You know spagetti pasta was not created till the 12th century on a wooden press. are you saying the world is only 900 years old. If so then the dinosor bones are all fakes and ther primates are almost family
-david
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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Obviously spaghetti pasta was created in His image, and not the other way round… duh
Actually the “dinosaur” fossiles were put in the sedimentary layers of the earth by His Holy Noodliness the FSM to test our faith. The earth is not more than 6000 yo according to the Living Gospel of the FSM
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So just because humanity was unable to understand the design of our creator until the ‘12th century’, we didn’t exist? thats just stupid..
thats like saying we didn’t stick to the ground until Newton figured out gravity or that we didn’t get sick until we understood bacteria and viruses..
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David, Actually Chinese noodles (which is why the FSM is frequently refered to as the Noodly one) pre-date Italian pasta,and Arab traders most likely became introduced to them due to their trade routes with China. Historically, people in Italy ate pasta in the form of gnocchi-like dumplings – pasta fresca eaten as soon as it was prepared. It has now been asserted that the Muslims who populated Southern Italy (around the 12th Century) were the first to develop the innovation of working pasta from grain into thin long forms, capable of being dried out and stored for months or years prior to consumption (see Peter Robb’s Midnight in Sicily pp 94-96 for details). Possibly, Muslim traders with links to Arab trade routes to China may have been introduced to pasta or noodles that way.
At least you are a lot more intelligent than all the rest
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You are missing the point Dave. His Noodly Goodness always existed, long before pasta. Pasta was created is His image.
RAmen
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“And then the Flying Spaghetti Monster created foods in his image, and they were called Pasta. He saw that it was good. However the Midgit didn’t like the idea of eating Pasta every night of his life (I don’t know why personally, pastas are the most delicious thing on earth) and so he began complaining. The FSM grew tired of the Midgit’s constant complaining, and so he brought forth all the animals of the world and told the Midgit he could eat them. The Midgit called the cow “beef” the pig “pork” and the chicken “chicken.” The Midgit had grown bored with naming and had lost all creativity at that point.”
Pasta was created in his image. Forgive me if I got the quote wrong but I don’t have my gospel with me, when I get home I’ll give you the quote word for word.
Here’s to hoping His Noodly Appendage touches you and may His Sauce rain down upon you,
-GM
RAmen
If you have any questions about or just want to discuss the existence of the FSM, you can reach me at kanastag@comcast.net
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Yes, but Pasta was created in his perfect image. It just took him a while to get around to it, because the whole Earth thing tired him out.
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What is “spagetti pasta”? Is it the Anti-Spaghetti?
The Flying Spaghetti Monster may have given his children access to a god-like carbohydrate in the 12th century but His Noodliness has existed for much longer than time itself! In answer to your question the world has indeed existed for 900 years: hence the BS/AS colander we work with today (BS – Before Spaghetti; AS – Après Stupidity)
I think you will find that dinosors did not have bones and that a marmoset is your mother (You may also discover that your word-processor has a spell-checker).
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*sigh*
Fail.
Learn to read, kid.
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to tell you the truth i dont believe in a fsm but if i had no choice i would, i dont believe in god because i hate the hought that we must be pawns in this game of chess that we call life, and just because it says so in a book doesnt mean that i must believe it, i think that because we cant think of anything higher than god i must mean that there is one. I am 15 years old and i have come to facts in that i will enevitably die but that might be anouther reason why you believe in god, you may believe in him because you are scared of death and hope that we can continue our lives in heaven or hell, you yourself then must not be a christian because you are stateing scientifical evidence about dinosaur bones so why do you care?
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Everything was created last tuesday, you only think you’ve been around longer than that.
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Where to start!? This certainly has the readability and grammar of a Christian’s hate mail, but something just isn’t right. Is this a first — hate mail from an atheist who doesn’t get the purpose of tehe FSM?
Nah, more like someone who’s half-grasped the ridiculousness and inaccuracy of the bible but still can’t go the whole hog and drop their belief.
