YOU DUMB BITCH!!! this is no such thing as a fucking flying spaghetti monster and hes not god ! If he were real i would chop that bitch up and feed him to the poor starving people in africa! you people are sick and demented, and your all going to fucking hell! FUCKING SPEGHETTI I MEAN COME ON IF YOU WANTED TO COME UP WITH A RELIGION THE GOD HAS TO BE SOMETHING MORE REALISTIC! IM SORRY BUT MY SPEGHETTI DOES NOT TALK TO ME IT IS NOT JESUS! Lol you all are way to funny XD You guys must be on some good drugs, pass that shit around. Sooo like are you guys in a cult or something?? What are the disciples of this spaghetti guy? A piece of garlic toast and a meat ball? LOL!!!! You guys are soo sick i wouldnt even spit in your direction and when you all die im gonna piss on ALL of your graves!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA You are all a joke!! I will tie down everyone of you sick bastards and force feed you guys spaghetti!!! and i will scream out “weres you fuckiNG spaghetti bitch now? Is he gonna save you? NOO! Cause hes NOT REAL!” Do you guys like revolve around food or something? Like cause you have fine art taco photography?!? Who the dumb bitch who thought of this religion??? Cause i bet you money they were on shrums at the time or maybe some fucking acid! Cause this is some trippy shit! AND yes i do believe in hell! But im not gonna go to hell for believing in a false idol like you stupid spaghetti! JESUS CHRIST I STILL CANT EVEN GET OVER THE FACT THAT YOU BELIEVE IN THIS BULLSHIT!!! DO THEY LIKE FORCE FEED YOU THIS SHIT? LIKE SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT?
WTF???That does not look like a spaghetti monsterrrr you dumb cunt! SUCK MY BIG BLACK PRESIDENTIAL COCK BITCH!
- jade-jewel
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
Misc.
This guy is so rite!!! Ya’ll are retarted for believing this and your gonna go to hell for teaching it to other people go read the Bible and you will understand come on if you believe this CRAP u have to be high or somthing! come on look at your self Itailans created Spaghetti so how could it create us???? If we had to creat it!!!! WAKE UP!!! your fucked up if you go teaching other people this!!!! so you better go get your bibles out and Pray to God for forgivness I will sure pray for you don’t worry!
I don’t hate your religion so much. Why do you hate mine? The FSM does not talk to me, but does Jesus talk to you? I think not.
Also, if you think about it, your god is actually impossible. You believe your god is all-powerful and all-seeing.
But if he is all seeing, he would be able to see into the future. As this means he would not be able to change the future, there is only one thing he can do, therefore he is not all-powerful.
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This guy is so rite!!! Ya’ll are retarted for believing this and your gonna go to hell for teaching it to other people go read the Bible and you will understand come on if you believe this CRAP u have to be high or somthing!
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Many Pastafarians have read your bible. We feel you worship the same Flying Spaghetti Monster, you simply do not know its form (spaghetti) yet and seem to think he is a wrathful being. If the flying Spaghetti Monster did create a lake of fire similar to that described as your Hell, it must be purely for aesthetics… like one of those huge water fountains in front of a nice hotel. It could also be useful for such things as s’mores for those who wish to enjoy them.
Undetectable…check
Omnipotent…check
Creator of everything…check
I think we’re talking about the same being here. The similarities are uncanny.
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come on look at your self Itailans created Spaghetti so how could it create us???? If we had to creat it!!!! WAKE UP!!!
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The Italians created the food we call spaghetti in his image. Praise be unto them for such a great and popular reminder to us all of the FSM.
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your fucked up if you go teaching other people this!!!! so you better go get your bibles out and Pray to God for forgivness I will sure pray for you don’t worry!
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As I said, we already pray to the God you speak of. We just know his true form, call him the FSM instead of the generic term “God”, and know of his unconditional love and benevolence.
We wouldn’t presume to bother you to pray for us so. Please use your time for more constructive things.
HA! you go to fucking hell man, FSM is kool.
i always thought that religion was a crutch for the weak but the church of the FSM in fuckin’ awesome.
