It may be a free country but this is fucking retarded! Blow me tard! Were you fucking bored when you made this shit? Drunk maybe? Plese go kill yourself! PLEEAAASEE! FOR GOD SAKE(FUCK THE MONSTER)eat shit dude! The only cool thing is the pirate thing.
F
U
C
K
y
o
u
B
I
T
C
H
!
It is hard to descibe my hate to your kind of people! FSM is a hobby and not realigion! I really hope you really suffer a slow and painful death! Thanks dude! Suck one
-Christy
It may be a free country…
Published by Bobby Henderson April 14th, 2009 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 205 Comments
205 Responses to “It may be a free country…”
i definitely prefer pirates over ninjas
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Ahhh, a Christian at heart.
I love you too, Christy.
(And is that a girl name? Because… you want to be blown, and I may be new to the concept, but that requires a penis, right?)
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“fuck the monster! fuck him in the balls! fuck him in the sauce so sweet. fuck his noodle. fuck that monster with a midget. fuck that monster on a mountain. fuck that monster with a pirate. make him suffer for our sins. fuck that fucker. fuck the monster. ohhhhhh”
Why, Chuck, I didn’t know you felt so close to His Noodliness. :D
~I really should read the comments before I post about the hate mail.
Then I’d be able to avoid double posts. ^^;;
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Realigion? She has to be 12. Somebody shoot her parents.
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I’m constantly surprised that advocates of a religion whos god has told them to love others without exception seem so inept at actually exercising that love.
I mean seriously, a GOD told you to love everyone. Not your favorite actor, not your mother, not the magazine you read yesterday, but your GOD.
I mean if you can’t get the very fundiments of your religion correct, how are we supposed to take you seriously? It’s sad that “hobby” seems to be getting it more correct than those fighting against it.
In Love and Pasta,
Pastafarian Taco
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“realigion” may have been her attempt on a play on words… then again, she is a hate-mongering barely literate “Christian”. Subtlety of that nature seems to always escape her kind.
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Wow. I wonder if Christy’s parent’s are aware of what she’s posting on the web. Or, for that matter, the sites that she is visiting. If it threatened her world view so much that she was that disturbed, well, how about a good shrink?
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You know Christy, The things that you have said about this guy are of the same value and merit, if not worse. You tell him to eat shit and die. Why is it that you tell him that? Is it because you believe in God and you think that FSM is a bunch of bologna? Well. Christy, I agree that this FSM nonsense is just that; nonsense! HOWEVER, if your excuse for saying all of those things is because you believe in God and Creation and the holiness of the Bible, as I do, then you probably need to re-evaluate your relationship with God!
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Christy, they have the right to believe whatever they want, just not the brains to know that something that someone drew on a piece of paper in 2005 is not what made the world. Ill tell you what, I will draw a stick figure TOMORROW and write up some by-laws and some mumbo jumbo about this stick figure who is going to be named JOE. Then I will make JOE bigger and better than this FSM and will tell JOE to go over to FSM’s house and eat him. If these people believe that something that was made after their birth created the world generations before they were concieved, then they MUST legitimize my claim that JOE was there before FSM BECAUSE I will have a picture of him making FSM who is just the mediator in the creation of trees, mountains, and midgets. If they are really into believeing everything they hear, read, or see, then I will just draw JOE on a wall somewhere and say “LOOK, PROOF THAT HE EXISTS. HE TOUCHED ME WITH HIS STICK-LIKE GOODNESS.” That will be that and FSM will be no more. AND this is a full proof plan because I will have an autographed picture of JOE when he is 35 years old holding FSM when he was 3 1/2 months old. THE PROOF IS IN THE PICTURES!
oooo
oooooo
00000000 oooooo
00000000 00000000
00000000 ooooooooo
000000000000000
JOE (MAY 19, -834)
o->-
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Thad, you’re so close to understanding. So very close. Here’s a question to help you in your quest for knowledge. How long ago did something have to be made up for it to be real?