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By that same logic of Western fleshly physical manifestation, shouldn’t Christians be claiming the world is only 2000 years old? Indeed, shouldn’t david take his suspicions of historical fakery to the full extreme by claiming nothing existed before his own mortal form walked this Earth?
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Did you know that modern humans were not around until about 500 thousand years ago (you can find homo-erectus footprints dating back to a few million years ago but perhap’s that’s not quite “modern”). That means that whatever god you represent wasn’t made up until after the dinosaurs were gone. So you tell me, are all the dinosaur bones fake, or did god impregnate a raptor to spread truth to the reptiles?
Also, humans are primates. Check that out, knowledge is power ya know.
- Bagelsauce
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… oh dear god.
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Yargh!
I’ll just assume you’re a bible creationist.
5,000 to 900 is a much smaller difference than 500,000,000 to 5,000. Since you already took the liberty of reducing the actual age of the earth by 5 orders of magnitude, what’s another 0.74? :)
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Ooh! Well, look at Mr. Smarty-pants!
Let me ask you something, David. Were you there, at the creation of spaghetti? Hm? No? So how do you know that He didn’t manipulate history with his Noodly Appendage to make it look like it was invented 900 years ago instead of at the dawn of time? Hmmmmm?
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Just because pasta wasn’t discovered on Earth until the 12th century does not mean it didn’t exist in the heavens.
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spagetti <— wrong (spaghetti)
till <— wouldn’t it be “until”
are you saying the world is only 900 years old <— no capitilization and shouldnt there be a question mark at the end of that sentence?
dinosor <— dinosaur.
ther <—-….. is that supposed to be their? or the…
and ther primates are almost family <—- that makes no sense… i think i get the gist of what you’re trying to say but I am probably wrong because your spelling and grammar skills are lacking.
And they say us pastafarians are uneducated.
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Of course, we can’t tell how old the world is, because as our gospel clearly states, the FSM changes scientific results with his Noodly Appendages to make the world look older than it really is. But you’re putting the cart before the horse, David. We’re not claiming that humans created the FSM. We’re claiming the FSM simply exists, much like Xtians claim that their Big Sky Daddy simply exists. Earthly pasta is, I dunno, maybe a manifestation borne of some Jungian archetype buried deep in the human psyche, created to honor the FSM on some deep, mystical level that we didn’t even know about at the time. Or, maybe it just tastes really good. Who can say?
It’s nice to see someone trying to use reductio ad absurdum to show us the error of our ways, though, even when they flub it up pretty thoroughly.
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It wasn’t until the 12th century that humans learnt to imitate their creator by making pasta. Pasta did already exist since creation however. What else do you think pirates ate?
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Argg… and your point would be??? Methinks ye should get thee a copy of the good book and at least flip through it a wee bit in the book store even if ye don’t wish to buy it. You would then understand just how little sense your arrrgument be makin’.
RAmen
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You know the Bible was not created till a few thousand years ago? Are you saying the world is only a few thousand years old? Of course the bones are all fake. If so, then the “dinosor” bones are all fake (at least that’s what we believe).
The last part of the sentence I couldn’t read.
RAmen, your friendly neighborhood pirate.
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Science says that the earth is billions of years old. I believe the Church of the FSM says about 4000 years. The FSM can change scientific results to suit His purposes, so I’ll stick with His Truth. Remember, that His ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts higher than our thoughts.
rAmen
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But what about Hong LiuFeng and his Canelloni army?
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David
Dinosaur bones have been placed by our noodly master to test our faith. You do know that nothing existed before pasta existed, don’t you? I think you have been fooled into believing pasta was invented by man. I suggest you reread the gospel of the FSM.
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David, you are konfused. Duzn’t yer scool teach Creationism? Dinosors ate spagetti and coconuts wich maid ther bones good and strong so they wud last a long tim. So obveusly spagetti has bin arond mor than 900 years, maybe 6000 years. Dinosors primates (or famly jewls as we call them) did not last as long as ther bones. I hope this enlitens you about this subject.
