ang on ang on , ang abaat , u fink that theres a big ball of italian food at the pearly gates . do you even realise how offensive this may be to some christians ! , pastafarians r u stupid or wat . get a life ur no worse that them jahovis wittneses or dem ary chrishna ones . u need to get out more u kno. my brain capacity is bigger then urs
…………../´¯/).. ..………(\¯`\
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…../´¯/…./´¯\… ……../¯`\….\¯`\
.././…/…./…./. |_……_|.\….\… .\…\.\..
(.(….(….(…./.) ..)..(..(.\….)…. )….).)
.\…………….\/ …/….\…\/…… ……….-morgan
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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Well, this is a breath of fresh air!
We’ve got some ethnic flavor, (cockney?) a reasonable question, a few mild insults, no swear words, and to top it off, a beautiful piece of ASCII art. (Looks a bit like Kryten giving the double bird.) Puts a smile on my face.
Well done!
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Fake hate mail, how boring.
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A creative user of punctuation for sure. It juts seems a shame that it’s not used properly in between the _words_…
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Considering your wonderful and inteligent writing style, I’d be suprised if you had any brain capacity whatsoever…
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Fake.
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How is believing in the Flying Spaghetti Monster offensive to some christians?
Thanks for your feedback.
Lots of love, may his Noodliness Touch you,
Theo
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No, this one is a joke. Too much intentional stupidity.
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This has got to be fake. No one could possibly be this stupid.
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Wow. What do you call someone who is pretending to be a troll? Spelling phonetically, purposefully misusing punctuation… Morgan, come over to the Noodly side! You can actually use that brain! We like it when people think! Join us! JOIN US!
By the by. ASCII art went out in the eighties.
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Methinks I spy a troll!
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oooo…ASCII art. We are obviously dealing with a much higher form of life. :P The obvious lack of understanding of the English language is even more proof! Aliens are among us! Or maybe its just a bored fundy. I dunno.
Mare
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…..nevermind, not really worthy of a response…..
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Uh, well, at least most of us can spell. Fascinating ASCII-art, though.
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Nobody is really this illiterate… this must be fake. I mean, I like the irony of someone saying “my brain capacity is bigger then urs” in a post like this, but seriousely…
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Kan u spell?
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Wow. Indecipherability, bad spelling, bad grammar – this note has it all! Oh, wait, no cussing and no reference to us being gay. But the nonsequitor at the end about brain capacity is a nice touch. Well done!
Arg
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awwwwwwwww…..i so enjoy hearing from our developementally challenged supporters. sweet picture of the all-mighty appendages.
.
remember to keep your helmet on tight while youre riding the short-bus, O.K. skippy.
.
Paul M.
confirmed Pirate,
irate Canadian.2
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lol, now I’m starting to think the hate mailers are trying to complement us. Since it appears only thoes with the reading capacity of a 7year old and writting of a phone texter seem to be able to respond to us.
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I call Poe’s Law on this one. If it turns out to be real, then you fail at ASCII and life. About your brain being larger than ours…does that include you know how to spell words correctly, use punctuation and correct use of capital letters? With a bigger brain, I can only imagine that you know how to correctly spell ‘are’ and ‘you’ along with a series of other words.
-
~Mariner, spelling and grammar corrector
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Christians aren’t supposed to get offended, that’s what the whole “Turn the other cheek” stuff is about, you feckless chav.
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O-kay. Please, please, please, for the love of Pasta, tell me this is a joke. Seriously, nobody is THAT dumb. O_o
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your brain capacity might be great but your english isn´t
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Comicbook guy – “Worst fake hatemail, ever.”
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Well Morgan I see you are smart enough to make that big elaborate sign on the bottom of the page but not smart enough to use correct grammar.
To be perfectly honest I had to read this whole thing twice to understand what you were saying.
We never said that His Holy Noodleness is at the Pearly Gates. We have our own heaven so we don’t really need yours. I like to believe instead of having Pearly Gates we have Breadstick Gates.
Well since we offend Christians because our religion has a God and a Heaven that means every religion with similar beliefs have the same problem with Christians. Wait, aren’t Christians suppose to be tolerant? So if every religion offends them then wouldn’t that make them non-tolerant? Well that makes them hypocrites then doesn’t it? So how can we truly believe any of their faith-based claims? I do know however that everything in Pastafarianism can be backed up by scientific facts.
Looks like your religion is just a big hypocritical ball of nothing.
RAmen
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My God, a survivor from the dot-matrix printer era…
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the sad part is his brain capacity IS probably bigger then mine, I sure wish I could make those awesome pictures with my keyboard D:
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Come to think of it, I haven’t seen an ASCII FSM yet…
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Well I think we can guess whose parents are brother & sister. So how exactly is it offensive to Christians? The FSM heaven has a beer volcano & strippers no pearly gates were mentioned I checked, that and ever used a dictionary mate you should get a spanking for the spelling mistakes alone. Now how big is your brain capacity? I could find out quite easily with an ice pick that’ll make your ears burn.