Think about it.
RAmen
ET
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yes, you may do that, but just remember: the fsm is using your joe scheme in another one of his delicious marinara garnished plots of the creation of a new pirate world!
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Let’s all go to the bottom of this link, and we’ll see what a Christian Evangelist who has his act together has to say about all of this:
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=letters-may-2009&sc=DD_20090508
That’s Southern Ptarmigan, at the bottom of the comments.
RAmen
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Christy,
You may be a little misguided in your spewing of hate(over love), but I must admit that you have this undeniable eloquence in your request for suicide. I accept your official standing on the cool-factor of pirates, but I find myself questioning your knowledge of religion. Thank you for your input, though; I’m sure it really means a lot to all of us Pastafarians.
I must decline, however, on blowing you.
RAmen,
PE
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I always wonder… What’s the point of refuting any of these posts; do the people even read the responses? There are, after all, lots of them. And I seriously doubt Christy will stop being hateful and intolerant any time soon, regardless of what we say. Sigh.
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It might be a free country, but that doesn’t make you, Christy, any less of a twat. Just because you can say it doesn’t mean you should. The way you bastardize the English language repulses me. Your lack of intelligence just puts your life to shame. Ever heard of think before you speak? Feel free to stop writing. Your distortion of English won’t be missed. That’s a guarantee.
With sincerity,
Chloe
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That was what they said about christianity 2000 years ago;)
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have fun drinking stale beer with std infested strippers!
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glass houses and throwing things, but cant remember what?
tunnel vision
Missing the whole point
but at least they have had their say so they can sleep better at night now, although a red creature with big horns may come to get them and take them away to a pit of fire which is wholely believceable of course..
good old sky fathers children strike again
RAmen
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@Zach,
You’re exactly right, though I’m prompted to repeat a suggestion I posted a year or so ago: Christianity is ahead of us in one area, namely, gorgeous, inspiring liturgical music, a la Bach and Haendel. Perhaps Christy’s relentless hate would be melted if we had a few Pastafarian composers to turn to? I might suggest “Pasta, Joy of Man’s Desiring” and “Strippers May Safely Shimmy” as good starters…
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I lahled at the “Realigion”
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I can’t help but think of the Crusades when I read these.
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Its a joke. How do people not get that. But its a good joke, it reflects the stupidity of the idea of religion by becoming a mockery of it.
This is ignorance of the highest order. You have not understood something, and now wish those who do and enjoy it to die in great agony and consume faeces.
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hahahaahahahahaha this is hilarious he is so angry at a thought its rly actually very funy!:D
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Yikes.
A slow, painful death?
Really?
I’m really sorry about your apparent mental illness,
but the rest of us shouldn’t have to deal with it.
Please keep your intolerance to yourself,
even if it kills you.
[...Especially if it kills you?
No, no.
That's something YOU would say.]
“Thanks, dude.”
RAmen.
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Im sorry bu to have to lower yourself to such a degree because you diagree with someone’s idea is wrong. The attitude this person has taken is an act of utter intolerance. It shows an all to ugly side of peoples religious and moral character.
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This one realy got it WE ARE NOT A REAL RELIGION, we are just PROBING A POINT.
I realy love good Christians !!!
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assholes like you annoy the fucking shit outta me. I don’t care what you think of FSM but we think his Noodlieness is awesome and i could care less what the hell you think about it. so YOU can go suck you’re uncle’s.
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@Sav
EPIC WIN
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Yes, pirates are indeed cool
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“The only cool thing is the pirate thing”
That part made me laugh.
Accept the Pirate part into you heart, and soon enough you will accept His whole noodly goodness.
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@ 159 Thad,
I see your x-tian lobotomy was a success…this one should have had his very own Hate Mail!
I just love the full proof plan!! If we could just find the well of stupidity these people drink from, could’nt we fill it up with concrete or something?
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REALigion?
Yeah.
For the purpose of this comment i will assume that you are a christian.