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Again an idiot who didn’t read the letter…
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*sigh*…please see paragraph 4 of the Open Letter: http://www.venganza.org/about/open-letter/
The almighty FSM planted those dinosaur bones there to test our faith (much like the Christian followers believe their god did the same thing 2000 years ago).
Yarr!
-moby
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Dear David, you clearly didnt read the Open Letter. Please get informed before posting next time.
And, read #2 to get ub3r p0wned.
May the Noodly Appendage guide you to the truth.
RAmen.
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Okay, here’s the real quote. I really failed on what I could remember…
“That midget, however, was goddamn noisy. The FSM couldn’t deal with all the complaining down on earth, so the Lord FSM commanded the midget, saying, “Here’s an idea . . . why don’t you collect the semolina, rice, and what-have-you, and make pasta in my image. That’s what it’s there for. And Fill your mouth with it and be quiet and peaceful. But be careful with the…”
The quote goes on about the olive tree and has really nothing to do with what I was saying.
here’s to hoping His Noodly Appendage touches you and may His Sauce rain down upon you,
-GM
RAmen
If you have any questions about or just want to discuss the existence of the FSM, you can reach me at kanastag@comcast.net
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Wait! Wait! I want to know more about the Canelloni army. Did they wear Cannelloni as armor?
I can hear the Hymn now:
Put on thy shield of Pasta,
Bathe thyself in Sauce.
His garlic cloves are Holy.
You will not suffer loss.
From victory unto victory
He fills the pasta bowl
With Parmesan and Meatballs.
He satisfies thy soul.
Feel free anyone, to add verses. Maybe we need a hymnal.
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Oh come on people.
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I love how morons get eviscerated on this site. Well done, mateys!
love,
sarah
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not created till the 12th century on a wooden press? but when time?
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you are fucking retarded if you think anyone is going to take this serious you need to put your dick where your mouth is and stfu!!!!!!!!!!!!
this is not a religion this is some retarded out castst fucked up little joke….!!!!!!!!!!! i everyone who belives in the faggot ass FSM dies as they read this! ita all yall hippy retarded butt pirats you can all fucking die!!!!!!!if i ever meet someone who is involved with this gay ass society i will fucking cut your dick off!!!!!this is not fucking funny so stop fucking doind this shit or i will fucking find you you fucking dick sucker
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You know, for a piece of “hate mail” this particular message isn’t really bringing the hate for me. It’s almost polite actually, and if nothing else it’s pretty frank rather than hateful. Yes friends, this letter reeks of lukewarm hate. At best this is a letter expressing how proud somebody is of themselves in finding a logical flaw in an internet religious group. It doesn’t really matter that he did not actually find a flaw; he thinks he has, and that’s all that matters. He’s an individual, unique, brilliant, and special; just like everyone else. And he has no problem letting us know this.
I think we, the pastafarians, should band together and require more hate from our hate mail. It should deserve the name. There should be ranting, threats, declarations of self-righteousness, swearing, run on sentences, and religious fervor. This letter really has none of that. I ask you non-believers; add more honest hate to your hate mail. Hate openly and without reservation. Heck, even veil you hate with declarations of pity or sadness, but hate us none the less; you owe us that much.
In love and noodles,
Pastafarian Taco
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Methinks I’ve heard tell of pasta being brought to Italy by Marco Polo. It could be so or it could be the Arab traders that brought the great noodly bounty to the great unwashed of Europe. I have faith that it were the pyrates that brought the pasta to the rest of the world. And we all know that faith is the source of truth.
So posts the DreddPyrateRoberts!! Yarrrrrgh! and a hearty rAmen!
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Pasta was created by Humans in His image.
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I double-dog dare you to _prove_ that I existed before a few seconds ago. As a matter of fact – I urge you to try and prove that I exist right now. Can’t be done – requires faith. Faith as small as a tiny pirate will move large amounts of grog.
