You guys are infinitely more intelligent and all-knowing than God. So I guess I don’t need to tell you that materialism and Marxism/communism go hand in hand.And since you got this all figured out I wont bother to tell you that the adherents of materialism Lenin, Stalin, Mao and the Cama Rouge have killed more than 150 million people.
I don’t need to tell you that your intelligent philosophy led China to the world’s most devastating famine ever recorded. There is no need to inform you of the heartless Cama Rouge (materialists who though people were no more than animals) who annihilated scores and scored of Cambodians by choking them to death with plastic bags, because bullets were to precious.
I’m sure you are aware that although materialist seeks to eliminate God the adverse effect becomes the materialist philosophers being worshipped by their followers.
Think this is a stupid remark? Well look at Mao, the Chinese worshipped him as a “super human”. Lenin was revered as such a great fella we can still see his preserved body on display in Russia.
You doubtless know that your philosophy led Stalin to install a very intelligent Materialist Scientist as the head of the Russian Ag. Committee.
This intelligent man postulated that crop production could be increased if the fundamental concepts of evolution were employed in farming techniques.
He postulated this: Russias severe cold hinders crop production. However if there were a way to produce a hearty breed of wheat adapted to the Russian climate crop production could be increased.
He concluded that if a seed of wheat were immersed in cold water for duration of time it would “evolve” and adapt to cold temps. After the seeds cold water bath it could then be planted and would yield in abundance.
You doubtless know when Stalin implemented this new farming technique it miserably failed and a famine ensued.
I’m sure you know that you’re intelligent philosophy lead Mao Zedong to destroy families throughout China. I’m sure you know that he convinced children to reject the idea of a “family unit” and to cling to communism as a parental figure.
I’m sure that you know China will kill anyone whose ideals deviating outside its materialistic principals. I’m sure you know China destroys free thinking people like all ya’ll kids. I’m sure you know that those who lived in China during Mao’s reign, or in Russia during Stalin’s or Lenin’s reign were tossed into death camps or shot in the head for not supporting their regime and its tyrannical principals.
I guess you know that your wonderful philosophy if carried out would enslave mankind and turn them into animals. But maybe you don’t mind eating human flesh during a mass famine because your materialistic leader has devastated your economy in order to reform his countries citizens.
Perhaps you don’t mind losing your children, mother and father to assassination. Maybe you don’t mind everything you own being confiscated by the Govt and then being forced to work on a farm or infrastructure project till you die a miserable death.
Although some of your science may be right the application of your philosophy (if carried out on a global level) would destroy mankind.
Yup, you guys got it figured out.
Im gonna go eat spaghetti and thank God for the wheat and tomatoes He created to make such a delicous dish…. I guess that makes the spaghettis monster a “demi-god” cuz he came from wheat and tomatoes. Plus he had to be processed in a chef boyarde factory.
Hmm… So because he is proceesed does that make the factory that made him a superior being? Perhaps because the workers in the factory ran the spaghetti making eqpt to procees him then he is actually even inferior to mankind. I guess it follows your worshipping something inferior to yourself.
What if youy eat the spaghetti monster… Do you worship him after he has been passed into the bowl?I guess it follows you would be worshipping your own night soil?
Yeah you guys got it figured out… You worship your own excrement…
-Johnathon
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
You shouldn’t speak of that which you don’t understand, for it portrays you as stupid. Our, or at least my, underlying philosophy and reason for supporting the Church of the FSM is simply truth which is provable past any reasonable doubt, not Materialism or, according to you, therefore, Marxism. Atheism and Agnosticism, do not go hand in hand with materialism. Nor, therefore, does the lack of a blind faith in the existence of (a) god(s) hallmark a lack of ethics and spirituality. Ethics, obviously, do not need a god to manifest in a person and often the belief in god allows a person to more easily ignore their ethics. Spirituality can come in a plethora of forms, many of which do not rely on the existence of a god or gods.
