Dear dumb ass folowers of FSMism,
There have been a lot of weird things that i have seen in my life before, but this tops them all. Do you really believe that there is/was such a thing as a flying spaghetti monster? Seriously, how fucking old are you? I know there’s such a thing as freedom of speech and expression, but this kinda shit should be banned. Theres is only one God and one Holy Word. Why dont you people get that? How much sense does it make to say that decreasing numbers of pirates lead to an increase in average global temperature? Is that science or some fifth grader trying to sound smart?
You are the kinds of people I dread to meet in public. If I were to ever have the displeasure of meeting your retarded ass, I would probably beat you senseless untill your stupid childish mind thought like a normal person and believed in something that sounds correct instead of just saying “Eh, lets make a new religion..and what the hell, our ‘god’ should be a clump of spaghetti. Oh, and it should have eyes and be able to fly. Lets bow down to it and see how many people follow suit!”
Damn you all to hell!! Better yet, somebody should lock you in a fucking psychiatric ward for further examination because they obviously didnt do that enough when you dumb fucks were born. I hope this web page is taken off the web as quickly as it was put up.
–Sincerly,
ANNONYMOUS
Dear dumb ass folowers of FSMism
Published by Bobby Henderson October 30th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 565 Comments
565 Responses to “Dear dumb ass folowers of FSMism”
Lmao, there are just times when we all should realize that there are some things in the world that the main stream fundamentalist christians just wont get, like clever ideas and annalogies, good music, respecting each others believes and sometimes just common logic. HaHa just an annonymous facist retard, hope your god likes your sarcasm otherwise hell is calling your annonymous name… Peace Out
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Genius. I love when people don’t see the irony… xD
~Ania z Wrocławia
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Wow. Very naive, if this is real.
I am a religiously inclined person myself (yes, Christian); and I love the flying spaghetti monster. It brings a wonderful perspective and levity to religious dogma that has been missing. If you are going to believe something; it should be because you’ve actually thought about it and have found truth in it.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Hilariously braindead posting “Anonymous”! Pity you’re too chicken-shit to actually post a name with your retarded flaming email. There are ample people, me among them, who would take equal pleasure in confronting retarded people like you in public and giving you a blanket party til you realized the numerous errors of your narrow, shallow and wholeheartedly vacuous mind…
Oh, and by the way, rather than wasting your brain on some so-called “holy” text like the bible, why don’t you try a dictionary.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Christians and/or catholics eat the body of christ ( in cracker form ) . I’d rather eat our god with a piece of garlic toast !!!!!!!!!!!!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
y’all got trolled
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
hahahahahahahahahahaah. This just makes me laugh.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Now, I may be mistaken, but I think the ENTIRE idea for the Flying Spaghetti Monster was created to make people like YOU realize how ridiculous religion is. And you don’t do a good job of disproving this. Calling yourself a Christian and then saying you’re going to, er, “beat you senseless” is not something Jesus would do, is it? Hypocrite.
Anyway, FSM was created because of people like you. The point of it is to make people realize how ridiculous a religion is and yet how easy it is to accumulate followers. Imagine this, if you can: the Flying Spaghetti Monster sounds as ridiculous to you as YOU sound to many people. Have some respect. How is FSM any more unbelievable than a dead guy who came back to life and floated into the sky? Really. You are just displaying a case of ethnocentrism, meaning you only believe that your beliefs are right.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Hahaha… exactly! Do the old switcharoo with the words “Christianity” and “Flying Spaghetti Monster” and you’ve got our feelings towards institutionalized religion!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
What’s this about only one god and the Holy Word? Freedom of speech and Religion means you can believe whatever you want. I don’t believe in the Bible, and you know why? Because I think it’s bullshit. This stuff isn’t illegal because it’s IN THE FUCKING CONSTITUTION. Maybe you’re the stupid fifth grader for not thinking of that. Second, If you believe in a God who tells you to beat the shit out of someone because they think in a strange way, you are one sick fuck, and so is your God, because he’s telling you it’s ok to attack the innocent, an action I’m pretty sure the Bible contradicts.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
christianity isn’t about hatred. so why do the haters call themselves a christian?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
It doesn’t say hes a christian….? this person could be from some other religion….