PC
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David (may I capitalize your name?),
You refer to fundamentalist Pastafarians when you refer to the wooden press. The first of our kind survived on pasta from heaven about 60,000 BB (Before Bobby). This was way after the dinosaurs if you don’t include the occasional mechanical T. Rex trotted out by prehistoric Hollywood for nonmovies.
Modern worshippers use high tech Italian pasta makers run while in pirate regalia.
My uncle, Simba the Chimp, takes personal offense at being called “almost” family by the way.
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Dylan, “till” is correct. The word predates the word “until”, so both are acceptable.
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Dave,
Oh please. You’re just jealous that He hasn’t touched you with His Noodly Appendage. Accept that touch, Dave. It’s good for you and it’s marvelous.
Meisha
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It appears we have angered Austin (#35)! Whatever will we do? He does seem rather attached to dicks though… So, he is another one of those trolls who was raised with just enough Christianity to be really pissed off at us and deny his homosexual tendencies, and to prophesy (I didn’t die though, so your career as a prophet may not work out so well… don’t quit your day job), but not Christian enough to threaten us will hellfire and revel in our impending eternal torture.
Yes yes, we have heard all of this before. I have no intention of stopping “this shit” (as you so eloquently put it). I, however, don’t have a dick to cut off, so we are definitely going to run into some issues. Coming to find me now? I am questioning how. You are not even able to form a complete sentence, nor are you intelligent enough to use spell check. Could you possibly have the mental facilities to carry out that threat? I HIGHLY doubt it (I also highly doubt you will ever get out of high school). Typical of a Christian. Makes huge threats that they cannot possibly deliver.
You, however, did ALMOST pass the troll hate mail test. Check on horrible grammar, spelling, lots of homophobic retoric, lots of fucks and shits, threats on our lives. You didn’t, however, quote buybull verses or tell us how much you are going to enjoy thinking about us in hell (or something of that nature). Overall I give you a 6. Better luck next time.
RAmen,
D&WC
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Hey Austin, why so angry? Are we messing with your tiny little mind? Maybe you should stay away from sites like this that may make you think. We wouldn’t want your brain to explode. Might get some on us. By the way, have you worn the print off of that exclamation point key yet?
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@austin
Bring it on, you ignorant little twerp. I’ll let you take the first swing. Make it a good one, because it will be the only one you get. BTW, you might want to take a course in basic English. For someone with your obvious lack of education to be calling anyone retarded is really beyond the pale.
I’m not going to stop doing anything. You gonna stop me?
I didn’t think so. Pussy. Shut up and go home and tell your mother she wants you.
RAmen
ET
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#35 – austin
“i ever meet someone who is involved with this gay ass society i will fucking cut your dick off!!!!!”
~~~
Awww austin, the FSM loves you too. He really does!
All your need to do is cease your incessant wanking and let His Glorious Noodly Appendage come unto you.
Now clean all that sticky off your keyboard, take a deep breath and fix yourself a big bowl of pasta.
RAmen
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Hey Austin,
you don’t have a penis do you? we can tell you know. It’s kind of obvious. Don’t worry me old mucker, there’s gotta be a bloke out there who can give you some.
As for the original post: related to apes? Well I’ll be a monkey’s uncle!
M
PS Austin, its OK, really, its OK. BTW every pastafarian could kick your saggy ass.
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@oldewench
Simply Bravissimo!
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Onward Pasta Pirates
Marching off to sup
Beer ‘canos and strippers
Await when we go “up.”
At the sign of triumph
Xtian forces flee
On then Pasta Pirates
On to Victory!
Onward then ye people
Join our happy throng
Blend with yours our voices
In our victory song
Glory, laud, and honor
The Flying Pasta King
This through countless ages
Midgets and strippers sing!
Onward Pasta Pirates
Marching off to sup
Beer ‘canos and strippers
Await when we go “up.”