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Your brain’s capacity may be bigger than ours, but we’re actually using it.
Does anyone have any idea what they hell that thing is on the bottom? It looks kinda like two hands giving the ever kind christian gesture of “fuck off”.
You know, morgan, some Pastafarians may find that offensive. r u stupid or wat
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Um… I hope to FSM that your brain capacity is not bigger than mine because the meaning of how stupid I would have to be for that is mind boggling.
But ignoring that point, how is the CoFSM any more offensive to christians than any other religion. You think you’re right about your god so should that not mean in your opinion every other religion is wrong? So why do you take special offense at the FSM? We have never said anything about there being pearly gates in heaven so perhaps you are making connections to your own religion because deep down you realize just how silly it is to believe in an invisible man who lives in the sky.
And my last comment for you right now is, if your god is omnipotent, then he should have the power to take the form of a Flying Spaghetti Monster. Can you prove he hasn’t? Can you prove that a Flying Spaghetti Monster doesn’t exist? If you cannot answer yes to either of these questions, maybe it’s time to reevaluate your beliefs.
RAmen
Peace and Long Life,
Zane
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Obviously a joke. Not worthy of comment.
RAmen
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“my brain capacity is bigger then urs ”
Clearly.
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At least WE can speak and write like functioning human beings.
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troll?
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does he even realise how offencive it is to think it might be offencive that we believe in a different diety than him?
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oh dear, seems we have a seriously bad case on our hands (or noodley appendages, as the case may be). I suggest that you learn english, because the only thing I understand in the statement is “u fink that theres a big ball of italian food at the pearly gates”.
Well, not particularly, because, you see, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is a spaghetti-and-meatballs god, not a “big ball of italian food”. For that matter, I really doubt there are any pearly gates. He’s not Saint Peter, he’s the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
As to “jahovis wittneses [sic]“, we are hardly forcing our views upon anyone. Rather, you are forcing your opinion upon us! Quite the ironic turn around, if you understand what irony is – but considering your grasp of satire, I rather doubt it. Here’s a hint: blacksmiths don’t make stuff out of it.
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Yea… Your brain capacity is bigger than mine. Thats why you spell ‘know’ ‘kno’ and ‘you’ ‘u’ and dont use correct grammar like smart people do. Do you realize how offensive christianity is to most other religions in the world? Do you realize how many times christianity has seen fit to exterminate those other religions? Go back to church and read your bible again. You might learn something.
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-morgan
First of all.. learn to spell.
Second of all, if you talk like you write, then man, your’e just inherently offensive to the english language. And that ASCII art (although cool), is offensive to the human race.
Learn some serenity with all that brain capcity you have, you might do some good.
loky
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How many people here have heard of satire?
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I’ll start worrying about offending christians when they start being concerned about how much they offend me.
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Is this english?
you know, english is not my natiuve language, so just in case I ask…
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I’m actually impressed with the middle finger picture. You’d think a person with that kind of attention to detail could spell a word or two correctly.
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Morgan,
Judging by your grammar and spelling, and the fact that you insult not only pastafarians, but also jahovis wittneses and hindoos, while defending christianity, leads me to believe you are not only closed minded, but contradicts your claim of having a “larger brain capacity”.
Also, if you had at least looked up who Chrishna was, you would have found that he was basically the same person in almost every respect as your Jesus, so by insulting the people who worship Chrishna, you are insulting everyone who worships Jesus, which obviously includes yourself.
So Morgan, take my advice and at least know what you’re insulting before posting something that makes you look like an idiot.
Ramen,
Corey
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Normally I don’t wish for people to die in a car fire, but you just are such a good candidate.
You can’t even copy paste properly. That only ups the FAIL level!
I hear by give you a FAIL… no… a PHAIL level of 9.8/10. Now please just… go away you stupid stupid phailure…
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OM(FSM)G! it’s the first one even I can lagh on his speling!
any way, do you know haw much the christen god is offensiv to me?! saying the grait lord of the world is a shovenist, merderer, pro rape and pro slavery?
thats blestafomy!
the grait FSM wold never aprove of that!
any way i love’d the picter =]
gona pot it in my blog
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Funy how these disbelievers are all bloody awful at spelling. Does this suggest that all religious nutters are dim? Discuss.
Ramen
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How’s that, then?
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While the other hate mail that has been sent was bad, this is just too much. I’m calling Poe’s Law on this guy.
May you be touched by His noodly appendage,
Spartan
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Do you realize how offensive this letter is to Pastafarians? and also, if your going to send a letter to a religious group insulting them, it is best not to speak in the tongue of their ancestors.
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Also, we need to get out more? You’re the one who makes middle fingers out of slashes and periods.
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