YOU DUMB BITCH!!! this is no such thing as a fucking flying spaghetti monster and hes not god ! If he were real i would chop that bitch up and feed him to the poor starving people in africa! you people are sick and demented, and your all going to fucking hell! FUCKING SPEGHETTI I MEAN COME ON IF YOU WANTED TO COME UP WITH A RELIGION THE GOD HAS TO BE SOMETHING MORE REALISTIC! IM SORRY BUT MY SPEGHETTI DOES NOT TALK TO ME IT IS NOT JESUS! Lol you all are way to funny XD You guys must be on some good drugs, pass that shit around. Sooo like are you guys in a cult or something?? What are the disciples of this spaghetti guy? A piece of garlic toast and a meat ball? LOL!!!! You guys are soo sick i wouldnt even spit in your direction and when you all die im gonna piss on ALL of your graves!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA You are all a joke!! I will tie down everyone of you sick bastards and force feed you guys spaghetti!!! and i will scream out “weres you fuckiNG spaghetti bitch now? Is he gonna save you? NOO! Cause hes NOT REAL!” Do you guys like revolve around food or something? Like cause you have fine art taco photography?!? Who the dumb bitch who thought of this religion??? Cause i bet you money they were on shrums at the time or maybe some fucking acid! Cause this is some trippy shit! AND yes i do believe in hell! But im not gonna go to hell for believing in a false idol like you stupid spaghetti! JESUS CHRIST I STILL CANT EVEN GET OVER THE FACT THAT YOU BELIEVE IN THIS BULLSHIT!!! DO THEY LIKE FORCE FEED YOU THIS SHIT? LIKE SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT?
WTF???That does not look like a spaghetti monsterrrr you dumb cunt! SUCK MY BIG BLACK PRESIDENTIAL COCK BITCH!
- jade-jewel
you dumb bitch
Published by Bobby Henderson February 20th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 472 Comments
472 Responses to “you dumb bitch”
Oh… this chick is funny…
I love when people are so self-riteous! And she is just so violent!
“I believe in hell… but you are diffinately going there! HOW DARE YOU THINK FOR YOURSELF!”
Pure genius.
Can we start a slow clap? :D hahahahaha
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They are so hateful….
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…”and then fifteen minutes after writing this FSM from the sky and they were never heard from again mwahahahaha!”…
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this guy must be on speed first hes pissed at fsm then he laughs at us then hes pissed again some christains are so violent
and: SOME RANDOM PASSERBY NAMED DAVE some people dont have a choice in what religon they are a part of most public schools are teached christianity from Prep to grade 12 is there much of a choice there?
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Ok, so the grammar issue has been touched on already, so I won’t waste my breath (or finger strength). The part about this that bothers me more than the grammar is that this person-type thing that wrote this comment seriously thinks that Jesus talks to [it]. Furthermore, I have never heard a devout christian use such language and hatred toward anyone or anything. Not to bring up that unfortunate best-selling children’s story, but the bible says to love everyone as you love yourself. Well, I guess all are not destined to know the Glory of His Holy Noodliness.
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I find it funny that someone would call this religion retarded and stupid, and through the course of this person’s nonsensical rambling uses some of the worst grammar and spelling I’ve ever seen. I mean if your going to ridicule something you could at least try and sound smart about it. Ultimatley, this person is a douchebag. FSM 4 life!
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his noodly appendage be blessed, your comment fills me and the other pastafarians with noodly joy!
RAmen.
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how very christian of you….just a side note…..not every religion follows the whole 12 deciples of a zombie thing.
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I, the Eternal Flying Spaghetti Monster, was deeply upset by this hateful, so called “Christian” man’s response. If you choose not to believe in me, I understand, for I would be skeptical if I were you. However, I respect your choice to believe in God, Jesus, and the Bible, and, although I am all powerful, I would not punish you for not believing in me. The thing I find unacceptable is your intolerance toward my disciples, and, for that matter, all people who do not agree with your beliefs. I suspect that your “God” would not approve of your hateful, foul-mouthed comments. I have seen many others like you, and I will not forget. You will be punished for your rude, intolerant speech.
–FSM
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FUCKING SPEGHETTI I MEAN COME ON IF YOU WANTED TO COME UP WITH A RELIGION THE GOD HAS TO BE SOMETHING MORE REALISTIC!
Exactly! Cause we all know that an invisible being that is everywhere, all knowing, and all powerful is way more realistic than a ball of spaghetti. I mean, when have any of you actually seen evidence of spaghetti and 2 meatballs existing!