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before you start sending in hate mail, please read what the website is about. yes, THE WHOLE POINT of this site is to create a FAKE RELIGION in which no one truly believes. personally, i am not sure how i feel about religion, but i believe that when we try to teach things in a science class for which there is no scientific backing, people are entitled to be frustrated. this website is an outlet for that frustration by showing trying to show a hugely ridiculous exaggeration of what teaching bible in a non-religious school’s science class is like. so i’m not going to go ape on you, but please try to understand what you’re hating on before you do it publicly.
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Hasen’t this stupid spaghetti religion joke gone on long enough? It’s not true or funny. It’s just annoying. I hope you ”pastafarians” aren’t actually stupid enough to believe this crap…
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Wow,
I’m aware of human stupidity but this is ridiculous. People should learn to put down the Bible and stop quoting it for everything. Remember that Shakespeare quote “There are more things in this heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamed of in your philosophy”.
And people… LEARN TO SPELL for pete’s sake. And learn grammar as well.
All praise FSM!
James
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Dear Darian it is both true and funny,but sadly,you are not.
May the Sauce be with you.
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@51
Hasn’t this stupid jeezus religion joke gone on long enough? It’s not true or funny. It’s just annoying. I hope you “jeezus freaks” aren’t actually stupid enough to believe this crap…
RAmen!
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I’m impressed. We’ve gotten 2 trolls already within our own hate mail replies. It’s too bad those weren’t individual hate mails, because we seem to be running low on those over the past few days.
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NOW you’re getting it, David!
Had you taken the time to find out what this site is all about, you’d find it’s a satire on
Intelligent Design. Then research the Creationist Museum in Kentucky, where there are
displays of children playing with dinosaurs, since the earth is less than 10,000 years old.
Maybe then you’ll find out where Bobby and the Pastafarians are coming from.
Naaah! Sounds like too much work to use your brain, doesn’t it? Just keep believing
what the man in the pulpit tells you.
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Dear Austin @35,
I am in tears. Thanks for the blessings. You are priceless!
Dear Darion @51,
As long as there are stupid trolls like you out there, our religion “hasn’t gone on long
enough”. To paraphrase Prophet Bobby, our religion is completely legit. Anything that sound like a joke is a coincidence.
And it’s a pleasure to know we getting under your skin.
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“You know spagetti pasta was not created till the 12th century”
-
That’s where you’re wrong my friend. The Aurignacian cave paintings (which date back 32,000 years) show cave men spinning spaghetti on primitive pasta looms.
-
Dinosaurs (esp. Pastasaurus) and primates also like spaghetti.
-
RAmen
-
LJS.
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@#35
I don’t know what you said, but I think it has something to do with your penis fetish. Made me laugh. A lot. I’ve never heard anyone not grasp the english language so well. You just murdered someone, her name is Grammar.
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#51
Don’t let the door hit you on your way out.
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I disagree with EVERYTHING already said. I actually believe in the flying cum spurt. So, I suppose it is similar to FSM in the way that it tastes rather good. I joke, that would get you into hell. Well, FUCK YOU TAKING THIS SO SERIOUSLY!
Lighten up. =]
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“Hasn’t these stupids human like gods religions joke gone on long enough? It’s not true or funny. It’s just annoying. I hope you aren’t actually stupid enough to believe this crap…”
Wahooo only one word difference and the world seems suddenly so clever !!!
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spaghetti was imported to italy in the 12th century… before that, there were chinese noodles, which is why devout pastafarians say “Ramen”…
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@#35 Austin & @#51 Darion
You’re both funny in ways that you’ll never understand.
RAmen.
LJS.
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All I can say is that everyone on this site is a moronic idiot, and that you will all burn in Hell if you don’t turn to the One True God— God — before you die.
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ugh not another noob we have been through this before, pasta was made in HIS image, anyone who read the gospel would know that.