wow
i didnt believe my tutor when he was tellin me about this
i actually think its quite funny the way u guys are makin fun of the dumb law out there about teaching religon in school
and somebody above me wrote that Christianity is accurate
how can something be accurate if its written with the view of the winners of history
another thing is that Christianity is not one religon but many religons puttogether
Chirstianity is based on the worship of the sun (the egyptians) and the whole thing about the three wise men and the gifts that they brought (gold, frankincense and myrrh) but those were the exact same gifts that the baby krishna(hindu) was brought when he was born
another thing is if u really are devout christians or whatever you practice shouldnt u practice tolerance
As if we needed more proof of the corrosive and decisive nature of religion. Guess what we get it. Barrack Obama’s preacher has a DVD of himself saying ‘god damn America”. With Hagee spreading interdenominational hatred it’s looking more and more like Voltaine was right when he said that there would be no peace on earth until the “last king was strangled with the entrails of the last priest.” With a slightly more expansive definition of “king” and “priest” we can see that aphorism holds just as true today as it did in Eighteenth Century Europe.
In short religion is bad for you, period.
My god, Johnathon’s right! I’m starting to hate my family and am now referring to my friends as comrade! And you wouldn’t beleive it, the crops are dying in the field. Repent ye sinners, the time of reckoning is nigh!!! Oh hang on, that was just some bad acid Johnathon sold me.
Belief is powerful, but coupled with idocy, it can permanently cripple someone’s mind…at least it looks that way…
In most communist countries there were mass killings/starvation at many points in their history before communism ever came.
In Russia you have Ivan the Terrible who even killed his family members, and Peter who build St. Petersburg, a city that is said to have been built on dead russian bones because of how many died building it.
In china you would be amazed at how many died to build the great wall, and how many died from starvations
In these countries there were many deaths before communism came, we could debate that its almost part of their culture to kill thousands of their own. Unfortunatly communism never reached a country where there was no history of mass killings so we can’t tell if mass killing really is due to communism, but based on what we do know we can tell that communist countries that killed many had done so for centuries, or even millenia, before they became communist. Maybe communism didn’t make them kill thousands, maybe it was the other way around: mass killing in their culture was part of the reason why they took communism so eagerly
Hey, I know what we need!!! We need someone to have a near death experience and see the Flying Spaghetti monster before going to a heaven that has a beer volcano and a stripper factory!!! It would be all the proof we need!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ZOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Way to make sense, Johnathan.
Skepticism doesn’t lead to communism. Also, take a look at religion’s crimes before accusing us of them.
A quick word of advice: when you use logic, people take you seriously. Otherwise you’re clumped together with the rest of the right-wing nut-jobs.
Peace
did this guy sit down with a thesaurus and just blast out nonsense?
Communism has nothing to do with Capitalism… it’s the EXACT OPPOSITE… this guy is such a Moron that this post doesn’t warrant much more of a reply than he talks like he is trying to have a brain, and is using words he doesn’t understand AT ALL… the whole point of communism was to eliminate capitalism and greed.
The whole communist proving evolution doesn’t work by freezing seeds thing is the most absurd thing I have ever heard in my life… I just don’t know how to explain how many things are wrong with that.. haha…
Anyway, this guy is such a moron, I don’t want to really type a lengthy reply to this.. but I am curious what anything he said at all in any way has anything to do with anything even remotely related to FSM. That was the most confusing part of all of this.
We preach tolerance through the use of satire, not through coercion and violence. Before you criticize our beliefs, make sense.
“What if youy eat the spaghetti monster… Do you worship him after he has been passed into the bowl?I guess it follows you would be worshipping your own night soil?
Yeah you guys got it figured out… You worship your own excrement…”
Hahaha, do you know what you just described? Communion, that’s what! I’m sure you know who invented that.
Oh and unless you have something intelligent to say (comparing us to Stalin and Mao doesn’t qualify as intelligent), don’t use that cynical tone. I’m sure you know that it makes you sound like a dipshit. It’s also frighteningly boring to read.
It’s better to remain quiet and have people think you’re stupid than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
RAmen
well at least some of them are somewhat intelligent and i respect him for that… but if u want to keep the attenetion of alot of us get to the point and dont make it so damn long lol
About us eating our own god…Don’t you guys think and wine is Jesus’ blood?
Haha, materialism? Sometimes I wonder if Catholics forget where it is their leader lives.
