for a preschooler you have an avid imaginagtion , but thats OK many before you have chosen to BELIEVE , that the whole enschelada resulted when water hit some rock in outer space and happened to be hit by lightening …..the result was a chain reaction which brought the present mess of drugs , sex and violence to be an everyday happening .
five kids in a BMV at John Travolta`s gated village in Florida tried to test this concept on Jan 26/`08 and were restored to the original rock and water ..the enery was absorbed by a large tree that got into their path and was destroyed , much to the chagrin of John !
If you find this story farfetched , it`s OK to BELIEVE in the FSM or the EVOLUTOIONARY model of your source in the scheme of mother earth ..whovever she is ! I don`t think any one will mind ! Why should anyone be upset by your amusing proposals..they are good for a laugh !
George
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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You are absolutely right in that it’s OK to believe in FSMism. Not as sure I agree with you on the evolutionary thing, but, hey, what ever sauces your noodles, man.
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… aside from the ghastly slaughtering of “enchilada,” did that make sense to anyone else?
‘Cause I’m sure lost. Why are we talking about John Travolta?
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WE don’t indoctrinate OUR preschoolers, thank you very much.
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I didn’t really understand any of this.. John Travolta… Water and rock… sex, drugs, violence. I think that English must not be George’s first language, maybe it would have made more sense in his native tongue. Either way, I’m just pissed that he misspelled “Enchilada”. As far as I’m concerned the deliciousness of Mexican food is surpassed only by that of pasta. George has insulted a mighty ally of the FSM by misspelling that word.
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Dear George: It is obvious immediately that you are a preschooler, as your post title indicates. You might want to check how “enchilada” is spelled next time.
Ramen
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The way you phrase the rise of life on Earth makes me think you don’t quite understand the process as it happened, or even close to how it happened. And your spelling of enchilada suggests you don’t understand most of anything. In fact, your whole argument sounds something like this:
Ms. Garrison: In the beginning, we were all fish. Okay? Swimming around in the water. And then one day a couple of fish had a retard baby, and the retard baby was different, so it got to live. So Retard Fish goes on to make more retard babies, and then one day, a retard baby fish crawled out of the ocean with its…
[she waves her left hand limply]
Ms. Garrison: …mutant fish hands… and it had butt sex with a squirrel or something and made this.
[she points to a prehistoric mammal rodent]
Ms. Garrison: Retard frog-sqirrel, and then *that* had a retard baby which was a… monkey-fish-frog… And then this monkey-fish-frog had butt sex with that monkey, and that monkey had a mutant retard baby that screwed another monkey… and that made you!
[she faces the class, with the new girl among them looking around]
Ms. Garrison: So there you go! You’re the retarded offspring of five monkeys having butt sex with a fish-squirrel! Congratulations!
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It takes a mighty stubborn man to look at the cumulation and self-supporting evidence from biology, archeology, geology, chemistry, astrophysics and so on and say, “Bah! I know better!”
.
(Originally posted 11:35 28 Feb 2008. I’m sure a mod will let this go up sometime in 2010.)
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Um, What?
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I don’t know what you are saying, or why.
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Hey, just like A MAGIC MAN DID IT. So it all works out.
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Does this mean Travolta has reached OT-8?
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“the whole enschelada resulted when water hit some rock in outer space and happened to be hit by lightening …..the result was a chain reaction which brought the present mess of drugs , sex and violence to be an everyday happening .”
Wow this is the most clear and obvious explanation for the beginning of the universe since Kent Hovind.
Of course the fact that this is utter crap seems a minor matter as compared to your obviously flawed idea of the creation of the Earth.
George, George, George, capitalize, it’s good for you. Run a spell check, read a few books. Then come back and try an actual debate. We’ll be waiting.
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Ok, let’s start this:
“for a preschooler you have an avid imaginagtion ,”
At this point I knew something had gone horribly, horribly wrong.
Our FSM, disgraced! *Gasp* How original!