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#65, all I can say is that you are a moronic idiot and you will be stuck with stale beer and diseased strippers if you don’t turn to the one true FSM before you die.
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Well you guys think it is what, 6000? dinos were supposedly around long before 6000 years ago.
And we did not create FSM, he created us. The birth of spaghetti pasta was simply a tribute to his noodlyness.
Also, post # 65, thats mean, we aren’t damning you, so stop damning us.
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Dear Dave (#35),
Bring it.
reverend_james@rocketmail.com
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@65
Everyone on this site is a moronic idiot, you say? Then does that mean that moronic idiots are more than capable of making their way through University? Does that mean that moronic idiots have good grammar and are more than capable of destroying any argument made by the religious people that troll this site? And more importantly, if those of us that are here and making strong arguments with good grammar are moronic idiots, then what does that make you?
-So_So_Man
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Hey, Austin (#35), Darion (#51) and I won’t give you my name (#65)? Can you please not associate yourself with Me, please? I’ve got enough problems keeping things running without Gabriel or Jude Thaddius coming up to Me and saying “Do you know what these nitwits are doing now?”
P.S. Could you commit suicide? Give Lucifer some headaches for once. I swear, he gets all the best people…
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David,
yes pasta is only 900 years old.
however, the FSM is older. the FSM only decided 900 years ago to teach the way of pasta making, as it was the begining of the Spagetti season. These seosons are believed to be extremely long.
Another interesting point, David, is that meat no longer grows naturally in the form of balls anymore, this was also changed 900 years ago, as the FSM wanted his spagetti to now be plentiful, rather than his balls. Much like yourself David, lacking balls. It is believed that during the Spagetti season that balls can be found, but during the ball season, no pasta-based food is present.
I hope this helps with your distasteful views.
your in faith and in sauce,
Pasta J.O’Brien
RAmen.
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lol i saw something like this on south park
i think this is funny. Even though i am christian so…….lol this is really stupid! My site actually has a meaning to it and a good cause
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You, all the unbelievers!! You dont know how it feels when our Lady the Spaghetti Monster touch you with her Holy tallarinesque apendages!!! I am praying She for yours!! If the Pasta was not cooked before 12 century it was because She want us to mature as specie. And maybe 12 century is when the Spaghetti was first-time cooked for all the world, but this not mean there isnt any Spaghetti cooked before. Only there is not proof yet.
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This thread is infected. Burn it
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@73 What is your site? Howtogetitwrong.com? howtofailbynotreading.com? please let me know i need a good laugh.
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Cori (#73),
This website has a great cause! That would fighting against taking mythology, dressing it up using some big words, calling it science, and then teaching it in public schools. As a science teacher, I think this is an excellent cause. Children should be taught facts and how to reason. They should be taught to ask questions and think for themselves. They should not just accept and regurgitate their elders’ beliefs. There is also the very small matter of the separation of church and state. But what is a little law when you have followers to indoctrinate (after all, who else is going to pay the bills)?
What does your site do? Praise Jeebus? Yeah… great cause there. Promoting ignorance. Good job. Whenever you find that proof that he ever existed, let me know (and the buybull doesn’t count, so go find something else).
In Peace and Sauciness,
D&WC
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Dear #65 – I won’t give you my name
“All I can say is that everyone on this site is a moronic idiot”
If that’s all you can say, you have quite some vocal disability to talk about. Oh wait, you can’t. I’m truely sorry for you.
I also couldn’t help notice that by just being on this site for even the briefest moment you’ve entered the collection of people called “everyone on this site” and therefor, by your own definition of “everyone on this site”, you are a moronic idiot. I’m terribly sorry.
As a moronic idiot, I can nevertheless understand that you probably won’t take my word for it, since I am a moronic idiot. I’m, again, sorry for you.
I think there have been lots of moronic idiots on this site that you wouldn’t recognize as moronic idiots who once visited this side, including most probably a lot of your friends and relatives you told about this site full of moronic idiots. I pity the poor moronic idiots you turned them into.
