for a preschooler you have an avid imaginagtion , but thats OK many before you have chosen to BELIEVE , that the whole enschelada resulted when water hit some rock in outer space and happened to be hit by lightening …..the result was a chain reaction which brought the present mess of drugs , sex and violence to be an everyday happening .
five kids in a BMV at John Travolta`s gated village in Florida tried to test this concept on Jan 26/`08 and were restored to the original rock and water ..the enery was absorbed by a large tree that got into their path and was destroyed , much to the chagrin of John !
If you find this story farfetched , it`s OK to BELIEVE in the FSM or the EVOLUTOIONARY model of your source in the scheme of mother earth ..whovever she is ! I don`t think any one will mind ! Why should anyone be upset by your amusing proposals..they are good for a laugh !
George
Connect
Contribute
The Church of the FSM is always looking for content. Details here
Support the Cause
The Church is funded entirely by your purchases of FSM merchandise. Thank you for your support.
Purchase the Gospel
Purchase from
Amazon.com
Purchase from BN.com
An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
Give
Propaganda Buttons
Add these buttons to your site:
Miscellaneous
Bobby's Blog
Contact Bobby: Contact Me
That’s all well and good, Mr Bush, but you see, we have evidence.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
we do believe in the FSM!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
LOL!
Why is it that all the people who send hate mail sound very stupid doing it?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“Why should anyone be upset by your amusing proposals..they are good for a laugh !”
.
That’s a good question and it really deserves a question mark “?”. And yet, a lot of people do seem to get upset by the FSM and evolution and they send angry emails to the good prophet and tells us that we will incur the wrath of God and burn in Hell. Oh, and threaten to eat the Spaghetti Monster, noodles, balls and all! So I don’t think you’re amused by it, I think you’re threatened by it. We have a real, live, genuine prophet! Living, breathing and drinking beer! While yours are long gone and not coming back. You start to see that the model of your creation does not correspond to the real world, not by a long shot, and you start lashing out at the ones that do.
.
You’re not laughing. You’re weeping like a little baby, stomping your feet, huffing and puffing, and screaming that the world is unfair cause you’ve just wasted all your time on a book that doesn’t add up. Not even through wishful thinking.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Does your middle name start with W?
Believe in evolution? Wha-? What you have done is revealed your complete ignorance of science.
If your magical sky fairy told you 2+2=5 you would say it is, despite all evidence to the contrary. Here is the problem with your simple minded ideals:
2+2=4 NO MATTER WHERE I GO IN THE UNIVERSE.
Evolution IS NO MATTER WHERE I GO IN THE UNIVERSE.
The Theory (capital T) of Evolution is mankind’s understanding of the this SCIENTIFIC Process. Just like your bible is mankind’s understanding of a wonderful fairy world with dragons and unicorns (forgot they are in your precious bible didn’t you?) Funny thing. Science explains dinosaurs. Pastafarianism talks of pirates.
Your silly book fails to mention either.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Good call, oh obtuse one. Only pastafarians get in car wrecks now?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
wtf???
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
imaginagtion
lightening
EVOLUTOIONARY
whovever
et. al.
Who’s the preschooler?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“five kids in a BMV at John Travolta`s … were restored to the original rock and water”
So we should worship Xenu?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Sir,
If you are actually smirking over the injury or death of children, all I can say is ….no I can’t think of anything to say.
Do you think Jesus would have thought it was funny?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
P.S. It’s enchilada, you sorry excuse for a human being.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“when water hit some rock in outer space and happened to be hit by lightning”
Hey, dude, that’s STILL more realistic than a person eating a pomegranate, causing the present mess of drugs, sex, and violence we know today.
.
I also find it funny that you even think the water, rocks, and lightning came out of nowhere. In any case, several scientist conducted a professionally controlled experiment that resulted in organic chemicals, hereby giving evidence that indeed, in the circumstances you gave us leads to life as we know it. This experiment has been conducted by others with the same results.
As for the five kids in BMV, well, they weren’t all that controlled or professional, were they?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Is it too much to ask that the people who wish to insult us learn how to write in proper english syntax and grammer?
`
RAmen
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
well, thank you. i think so 2
peace love and pirates
RAmen
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
George,
.
Learn some grammar, read some books (other than the bible, please), ask some real questions about the big bang/life’s origins, and don’t equate anything having to do with John Travolta, Scientology, Floridian gated communities or drunk teens with evolutionary theory.
.
Damn straight FSM is worth a laugh…but what you’re not understanding is that it’s at your expense.
.
P.E.T.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Why do people who write hate mail have the worst grammar and spelling? My logical conjecture for this is that they are uneducated. Ramen
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Wait, was this actually hate mail, it sounded more like an amusing anecdote about John Travolta. There was very little hate actually, except maybe from John Travolta. Well to start with the FSM is not “mother earth” if anything he is close to “father firmament” so HA. Not much to say really, surprising articulate, it must not be a catholic this time. But sir we are no joke.
RAmen
James D
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Here’s an idea George….change your medication.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
New words:
enschelada
BMV
EVOLUTOIONARY
I find myself wondering how five kids were restored to rock and water – did they start out as rock and water earlier in the day?