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I’m so glad I’m an atheist. :)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
lol he doesn’t realize it’s parody
/discussion
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
dude you totally missed the boat on this one. i pity you and your closed minded sect. may the FSM show you mercy – RAmen
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Why is this stumble, i mean seriously, i supposed randomness can affect a little in one’s feelings but hey, at least i would mind something interesting not just silly cheap “manifest” hahaha, well some people are stupid.
Oh by the way, hell sounds like a threat, maybe it helps you’re argument.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Wow, it appears satire and humor are lost on this Einstein!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Ironic that he believes beating someone senseless will make them think like a normal person. I bet his familial and sexual relationships are similar and very special. If I were to ever have the displeasure of meeting his retarded ass, it would only take about five minutes for me to have him licking dog crap off the sole of my shoe while begging me to let him take an enema…Let me know when you’re ready Annonymous, anytime.
-Sincerly
BILLY
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Dear FSMists:
I have tried to fight these hungers since first hearing of the FSM, but i can contain them no longer. I have an irresistable urge to eat your God. There, I said it, I feel better already.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
May a hail of parmesan cheese descend on all non-believers.
When it rains tomato sauce for forty days and forty nights and they are treading water like so many desperate meatballs, their tune will change.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
The pirate decrease/global warming increase ratio is proven yet further! With all the Somalian pirate attacks being at the forefront of the news, it’s interesting to note that the Midwest is going through an early cold spell this fall.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Dead dumb-ass, psuedo-illiterate, violent, hypocritical and overall asshole (also known as ANNONYMOUS, or, a misspelling of Anonymous),
Go cry “Hellfire! Sinners! Repent!” to someone who cares. You’re only setting yourself up for a verbal beating.
Oh, and learn to spell properly and fix up your vocabulary while you’re at it: otherwise it’s that much more obvious that you haven’t come across
a) puberty, and
b) education.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Whereas I agree with the Spirit(and He is Holy) of what you are saying in your message, but please think about this: You don’t have to agree with FSM but at least clean up your language and be more presentable for a family friendly website. you can say the same thing without showing us your flair for the swear words. Do grow up.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
violent, hateful christian PWNED!!!! by spaghetti commenters!!! luvz it. religion is the ONE SINGLE CAUSE of ALL war on this planet. and yet the segregated self-righteous, secular masses keep telling themselves that their god is full of infinite love and they just keep chanting the right name and they’ll live in eternal bliss. that sounds to me like a fear of death. i’m gonna die someday. i know it and accept it. whatever is beyond that, if anything, is not to be comprehended by the living, therefore should not be argued, idolated, propogated, and especially FOUGHT ABOUT!!!! however i’m all for punching douchebags in the face here on this earthly existence, and this moron ANONYMOUS, sir, i would love to see you try to beat me senseless for adding some competition to your retarded guy-on-a-plank religion. u could meet ur maker that much quicker. dipshit.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
It looks as if the joke is on you! This entire religion was created to poke fun at all religions as a whole. Stop for a second and think how idiotic all religions sound, and you will see that the FSM is no different. At least this religion doesn’t have 200+ contradictions within its text, and have hundreds of different sections with an old testament, a new, the new international, etc. Men that had no idea how their wives became pregnant or where the sun went at night wrote the bible. At least these guys have the common sense to know that all the current religions sound just as (if not more) ridiculous. Get mad jesus freak!!!!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Are u guys Srs?
