I am a practicing Roman Catholic. And I am also 13 years old. I was on Yahoo Answers and found a question about “The Flying Spaghetti Monster” So, I clicked on it. I probably shouldn’t have but when the link finished loading, I almost cried. Its hard enough for me to have faith in God already, I’m the type of person who needs to have things proven to them, but I just found your site… Disgusting for lack of a better word. I also heard that you made this site because you wanted to get back at the Kansas School Committee or something. I am hoping and praying that this is a true fact, and that you really don’t believe in this. I know this is wrong of me to say. People should believe in whatever they want, but really, looking at some of the articles that you have written, It seems that your site is more of an “In your face” thing to the Christians saying “Haha, we can make a religion just as easy as you guys can, see how stupid it is now?” For example ‘Your just jealous that our god has bigger balls then yours’? Excuse me for my language, but thats just crap, again, for lack of kinder terminology.
Even so, if you made this as a joke, or something to pass the time, that doesnt mean everyone else sees it that way. I mean, come on, you have a majority of collage students believing in this, and hopefully they’ll see how stupid (excuse me for saying that, im just trying to tell you my opinion without criticizing you further then everyone else already has) this all was, and that they may want to rethink their ways, that maybe you’ve gone a little too far?
I relize this all probably sounds silly from a 13 year old, but please take this into consideration…. If this whole thing is not a joke, im sorry, but if it was bobby… Thats kind of sad.-erin
I am a practicing Roman Catholic
Published by Bobby Henderson July 3rd, 2009 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 161 Comments
161 Responses to “I am a practicing Roman Catholic”
All pastafarians!
Join me in fighting these jesus freaks. I am on http://www.topix.com and they actually have a who blogosphere about atheism. I am fighting long and hard everyday. Join me and we can take down these fools!
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Things proven to you? Okay then, Prove that “your god” Is real.
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Hey, I just want to make the point that it is very likely that this girl is 13. Some kids are really smart really young. I was the same way at her age, and if anything, she’s smarter by acknowledging that people might think it’s silly coming from someone her age. I actually used to use the same phrase, because people (I think) are more likely to listen to you if you do indeed acknowledge the fact that you might sound ridiculous, and that you can see why they’d think so. She’s just seeing from multiple perspective. Erin, keep questioning yourself and everything around you, it’s good for you. =)
Love and pasta!
-NoodlePirate
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Everyone has a right to believe it what ever they want. It just so happens that this site was made in appliance to the “FSM”, no one is forcing religion upon you erin its not like your “god” is real.
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Excuse me but It is tough enough living in a world filled with religious fanatics not to be able to express myself without some young person who(not trying to condescend, but I know I really am) thinks they know it all telling me how wrong I am, with caveats saying that they are just trying to be nice…I dont care what you have to say Erin…you obviously have it all figured out…if you are going to be a condescending shmuck…go full out and do it…dont use caveats to let people know how nice you are…because it doesnt matter how nice you are … you are still gonna die when you drink the fucking kool aid.
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Erin,
Thank you for taking the time to respond to the post, your opinion is as valuable as the creators of the FSM website…. that’s the point.
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@ #47, extending #46:
“Atheistic zealots” really ARE just as bad as the religious type. You know why? The “atheistic zealots” come on WAY TOO STRONG. When they come on strong against someone who believes something else, or even has doubts about their belief in something else, what does that someone do? They don’t listen to you, they GET DEFENSIVE. They will block out what you’re saying, retreating to a “happy place” of sorts, and may be inclined against other atheists in the future, meaning the “zealot” just caused damage that will likely take a long time to be repaired, if ever. So please, everyone: when there’s a hopeful like this, DON’T BE A HARDLINER!
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SteveoFromTheB #51: I know what you mean!
Just go to http://www.saffronplanet.net for some real fruit-loops…
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If you practice enough – you may get it right!
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For the love of all that is Durum Semolina, that is the best argument in flavor of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti that I ever have read! I love: “Your God has bigger balls…” – PRICELESS.
Of course, it wouldn’t be the first fake to be deemed priceless. ;)
RAmen
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Hello:
Im assuming that you havent read “The God Delusion”? you should read it, its like the bible for the athiests. I recommend it, its somthing you should enjoy. I read the bible and the stories in principle is creative, but thats all they are stories. Im sorry if i have offended you in any sort of way (which i probably have) but I hope you can try to understand me….you dont have to ofcourse considering you are sitting ata different desk, but still. I guess its cool to believe in somthing and i do belive in somthing, not God but chance. you’ll probably think its ridiculous but then again it is probably as ridiculous as your belief. Im not hating anyone for there beliefs or implimenting it in any sort of way.
good luck
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“Its hard enough for me to have faith in God already, I’m the type of person who needs to have things proven to them…”
Faith and reason are not incompatible with eachother. Adhere to faith in a bigger force acting outside of yourself if you want to; but for the love of God, in the process of it don’t be arrogant and don’t under any circumstances believe that whatever you believe in is true.