Thank you Jade-Jewel for washing away these people’s ignorance. It’s about time somebody stepped in and made some valid points around here.
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Oh please, FSM laughs at fools like this Jade person. The way it’s written makes it just impossible to take seriously-there are such things as language skills, man!
Sheesh.
All hail FSM and silliness!
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FSM Loves you and he will forgive your sins of hate.
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For shame…using the Lord’s name in vain…and if you’re going to use the colloquial term for hallucinogenic mushrooms… well, I could be wrong, and I feel a little silly questioning your spelling and grammar since you are obviously so much better educated than I, but I think its “shrooms” not “shrums.” And since you have obviously seen his noodly goodness in person, perhaps you could render a more accurate artistic rendering of him?
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some random passerby named dave
Feb 26th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
i don’t even believe in the FSM but i can easily tell you that you are stupid for all those things you said.
that was a quote from the dude who posted above me
Now, if this was posted on a christian site I would have to post something like, “We used to stone you fucking sons of bitches, but we aren’t allowed to do that anymore when there’s more than one cop around”
Since I’m on a pastafarian (I HAVE BEEN TOUCHED BY HIS NOODLY APPENDAGE) site, then I must say this:
You don’t need to believe, but if you don’t what are you doing on a site for believers?
And also,
IM SO MAKING MY OWN FINE ART TACO PHOTOS!!!
THATS FRIGGIN AMAZING!!!!!
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Hendarob,
I at first had trouble grasping a spaghetti diety too. I mean, honestly, it did seem quite silly. What did I do? I concentrated very hard to envision him as a Flying Macaroni Monster. Quite a more normal concept, easier to grasp. After a few weeks I moved from macaroni to fusilli and then to penne. I ended up using about 7 or 8 different shorter pastas (I can’t remember very well, I was such a mess in those days and Id rather not talk about it). The largest leap of faith though was definetly to longer pasta. I started with linguini then on to fettuccine and then spaghettini. A few weeks ago I made the final leap over to Spaghetti and haven’t turned back since!
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Hm. All I have to say to this is: Wow, you seem quite the spiritual and religious person! Look, everyone has different beliefs. Are you going to swat my ice cream cone out of my hand because it’s vanilla and you hate vanilla? No. That’d be ridiculous. Worry about your own beliefs.
And may I ask this: Have you seen a God before? How would you know? There is no scientific proof to support or disprove any exsistance of supernatural beings. And by the way you’re speaking: you should work on your morals. I’m assuming your reference to Jesus is because you are a Christian, and if so… does your God feel okay with you using vulgar language? I think not, that’s not what your little book says.
You claim that for anyone to follow a belief, no matter how strange it may be, has to be doing illegal substances? You are quite clueless. You need to open your eyes and take in the real world – what are the chances of an Imaginary Man in the sky? Very slim. And with logic and rational thinking, you’d see that even believing in an Imaginary Man in the sky is completely foolish.
The Christian faith is merely set up so that you fear. You fear, so you believe. No harm will come to you because you believe. You can never do wrong, you can never be harmed, and you will live forever in the land of rainbows and butterflies. Reality check: That is NOT how life is. It’s human nature to want something to believe in, because humans can’t solve everything and protect themselves. We are mortal, and we all will suffer, deal with pain, and die one day. Nobody can save us but ourselves.
How do you know you do not believe in a false idol? There were religions before Christianity, your god could be considered a false idol for all you know. You’re very disrespectful, religion is centered around faith. But faith gets you nowhere in the end, just gets your hopes up for nothing. And might I add that next time you try and bash other’s – you learn to spell better. You type like a child, and by doing so, you are viewed as a child. But quite frankly I’d assume you are one.
Get over yourself, nobody can protect you or save you. Let people believe in what they wish, you are a terrible person if you try and change what people focus their lives around.
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Sometimes I really don’t understand all of the hatred that so-called Christians spew. I was raised as a Catholic, I know what Jesus Christ taught, and it certainly wasn’t to hate everybody who has different ideas and beliefs than yourself. In fact, I believe Christianity teaches us to love one another. And by the way, I’m no longer a practicing Catholic, and I went through my atheist phase when I was younger, and then became agnostic, but this Pastafarianism thing is too interesting to ignore. I’ve been anti-religion for so long, so this really speaks to me.
I sincerely hope that this guy finds an outlet for all of his anger, aggression, and pent-up homosexual feelings.
RAmen
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Yes, this is a troll. It must be a troll. There is no other explanation. This is a troll or jade-jewel is a. retarded, b.deluded and/or c. batshit insane.
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That is a fine example of what hate mail should look like.
