THIS IS ALL ABSOLUTE BULLFUCK.
YOU PPL ALL REALLY BELIEVE IN A FUCKIN FLYING DINNER…..
GO DIE MUTHAFUCKERS
-franklin
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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No, Franklin isn’t a turtle – he’s Charlie Brown’s little black friend. If Charles Schultz was alive today he’s wash his mouth our with soap. Then maybe have him spit on Pig Pen to get a “two-fer”.
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With some editing this could be a lovely Haiku:
This is all Bullfuck
Belief in Flying Dinners
Die muthafuckers
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Well done Mr. Franklin. Your wit and charm are only exceeded by the logic of your well thought out arguments. Clearly your knowledge and debating skills far outpace any one of us lowly, what was it you called us? , Oh yes MUTHAFUCKERS that was it. I beg you Mr. Franklin in the future please turn your intellectual sights elsewhere lest you destroy our humble (yet tasty) religion with your masterful arguments against an deity of pasta.
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Proof, if it were needed, that the fervently religious don’t know how to swear properly.
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We have 3 questions:
1. How does the FSM affect individual morality and help guide social behavior?
2. Can we have the recipe?
3. Some of us are vegan- what do we do? We feel uncomfortable worshiping meatballs and non-vegan pasta. Something with balls.
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Is it me or is this poster just another humorless and clueless imbecile? I mean, really. Some of the language used Bible-believing “Christians” is the sort of thing that would disappoint their savior greatly. He never told anybody to be angry when they were attacked for the faith (as if Pastafarians were personally attacking Christians in the first place). But, I suppose it’s the funda*mental*ist (and I do mean “mental”) mindset. Such a pity.
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We have 3 questions:
1. How does the FSM affect individual morality and help guide social behavior?
He does it in many ways – but we don’t know for sure. We believe you take responsibility for your actions. But until someones proofs otherwise, the FSM touches us with his Noodly Appendages.
2. Can we have the recipe?
Of what?
3. Some of us are vegan- what do we do? We feel uncomfortable worshiping meatballs and non-vegan pasta. Something with balls.
That’s ok. Leave out the meat then, that’s perfectly fine. It’s not that our Deity will judge you on it or anything.
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Let me get it straight.
You don’t agree with us, so we should die.
Make perfect sense. Seems to work so well for Muslims. Hooray religion!
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Evidently this guy believes only airline food was meant to fly.
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Home schooling for religous purposes should be banned. It makes generations of dumb people.
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Wowzers…
He sure showed us… guess I’m gonna go convert to a less “Bullfuck” religion… like scientology for instance.
RAmen! (for perhaps the final time)…
Sarcastically yours,
Cap’m Red Tom
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What is “bullfuck?”
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Franklin is neither a turtle, nor the missing link. I also seriously doubt that he is a medium ‘channeling’ the wit and repartee of the late Oscar Wilde.
Franklin is, of course, a Fabulous Furry Freak Brother, although he must be pushing sixty by now, which explains all the extra medication he has to take.
The way I see it, as long as Franklin is abusing us on the internet he is not spending his time shouting at people in supermarket queues; hanging around badly lit parking structures in a slightly creepy way; or sitting in a puddle of his own urine on the bus. It’s better for society this way.
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Well, I guess this is it. We’ve been called bullfuck. Time to go home now, huh?
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I thought “bullfuck” was a verb.
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A diner?I love greasey spoons! Maybe they have pie here…
And go die? I always thought all life was really was slowly dying after a few years of growth. Now I have hope that it’s accualy life puncuated by sudden influxes of death.
Here, have a drink and settle down. RAmen.
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Huh. Well, I confess I didn’t read all 65 comments, but I just wanted to ask…why are you all assuming Franklin is Christian? I mean, yes, most of the flaming posts here in the past have been from “people” trying to defend their loving and tolerant Jesus and/or Christian God. But I’m getting a bit unhappy with the Christian-bashing that we tend to slip into so easily.
Remember: it’s not the Christian religion FSM is necessarily unhappy with, it’s the steamrolling Christian fundamentalists in our society.
As a non-steamrolling, non-fundamentalist of the Christian persuasion, I ask you to please remember the tenets of acceptance and okay-ness we offer over our plates of noodly goodness. Let’s not replace one brand of intolerance with another.
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I really liked this. Franklin’s prose style is always teetering between post-Wodeshousian whimsy and a full-blooded manic rant but never fails to be compulsively readable, engaging, and (as you’d expect) insouciantly eloquent. As an autobiography with openly novelistic overtones (Franklin casts himself as a part-naif, part-diabolical character in a distinctively English public school caper), The plot is full of diverting incidents, plot-structures, and forward momentum but also allows Franklin room for interpolating the digressive anecdotes and cerebral meditations upon life, love, and the manifold indignities of growing up that he is so good at. Brilliant observations on the mysteries of sexuality and the profound anguish of adolescent embarrassment, as well as being a bitter-sweet comedy on the impossibility of fulfilling society’s injunctions to ‘grow up’ and ‘fit in’
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What is it that people have against the reproductive functions of cows?
And as regards the actual message, I should like to say to you, OMGLOL U MUST BE SO RITE U NO HOW 2 SPEL MUTHAFUCKER!
(for the brain-dead and/or fundies, that was irony.)