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Erin, don’t be afraid to keep asking questions. It is wrong to believe 100% in something that doesn’t make any sense to you. If you don’t get the answers you seek at church, you might want to try asking them somewhere else.
The original purpose of the FSM was to keep religion out of the public schools because the churches were hoping to cloud the thinking of the young. Schools should be teaching about how to find answers and learning about what’s really going on in the world, not making up stories to counteract the truth.
Good luck to you!
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OK People we all need to chill let people believe what they want to believe ok….Would the FSM want us to fight like animals?
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Live and let live people….OK Christianity has been around for 2000 years…People will not take kindly to Pastafarians saying that people are wrong so we should stop and let them say what they want…we will never convert the world…
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Collage students? Aren’t they art students if they’re “collage students”? Sorry little kid. I shouldn’t make fun of you. You wrote fairly eloquently for someone (allegedly) three years younger than me. I hope you find your way in life as you grow older and come to understand that all organized religions are a bunch of crap (pardon my french).
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Gunner – christianity has not been around for 2000 years. Catholism has been. Christianity is a newer movement.
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you know albert einstine once said something along the lines of “if you take the prophts of juidism and Christ from christainty, what is left is the cure of all socal illness” what people seem to forget is that what christainty really boils down to isn’t the rituals, rules, the converting people how don’t belive what you do, or even god, but the message of love. I just don’t see why you need to worship a god that most people only belive in because its been hammered in there head every Sunday of there life, or becouse they been scared into beliving by stories of hell, to spread that message.
Ramen
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Erin,
Firstly, don’t be afraid to capitalise the first letter of your name. It will give you an obviously much needed boost to your self-esteem. Then, you can confidently begin to research your beliefs properly. If you are indeed ‘the type of person who needs to have things proven to them’ then you are already half way there to following the FSM with confidence. After all, his Noodly Holiness only wants for us to see the truth in scientific ways, where ‘things are proven.’
Yours,
-Booze Hound
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Let me help you with some vocabulary here as you mention several times that you lacked the proper wording:
“Disgusting for lack of a better word”
You could also have tried: vile, horrible, foul, rankerous, abhorrent, repugnant, odious, wretched, despicable, detestable, etc. There are plenty of words that are similar to “disgusting” if you wish to find a better one. I suggest bookmarking a good online thesaurus, they are extremely helpful when trying to come up with the proper wording, or when you forgot a word but can remember what it means (and we all hate it when that happens).
“Excuse me for my language, but thats just crap, again, for lack of kinder terminology.”
Instead of “thats just crap” you could try, “I question the accuracy of this” or “I don’t think there is any evidence that supports your theories.” Similarly you could try, “that is not an acceptable standpoint.” All of these are kinder alternatives to your choice of “crap”. If you really must make the fecal connection you could always go with, “that’s just anaerobically decomposing organic waste”.
“…hopefully they’ll see how stupid (excuse me for saying that, im just trying to tell you my opinion without criticizing you further then everyone else already has)…”
A less obviously judging way of phrasing that would have been “hopefully they will see the inaccuracy of their current beliefs” or “it is my hope that those who do believe in the FSM will come to realize the false nature of their idealogy”. You could even go with, “Due to the percieved inaccuracy of your belief system, it is my hope that you will abandon your theology for one that is more acceptable.” All of these are much more polite, albiet with the same general level of judgement behind them. But, in this case it would be hard to change the vocabulary to being less judgemental without changing the meaning behind your sentence.
The English language has a plethora of words and combinations that can provide you with kinder terminology should you take the time to search for it. I wish you luck in your search for a kinder, gentler vocabulary. Otherwise you could also stop appologizing for telling it like you see it; I mean we sure don’t appologize for writing about our beliefs here. Either way, you’re writing will be stronger when you do less to undermine your own points.
In love and noodles,
Pastafarian Taco.
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I am only 14 years old, and when I found this site, I became enlightened
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Dear Brothers and Sisters,
I am from Nepal and a very recent convert. Looking at how scientific, logical, and practical FSM is, I could not but be impressed by it. But that is not why I converted. When I saw the Image of His Noodliness, I believe he communicated to me by some extrasensory means, and I had this unjustifiable urge to read the Holy Gospel, and thus I became Enlightened.
