, you don’t get it Magnus, you just don’t get it…
Explore this website and feel silly…
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“Now look, he’s not the Farting Chocolate Dude he’s a very naughty boy!”
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All hail the Farting Chocolate Dude, my new god and his High Priest Magnus!
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hold the sauce, magnus? FSM isn’t real? i’ve been duped again? dammit, guess it’s time for xenu.
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…I don’t know what to do.
On one hand, Maggy here is obviously more literate and together then 90% of what our usual hate-spewers are. On the other hand, he is being exceedingly dense. Whether on purpose or not, I’m not sure.
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UUUUH he was sooooo close. but still…
the sore for the non-satire-understanding people rises.
I think instead of ID they should be teaching what satire is. Many ppl. could use that.
@Magnus: read again. think again. try again. believe again. and perhaps you will understand what we’re doing here.
May his noodly appendages touch you all.
RAmen
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OK. That settles it. Someone *has* to start up a church of The Farting Chocolate Dude!
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As the #1 said, piss off, sober up, read up on satire and then go throw yourself in a river or something.
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Hey Magnus.
Think again, please. You are right that all religions are bullshit. Even this one. But you must read the Open Letter to the Kansas Board of Ed. Then you will understand. The fact that any pastafarian acts a certain way is simple: we are just mimicking other religions in the hopes that they “get it/” In fact, most of us are atheists, at least I am. I figured out the lie when I was 8.
Rum and pasta are the bread and water of our lives.
Brian
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Thank you Magnus. I now realise the error of my ways and that this religion is not, in fact true. It was your careful use of CAPITAL LETTERS and persuasive arguments like “Come on dudes. What the fuck?” which revealed the truth unto me. I hadn’t realised that the number of pirates was sinking, (or was it the pirates that were sinking?) until you elucidated it so well. I had also been labouring under the misapprehension that we hadn’t reached the top of the teperature curve. I’m so pleased to know that global warming will now reverse.
Sadly I had already given away all my property to become the first pastafarian hermit before your revelation. I am grateful though, to hear about The Farting Chocolate Dude and will look into Him. Have you been a disciple for long?
Actually, another, even worse thought occurs to me. What if Pastafarianism isn’t a real religion at all and was simply made up as a sort of satirical joke to parody the idiocies of the existing established religions? Surely no intelligent person like you or me could be taken in by such a facile sham! Wouldn’t we look silly if we’d believed that it was a real religion with real followers! Doesn’t bear thinking about really.
May the The Farting Chocolate Dude waft Aeros in your face.
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Magnus,
I would like to know more about this “Farting Chocolate Dude” you speak of. The FCD sounds like my kind of religion. Can you direct me to His scriptures???
Lolz
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Magnus is pulling our collective noddlely appendages.
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Fakest hate mail I ever saw. Nobody’s really that dumb.
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Hey Magnus, you really should stop sniffing glue. That’s bad for you.
Also, don’t forget to call in a refill for your lithium, because it’s running low.
May the sauce be with you.
RAmen
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I think Magnus needs to check his dosage levels…..very sad.
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Errrrrr, I’m sorry, what? Could you repeat that?
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Wow. This guy has no brain.
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Yo, Magnus. Less talkee, more readee. Possibly along with a generous helping of thinkee.
Look into it.
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Come on Mags. I mean just come on. You don’t get the satire? Come on man. You’re just gonna Come on our website and say all that without looking around to try and see whats going (coming) on? Come on dude. Maybe after a little research you’ll Come on over to our side but until then just keep your mouth shut. I mean come on. Although I did like your suggestion about a Chocolate farting dude, that could gather a real following. Nah nevermind, I mean Come on that’s too crazy.
Coming on,
The Danimal
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Dude, catch up with the rest of us. We’re way ahead of you.
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Sadly, I have no witty comebacks or interesting facts that would make everything you just wrote sound dumb. The good news is I don’t need them, because everything you just wrote sounded dumb :) VICTORY!!!
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It`s amazing how nobody seems to read the open letter. Lets ad some flashing lights so people know that it wasn`t created
And if you`re going to use the big boy curse words, at the very least stop using the col. .
Ramen
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It`s amazing how nobody seems to read the open letter. Lets ad some flashing lights so people know that it wasn`t created `Because some guys wanted to show the world how easy it is to brainwash idiots.`
And if you`re going to use the big boy curse words, at the very least stop using the col. `brainwashing`.
Ramen
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*is literally rolling on the floor laughing*
I guess dear Magnus will feel like a real dumbass when he will discover the real truth behind this site.
Dear confused Magnus, why don’t you start with reading ‘the open letter to the Kansas school board’? Maybe, you will get the point behind the site, and maybe, just maybe if you have a little bit of humor in your big toe, you will join the wonderful world of the Pastafarians and will embrace our Noodle Master.
RAmen
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Medication.
You need it,
You should take it.
….. every day.
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Magnus, you’re an idiot. All the regulars here get the point much better than do you.
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Complete fail.
*sigh*
Reading is truly a lost art.
RAmen
ET
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Im beginning to think people should have to click the “I have read and understand the open letter” button, before they can leave drivel like this. It would help us eliminate these misunderstandings and also help those who might not be complete idiots….be well… as embarassed if/when they do get it.
Magnus, you are almost there buddy, Come on back, slow down a bit, browse the site some, and you may (or may not) get the gist of the program. You look like you may have the makings of a fine Pastafarian!
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wall of text hits you for 94646146 damage
you die
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Magnus – I think you have just redefined the word “Fail”, you fail on so many levels, even the trolling level.
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All hail the farting chocolate dude!
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Well, Magnus, that was a nice rant. At least we know you’re not one of the usual Christian hate-mailers…you apparently distribute your hate evenly among all mankind.
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I like your “Farting Chocolate Dude” religion. Is He/She semi-sweet, dark, or milk chocolate? Do His/Her farts smell like fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies? You are obscene and dumb, but you have an active imagination.
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ATSAP REVOL The Magnificent
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Blasphemy!! Do not question the authority of His Noodliness lest you wish for stale beer and strippers with VD!
REPENT
RAmen
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d’uh !
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Looks fake to me. Anyway, in case it’s not, one thing to note: we DO NOT believe in this, and it would do some people good to learn the meaning of the word “satire”.
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It’s amazing how some long roads lead to nowhere. Magnus, I have a tip for you: Read first, then comment. You will avoid looking foolish that way.
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Well, Magnus must be really serious, he said “Come on” eight times.
The Chocolate Farting Dude soungs intriguing, though.
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I hope that this is not the Magnus I think it is. If it is he surely has us firmly by the leg.
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Wow, you sir are a dumbass. You obviously aren’t familiar with this thing at all. Hell, look at the barnes and noble ad for the gospel: “An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It’s even wackier than Jonathan Swift’s suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old “out-of-work physics major,” puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. — Scientific American”
Satire. Not religion.
We’re not brainwashed. You’re an idiot.
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It actually hurt to read that.
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While youre in the dictionary, look up “irony” as well.
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Maybe You are the one who has been brainwashed. Long live F.S.M.!
RAmen! PaperclipMan22
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Yeah, so as much intelligence as you seem to have, you seem to have the same problem as my elementary school students. Reading directions. On the home page, there is a big “If you are new to the site start here”. That here is a different color and underlined because it is called a link. Why don’t you start there, and then come back for dinner. I have enough breadsticks to share :)
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LOL!!!! theFewtheProudtheMarinara:) I was going to say basically the same thing. Mmmmm……Pasta good!!!
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