Wow…you really missed the mark on this one Jonathan. I am not even sure you on are the right website to be honest.
spaghetti monster took my retarded wife and made her well again
now i can finaly spek with my wife
if it wasent for spaghetti monster my wife would still be retarded
The argument, when simplified: skepticism=materialism=Communism. Therefore, Pastafarians are Commies. So, if Pastafarians keep (not sure what it is we do, exactly, but something) then… our government will become Communist! And since Chairman Mao, Lenin, and Stalin were Communists, our government will… kill us and our families?
In addition to misrepresenting Communism and assuming that all Communist governments are the same, and exaggerating the problems of Stalin, Lenin, and Mao, and seeming to take a stab at evolution but not understanding how it works, I’d like to point out that Jesus was a Communist. His disciples shared money and gave to the poor in accordance to their need. Does this mean Christians, if they keep practicing their religion, will turn the government into a Communist society?
Hi!
> Marxism/communism go hand in hand.
Politic is not science. Being materialist is to trust things that can be proven, and to reconsider it when new evidence happens.
Being communism is having faith in communism. This political just replace god by leaders.
People that belive in materialism cannot be the communists you’re describing because if a leader say them you will have food and freedom and give them prisons and war, because they are materialist they will not follow this guy, and because they are free thinkers, they may say that farming is better than building bullets.
> And since you got this all figured out I wont bother to tell you that the adherents of materialism Lenin, Stalin, Mao and the Cama Rouge have killed more than 150 million people.
Have you ever heard if II word war, Hitler was a catholic.
Have you ever heard of Irack war, Bush is a catholic.
Have you ever heard of your own country history, who killed more than 7 to 12 millions of Indians? Catholic.
Have you ever heard of slavery, who sad that blacks do not have soul?
If people were materialist they just said
- “a dead men is a dead men”
- “killing is not building”
- “war kills”
- “slavery kills”
and do not do such things, moreover they do not pronounce name of god to justify genocides. Being able to see eye open the consequences of such horrible thing is materialism, and the more free thinker there will be, the less people will be indoctrinate to kill each others.
> I don’t need to tell you that your intelligent philosophy led China to the world’s most devastating famine ever recorded.
Are Chinies parafarians? I’ve never herad so.
> There is no need to inform you of the heartless Cama Rouge …
There is no need to speak about inquisition?
There is no need to speak about cruisades?
There is no need to speak about religious wars?
> I’m sure you are aware that although materialist seeks to eliminate God the adverse effect becomes the materialist philosophers being worshipped by their followers.
Materialists do not want to eliminate god.
Materialist says that the do not know if there is or not a god, and therefore they do not invoke Him to commit atrocities, or good. They try to be good because they can see the consequences of their act, and try to act well because they cannot hide themselves behind any authority.
Maybe you confuse materialism which is believing what is, with material possession and selfishness. If you do so you just may see statistics : people that believe in god do not have less things that peoples that do not. The difference is : a materialist says : I earn it, a believer says : god gives me this.
> Think this is a stupid remark?
Yes.
> Well look at Mao, the Chinese worshipped him as a “super human”. Lenin was revered as such a great fella we can still see his preserved body on display in Russia.
Yer, that is beliefs, ideology, propaganda, that what materialism fight.
See reality not what your taught, and do not believe, and therefore you will never follow such politic stuff.
> You doubtless know that your philosophy led Stalin to install a very intelligent Materialist Scientist as the head of the Russian Ag. Committee.
I do not think that Stalin is a scientist, maybe you’ve fallen in one of his propaganda trap. If you were more materialistic, you will have noticed this point.
> This intelligent man postulated that crop production could be increased if the fundamental concepts of evolution were employed in farming techniques.
That is tru, have you ever heard of selection? You know taking the good seed to plant and the bad to eat, that the method used to do plants that resist to illnesses, to increase crop productivity, to get better plants. But it’s not Staline that says that it is a direct concrete and observable consequence of Darwin theory.
> He postulated this: Russias severe cold hinders crop production. However if there were a way to produce a hearty breed of wheat adapted to the Russian climate crop production could be increased.
He concluded that if a seed of wheat were immersed in cold water for duration of time it would “evolve” and adapt to cold temps. After the seeds cold water bath it could then be planted and would yield in abundance.