However, I have a slight problem. In my country people will refuse to be enlightened if the ‘Church’ part of our holy place is included here. Therefore, fellow believers, I propose a ‘Temple of Flying Spagetti’ so that even the unblessed ones from my country may be enlightened. Could anyone please tell the Holy Fathers about that please.
Again, I am very thankful to His Noodliness for enlightening me and treating my cousin from Terminal stage of CAncer, and giving eyesight to my Grandmother…
Sincerely,
Nepali Believer
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hey catholic girl. don’t believe any of the FSM crap. it’s rotten. you are very smart and your response was very well written. way to stick up for yourself. I know it’s tough trying to figure stuff out. I’m a Christian, not a Catholic. To me, God is all about relationship, not about saying Hail Mary’s and doing good to get into heaven. Grab a Holy Bible, you know, a REAL one, and read it for yourself. It’s filled with God’s promises and love for you. He has a purpose and a plan for your life and He will tell you what it is. You just have to ask Him, trust Him and Obey Him. love ya girl! Maybe one day I’ll see you in heaven.
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Lol.
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Ja (#73) said: “God is all about relationship, not about saying Hail Mary’s and doing good to get into heaven”.
This is my greatest problem with Christians. The hell with DOING GOOD? Just wear your piety on your sleeve and bend everyone else’s ear about your “personal relation with gawd”. The church of do-as-I-say, not-as-I-do is USELESS, ja. It’s like mastrubation for the soul. Might make YOU feel good, but accomplishes nothing.
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Now, now ja. You want her to be a Christian. Don’t tell her to pick up a Bible. That’s the opposite of what you’re trying to do. Reading that piece of filth you call “The Good Book” is like having your anus ripped out with searing tongs which have been covered with salt and hot sauce. How you can believe that, I don’t know. It defies all logic and understanding. Whereas the FSM has proof and evidence!
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@#72 Nepali Believer
I agree. I wish that there were a physical church I could go to, that I might converse in person with like-minded people and swap pasta recipes. I think the neighborhood mormons are starting are to get annoyed with me showing up at church every week in full pirate regalia, but going to church is literally the only way one can stay connected in my state :(
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Ja (#73) is yet another example of a Christian who is scared of another Christian asking questions. We wouldn’t want people doing something like that… Asking questions is a great way for people to figure out that Christianity (you can insert any religion there) is a bunch of BS. Couldn’t have that.
Erin, keep asking questions. Keep wondering. Never close your mind because there are endless possibilities. And don’t accept offerings of love from people like Ja. Their love is predicated on whether or not you believe like they do. If you change your mind, Ja will stop loving you and start condemning you to hell. Pastafarians will accept you no matter what.
In Peace and Sauciness,
D&WC
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I can’t believe that people don’t get satire. Keep up the good work, RAmen!
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Look, whoever you are, I’m a 13-year-old who believes religiously in the FSM and have for a very long time. I suspect that you have simply not matured enough to realize that no one here at FSM is trying to convert you, personally, from your apparently very deep beliefs in Jesus and Guitar Hero, we are just here to offer a serious alternative to Roman Catholicism, Evangelism, Mormonism, and any other constricting -ism you may believe in. My mother was saved by the FSM from deep despair as a RECOVERING Catholic. we’ll keep our peace and sauciness, and you keep yours.
RAmen,
Maureen
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I love the irony in this whole thing… Poor 13 year old kid doesn’t realize that this entire “religion” is a satirical spoof on Religion. No one truly believes it.
From what I can gather there are several purposes of the CoFSM:
1. Give a good example to show that every aspect of religion is taken on faith, with NO evidence of the existence of god or any of his martyrs/Disciples/ect. It shows that a new religion can be made simply by mimicing others, because the stories and circumstances of a particular religion are considered to be unquestioned and absolute, no matter how ridiculous it seems. And that is exactly why it should not be taught in schools. It is effectively the exact opposite of teaching kids how to think for themselves.
2. Show that there are still dumb people in the world who really do not have the intelligence to sense sarcasm, irony, or any other forms of satirical humor. Especially religious people, who seem to, for the most part, have their brains switched “off”. I have to say its pretty interesting what you god fearing people have to say about another “faith” with “radically” different beliefs. lol.
3. Mock overbearing faith/religionious organizations that has been used for thousands of years by political leaders and “martyrs” to start wars, spread ignorance, death, corruption, and fear.
