Good fun, at what cost?

Published April 4th, 2009 by Bobby Henderson

What a great way to invest your time and I really appreciate your sense of humor. Sadly, there is a human emotion, or response called “regret.” For example, a drunk driver wakes up in a jail cell with no memory of the night before. He is walked over in hand cuffs to a “service window” and told he is being booked or vehicular man slaughter. It turns out he ran a red light, struck a SUV with a family of 5, killing 2 children under the age of 5.

The joy you receive running this web site is probably pretty big. I’m sure you love the ignorant hate mail you receive or the attention from other joy seeking worldly people.

My question to you is, do you consider yourself a good person? On the day of judgment when you’re standing in front of a Holy and righteous God, how will you fare? What kind of remorse do you think you, and others you may be leading away from God will feel when they are turn away from the gates of Heaven and cast in to the pits of Hell for not repenting for the Sin we are all guilty for? You have you ever lied, stolen or committed adultery within your heart?

I don’t honestly believe that you’re going to reply with some miracle response that says “yes, you’re right I will repent and follow Jesus.” Do yourself a favor. Do some research and really consider what you’re basing the fate and existence of your eternal soul on. If you decide to follow your current path, good luck friend. If you find yourself with even the slightest doubt of the certainty of your eternal soul then I suggest you pick up your Bible, read it and do what it says.

God Bless,

Nick



295 Responses to “Good fun, at what cost?”

  1. theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

    “pick up your Bible, read it and do what it says”
    So last Sunday I walked down to the drug store and killed all the employees for working on the Sabbath. Now the law is looking for me. Thanks a lot for THAT suggestion!

    • puppygoogoo says:

      I havent laughed like that in a long time.

      Cheers

      Puppygoogoo

      • TheFewTheProudTheMarinara says:

        And the real bitch is that I found out when that passage was written the Sabbath was on Saturday! Maybe the Savior* made a permanent tee-time for Saturday mornings.

        * What the hell is he saving us FROM? His anger?

    • Keith says:

      I will always remember what my former superviser told me about when he lived in the country. The local Lutheran preacher was seen driving a tractor on a Sunday and the fellow who saw him asked him what a man of god was doing breaking the laws of the sabbath. His reply was
      “Because I’m a bloody farmer and what I couldn’t get done yesterday has to be done today.” As far as I know he did not die from being struck by lightning.

  2. Alphy says:

    “I suggest you pick up your Bible, read it and do what it says.”

    OK, John,
    First of all I need to ask does my Bible have to be a King James Version? You know, the only true Bible according to fundamentalist protestants. Or; can I read my New American Roman Catholic Bible? Or; do I even need a fundamentalist bigot to approve what cannon of scripture I read? Do I have to take every passage literally like fundies do or can I rely on the 2000 year old tradition of interpreting scripture by the teaching authority of the Church established by Christ, the church who’s authority you fundamentalists reject?

    I took your advice. I grabbed my bible and asked ask Jesus to guide me to the right message before I opened it so I would know what to do in times of trouble. Then I opened it and read the message God put right before my eyes. It said-

    “Judas went out and killed himself. Go thou and do likewise. What thou must do do quickly.”

    So, now that I have read my bible, I will do as it says. Thank you so much John for your great advice. My, what a keen analytical mind you have there! Must come from all that ‘”research”‘ that you do.

    You hypocrite-
    “My question to you is, do you consider yourself a good person? On the day of judgment when you’re standing in front of a Holy and righteous God, how will you fare? What kind of remorse do you think you, and others you may be leading away from God will feel when they are turn away from the gates of Heaven and cast in to the pits of Hell for not repenting for the Sin we are all guilty for? You have you ever lied, stolen or committed adultery within your heart?”

    Who in hell are you to put your ass in the Judgement seat? Isn’t Christ to be the sole Judge? “As you do to others, so shall it be done unto you”.

    Always digging around like other fundies to see if you can find any sin in someone else. Like you are so damn pure! I bet you are only to happy to point out other’s erroring ways so you can lead them to righteousness. Right? Well, I am reading my bible again and it says that “your righteousness is as filthy rages” “Take the log out of your own eye before you take the mote out of your brothers”.

    • Keith says:

      I opened my edition (Cambridge Pictorial 1950 something) and read “And these be the names of the sons of Gershom; Libni and Shimei.” Well, if I ever come across Gershom I’ll be certain to remind him who his sons are.