This postulate is Wrong, evolution do not happens spontaneity , it happens with selection. He proposes a wrong hypothesis and obtained a wrong conclusion. A materialist would have said:
- I SUPPOSE that cold water MAY improve seed resistance, I’ve put seeds in water and I’ve planted them in a fridge. After that I’ve seen that the seeds died, therefore cold water is a bad idea. Naw I believe that cold water do not increase seeds resistance and I can prove it.
Maybe the materialist will used after that Darwin theory and select plant from a generation to an other, and then see that crop quality can relay be improved, that is the way seeds are actually improved with a 1% productivity benefit a year for wheat, that materialism.
> You doubtless know when Stalin implemented this new farming technique it miserably failed and a famine ensued.
And do you think that with any God theory you can stops famine. Because if you can explain me haw god can improve crop science, I’ll very pleased to test and apply your new God’s inspired methods.
> I’m sure you know that you’re intelligent philosophy lead Mao Zedong to destroy families throughout China.
I’m not sure that Mao killed people in name of the FSM, but if you get proof of that, I’ll reconsider the question.
> I’m sure you know that he convinced children to reject the idea of a “family unit” and to cling to communism as a parental figure.
I’m aware of Mao ideology but I do not see the connexion between Communism Atrocity an an innocent powerful monster of pasta, but if He reveals to you the answer of this question, please tell me.
> I’m sure that you know China will kill anyone whose ideals deviating outside its materialistic principals. I’m sure you know China destroys free thinking people like all ya’ll kids. I’m sure you know that those who lived in China during Mao’s reign, or in Russia during Stalin’s or Lenin’s reign were tossed into death camps or shot in the head for not supporting their regime and its tyrannical principals.
Yes I know, if Chinese were materialist instead of believing in communism they would not commit such things.
We agree on one things catastrophy need believes, they can be communism, they can be god, they can be leaders or other things but they cannot be materialism.
> I guess you know that your wonderful philosophy if carried out would enslave mankind and turn them into animals.
Materialism has the aim to produce free thinkers. Believe what you see, not what you’re taught. It is that to be free.
I think that you must study history of slavery a little bit more, you will see that in each case men were slave, a idological belive that cannot be proven was given, sometime it was a religious one (blacks do not have souls) sometime not (war prisoners mus pay), but it was a belief. Materialism is fighting again this things, and you know it, you’re opposing materialist materialistic arguments.
> But maybe you don’t mind eating human flesh during a mass famine because your materialistic leader has devastated your economy in order to reform his countries citizens.
I do not like manipulation at all, naw you’re producing crying propaganda. We do not say that, there is no connexion with us, and saying that it as absurd as saying that God wants me to wear a pink cap and eat banana peals.
> Perhaps you don’t mind losing your children, mother and father to assassination. Maybe you don’t mind everything you own being confiscated by the Govt and then being forced to work on a farm or infrastructure project till you die a miserable death.
Of course I do not. I neither want that the Government teach my children stupidities, neither I want that my government burs books (auto de fe) and do wrong propaganda not proven by facts.
I also want that my government respects beliefs, and allow people to be free to trust what they wan. I believe that the word is created in one day by a FSM, some believe that the world is a consequence of some physical stuff, some are materialists, some are Catholics, some are Jews, Muslim some believe in the invisible pink unicorn and some just do not believe. I just want them to be able to get proven information based on observable evidence, then believe is a personal fact, that do not need religious trust or propaganda, and I respect either all the beliefs, if they are honestly considered as beliefs and not as universal trust.
> Although some of your science may be right the application of your philosophy (if carried out on a global level) would destroy mankind.
Do you belive that sicence will destroy mindkind?
If science can produce power plants, it’s ideology that says we must use it to do atomic bomb, not science. This only error science do is to give means and powers to believers to act wrong.
But I think you’re diong provovation, if you think science is evil, a belief I do sincerely respect, you shall not use internet, you must leave in a forest, you must return to neandertal age, and of course you must forget religion, because religion appears after society, therefore after science.
Yup, you guys got it figured out.
> Im gonna go eat spaghetti and thank God for the wheat and tomatoes He created to make such a delicous dish…. I guess that makes the spaghettis monster a “demi-god” cuz he came from wheat and tomatoes. Plus he had to be processed in a chef boyarde factory.