I am continually amazed by the levels of willful ignorance displayed by some of the folks who post these hate mail entries. It makes it obvious that all they want to do is stick their head in the door, scream, and run away. FSM forbid that they should put forward any evidence, or even a moderately well-reasoned argument in support of their positions. It seems like they think that if you yell something loud enough, and frequently enough, that makes it true.
Hey, George, a few suggestions:
1. Learn to spell.
2. Learn about punctuation, capitalization, grammar and syntax.
3. Try presenting your case with evidence in support of your position, and (if appropriate) evidence that the opposing position is incorrect. (This does not include pompous or self-righteous assertions.)
If you can do these things, it is possible that you may engage in intelligent discussion of points on which you disagree with someone. If you continue atteempting to present your case as you have above, no one will expect you to be capable of intelligent discussion of anything.
I don’t expect to hear a response from young George.
Spaghetti tomorrow night!!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
So many typos! My head a-splode!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
…huh?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Dull, unimaginative, poor grammar, and what is up with the space before the exclamation points? 1/10
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Are you talking about the big bang? It’s difficult to tell cause you are so far from accurate that you probably should look it up or shut up (or both would be awesome). Also I do not know you, but just from reading this i’m fairly sure you are an extremly gullible individual; first off I could be wrong, but I’m assuming you are christian? This alone would not substantiate my argument as yes, there is a possibility we are wrong and you are right, although in my experience most believers are just gullible people who did not question what they heard in church when their parents brought em along on a sunday morning. However add that to 2 more things you have shown.
1: you think that we actualy believe the fsm theory(although granted there probably are a few who do)
2: you think when someone talks about mother earth, that they are actualy talking about a living thinking designer much the same god, when infact it’s merly an expression. Infact, how is mother earth(or indeed the flying spaghetti monster) any less likely than your god? the only real difference evidence wise as far as I have noticed is there have been less books and short stories written for them.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I would say both sides of the evolution argument have pretty good imaginations, however, our side has one thing creationists dont, “Overwhelming observable evidence”.
Oh, by the way, if that was an analogy, it was completely incoherent.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Sorry I got up to enschelada, and realized it’s pizza day in the local cafe. What where you saying?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
You find it more believable that the current “mess of drugs , sex and violence” was the product of a perfect god or intelligent designer than the product of an unintelligent designer or no designer at all? Wow, you seem to have less faith in the abilities of an intelligent designer (including the hypothetical Christian God) than we do. It must be sad to have so little faith; I hope his noodliness touches you soon. RAmen!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I can’t see what that story has to do with anything, I don’t even think I understand the story. Please elaborate
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
…uhhh…what?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I’m confused. What’s this person talking about?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
What exactly is your point in this email? Were you one of those dipshits who decided to test his gate system? Probably, since your lack of explanation tells us nothing as to what or who you are. Go away and quit bugging the hell out of us. We have important things to do than read bullshit made up by some dumbass who won’t even tell us what his point it.
~
I hate when my cable modem is out, that’s why I seem pissy right now.
~Mariner
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I don’t know if its just me being a little bit tired an inattentive, but can anyone else understand this?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
What?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
This message confuses me… can someone write a translation, please? I’m not sure what it is about, as I am not very good at deciphering chaotic script.
It IS kind of funny that he calls someone a preschooler in a post containing so many spelling and grammatical errors, but I guess I’m not here to call people out on literacy.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Pardon?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I truely can’t tell if this guy is for or against the FSM. He seems rather drunk, and I can’t tell if it’s sarcasm gone awry, or some holy roller having a flash-back from all the acid.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Those space thunderstorms are a real bummer, dude.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
OBJECTION!
There isn’t any water in space, only ice! Nor is there lightning! Your entire case is now flawed!
I like pie! Meeps!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
mwahaha, an other idiot. Jees, why did the “designer” give him brain, if this “kind” of people never use it?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
this guy gets it it is OK to believe anything as long as you do not force it upon others
you can even believe that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbbolically eat his flesh and telepathicaly tell you accept him as you master,so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Oh George. How droll! Your eloquence reveals an education. For an educated man you are remarkably obtuse. At least you must be if you can claim to BELIEVE in Biblical creation (which belief is implicit in your sarcasm) despite the overwhelming evidence against it.
.
Drew
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Whoopsie, I missed one of the new words.
lightening
Man, these god squad deputies are no end of fun.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
What.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
lol wut?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Oh man I totally should have said “More like FROM a preschooler!” but now nobody will think that it’s witty and clever because it’s lost it’s full effect through both my delayed reaction and further explanation.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Crap, now I’ve become redundant! I’ve got to save the comedic value of these posts somehow lest somebody I know discovers that I’m being unfunny on the internet!
.
I think I’ll just ignore the fact that I’m triple posting and say something random for hilarity’s sake. It’s my last chance!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
DAAAAAAAAAMN
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Some people wouldn’t recognize politically motivated satire if it bit them in the butt. George probably thinks Jonathan Swift was serious about eating plump Irish babies.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Enschelada? BMV?
Say what with the who now?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
george, you are old as dirt my friend, old as the stars, why don’t you tells us what happened when you were a teenager? did you see the big bang yourself?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Am I the only one here who is completly lost by what he is saying??
Like or Dislike:
0 
0