Hello, I am a Christian

Published October 2nd, 2008 by Bobby Henderson

Hello, I am a Christian, and I would just like to know, is their any proof of FSM? If so can you please show me the proof, or explain it to me over the web please, I am curios to know. I personally believe this is just some silly religion thought up by an over active imaginative mind of someone. Who told others, and the few that believed him were hopeless in life as it was to begin looking for someone to lead them, and show them the way, so they just followed whatever he said. ( much like scientology)

-Divooneh



392 Responses to “Hello, I am a Christian”

  1. Dan says:

    Yar! Welcome Divooneh! Avast! That’s an unusual name you have there!

    What proof do we have;

    1. Milions of people share our faith, millions of people can’t be wrong!
    2. If there was no Spaghetti Monster, how do you explain the complexity of the Universe? It must have been created by the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
    3. If you have faith and occasionally dress in full pirate regalia, you will be rewarded in Heaven with a beer volcano. How can you not believe in a Flying Spaghetti Monster that loves us enough to give us a perfect afterlife?!!!!
    4. We have a graph! Yar!
    5. What proof do you have that he DOESN’T exist?

    I know this can seem pretty silly to a lot of people but Christianity is also pretty silly in parts! I mean coming back from the dead? A virgin birth in a mamalian species? This is why you must have FAITH in the FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER who will give us life after death with STRIPPERS AND BEER VOLCANOS!!!!! RAmen!

    What type of Christian are you (there are so many, you can’t all be right)? What proof do you have your Christian sect’s “God” exists?

  2. A.Gweeok says:

    Hello, I am a Pastafarian, and I would just like to know, is their any proof of JC? If so can you please show me the proof, or explain it to me over the web please, I am curios to know. I personally believe this is just some silly religion thought up by an over active imaginative mind of someone. Who told others, and the few that believed him were hopeless in life as it was to begin looking for someone to lead them, and show them the way, so they just followed whatever he said. ( much like scientology)

    -Anonymous Gweeok

  3. Plague Chicken says:

    Do I dare point out the incredible hilarity at having a Xian come and question how in the world it is possible that people could possibly believe in something with no direct evidence to support it?

    The idea that Divooneh could write that post in a non-satirical manner fills me with disbelief. I truly hope (oh, how I hope) that this was a cleverly worded jab at the phrase ‘blind faith’ as it applies to the teaching purported to have been those of Jesus. Jesus, who may or may not have existed, who may or may not have said any of those things. A figure, who’s ‘story’ was told to others who told others, and the few that believed them were hopeless in life as it was to begin looking for someone to lead them, and show them the way, so they just followed whatever he said.

    * I just couldn’t resist a heaping helping of irony *

    cheers

    PC

  4. Pete says:

    Divooneh, your whole post is the EXACT reason for FSM. If you re-read your post then factor in Christian elements, I think you’ll find you’ll have the same questions.

  5. The Bartos says:

    Is there any proof that there was a guy like Jesus?
    is there any proof that god exists?

  6. Alicia says:

    Dear Divooneh –

    Hi – I’m not a Christian. So can you please show me proof of Jesus Christ? Of the immaculate conception? Of the parting of the Red Sea? Of God? Of Noah and the flood? Of heaven or hell? If so, can you please explain it to me, this proof? I am curious to know. I personally believe this is just some silly religion thought up by an over active imaginative mind of someone. It seems Christianity is used in so many destructive ways. Please explain.

  7. Chris666 says:

    Um, well. Three Cheers to Stumble! Anyways… as far as the FSM is concerned……proof? need there be any? Christendom has no proof of virtually any of its dogma either. What very little evidence there is of even the man Jesus comes from a pretty questionable source(i do not recall any scholar making the claim that Josephus is a reliable, objective source. Let alone the claim of the man Jesus was Christ or if it were later edited into the texts). But the point of religion is to have faith. Anyone may, thankfully, believe in anything they will. Some prefer to have conviction to ideals rather than an institution of organized religion. So be it. Some may seek absolute knowledge rather than faith in the unknown. So be it. But really, your entire last sentence may be applied in its entirety to early Christianity.

    and as for my posting name, it is a combination of my name and the numerals of my drivers license number, which does end in 666……makes me wish i believed in the devil :D

  8. Nick Novitski says:

    Your concern is highly ironic.

    To claim to be Pastafarian is to point a finger at all “serious” religions and laugh heartily. There is exactly as much proof of the FSM as there is in any other god, including your sun god, Christ (or, if you prefer, your sky god, YHVH). We would say that all religions are silly, and “thought up by an over active imaginative mind of someone.”

    Unlike Scientology or Christianity, Pastafarianism costs no money, and demands no displays of loyalty or submission. It’s appeal is not based on a desire to be lead or given hope, but to enjoy yourself in the face of the sometimes brutally depressing behavior people exhibit in the name of religion (mass murder, torture, oppression, hate, ignorance, etc). It reminds us how silly the idea of invisible people in the clouds really is, and gives us the best possible invisible person to follow: one that wants us to relax, chill out, get along, etc.

    If you have ever found yourself “hopeless in life” and “looking for someone to lead” you, you’re very vulnerable to people taking advantage of you via your faith. Please be careful with your money and time: both of them are precious, but the latter is of fixed and limited supply, and spending any of it bowing down to idols and idol-bearers for the sake of silly ideas and swelling egos is probably not worth it.

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