” but thats OK many before you have chosen to BELIEVE , that the whole enschelada resulted when water hit some rock in outer space and happened to be hit by lightening …..the result was a chain reaction which brought the present mess of drugs , sex and violence to be an everyday happening .”
Well, this is a clear misunderstanding of the Big Bang, Abiogenesis AND Evolution, in one phrase. Impressing.
“five kids in a BMV at John Travolta`s gated village in Florida tried to test this concept on Jan 26/`08 and were restored to the original rock and water ..the enery was absorbed by a large tree that got into their path and was destroyed , much to the chagrin of John !”
Huh? Are you saying there were trees in the primordial soup?
“If you find this story farfetched , it`s OK to BELIEVE in the FSM or the EVOLUTOIONARY model of your source in the scheme of mother earth ..whovever she is ! I don`t think any one will mind ! Why should anyone be upset by your amusing proposals..they are good for a laugh !”
And so are you.
“George”
Earl, and a hearty RAmen to you too.
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for a preschooler you are quite good at spelling (imaginagtion?)
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I believe the appropriate response here is WTF?! Seriously, does anyone know what this clown is actually talking about?
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Its too bad for you the “enschelada” of rock, water and lightning (which doesn’t occur in outer space) didn’t include either a spell check or rudimentary grammar lessons. I find it far fetched that a “cough” grown man has no knowledge of either physics and seems to think that chemical reactions are less realistic then AN INVISIBLE FUCKING DUDE THAT MADE EVERYTHING FROM SCRATCH IN 6 DAYS. May you be touched by the FSM’s noodly appendages and perhaps the long arm of an education system.
RAmen
Honest Sill
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That was well thought out and reasoned, George. I’d love to know what you smoke.
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And what year of preschool are you in, George? I’m guessing pretty early preschool because not a word of what you wrote it intelligible.
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So wait… Are you saying John Travolta is God? Does he rinse? He’s not one of those baked ziti heretics is he?
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Since I have gotten carpel tunnel from responding to creationist propaganda and misinformation, which I have always disproven, I won’t bother much with yours. So just look at the comments on other articles and see how evolution absolutely destroyes creationism in terms of logic and observable evidence.
Ouch, my hands still hurt from carpel tunnel
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George,
Your theory is interesting. I would, however, recommend a spell check.
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OMG- Is this guy ok? I’m worried for him.
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Thank you. You apperently have a sence of humor unlike some Christians who seem to want to spam everything on this site.
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…May His Noodly Appendage grant you the skills of coherency.
RAmen.
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Hi Retard!
It’s good to know that there are still god fear christians out there. As you have probably realized, the pastafarian is more legitimate than most other modern religions out there. I’m guessing that your in the middle of butt fuck no where with a horrible education. You an odd person following a fairy-tale written 500-300 years after it allegedly happened. And then you impose your gay hating, racist, anti-feminist, civil rights destroying deity upon the objective public community which is protected from you by the establishment clause, and you go ahead create sudo science which is imposed on students such as myself while your busy taking a piss on the constitution and the bill of rights you asshole! Just remember that it’s okay to follow your religion but to impose your religion on other just like most of the religious right is just fucked up. Also why do you care? According to you we’ll all die in the “second coming” so why should you give a shit?
Suck my balls intolerant ass-fuck,
JTS
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Hi retard,
I’m guessing that your a member of the religious right, and therefore your a real asshole. And if you follow intelligent design in the belief that it is science, take and hour of your time and go to this NOVA presentation of go to defconamerica.org it’s always the smart thing to do is to research your opposition right? So as a possible member of a religious right you assert your authority over the people’s constitutional rights, correct? So you by pass the establishment clause of the constitution and you impose your gay hating, anti-feminist, illiberal (18 century liberalism), you intervine in people’s privacy such as the schiavo case and your anit abortion views, as well as your stand against progress with trying to ban stem cell reaserch and you teach sudo science or creationism or intelligent design in public schools, making people dummer, and breaching the establishment clause of the constitution and violating MY rights as a student, while using that document as toilet paper. You are an asshole.