Your “god” appears to be very insecure about himself, doesn’t he. He seems to hate everyone, he is homophobic, indicating that he himself is insecure about his sexuality. Another indication of your gods homosexuality is his apparent hatred of all women. Women are to be cherished, not punished for being alive.
I would also like to point out that the christian “god” is supposedly responsible for the largest genoside in all history. The great flood. And you worship him. He murdered every speicies and every human on the planet, saving only two of each animal! Hello! Do you need anymore proof that he is insane?
Come to your own conclusions on this, but don’t try to press them on others this time.
RAmen
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Well, somebody has untreated Tourettes syndrom…or on the verge of en-noodlement. The noodle will set you free, but first it will bring dispair. And maybe some pirates…
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And you praise your god with that mouth? Wow. Middle school right? You need to learn how to curse properly. You just sound ignorant. Then again you probably are
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Does anyone else find it odd that all these “religious people” who are defending their god/religion are using such vulgar language… I don’t think that your god appreciates that very much
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Hi, Christy!
Just wanted to say thanks for the nice message. It seems that they’re letting children cuss earlier and earlier these days. Seeing as how yours is a violent God and wishes a slow painful torture on those, probably nicer people than most Christians, who simply wish for some evidence as to his existence. Have a great day.
Here’s to hoping His Noodly Appendage touches you,
-GM
RAmen
If you wish for a reasoned discussion on the existence of the FSM versus your various religion’s God, my e-mail is kanastag@comcast.net. Thanks!
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Dear Christy,
My condolences for you linguistic and mental impairment. However, intriguing though your primitive attempts at civilized speech are, I must inform you that there are better ways for one such as you to contribute to society. Have you, for instance, considered castration?
R’Amen,
Mostly Harmless
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i want to date that girl christy. i have always liked the name christy, and i like pirates too, and conversation would never have to be a priority.
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Do not hate his noodlyness. Embrace it, caress it, make it your own and one day you will know the true meaning of en-noodlement!
RAmen!
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I only hope that one day you can learn to embrace his epic noodleyness. Yay for Pirates! RAmen!
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“I really hope you really suffer a slow and painful death!”
What, like Jesus?
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hahahahaha it because little ass- backwards shits like u have the thoughs in ur heads that u and ur lil facioused thousand year old fuck faced christianity. hahahaha what do u think the crusades were. /// If u dont believe what we believe… we’ll hurt u… anywho… its because of ppl like u that most ppl view christianity badly… so yah… if they wanna believe in this pasta based monster, well its there right… And what gives u the right to argue… U r the reason wars are started. GO FSM!
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That’s not very Christian of you Christy…
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Could you please go learn how to spell and use grammar correctly? When you do please come back and try and prove a point. When have Pastafarins ever bashed YOUR RELIGION!?!?!
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i can’t stand people like u Ur so one minded you will not even listen to any one or any thing else. you may find it hard to believe but your god doesn’t exist either you praise a guy made everything in one day and he is all powerful and do wat he wants but how often do pray and you receive what you asked for .
plus your religion is so contradictory you believe a guy made everything but you pray to a zombie Jew who died for no reason and you think he has all the answers and you say your god loves and welcomes all of his children in to heaven buy they resent the gays and the Jews and only believe in him and don’t acknowledge any unless it is written in the bible.
you don’t want to believe in anything that is not in a book.
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I fail to understand why you’re so worked up over our so-called “hobby.”
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Agreed. The pirates are sweet.
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You’re all insane. Ninjas are clearly waaaaaaay awesomerer than pirates.
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I love the use of “tard” at the end of a word, use them quite often; but I have never heard, “blow me tard”. Perhaps he could use my personal favourite, quadro-spazed wrong-tard?
ALL HAIL THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER!!!!!!
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to zach 164. most likely not man do read the responses,but hey we all do and thats great!best responses ive ever read,witty,intelligent and non abusive,now that takes restraint!well done to all posters never take anything too seriously(within reason)especially religion!great laughs thanks:)
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