There is nothing wrong with faith. Faith has its place in society just like a lot of other things do. Everyone needs something to believe in. However, faith and religion are too entirely different things. There are personal beliefs, and then there are beliefs in which are pressured on other people in order to expand a religion through an age old method of scare tactics and propaganda. Thats were teaching religion in schools comes an issue. Kids should be taught only what we know for a fact, or all known faiths and systems of universal understanding so that they can make their own intelligent decisions when they get out in the real world.
The whole thing was designed to mock blatant, blind ignorance in something that cannot be proven, yet is so ruthlessly defended.
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Ah, but our god has bigger MEATBALLS than yours!
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Oh come on, cut the crap. So she’s 13, so what? I’m 12, and I’ve been going on this website since I was 10. I have the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster at home and everything. Honestly, reading this DID make me feel a little bad. But does it ever occur to these types of people that anyone reading about a religion different from theirs may take offense and feel alienated? Did this 13-year-old ever come across the idea that we have the right to be expressing our feelings about religion? And even if it is a joke, if it offends people it just goes to show how uptight those people are about religion, and how intolerant they are of the beliefs (real or fake) of others.
On a softer note, I appreciate how hard Erin tried to tell us her feelings without being a blubbering idiot or spewing out insultes, unlike the much older (but clearly not more mature) intolerant hate-mail posters.
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Dear Fellow Believers,
I was thinking of opening a blog on the ‘Temple of the Flying Spaghetti Monster’…Would dat be a good idea? Anyone know of any blogs related to this? Also, if there’s a Hindu anywhere around, would anyone mind helping me adapt the principles to Hinduism?
Prophet Bobby, if you read this, is it okay if I do that? Could you help me?
Nepal needs to be touched by His Holy Appendages too…
Nepali Believer
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Erin
“Its hard enough for me to have faith in God already, I’m the type of person who needs to have things proven to them”
It’s normal to have doubts about any religion, it only means that you have an inquisitive mind. I can only suggest you to go further in your study, whatever conclusion you reach. I may suggest you also that you decide what is a “proof” for you, and if it applies to belief systems
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There are more important issues at hand. Your souls! I urge any and all who see this post to read my free e-book, “Stealing the Keys to Heaven.” It’s about a 4 hour read & well worth the time. You can ‘google’ it at your leisure. God bless!
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I think people keep missing the REAL point of FSM. The point is this–if you are going to teach creationism than who’s version of creationism do you teach? There are many more than just the Christian version. I think that religion belongs at home, not in school and not in government. The whole point Bobby was trying to make is that people believe in many things and it is arrogant to assume that we should automatically be taught Christian creationism. I also cannot see why people have their feelings hurt or are offended by this site or any other that does not agree with their religious beliefs. I am sure that lots of Christians make fun of Krishna, Buddha and the Great Turtle in the sky that carries the world. I really doubt they care. Sticks and stones, people! And it’s our business if we are going to Hell… let us go there if you think we are. All my friends will be there anyway… I am truly amused by people who don’t get it and attack our “beliefs.” It’s ALL just magical thinking, Baby, any way you slice it.
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Dan,
First, you are correct. You don’t have the credentials. This in itself is a part of the massive problem with religion. Any joe blow off the street can write about it or preach it, and someone will believe them. No offense to what you have written, but there should be more merit to things than “This is what I believe”. I suggest you get “The God Delusion” by Richard Dawkins who has a laundry list of accolades and a degree or two. No contradictions. Some opinions, but he will at least tell you it is his opinion. It is a mind opening experience.
Second, we do not believe in your heaven or hell. So using the soul argument doesn’t work. As a fellow Pastafarian so eloquently said about the hell argument, your god seriously overestimates his ability to intimidate me.
I look forward to my eternal beer volcano. RAmen.
D&WC
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I can’t believe someone my age could be such a moron.
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Yawn, what is about people that they just don’t seem to have a clue about anything, still what you need to do is have a nice meal of say a certain Italian dish and you will enlightened, as for the catholic church it has spent most of the last 2000 years trying to keep people from ever thinking and went to great lengths, such as the Inquisition when they used to burn people for saying things about the holy trinity or that Porn chops are a bit off.
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Does your god have meatballs too?
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I was 13 when I came to my relevation that there is no god, and wrote about that well. I’m pretty sure this kid has seen the light.
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teenybopper got her panties in a knot; what’s new
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Totally reeks of insincerity. People like that should be given extra stale beer and be sent to the crucible without their pasta
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@67
Catholicism is a form of Christianity, the movement you’re thinking of is called “Protestantism”.