I’m not sure that God can create tomatoes without the hand of a gardener, that’s materialism. Maybe you should cure famine with pure god made tomatoes, doing again the Stalin error you’ve talked about: believing a false theory.
> Hmm… So because he is proceesed does that make the factory that made him a superior being? Perhaps because the workers in the factory ran the spaghetti making eqpt to procees him then he is actually even inferior to mankind. I guess it follows your worshipping something inferior to yourself.
You do not understand our religion, but I’ll explain you.
In your religion you have symbols like crosses and holly water that are a part of the word business. This symbols are hand made by factory and Taiwanese children. Then a Priest comes and sacred them, then you believe in them and they are holly objects of your cult.
Our pasta are made in a factory by workers, but when they go in the hand of a pastafrian, who has the same power for us as you priest it become A Sacred Representation Of Him, like the plastic crosses become a Holly Representation of Jesus Christ. Then we can do our cult which is eating pasta.
But maybe because you’re not a pastafarian you just eat normal pasta and the FSM do not want to reveal Himself to you, like your God didn’t reveal himself to me.
> What if youy eat the spaghetti monster… Do you worship him after he has been passed into the bowl?
You do eat Christ Body, we’re not cannibals, we’re civilised believer that do not eat human flesh even if it is symbolic.
> I guess it follows you would be worshipping your own night soil?
> Yeah you guys got it figured out… You worship your own excrement…
I hope that you’re enough materialistic to distinguish pasta from shit, therefore I’ll pray for you that you will not die of stomach illnesses.
>-Johnathon
Paul.
“You guys are infinitely more intelligent and all-knowing than God. So I guess I don’t need to tell you that materialism and Marxism/communism go hand in hand.”
Why, thank you. And no, materialism goes hand in hand with capitalism. The idea of Marxist communism has never been put into practice, the only things that have been put into practice are totalitarian dictators who used communism to further themselves. I’m sorry, but you are completely wrong here, the most materialistic countries in this world (ie the one I live in, the US) are capitalistic.
“And since you got this all figured out I wont bother to tell you that the adherents of materialism Lenin, Stalin, Mao and the Cama Rouge have killed more than 150 million people.”
Really, I have no idea what this had to do with FSM. But yes, and I’m sure that the crusades didn’t result in the death of anyone, that the inquistition was just a cover-up for candy salesman, that the religious wars that have destroyed Europe were just cover-ups for religious festivals. People kill people, acting like these people are unique is naive and foolish.
“I don’t need to tell you that your intelligent philosophy led China to the world’s most devastating famine ever recorded. There is no need to inform you of the heartless Cama Rouge (materialists who though people were no more than animals) who annihilated scores and scored of Cambodians by choking them to death with plastic bags, because bullets were to precious.”
How were they materialists? At least by using the plastic bags they showed environmentalism. Again, not sure how you are connecting the two.
“I’m sure you are aware that although materialist seeks to eliminate God the adverse effect becomes the materialist philosophers being worshipped by their followers.”
Materialism has nothing to do with eliminating God, and every thing to do with (surprise) materials. It is making your major pursuits physical material gains. And yes, I’m sure religious figures aren’t held up as “Saints” worthy or worship, or turned into icons that we hold in a near divine status.
“Think this is a stupid remark? Well look at Mao, the Chinese worshipped him as a “super human”. Lenin was revered as such a great fella we can still see his preserved body on display in Russia.”
Lenin freed Russians from the oppresive rule of the Czars, if he was so horrible then why do the Russians still regard him as one of their greatest leaders? Mao brought stability and power to the Chinese after World War II, where they had been weak since the fall of the Qing dynasty. I mean, this never happened before. The Catholics don’t worship their leaders, the Romans, Egyptians, and other civilizations didn’t claim their leaders were divine. This is a obvious tactic employed by any totalitarian leader, to turn themselves into divinity, because as Napolean said, “Religion is a great tool for controlling the masses.”
“You doubtless know that your philosophy led Stalin to install a very intelligent Materialist Scientist as the head of the Russian Ag. Committee.