This is my moronic idiot way of saying: it takes one to spot one. I’m not sorry at all.
Olax (I would give you my real name, but I couldn’t remember it, while burning in Hell – as a moronic idiot)
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Hey #35, I’m pretty sure as a good Christian you’re supposed to ‘turn the other cheek’ and forgive us, unless I missed that part in the Bible where Jesus exhorts all his followers to cut off other people’s dicks for peacefully holding an opposing viewpoint.
Also, it’s very funny and quite possibly true, we’re not about to stop, and with 10 million of us (including women, which makes it all a bit complicated anyway) living all over the world it’s gonna take you a while – you’re going to be a pretty busy boy castrating even just all of us males.
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#58 “Dinosaurs (esp. Pastasaurus) and primates also like spaghetti.” Did the pastasaurus and the humans cohabitate 32000 years ago? If so, then this news flies in the face of the dinosaurs and humans cohabitating 6000 years ago theory. The Pentacostals are going to go nuts!
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his nodliness willed it so spaghetti was created when it suited him… haha! how do so many people not get that this is a joke to prove that religion is bul****? Anyone who does believe in some spaghetti monster is only proving how ridiculous religion is, and these idiots who send ridiculous hate mail only prove it further by ignoring basic christian/jewish/islam/etc philosophies. didn’t god say to “turn your ass away” or something like that when you’re mocked? i’m all for the values taught in major religion, but not if it turns people into squabbling idiots who want some invisible being to do everything for them.
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What the deuce is this nonsense? I believe what you MEANT to say is this:
“You know spag(h)etti pasta was not created till the 12th century on a wooden press(?) are you saying the world is only 900 years old(?) If so(,) then the dinos(au)r bones are all fakes and (the) primates are almost family.
-(D)avid”
If you’re trying to get a point across, try to find a clue and a sense of humor first. You seem to be struggling with your writing a wee bit. I mean, I’m sixteen years old and my post makes a lot more sense than yours. In closing, I thank you for at least taking into consideration that we have no inclination to hear you blather on in a long, pointless post positively riddled with grammatical and spelling errors. In short: thank you for the brevity of your post. (Please feel free to consult a dictionary if you find yourself having trouble with any of these words).
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81, stop insulting my belief in the FSM. :P
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The divine form of spaghetti pasta was not realised by MAN until the 12th century, just as in your bible, it took a few days for God to create humans and quite a while before a few schizophrenics decided to write down what the voices in their head told them and made the Buybull
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NO you don’t understand! Spaghetti was made as tribute to honor and respect THE FSM. I f it wasn’t fsor the FSM spaghetti and pasta wouldn’t of been made and a lot of people would struggle for carbohydrates!
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No, spaghetti comes from the spaghetti tree:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SyUvNnmFtgI
DUH!
And if you believe that and this religion are real, you are too big of a twit to futher contemplate.
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David, “are you saying the world is only 900 years old. If so then the dinosor bones are all fakes.”
I hope you realize that christians actually believe that dinosaur bones are fake, placed here by the devil to confuse us. And yes they believe they world is Approx. 5000 yrs old course.
Of course the christians are probably just making satirical spin on FSM’s true original human confusion plot about the aging of the earth.
RAmen.
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I really don’t understand the whole argument of Pasta Making? When human womenkind became aware of their spirits they tried many ways to express themselves. First bread, then rice, and finally pasta! Suddenly it all made sense.
The point is: The Flying Spaghetti Monster was only called spaghetti once the spaghetti were used in the kitchen! Before it was just the Flying Nameless Monster. And that word really didn’t stuck.
Rudi
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Pasta wasn’t created… it was discovered.
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First of all, ‘dinosor’ bones were created by his noodleyness, the FSM. Secondly, it is logical that non-believers THINK that pasta was invented in 12th century, because the FSM is able to alter history with his meat balls. Duh!
Also, The FSM invented the wooden press.