@92
Me as well, give or take a few years. (Actually, I know that I was an atheist by at least 13, so I guess “Take a few years or do nothing to the given age.” Would be a more a more appropriate phrase. :P)
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Kiddo, it IS a joke, but the point is to show that most people take themselves too seriously. Like many others have said, keep asking questions. I’m not saying you shouldn’t believe in what you do now, just know who you are and what you stand for. I know who I am and what I believe, and that’s a precious thing. never let anyone decide who you are for you, because they’ll be wrong.
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The bible opposes homosexuality, yet god (male) created first a naked MAN. It opposes incest, yet adam and eve’s sons had kids with eve (their MOTHER) being the ONLY WOMAN amongst them, and eve was essentialy a female CLONE of adam.
It opposes canableism, but from what I hear, every other sunday, church goers eat Jesus’ BODY and drink his BLOOD… The foundations of a Demonist CULT.
God said Mary WILL have HIS child weather she wanted to or not, making him a rapist but she was fine with it and Joseph did not care that his wife had an old mans baby. The correct term for a virgin pregnancy I forget, but it is theoretically possible, if this actually happened and Mary told Joseph “God did it”, as this is the only case ever recorded, which means nothing.
It also says self mutilation is OK. “If your right eye is causting you to sin, pull it out, if your left hand is causing you to sin, cut it off and cast it into fire” or some bullshit like that.
BTW erin, i believe the correct term is: “go fuck youself” or “Fuck|You|Sideways” you catholic bigoted ass hole and hope your god loves you enough to let you live on a bloody cloud for eternity. Also, mabey you should look in the mirror and say 3 BLOODY MARY’s, not HAIL MARY’s, as the ledgend says she will kill you and then you can live with your homo-incest-cannablistic-rapist-self mutilating CULT buddies.
BTW again, it is a joke but rest assured, my analisis isn’t.
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Sandgroper Mat, you need to calm down a bit!
Erin’s exploring the limits of her theological understanding which, whatever the result, is a worthwhile pursuit. I think “go fuck yourself” is a little over the top especially as the original comment was written with a clear attempt to prevent offence being taken.
By the way, your analysis (analisis? Unpleasant sex act with an Egyptian Goddess?) is totally wrong. God didn’t have sex with Adam so he’s not a homosexual. Even if the doctrine of transubstantiation is accepted as literal (instead of symbolic as those who take communion amongst my friends agree), the transformation occurs beyond the level of our senses (whatever that means) so there’s no drinking of blood or eating human flesh being promoted. God didn’t rape Mary as (again) he didn’t have sex with her. Rape means forced sex not unwilling impregnation. God is not physically an old man in any biblical scene I’m aware of and his wife’s infidelity in Joseph’s problem to deal with in his own way. Cutting off your hand is not a literal piece of advice. It’s a metaphor. I would have thought someone with an appreciation of the FSM parody would have a better grasp of the non-literal. Also, what’s the stuff about Bloody Mary for? Do you believe that?
Anyway, chill a bit, and Erin, if you read this, I hope you continue to ask questions and form your own view of the world that makes you happy. Whether that includes God, FSM (BTW no-one really believes in FSM, it is a joke) or just the beauty of the natural world, if it comes from a genuine desire for your own truth you’ll be happy with it.
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I’m glad that you wrote a response that is grammatically correct and well punctuated, and that you admit you question your faith.
Aside from sarcastic comments on being a true Pastafarian and never denying his Holy Noodliness, truth be told—Pastafarianism literally is is the sarcastic outlook that we (atheists, agnostics, skeptics) have on the seemingly ridiculous beliefs that religions have from our point of view.
Don’t be afraid to question your faith in God, look at things from a rational point of view, without the bias of “knowing” there is a God, don’t just adhere to your religion because you fear Hell; sure Pastafarianism is somewhat offensive to believers, it is definitely a mockery, but if you look at it from our point of view, it’s just a way of showing to people who begin doubt their faith that religion really is just a compilation of superstitious beliefs and myths that many people subscribe to whether for gifts after life, or fear of eternal damnation.
To sum it up, look at belief in the Flying Spaghetti Monster as a light-hearted parody of yet another deity that nobody can prove. Look into the sarcastic side of it, you’ll see that belief in the FSM is just as viable as belief in God, Allah, whoever. They all offer the same amount of evidence, all with superstitious, scientifically impossible stories.
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13 was around the age I found His Noodly Goodness…Erin, while you’re smarter than most 13 year olds, I’m slightly surprised you couldn’t tell that FSM is a joke but most Christians on this site fail to see the irony (save for a few “enlightened ones”).
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