Haven’t read the whole thread, but no one I saw hypothesized that jade-jewel is on our side, just trying to parody hate-mail to the extreme degree. I’d say he/she doesn’t do a great or very clearly humorous job with the parody, but c’mon: can someone have seriously written “I MEAN COME ON IF YOU WANTED TO COME UP WITH A RELIGION THE GOD HAS TO BE SOMETHING MORE REALISTIC! IM SORRY BUT MY SPEGHETTI DOES NOT TALK TO ME IT IS NOT JESUS!” That HAS to be satire–I’m serious, not doing a reflexive mock-up [no matter how appropriate that might be]. Always glad to help clear issues up, RDM
All praise Colombus the Toast of Garlic
Wow, you have left me utterly awestruck by the kind of behaviour that causes me to dislike religion in the first place. If you have a problem with someone’s opinions that’s fine but keep it in your head, not all opinions need to be voiced.
If you want to really make me mad, Try actually having an argument that is worth my time. I actually laughed when I read this.
The noodly appendage can, and will still save you my son.
Amazing how some people just can’t understand the concept of SATIRE.
Captain Joe and swerratass are the smartest people here, and RDM is a close second.
Jade-jewel is the one on drugs, methinks.
” when you all die im gonna piss on ALL of your graves!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA You are all a joke!! I will tie down everyone of you sick bastards and force feed you guys spaghetti!!! and i will scream out “weres you fuckiNG spaghetti bitch now? ”
Because a “sick bastard” would never write something like that…
this guy won’t go to hell for worshiping false idols as he put it, he will just go to hell for using the “lords” name in vain as he did several times in his hate mail message.
I happen to be a militant Agnostic and that’s not going to change but I have to say I do enjoy reading the crazy rhetoric posted by all these bible thumping christians…I have a thought take you fanatical christian religion keep it to yourself where it belongs, or better yet take up a more constructive pass time like ohhhh masturbation, you’d be getting more out of it.
Phobal
Its all right just take ur pills and calm down
Calm ur puss ok calm
what is wrong with these people? if they wanna believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster then let em be..theres nothing wrong with that! christianity teaches us to respect every human being, yet you people come on this guys site and talk crap…oh yea you’re real martyrs…fuckin hypocrites!
My oh my. I don’t know what to say… wait, yes I do.
Who is really more bizarre? The person who believes in the Flying Spaghetti Monster, or the person who writes a ridiculously long message about how stupid they think the FSM is [Wasting their time, really. Not like anyone’s really going to care.]?
I have trouble understanding how you demand us to find something more “realistic” to believe in. I’m sorry, but Jesus was born from a virgin? They obviously didn’t have sex ed around when your bible was being written. Another thing, why would you want to tie us down and feed us spaghetti? We like spaghetti. We like it so much we worship it. Tying us down and forcefeeding us spaghetti is in accordance to our religion the equivalent of if we tied you in a church and forced you to listen to a sermon. Another thing, I would appreciate if you did not refer to the creater of our religion as a “dumb bitch.” Bitch refers to a woman, and Bobby Henderson is actually a man. Use a little more of an appropriate insult, please. Finally, I would also like to remind you that correct sentences never begin with the word “and”, are never in all capitals, and BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA is an extremely unneccessary word under any circumstance. If you could please revise your hate mail with these corrections, I might consider taking it any more seriously than I take your god.
I just have to say…these people claim to be Christian? I’ve read the bible, and no, most of it doesn’t make any logical sense to me. But, I did note that Jesus was supposed to have taught a message of love and tolerance, not hatred and condemnation. Christianity itself makes no sense to me. They can’t even agree on what the bible means. You don’t have Christians. You have Catholics, and Protestants, Baptists, and Lutherans. I personally am proud to be a Pastafarian. RAmen.
Um… you think WE’RE on drugs? Oh, I’m sorry. You’re not on crack, you are obviously an unfortunate victim of an acute case of Tourrette’s Syndrome. My sincerest apologies. I do hope that His Noodly Appendage may cure your rather… explicit illness. I should point out that our prophet is a man, and a holy one at that. I guess b**** is just the first explitive that popped into that touched head of yours (and not the good kind of touched). I do question your logic, though. I would think that the only person who could come up with such a solid counter-arguement to our humble religion must be the devoutest of orthodox fundamentalists. Yet you spout such vulgar explitives. I’d think such a person would at least be able to control the typing of such insults, even if you are shouting them at your poor, poor monitor. I’m sorry, but I cannot stand idly by while you degrade my beloved religion. I must react. Here it goes: You’re a meanie. There. I said it. Forgive me, fellow Pastafarians for stooping to this level. I will repent. As for you, Jade-Jewel, I will pray for you.
RAmen