This intelligent man postulated that crop production could be increased if the fundamental concepts of evolution were employed in farming techniques.
He postulated this: Russias severe cold hinders crop production. However if there were a way to produce a hearty breed of wheat adapted to the Russian climate crop production could be increased.
He concluded that if a seed of wheat were immersed in cold water for duration of time it would “evolve” and adapt to cold temps. After the seeds cold water bath it could then be planted and would yield in abundance.
You doubtless know when Stalin implemented this new farming technique it miserably failed and a famine ensued.”
This is not evolution, this is stupidity. Any idea falsely followed cannot have the blame placed upon it. They misinterpreted the ideas, and foolishly suffered. I mean, you are right, famines ONLY happen in Communist societies, not in America, not in Africa, not in Europe. I mean that would be quite silly.
“I’m sure you know that you’re intelligent philosophy lead Mao Zedong to destroy families throughout China. I’m sure you know that he convinced children to reject the idea of a “family unit” and to cling to communism as a parental figure.
I’m sure that you know China will kill anyone whose ideals deviating outside its materialistic principals. I’m sure you know China destroys free thinking people like all ya’ll kids. I’m sure you know that those who lived in China during Mao’s reign, or in Russia during Stalin’s or Lenin’s reign were tossed into death camps or shot in the head for not supporting their regime and its tyrannical principals.”
Welcome to totalitarianism. I’m sure the Inquisition didn’t kill people who disagreed with the Church, I’m sure we don’t turn those who disagree with us into criminals. I’m sure that nobody has ever, ever, ever been killed for political reasons, or for disagreeing with their government.
“I guess you know that your wonderful philosophy if carried out would enslave mankind and turn them into animals. But maybe you don’t mind eating human flesh during a mass famine because your materialistic leader has devastated your economy in order to reform his countries citizens.”
Where are you equating evolution with materialism? I really don’t understand how they are even related. The ideas of evolution simply state how life changes over time to adapt better to it’s surrounding to continue the species. Materialism is a pre-evolution idea, refer to Hedonism, Sodom and Gomorah, the Books you worship. Social Darwinism has nothing to do with what we are doing here, and Darwin merely had his name slapped upon it, he neither condoned or is responsible for it. It is merely a term used to give scientific basis for the upper class to abuse the poor. Stop being naive.
“Perhaps you don’t mind losing your children, mother and father to assassination. Maybe you don’t mind everything you own being confiscated by the Govt and then being forced to work on a farm or infrastructure project till you die a miserable death.”
Again, social Darwinism has nothing to do with us. Stop being a ignorant fool. We do not believe that you should have a society ruled by the ideas attributed to social darwinism. We state that science should be taught in science class, and that forcing your ideas upon others is an injustice we will not suffer.
“Although some of your science may be right the application of your philosophy (if carried out on a global level) would destroy mankind.”
Well, we seem to be doing fine.
“Yup, you guys got it figured out.
Im gonna go eat spaghetti and thank God for the wheat and tomatoes He created to make such a delicous dish…. I guess that makes the spaghettis monster a “demi-god” cuz he came from wheat and tomatoes. Plus he had to be processed in a chef boyarde factory.”
Yes we do. Hopefully God didn’t make you allergic to wheat glutton.
“Hmm… So because he is proceesed does that make the factory that made him a superior being? Perhaps because the workers in the factory ran the spaghetti making eqpt to procees him then he is actually even inferior to mankind. I guess it follows your worshipping something inferior to yourself.”
Well, me worshiping another human really comes across as that. Christians worship a cross, how is this different? You worship wood, we worship food. In fact, what is that idea, where you eat the blood and body of christ? Yeah, that makes food divine too. How ironic.
“What if youy eat the spaghetti monster… Do you worship him after he has been passed into the bowl?I guess it follows you would be worshipping your own night soil?”
Yeah you guys got it figured out… You worship your own excrement…”
Well, that is a stretch. After eating the blood and body of your Christ, do you then eat your own excrement? Do you thank God for the food he gave you, and then curse him for what comes out after words. That sounds like hypocrisy. We worship the gifts our god has given us, and you worship yours.
“-Johnathon”
That’s a really, really, fucked up stupid way to spell a name.