FSM is the most retarded idea i have ever heard of/
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Hahaha, this is completely ridiculous. I am not even a member here or anything, good old stumble upon apparently thought that you were an idiot to. It seems to throw me at pages depicting a religious fanatic making a complete ass of himself often enough… may be because I’m atheist? Who knows… /You/ are definitely the kind of Christian that ruins it for the few out there that are good. I do not condemn /all/ of the Christians, only because recently I have visited a church with a friend of mine, one where I’ve yet to even be confronted on being an atheist… though it is known, and all they have spoken of is ACCEPT AND LOVE EVERYONE UNCONDITIONALLY. Oh, but such a rare thing it is. I have been to other churches, and also seen man idiotic fanatics like you, proving again and again that /most/ Christians don’t even know how to follow their own religion. You are just an asshole who can’t seem to accept that you are wrong, and always will be. You go around and try to tear everyone else down, merely to make yourself feel more right. It’s childish really, to think that your fairy tale is any better than all the others. That is all any of them are, fairy tales. You want to know why you hate seeing things like this FSM religion. It is because you realize it is blatantly pointing out each and every fault in your own religion, and you cannot stand to have your precious bullshit shown to the world.
-Chaos
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I hope you guys see the irony in this letter.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
You do realize that the Flying Spaghetti Monster was primarily created in the same fashion as the Invisible Pink Unicorn right? It’s only there to put into perspective how retarded you are.
Saying that you talk to god everyday makes you sound religious, but if you talk to god through a hair dryer, that makes you insane. I don’t see how adding an object changes your sanity. Get the idea now?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
HA! learn how to spell, dear! LOVE YA FSM! :)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
oh why do you have to be so rude? we never did anything to you! >>(I think)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Crazy bible thumper. I’ve never been to this site before, but it seems to me that it’s meant to be a joke. Does that person actually believe that people that come here believe in a Flying Spaghetti Monster?! lol Some people will use any excuse to be an ass…
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Out God is a jealous god. You FSM god has no chance against the God of the old testament. Be aware! And be scared!
old testament steb
(we also have a lot of missles and jets and stuff)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Dueling banjo’s tune .. Why are they writing it actually if he met me in public and tried to kick my ass, he would be seeing the inside of an ambulance. Still as they say swearing is the crutch for inarticulate fuckers. Face it he was looking for some porn I mean some of those Shemales really look good don’t they
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I don’t think An(n)onymous is a real person. Furthermore, I suspect it was someone using satire to make fun of crazy people. Who knows, it could have been someone(Bobby Herderson) trying to drum up support for FSM using fear. At least I really hope so.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I actually TAUGHT 5th grade, and two of the literary terms we learned were “irony” and “satire”. I believe “hypocrisy” and “fascism” are freshman English terms. On another note, since I am a masochistic hedonist not bound by your own self-professed christian ideals, I’d absolutely LOVE to see you take a stab at beating my ass senseless. Good luck!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“Eh, lets make a new religion..and what the hell, our ‘god’ should be a clump of spaghetti. Oh, and it should have eyes and be able to fly. Lets bow down to it and see how many people follow suit!”
Ok.. but how about?
“Eh, lets make a new religion.. and what the hell, our ‘god’ should be something we can’t see, in a place that we can’t see. Oh, and he can see everything we do. And he will send us to hell if we do ANYTHING wrong. Lets bow down to him, and hell, lets give him a son too!. We’ll bow down to them, and hate anyone who disagrees with us. And we shall call it, Christianity.”
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
um, next time you want to bash someone’s preferred religion, maybe you should investigate the Christian Church and their policy of kill the non-believers. Crusades, anyone?
I think you are just intimidated by His Noodliness. Don’t fear the wonderful Noodly Appendages, for it is people like you that he exists for.
Long story short, FSM is a religion created in answer to Christianity and idiots like you. It’s message is tolerance, and you just proved the point.
Congrats, oh, and ANNONYMOUS, learn how to spell. What, did you go to school in Kansas?
it’s ANONYMOUS. One N.
As in Noodle.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Ok, FLYING SPAGHETTI, OH NO NO… WAIT, WITH EYEES?
C’MOOON! WHAT FOLLOWS? ITALY THE BIG PARADIIIISE!!!?