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Is Marco Polo, who carried noodlyness from the Orient back to Euorpe, considered a major saint? Does one pray to him to intercede with the FSM?
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Why would anybody believe in a flying spaghetti monster? I think it is a great thing that people have a good enough sense of humor to create an entirely fake religion. Of course nobody actually believes in the Flying spaghetti monster, it’s all just a joke. The purpose of religion is simply to fill the part of your brain that is left empty, wondering how the universe came into being, there is no actual point to it. The life lessons are good, but if you truly believe that a man in the sky that nobody can see will send you to a place of fire and suffering if your bad because it will save your soul, your about as stupid as a log. Similar to the other religions (you know, the ones that are “right” and true”) pointless, but those who enjoy the life of being part of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti monster are just as smart and most likely smarter than those who oppress them. As the point to the FSM is to know that it is not true and to have the knowledge that… no, there is no such thing as a true religion, they were all created by men and women just like you and me and none of them hold any truth, aside from the lessons they teach. In truth, the point of all religion is to support a set of ideals, not to believe in this god or that monster or that alien lord, but to teach you the meaning of being a good person. So no, the earth is not 900 years old, but guess what? If you are a Mormon, your religion argues against the possible existence of dinosaurs, while giving absolutely no explanation. In reality, you could make fun of any religion for loopholes between their religion, science and history, because they will always have them. So don’t tell me to go to hell or that you hope god smites me because what you should be doing is, rather than telling me I’m wrong, tell me that you hope I have a good life because in actuality, that is all your trying to do as well. Just calm down, besides, do you actually think that simply insulting somebody is going to sway their beliefs? Because all your doing is making an ass of yourself.
-Alexander
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wait… I understand now. Ever wonder what meat balls are made of? Dinosaurs…which means that the bones are the remenants of the Flying Spagetti Monsters creation which he made just to create meatballs. If that is true… what came first the Flying Spagetti Monster the Dinosaur or the meatball? My head hurts…
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Please don’t be fooled. Be aware that scripture is revealed by men (or whatever) as the inspired word of the unquestionable Creator. The loving nature of our enabler, our redeemer, our, dare I say it, most affectionate “creature”, (Did I go too far?) fulfills our need for history, lineage, or other doubts that may surface in our minds.
I propose a theory. This explains the deep seated longing I have for pasta and other carbohydrates. It is my postulation that there is an anti FSM, yes, even the “BIZZARO” FSM.
Am I backslidden or does anyone have any cleansing thoughts that might help me?
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CONSPIRACY THEORIES *gasps in horror*
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In 2005 archeologist found noodles fossil in China; aged of more than 5000 years.
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The creation of pasta during the 12th century was part of a cover-up to save the pirates, of course.
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History-Spouting Hate-Mailers… I DARE you to read this.
All you hate-mailers who try to debunk our beliefs by quoting the date of spaghetti’s invention, (usually somewhere between the 9th and 17th century, depending on the hate-mailer’s research), this message is for you.
You people are missing the point! … WHICH IS:
God has probably been enjoying spaghetti and meatballs for EONS!
The fact that we humans didn’t think of it until relatively recently means absolutely nothing.
Perhaps it was his love of this dish, In The Beginning, that inspired him to fashion his own physical vessel after it’s image. Who knows?
That’s one more argument against the FSM that’s been flayed alive.
May his chin-staining goodness be yours, DJD
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Thou who first formed the Spagetti was a Prophet. He was touched by the divine Noodly Appendage.
RAmen
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Funny how you talk shit when you can’t even spell Dinosaur, retard.
This shows how retarded christians and catholics really are.
Half of the people who send hate mail can’t even spell, or use proper, or at LEAST decent grammar.
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I wonder if all these 12century pasta inventors realize that the Chinese had been eating a noodle type dish for over 3000 years before the birth of Jesus.
Which makes Pastafarianism a more ancient sect of worship than Christianity.
Ramen
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