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Jade-Jewel, I swear A LOT, but I don’t usually type it. Judging by your post, I’d say your about 13 years old. But If you believe in Christ that strongly, your already lost. Go join a monistary, you freak!
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Jade-Jewel,
You and your contribution here are truly as a precious stone. If only the world had more people like you, we could spend less time working and loving and watching Ben Stiller movies, and much more time cursing and swearing at each other to absolutely noone’s benefit. :-)))
Thelonious
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This IS my favourite hate mail ever. LOL.
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……I am trying to be a loving christian, but I get really confused about what that is when people act as demented as this. This person is gonna go through their entire life with their head shoved up their butt so they can’t be “corrupted” by knowledge. Or common sense. Or a sense of humor.
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My fellow catholic,
modern medical science has made many advancements in treating Bipolar disorder. please seek help before it’s to late for you.
lovingly,
Jesus
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hehehehehehe
1.your insane.
2.is the flying spaghetti monster fake? NO he is real… i talk to him all the time… jesus is real too… i should know i am him… yes that is right i am jesus… but i am not the decendant of the cristian god… i am a decendant of the FLYING SPAGHTTI MONSTER!!!!!!
alot of you will be shocked to hear this but i need to come clean…i didnot live on earth 2008 years ago…that was an imposter… ,and i am sick and tired of people saying i live a sinless life!!!!! LIES!!!!!!
but that is not important what is important is that the flying spaghetti monster is real! and he could kick your A** anytime he wanted to…. me and him and all the other pastafarians would jump you…. have a nice day henderob
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That’s not very christian like, is it!?!
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Hello,
Acutally these drugs are quite good. And also although I may be high, who’s sick and demented, you threatening to kill our deity. Also you are quite rude. And uhhh yeah. As I was saying, you must be pretty stupid to not realize that this is a parody of religion. THIS IS NOT AN ACTUAL RELIGION. I don’t want to spend all day pointing out how Christianity is twisted, I have home work to do. FUCK YOU.
-J.T.S.
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oh this guy is on a roll, not that it needs to be a guy, but the funny part is that he had no logic behind his hate mail, sorry Jade-guy we listen to people that have a legit point. And can you quiet down with the cussing? i think you might go to hell for that too, if your not GENUINELY SORRY. The spagetti monster is an expression of random theories to fill in the blank for why we are on this planet and how it happened. like the pirate thing, pirates > global warming pirates
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Wasn’t hate one of the deadly sins?
If there is someone who is going to hell it is you, not being able to cope with the belief of others and displaying hatred in that way.
For being a Christian you sure swear much and I have obviously never met a person more stupid. Jesus would be ashamed having you as one of his followers
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…and I quote “IF YOU WANTED TO COME UP WITH A RELIGION THE GOD HAS TO BE SOMETHING MORE REALISTIC!”… The scariest thing about this is not the fact that this person is ignorant, but the fact that with this kind of mindset they could be our next President.
-Science is an exact science.
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“jesus is real too… i should know i am him… yes that is right i am jesus” I would like to say that you are wrong, I’m Jesus and I’m actually the sun of a slut who didn’t want to get killed. FSM could be my father, he was probably pretty drunk.
-Jesus
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Wow, first of all this hait mail message, is just like a rant.
You act as though using as many curses as you makes you sound smart. Stop being rude to us, eveyone can believe in what they wish. Your in no position to criticize us.
Plus you say were stupid for these beliefs, but you, you find the need to be horrid to others, because its different from what you know. Which is just pathetic…
I choose to be a Pastafarian, and i’m proud.
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Sooooooo…let me get this straight…
Spaghetti is LESS realistic than a higher being that lives in the clouds, osmosis’d a baby into some virgin’s uterus, killed said son, brought him back to life, than abra cadabra’d him back up to “heaven”???
At least spaghetti and pirates actually exist.
Sheesh.
You have no argument.
We win.
Beer is tasty.
Your heaven doesn’t have beer.
Ours is better.
Neener neener.
RAmen.
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Hahaha, I give my thanks to whoever sent this e-mail for cheering me up.
Ahh, what a good laugh.
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Isn’t swearing a sin? Also all you Catholics/Christians are way to controversial, one of you said that Christianity teaches to respect each others beliefs and here you go saying that you are superior and are going to punish us in a similar manor to your “lord and saviour!”?
May you be blessed by his noodly appendage,
RAmen.
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Wow! We really should be spending more tax dollars on education. This is the beginning of the end.
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She’s a great Christian. Promising us complex-carbs and all.
FSM be with you Jade
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Only a christian could have writen something this stupied. I wonder if, when hes sobers up, he’ll realize how stupied he sounds.