Sorry but… if this guy is retarded… I don’t even know how the hell call you people… really.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
hey, “Annonymous”,
one thing: if you’re going to tell people that they are stupid, then you had better spell your own name right.
and if there is just one Word of “God”, then it must be either very long or very hard to pronounce. I bet that’s why church takes hours. Seriously.
We all need to respect everyone and their choices, whether that be “God” or a giant bundle of flying spaghetti. We don’t have to agree, but we need to act like adults and be mature and face the fact that everyone believes something different.
Peace, Love and Chocolate. That’s all the world needs.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I lol’d
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“Do you really believe that there is/was such a thing as a flying spaghetti monster?”
As much as I believe in any other god… How old are you? Is the concept of sarcasm totally new to you? ^^
“Seriously, how fucking old are you?”
I asked first :P
“I know there’s such a thing as freedom of speech and expression, but this kinda shit should be banned. Theres is only one God and one Holy Word.”
So there’s freedom of speech but only one true opinion. Right. And there’s only _one_ holy word? There are how many christian movements in the US? 50? Which of the dozens of translations of te bible is the right one?
“Why dont you people get that? How much sense does it make to say that decreasing numbers of pirates lead to an increase in average global temperature? Is that science or some fifth grader trying to sound smart?”
How much sense does it make to say that some guy died on the cross a few thousand years ago? Any proof? Any?
“You are the kinds of people I dread to meet in public. If I were to ever have the displeasure of meeting your retarded ass, I would probably beat you senseless untill your stupid childish mind thought like a normal person and believed in something that sounds correct instead of just saying “Eh, lets make a new religion..and what the hell, our ‘god’ should be a clump of spaghetti.”
Nice one. First of all it’s “kind of people”. Do yourself a favor and learn your own language. I learned it in school 10 years ago and still seem to have a better grasp of the concept of english…
Second: there you go :) “Turn the other cheek” is only for christians, beat up all the others ^^ Problem might be that I’m 1.90m and around 120 kg, so pleaaaaaaase get yourself a shirt stating your opinion because my religion doesn’t say it’s bad to beat someone up till they spit blood…
“Damn you all to hell!!”
Hell is a rather buggy concept. Never got the hang of it…
“Better yet, somebody should lock you in a fucking psychiatric ward for further examination because they obviously didnt do that enough when you dumb fucks were born.”
That from a guy threatening people to beat them up because they have a different opinion defending a religion which killed hundred thousands of innocent people. Nice one…
“I hope this web page is taken off the web as quickly as it was put up.”
I hope you have enough common sense to trust in science if you ever get sick, praying won’t bring you far…
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
HAHA ITS FUNNY BECAUSE HE DOESNT UNDERSTAND THAT FSM IS A SATIRE OF HIS GOD AND BELIEFS HAHA
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
the only thing thats funnier than Christianity; Christians
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Hahaha. Niiiiice. If there is one lesson I’ve learned in life, it’s that people only degenerate into name-calling, violence threatening fools when they feel genuinely threatened. Good job, FSM’ers. I salute you.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
ITs funny cause some one getting mad at this religion is even more stupid then the way this guy makes this religion sound
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
go you FSM. this guy needs a life & I MEAN NEEDS A LIFE. WTF A TOTAL LOSER.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
There`s only one god? And you think you think? Poor imbecile, your head is up your ass. Yes, that spaguetti monster thing is stupid but you are the champion of the idiots, believing in a fucked up god and trying to preach your smart trash anonymously…The point is you are as fucked up as a crack whore. Die in a fucking fire.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“You are the kinds of people I dread to meet in public.”
You meet us everyday, asshole. We’re just not the type of people who go around preaching our beliefs to others. We live and let live. You want to believe in Jesus? Fine. Others want to believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Great. I worship my friend’s tattoo of Jesus riding a dinosaur; Jesusaurus Rex.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
–Sincerly,
ANNONYMOUS
lrn2grammer dumbfucks
Like or Dislike:
0 
0