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So what if we worship dinner? Christians say their god is bread and wine, that’s just a side dish to a delicious spaghetti dinner … sounds to me like were the dominate “food based” religion. We win =)
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I agree with BullFuck. And in fact believe as he does in the fucking of bulls religion myself. After all, we Bullfuckolgists derive great pleasure from our bestiality practices and in fact own great herds of bulls ourselves for such. In fact, you may have heard of us. We’re called the Dallas Cowboys.
Signed,
Redskins Fan
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And they call me stupid. >.>’
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I bet twenty dollars this “bullfuck” is Christian.
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Does this even merit a response…?
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i have read alot of hate mail but you must be the biggest asshole that i have ever had the misfortune of encountering
suck my nuts you prick.
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be nice…
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Bullfuck?
Congrats.
You win the “I Am So Un-evolved I Can Hardly Construct A Decent Insult” Award.
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what fuck you do not look down on my religion just becouse youre dumb that is no excuse
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What a lovely Christian man!
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And you believe in an imaginary man in the sky.
You believe in some guy whose modern day image was built around the pre-existing images and powers of older gods and religions.
Maybe I believe in a flying pasta god, but you, dear friend — friend here meaning dumbass — believe in nothing at all.
Except of course, what you’re told.
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“This is absolute bullfuck”. That’s almost as good as when someone wrote me “Go fuck a melon, you hippie!”
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Wow.. Bullfuck eh.. Well all i can say it will hurt you more then it will hurt you ;) Lets not bull fuck lets ger some women into this seen Sounds good eh? I think so to
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really? bullfuck
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” THIS IS ALL ABSOLUTE BULLFUCK.
YOU PPL ALL REALLY BELIEVE IN A FUCKIN FLYING DINNER…..
GO DIE MUTHAFUCKERS
-franklin ”
Well franklin we ppl believe in a flying spaghetti dinner no more than you ppl believing in a book, probably written by a bored housewife with nothing else better to do, thousands of years ago.
The only difference is you let this book control your life, we choose to make our own decisions in life. after all that is why we have brains.
anyway religeon means jack shit in this day and age.
does your god earn you money, feed your family or allow you to be who you want to be?
er.. no. you’re just like everyone else who reads a copy of the same book and has decided to let their imaginary friends tell them what is right and wrong.
muppets. get a life and stop wasting ours with your saviour bullshit.
god and jesus are right up there with the easter bunny and father christmas.. or do you believe in them too???
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ahh anger, thats what god message is, be angry and intolerant all the time, thats the short version of the bible isnt it franklin
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Bullfuck, never heard that one before.
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wow, im…. im shocked. no sarcasm here, i truly believe youre the first person to ever think up “bullfuck”. congratulations, loser. :)
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Holy jeepers! Samuel L. Jackson hates the FSM. SMITE THE NON-BELIEVER NOODLY ONE! SMITE HIIIIM!
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franklin and all the rest tht hate us so much
…no no no, that is not the Christian way to talk, now isn’t it?
Where is all that BS about Jesus preaching peace and no killing and love your neighbor etc?
I suppose you were all out sick when Sunday school talked about that paragraph/chapter/verse.
I think we atheists call it respect, in case you are looking for the appropriate word.
Atheists unite to spread some pasta :)
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the son hath not been touched by my noodly appendage.
his uncouth behaviour will be stopped as soon as he sees my giant meatballs
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Franklin? as in the turtle? wow, they are slow.
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Does anyone else get the impression he might have missed the point?
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Hahahah! This educated gentleman is absolutely, positively amazing.
“YOU PPL ALL REALLY BELIEVE IN A FUCKIN FLYING DINNER…..”
…Heres a fun fact: There have been an estimated 330+ religions that consisted of these key points.
1. Child was born of a virgin.
2. Child was adorned by wise men/princes/kings/dukes/etc./etc.
3. Child may or may not have begun teaching at the age of 12.
4. The amazing one began his ministry at the age of 25-30 performing millions of miracles.
5. This man was unjustly crucified, hung, or otherwise tactically undone.
6. On the third day that sexy motha fucka came back from the dead and bitchslapped the human race with people like you.
So, good sir, allow me to retort. Your religion has been carbon copied for thousands of years through dozens of races, countries, continents, and cultures. The men who were the original backers of Christianity were suspected to be on the recieving end of prostitution and the opium pipe. The next time you want to speak, take a drink of water. By the way, dont mind the funny taste, its just the arsenic/bleach/chloroform coctail I added, you waste of life, oxygen, and biodegradeable material.
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LMAO your name is Franklin. We’re receiving hatemail from the fucking Nick Junior turtle.
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Hello. I like to write about controversial stuff such as this. =3 Why? Because it’s fun to prove to people like you that you are very stupid and need to pick up a book once in a while. After all, learning that others are smarter than you helps push you to grow, right?
Ok:
THIS IS ALL ABSOLUTE BULLFUCK.
YOU PPL ALL REALLY BELIEVE IN A FUCKIN FLYING DINNER…..
GO DIE MUTHAFUCKERS
Interesting. Every line uses the word “fuck.” Could it be that your vocabulary is pitifully small? Could it be that you saw the word “Pasta” and you imediately said, “FUCK!” Because that is practically all the english you know? Please reply, I’m curious. ^.^
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