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Wow….. this hate-mail is coming from a “Loving caring religion”……… If Christianity is all about love and peace and what not, why are we being attacked? We did nothing wrong to them and they just start swearing and foaming at the mouth.
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clearly this guy isn’t serious.If your taking what he says serious enough to write a huge letter telling him how dumb he is then you clearly have issues you need to sort out. I mean, spaghetti, seriously. No one in their right mind believes this for real. Its a joke to make people like you lose it and write idiotic letters that really aren’t accomplishing anything. My suggestion, lighten up. If this guy believes in a giant meal that flies around so be it. You should just chill because your acting just as mental as this guy.
Take a joke.
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im new to the FSM thing the only reason that i got here is b/c my good friend sent me here. i belive in Jesus and GOD but dosent the Bible teach forgivness? im a beliver in GOD but a friend of all religions. by the way i love the taco photgraphy! only a ture indivual can think of somthing like that!
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wow….such bad grammar…..it makes my eyes bleed. I’m sorry your intellect is so low you have to result to using curse words to push the point your trying to make “whatever that may be”. Also it seems you have mood swings as i will point out how you seem to go from “cursing lunatic who thinks that just because your pitiful excuse for a brain can’t comprehend his noodely goodness he has to go apeshit crazy on a bunch of people who believe in something other then himself (which makes you a bigot…no…not a *bitch* as im sure that peice of sludge that somehow function inside that thick skull of yours sees it….) and all of a sudden your talking about mushrooms,pot,acid and spaghetti and laughing about it, then saying your going to tie us down and feed us spaghetti while screaming obscenities….sounds like someone needs therapy…lots of it…(JESUS CHRIST I STILL CANT EVEN GET OVER THE FACT THAT YOU BELIEVE IN THIS BULLSHIT!!! DO THEY LIKE FORCE FEED YOU THIS SHIT? LIKE SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT?
WTF???That does not look like a spaghetti monsterrrr you dumb cunt! SUCK MY BIG BLACK PRESIDENTIAL COCK BITCH!) Last time i checked christianity shoved a whole bunch of shit down peoples throats but of course why pick proven science over some omnipotent being who lives in another dimension and sent his son down so he could be nailed to a peice of plywood! i also like how you put extra r’s in monster it really shows your intelligence. i also like the homosexual reference on the end. how does presidential fit in there? honestly is like me sticking words in places where they don’t belong. So republican taco stereo please next time year lamp please paint iron try to make your argument sound like it’s not coming out of the mouth of some kid in junior high.
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lol i love it when people cant take a joke
oh, by the way, that part where you’ll pee on all our graves?
very christian of you.
god bless america
(its funny because he cant because he DOESNT EXIST!!! :])
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WTF???That does not look like a spaghetti monsterrrr you dumb cunt! SUCK MY BIG BLACK PRESIDENTIAL COCK BITCH!
- jade-jewel
I’m not sure what your spaghetti looks like but mine looks pretty close to the great FSM “without the inclusion of eyes”.
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Wow someone has a two digit IQ. The grammer and puctuation is that of an two year-old on a bad drug trip and the “f” word(refuseing to say ,er type it) countless times. I bet this is the type af person who shoots stuff for fun.
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lolz damn that was funny to read! lol
this hate mail here is awesome, I wish that the vatican’s site had one too XD
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Ok, I would like to start off by saying that I’m a Christian. But looking at that hatemail just fuckin’ pisses me off! I hate it when people of different religions try to shove theirs down other peoples’ throat… What ever happened to peace on Earth?? God is a peaceful deity. He wouldn’t want his followers bitching at Pastafarians. I’m also sure the FSM is peaceful too. I support Pastafarianism. It is a peaceful religion. The Pastafarians have done nothing to harm Christians, which is why I’m truly sorry you must read shit like hatemail.This is not a game about who can win This “War of the Gods” Peace, people, please!
May we be blessed both by the Word of God, but also by His Noodly Appendage
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1. I’m pretty sure Jesus wouldn’t like your language.
2. I could force feed you Jesus (Eucharist) and scream wheres your Jesus bitch now but that still wouldn’t solve anything.
3. I’m pretty sure some of us think you Jesus lovers are on acid but were nice enough not to say it in capitols with cuss words.
4. Think WWJD. I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t write this kind of offensive crap offensive.
5. If you have an opinion state it and support with facts not cuss words.
So Yeah.
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Wow… i cant belive you actually took the time to write all of that nonsense
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Dude? Why are you so violent? We are a peaceful religion and we love everybody…
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