Suck my balls,
JTS
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Hi retard,
I’m guessing that your a member of the religious right, and therefore your a real asshole. And if you follow intelligent design in the belief that it is science, take and hour of your time and go to this NOVA presentation of go to defconamerica.org it’s always the smart thing to do is to research your opposition right? So as a possible member of a religious right you assert your authority over the people’s constitutional rights, correct? So you by pass the establishment clause of the constitution and you impose your gay hating, anti-feminist, illiberal (18 century liberalism), you intervine in people’s privacy such as the schiavo case and your anit abortion views, as well as your stand against progress with trying to ban stem cell reaserch and you teach sudo science or creationism or intelligent design in public schools, making people dummer, and breaching the establishment clause of the constitution and violating MY rights as a student, while using that document as toilet paper. You are an asshole.
Suck my balls,
J.T.S.
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Well, given that the Word’s “Parody religion” are scattered throughout the site, as well as on the Gospel of the Spaghetti monster, I’d assume that it was meant for a laugh(and to make a point which seems juuuust out of your grasp). And try as you might, you CANNOT convince me that John Travolta is human and not some form of Godly (or Noodly) form of vengeance on our race.
P.S. What is “enery”?
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what is an “enschelada”? Is this George as in George W. Bush, the grammar and spelling would certainly indicate so. What is with all the spaces between punctuation? I am not sure what the “EVOLUTOIONARY” model is, but I would love to find out. Enlighten us.
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??? Is this guy insulting us or praising us or spreading his own faith of mother nature? I’m really confused. (First Post, woohoo!)
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Henderob, you do nothing but leave nonsensical and unintelligent comments on this website every single chance that you get, and I have to say I am getting very tired of your different methods of convincing us that we are wrong. I believe the first time you tried cursing us into acceptance, basically proving to us that you are not a terribly smart person. The second time you got angry with us in a very pompous and pedantic manner, acting somewhat condescendingly like you were the bearer of some secret that you were deciding to share with us. Now, you have tried to change our views by choosing to accept that we may have our own childish and foolish beliefs, and that this is our choice, while at the same time suggesting that you are above such silly and immature ideologies. None of the three methods have worked so far, and I think that it would be in your best interests to just quit because every time you come up with a logical point, all of the Pastafarians that visit this site basically annihilate your post and tear you to shreds.
Here:
You are not smart, clever, or in any way mature. You are just a ridiculous Christian seeking to force your ideas on others, just like every other one of your people. I am sick of it. Do not post here again. Do not every talk to another Pastafarian. Leave us alone, wallow in your lack of self worth, and please find something constructive to do with your life, because I am now completely finished with you infecting others with your idiocy. Please, I may sound terribly cruel in this post, but let me assure you that, really, not one person on this website wants to hear anything you have to say. At all. In any way. Ever.
Really, please just remove this website from your bookmarks and history, reinstall whatever browser you use, buy a totally new computer, and suffer damage to your head. Do whatever it takes to make sure you are never inclined to post on this website again.
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I believe the 11th commandments is; “Thou shalt not satirize.”
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I believe the 11th commandment is; “Thou shall not satirize.”
I think it only applies to Christians.
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Ummm….
What?
(I THINK the FSM was just insulted, but honestly, this guy’s writing style is so weird I’m not quite sure…)
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Well that prettymuch says it all huh? How could anyone possibly disagree with George? He clearly knows what he’s talking about. You can tell by the way he knows how to spell big words such as Enchilada, Lightning, and Evolutionary. Also, his repeated use of exclamation marks during his ramblings… I mean, well thought out points is effective in getting his point across. Thank you George, for shedding light on all of these uneducated idiots who believe in FSM
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I recommend that before you attempt to comment on Evolution that you try reading “A Selfish Gene” or “The Blind Watchmaker” by Richard Dawkins. Both are intended for a public understanding of what Evolution really is, rather than what you think that you think it is (based on your mis-education on the subject by your religious leaders who fear what will happen to their power when the average American chooses to education himself or herself rather than blindly believe in whatever they are told).
