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The Spaghetti Constant

Published June 22nd, 2009 by Bobby Henderson

I work as a scientist in the area of coating nanotechnology, or more precisely in the development of so called nano sputtering methods. Nano sputtering is a way to position single atoms or clusters of many atoms onto a surface to form a pattern with a nanometer thickness. Often the result is rather random; it is a little bit like firing off a shotgun against a wall with the atoms as shots. My research is aiming for methods to fine-tune the sputtering in order to achieve a desired pattern and thickness instead of just a random pattern, and I did recently a quite fantastic discovery I would like to disclose at your web site. An important parameter is the Diertmann-Zeigler value (d/z value) which easily can be understood as the lateral spin energy of the atom when the Möbier coefficient is set to 1 in the equation below:

When the d/z value is continually changed from 0.24 (which is focal zero point) to 9.56 (which is van Haank’s theoretical maximum) the achieved atom pattern should according to the theory be totally random. However, according to my findings there is one single value (d/z = 1.115) which does not give a random pattern, but always exactly the same pattern (see below).

The d/z value 1.115 is equal to π/e and obviously a natural constant which I hereby would like to denominate the spaghetti constant s.

Dr. Erik Ronne



60 Responses to “The Spaghetti Constant”

  1. Max says:

    How could one doubt the FSM after witnessing such glory! Perhaps we should designate 1.115 to be a special number, or a sign of the FSM?

  2. HeavenBound says:

    Ok. So you can make his holy presence with atoms, but can you also do it with a shotgun? I am convinced that if shot with his noodlyness then you are bound to the rolling fields of endless noodly goodness.

    I’m coming!!!!

  3. ET, the Extra Terrestrial says:

    Awesome. Another veil removed.

    RAmen
    ET

  4. S. Johnson says:

    Step One: Cook Spaghetti/Noodles
    Step Two: Combine
    Step Three: Splatter like atoms on wall
    Step Four: d/x= 1.115

  5. VinZ says:

    HAHAHA! The FSM again tampering with scientific experiments! That’s what He does best. He’s so Funny (and so Great, so Delicious and so True). Thanks Erik for revealing His Noodly humour yet again.

    May you be sputtered by nanometers of Sauce in a Noodly pattern.

    RAmen!

  6. parmesanic says:

    Luis @12, the thing is that knowing and believing are two very different things. I know who buys my kid´s presents on christmas (that would be me) but I choose to believe in Santa. Get it? Enough evidence can take you from believing to knowing. Dr. Ronne, through his research, has found that a FSM-like shape is formed every time a constant of constants is used! Imagine that! No other god has been able to achieve this! Yes, it could be a coincidence but more and more evidence of His “works” is becoming available.

    Do we KNOW if His Noodliness exist? Nope. However, given the supporting evidence we BELIEVE He does. Pastafarianism is a religion in the very strict sense mostly to annoy people. In practice, we are more like a a freethinkers club. We do not like dogma and do not care for fundamentalism. That should put us far enough from being a religion.

    Maybe His Noodliness is not unintelligent as we once thought.

  7. Apprentic Frederick says:

    @ Dr. Ronne:
    The Pastafarian community owes you many kudos. Excepting, of course, Bobby’s Own Observations, your contribution has pushed the Church of His Noodliness far ahead of the only remotely comparable body of work: the scholarly but unfortunately misguided and mistaken contributions of the Jesuits. If a mere Prize were at issue, you should certainly look for a tuxedo to rent, but…this is of course up to His Noodliness…perhaps a mansion in the Vale of Vermicelli….

  8. Why the hell do you care what my name is? I'd just make something up anyways... says:

    Yeah but can you make the Virgin Mary too?

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