      • Rasputin says:

        Ha Ha Ha ! Reading the wit in this blog is better than watching the funniest movie ever made. Well done fellas.

  3. Shayne Schecht says:

    This is a blanket response to most of the hate mail I have read on the site so far. The morons who write and slam you really have no sense of humour, or the brains to use proper English grammar and punctuation, let alone spelling and using text speak because of the lack of intelligence it takes to spell the words YOU … TO … TOO … and BE, and so many others, let alone realise that this religion was done in a humourous fashion to mock the religious nutbags out there.
    This is great fun work Bobby … please keep it up.

    Firstly …
    Sense of humour motherfuckers … Get one.

    As for what I will do on judgement day … There is no god … it isn’t what I believe … it’s what I know, but on that day if I am wrong, I will spit blood in its face with venom and hatred for abandoning its children it supposedly loves.

    Go choke on a communion wafer … and get a dictionary. Spell check motherfucker … Learn it, use it!!!

    Pray for me I will prey on you. I live to ridicule and mock your god and make fun of christians and muslims (I do not capitalise those words as they do not deserve the respect of a proper noun) and most other religions as well. Jesus, if he existed at all, was a delusional cunt and the loudmouth got what he deserved.

    Please print this where it can be seen … and you are more than welcome to post my name and email address … let them come for me … I am not afraid and I have a nasty surprise for all of the idiots that want to take me on for my blatant disrespect of their religions, and for my blatant blasphemy.

    All the best Bobby and long live the FSM!!

    • The Reverend Toni Rigatoni says:

      If anybody is reading the above post having come to this site for the first time, please be aware that he does NOT represent the majority of Pastafarians. Unprovoked attacks are NOT the order of the day here. Shayne, I would ask you to think about how you are using our church, the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is NOT a platform for hatred and threats and I, and many other regulars here would appreciate it if you moderated the tone of your posts. You lessen the effectiveness of our arguments with your venom and hatred, not to mention your foul language. I appreciate that you may feel very strongly about your disbelief but you do yourself and all the moderate and intelligent regulars at our Church no favours at all with posts like yours. Our posts are, without fail, defensive responses to attacks upon us; attacks like yours reduce our credibility to zero and if we are to continue being effective in our goals we must remain above such childish and immature rants.

      You post reveals you as a dogmatic fundamentalist hater, just like many of those who attack us; and you bring us down to their level, a situation that the majority here strive constantly to avoid. Instead of spewing hatred and threats, why not try explaining WHY you feel like you do, that will hopefully have a far greater effect on those you are trying to reach than just putting their backs up for the sake of it. Defend your position by all means, in fact we would encourage you, and anybody else to do so, but do it with your brain not your heart.

      May the Sauce be with you.

      The Reverend.

    • Rasputin says:

      Please be aware that this is not an athiestic web site. If you are an athiest, please go elsewhere. This site is dedicated to the worship of the One True God, the Flying Spaghetti Monster. So please don’t spout stuff which is athiestic. I don’t care if you say Jebus doesn’t exist, and reasoned discussion is acceptable, but I don’t want people to think that this is a site for athiests who just pretend they believe in a Flying Spaghetti Monster but don’t really.

      • DickVanstone says:

        I have to admit, my intuition says to delete this bookmark now. It won’t be much of an adjustment to my everyday life. I’ll just have to continue being an anarchist agnostic atheist elsewhere.

        • DickVanstone says:

          To clarify I don’t support Shayne’s views. That is not the reason for my previous comment.

          Also I should wait for someone else to comment for I don’t know if Rasputin talks on behalf of venganza.org. I await with bated breath. ;)

      • DickVanstone says:

        Also, there are absolutely clergy within the Christian Church who are secretly atheist in every denomination, why do you think Pastafarians would be exempt from human nature?

  4. Momyr Andersson says:

    Thing is though…. Im sorry to say but chances are there is no heaven and thus you wont be judged for being a ”Heretic”.

  5. Johnny Soers says:

    Another hard core Christian trying to impose his religion on everyone. I bet he’d say the same thing to a hindu or a buddhist, and i bet he thinks all muslims are terrorists, and all Jews heathens.

  6. Johnny Soers says:

    And he’s never lied?

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