I would love to beat the living tar out of each and every one of you

Published November 18th, 2008 by Bobby Henderson

I would love little more than to beat the ever living tar out of each and every one of you. However, Jesus says i shouldn’t, because it is wrong. Jesus says for us to control our sinful impulses and be nice people. I want to be a nice person, and whenever im not as nice as i could be i say to myself,the greatest glory is not in never failing but in rising each time you fall. That, i believe, is the fundamental difference between atheist and Christians. Atheists say evil is just our primal nature. Christians say evil is both wrong and controllable. May the LORD Jesus rule over God’s people forever Amen.
-Squiggledorf



408 Responses to “I would love to beat the living tar out of each and every one of you”

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  1. matt says:

    “Atheists say evil is just our primal nature.”

    What about the atheists who say morals are “just our primal nature?”

    • nun s equator says:

      yay 4 reason.

  2. cordoba says:

    Do you introduce yourself to the ladies as Squiggledorf? I bet your already beating the living tar out of a noodly appendage, so your almost a convert already! There are some anger issues for those at the precipice of an epiphany. Don’t fight it man!

  3. nun s equator says:

    PLEASE seek out alternate response 2 BEATING people…i have noticed people whom go around threatening this way can find the fight u seek & that is NOT a good thing, i do not want any1 beaten, 2 learn of any1 beaten or interested in doing it- if u do as u say & go after any1 here, now kno u have ALSO set a precedent, by mailing in intentions & fyi some1 HACKED our device…which means, urs can b, which = please dont beat any1, over anything.

  4. nun s equator says:

    letters like this frighten me…jesus, violence, jesus jesus violence?

    ok, now we’ve learned, jo pa has died..several hours ago. do things just go from bad 2 worse this way with everything?? we r not fans, but didnt want 2 c him go out so badly this way…& i bring this up because we r told a BAPTIST CHURCH is planning on PICKETING the guys FUNERAL?????! W H Y, 4 the love of humanity, y picket the FUNERAL? A church picketing a funeral. PLEASE aside from ur theme park plans, sign us up 4 a waiting list 4 next rocketship off the planet, if u happen 2 learn of any…but make sure no church picketers r on the flight…????

    • Olio says:

      Picketing funerals is a pointless pursuit. Anything so offensive the departed may have done is a done deal. If the picketers believe god is with them on that why use signs at all? If god is in agreement already, there should be only trust and no need for protesting. Does anyone picket picketers funerals when they die? Like with signs, reading No More Picketing? Probably not.

  5. Alphy says:

    “Jesus says…”

    “Jesus says…” Jesus says…”

    Aren’t any of you fundies capable of thinking for yourselves? And; do you know for a fact that Jesus said everything that is ascribed to him? Hell, NO! Are you afraid to think independantly, be a free thinker? Hell, YES! Have fundies scared you into not questioning, just obeying tactics or your savation will be in question? You would never admit it they did. You would make excuses for them.

    If you want to allow your mind and life to be controlled by a pack of ignorant self-righteous hypocrits that is your choice. Many have stopped glorifying ignorance and have learned to think for themselves without and not wanting the approval of the religiously ‘superior’.

  6. Kirby_mongerr says:

    we would take your beating and tell you “the flying spaghetti monster loves you, accept his noodley appendage”

    ramen

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