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Well, I’d say the fact that the words “parody religion” are sprinkled throughout the site, maybe it’s meant for a laugh, as well as to prove a point that’s juuust out of your reach. By the way, the radioactive energy surrounding John Travolta can cause various cancers, and, for some reason, give you the flu, but as for rock and water, you were probably deluded by the radiation. No worries, it’ll go away.
P.S. What is “enery”?
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What is this “enschelada” you speak of?
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Our beliefs are good for a laugh?…
BUHAHAHAHA! Hey, you’re right! That’s probably because the FSM is a JOKE! (or is He?…)
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Woah…what the fuck are you talking about. Did I miss something. Did I jump into a conversation that had been already going on? Could you please have an introduction, explain what the fuck you are talking about, and a conlusion?
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@Dan
Dan – “henderob” is our beloved prophet Bobby, who posts the rantings of others for our amusement. His name appears because he is our moderator. Please look at the bottom of the hate mail for the actual signatures of the perpetrators. Please don’t blame our prophet for their foolishness.
.
RAmen
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@Dan, top of page 5
Uh…Henderbob is the person who made this website. He posts Hate-mails sent to him. In fact, Henderbob rarely posts his opinions in this hate-mail section….
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@Dan
Mar 1st, 2008 at 10:11 am
Henderob is bobby henderson, prophet of the FSM. He receives all the hatemail, and then puts it on his website here
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Dan, dearest, Henderob is our dearest Bobby Henderson.
he is just posting them for our enjoyment.
George,
now that is the fiend who sent us this message from beyond the strange.
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Hatemail makes me smile; it proves you are doing something right when someone hates you for doing it.
RAmen
James
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@James D King of Pirates
That’s probably the truest thing I’ve heard all day, I’ve never thought of it like that. Thank you sir.
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Buhahahaha. Hahaha. Ha. Yes, they ARE good for a laugh. Because they are a clever little thing called a J-O-K-E. Incedentally, hands up who believes in Mother Earth? Didn’t think so.
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Note to self. Stop double posting >
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w00t w00t go prophet!!!
stone the evil hate-mailing peeps!
RAmen!!
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“Dan
Henderob, you do nothing but leave nonsensical and unintelligent comments on this website every single chance that you get, and I have to say I am getting very tired of your different methods of convincing us that we are wrong. I believe the first time you tried cursing us into acceptance, basically proving to us that you are not a terribly smart person. The second time you got angry with us in a very pompous and pedantic manner, acting somewhat condescendingly like you were the bearer of some secret that you were deciding to share with us. Now, you have tried to change our views by choosing to accept that we may have our own childish and foolish beliefs, and that this is our choice, while at the same time suggesting that you are above such silly and immature ideologies. None of the three methods have worked so far, and I think that it would be in your best interests to just quit because every time you come up with a logical point, all of the Pastafarians that visit this site basically annihilate your post and tear you to shreds.
Here:
You are not smart, clever, or in any way mature. You are just a ridiculous Christian seeking to force your ideas on others, just like every other one of your people. I am sick of it. Do not post here again. Do not every talk to another Pastafarian. Leave us alone, wallow in your lack of self worth, and please find something constructive to do with your life, because I am now completely finished with you infecting others with your idiocy. Please, I may sound terribly cruel in this post, but let me assure you that, really, not one person on this website wants to hear anything you have to say. At all. In any way. Ever.
Really, please just remove this website from your bookmarks and history, reinstall whatever browser you use, buy a totally new computer, and suffer damage to your head. Do whatever it takes to make sure you are never inclined to post on this website again.”
Ummmm dude henderbob is the creator of pastaferianism and is the one getting this hate mail he is the publisher cause he published it on his site
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