holy shit quit being such pussys

Published July 12th, 2008 by Bobby Henderson

holy shit quit being such pussys damn who honstly gets affended cause they have to say god in the pledge of allegince and that christmas is a national CHRISTIAN holiday and who the fuck r we kidding you will stil except a CHRISTMAS PRESENT so all of u r fake if ur not a chritstian. so quit being assholes and go somewhere else if u dont like it…and what ever u say that this nation wasnt founded by christians is dumb cause every one knows that it was
-a person with a brain

[I thought this one was fake at first but I've changed my mind. What do you guys think? -bobby]



227 Responses to “holy shit quit being such pussys”

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  1. th3g1vr says:

    yeah it’s pretty obvious that this guy doesn’t know wtf he’s talking about. For future reference, never say words like “everyone knows”, no matter how obvious it seems, until you consult an encyclopedia (i.e. wikipedia *at the very least*. But even without looking it up, *a person with a brain* (which is normally meant to be interpreted as “think before you speak” and “an educated/intellectual person”) would remember enough from [junior high/high school/college history] to know things like that. When a person is that passionate about their religion and country, it’s kinda sad, because a lack of direction causes all that piety to go to waste :-(

    one thing I learned the hard way- don’t get too involved in your beliefs until you at least have a good understanding of what you believe in. And if you’re a Christian- read Josephus. Even if you think secular historians are liars (which when you think about it, makes no sense because *unlike Christians* secular historians are comparably unbiased, simply because they have almost no motivation to present history in anything but a accurate and factual manner. It’s not like Josephus was ignorant (read: contradiction) enough that he really though mis-represention of the facts would harm the church nearly enough to be worth risking his credibility. So you can trust what he says more than the Bible, a least from a logical standpoint.

    that, and even if he’s a liar, a fresh account is always a good thing, as it helps put the “truth” into perspective.

  2. Jochem Atteveld says:

    @184
    He’s clearly being satirical.

    @person with a brain
    You may want to examine that brain you got, as it’s spelling and grammar functions are clearly malfunctioning, as is the overall inteligence level. I’d ask my money back, if I were you.

  3. Villhelm Micles Apostolocus-Rinthle says:

    Umm… Run on sentences much? But i do agree with you in a sense. America WAS founded by christians, however, it has been, for atleast a century, perhaps more i dont know, a multicultural and multi religious nation. The constitution protects the right of people to believe whatever we want. In a sense, isnt that what pastafarianism- and america- is about? And as for your statement about christmas, thats utter crap. One of my best freinds is jewish, a proud jew at that, and still celebrates christmas every year, along side hannukah. And besides, its a known fact Xmas began as a pagan celebration of ancient rome, so, sorry, its not a Christian holiday! Peace

  4. hopeful candidate for chef onboard the flying sailing spaghetti monster cathedral/vessel says:

    G I V E T H I S N O T E T O Y O U R M O M M Y .

    i will accept a christmas present
    i will accept a halloween present
    i will accept a happy hannukah present
    i will accept a quazy quanza present
    i will accept a ” be-nice-to-your-sofa-month” present
    but i can not accept an educational system that allows you to spell the word “affended” without a resulting flogging to the genitals.

    And anytime you get these words printed after your post:
    [I thought this one was fake at first but I’ve changed my mind. What do you guys think? -bobby]
    you qualify as a retard or a comic genius.
    You sir, (and i use the term loosely) are the former.

    Have someone read this to you.

    G I V E T H I S N O T E T O Y O U R M O M M Y .

  5. Trevor says:

    Thank god Native Americans are Christian… Oh wait nevermind I have no brain… I must know nothing. If the guy that wrote that hate mail reads this, thought you should know that the only reason you have a brain is because the FSM wanted to make sure that we knew how miniscule the work that went on in it was, have a great day dumbass.

    rAmen,

    Trevor

  6. ddd says:

    Possible link?

    The stronger the faith, the less educated the person. With his language skills, I’d be suprised if this one’s even made it past the first few pages of the Wholey Bibel

  7. Schroedinger's Dog says:

    Well, I get my happy Saturnals present every year. Not my fault if YOUR sect decided to set a holyday on the same day for obvious political reasons!

  8. Princess Psycho says:

    I would like to know where this guy has the Brian, I think it is in a jar pickled in alcohol in their bedroom. Still the spelling mistakes Bobby should be getting the IP addresses as you do know that sending offensive emails is a federal offense. The FBI would be quite happy to give this person a good spanking or his Mommy could do it for him.

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