u fucking idiots r on some fucking good weed. a flying spaghetti monster you know what im going to do eat your god then shit him out on your porch yes u the guy who invented this bullshit religion. you know what else im going to invent a religion yeah, ill call them the flying buttfuckers and we will think god is a flying pair of asscheeks. you fuckin disgrace to life
-m
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
…Get some brains before you judge us. This is possibly the worst hate mail here.
is m perhaps a sister organization to the society of L? Or is it the same guys who get their organization shut down and moves on to the next letter in the alphabet?
@m
“u fucking idiots”
.
No, you’re at the wrong website if you’re looking for IDiots. For IDiots, go to
.
http://www.discovery.org/csc/
.
As for the fucking bit, I would hope that most of the Pastafarian congregation are enjoying a pleasant sex life. But what was your point in bringing that up in your post (several times actually)?
I’m glad I’m not that stupid. It must be tough.
“a flying spaghetti monster you know what im going to do eat your god then shit him out on your porch yes u the guy who invented this bullshit religion. you know what else im going to invent a religion yeah, ill call them the flying buttfuckers and we will think god is a flying pair of asscheeks. you fuckin disgrace to life”
.
Wow! So much hate, so much anger and we’re the disgrace to life. You must be deeply religious.
.
Instead of inventing a religion, you should learn grammar and punctuation.
Eat away, O my son, for soon you will be blessed by His Noodly Appendage.
RAmen.
And your a “fuckin disgrace” to the keyboard. Btw sorry but did you just say you would shit on someones porch? Each to his own I guess.
“I like your Christ. I do not like your Chistians. Your Christians are nothing like your Christ.”
.
Mahatma Ghandi
Has anyone ever missed a point this badly?
And I guess that Illiterate Morons are a blessing to life…
Ahhh, good old fashioned hate from a hypocritical semi-literate ‘tard. I love it.
And a good day to you too sir.
whatever
At least he’s not a Xtian…no capitals.
Why are the illiterate people who can’t be bothered to spell out words like ‘you’ and ‘r’, or use capitalization or periods, so fascinated with homosexuality? I think it says a lot more about the poster than it says about us.
-PS. –m, get an education, so at least when you are spewing nonsense everyone else can figure out what the hell you trying to say.
you realise this is a joke don’t you??
oh wait this is probably another christianity nut job
grow up and let people have a sense of humour
oh and if you are trying to make yourself look good try not to swear it only makes you look like you have a fraction of a amoeba’s intelligence.
Flardox
you know this is only a joke right?
If not then you are a
(a) a religous nut-job
(b) a highly religous yokel
(c) a idiot
I vote for (c)
if you are trying to look big improve on your vocabulary your swearing only makes you look like you have the intelligence span of an amoeba.
Flardox
Nice to see such an articulate and well-written letter of concerned criticism.
And you’re a disgrace to spelling and grammar.
And here we see the results of human inbreeding. May his noodliness forgive him.
And here we see the reults of human inbreeding. May his noodliness forgive him.
Wow, I didn’t think gay people would “hate” our religion.. given that it’s probably one of the free-est religions out there in terms of sexuality, race, colour… meh whatever..
Whoo first!
What single mom forgot to put parental locks on their latchkey 15 year old’s computer? I am surprised it’s not in all caps though so kudos to that. Estimated IQ = 42 (and yes, I realize that IS the answer to life, the universe and everything).
If that’s what you please, then by all means worship a flying set of cheeks.
Henderob,
You are what’s wrong with society. You’re lack of understanding in the area of satire indicates that you are of low intelligence. Your composition skills comfirm this. If English is your first language, consider enrolling in a local elementary school. It’s the only place you’ll be able to get writing instruction at a level appropriate for you.
A better alternative for society would be self-sterilization, so this ignorance and compositional impairment will end with you.
Oh, and don’t bother to respond since you write too poorly to make a coherent point.
Hahahaha. Oh how I missed these comments… Just as long as the cheeks are up to par, I bid you good fortunes with your new religion.
Umm, ass cheeks don’t fly, m. Any idiot knows this. Sheesh.
u fucking idiots r on some fucking good weed. a god who incestuously fucked his own mother to have himself, you know what im going to do crucify your god then burn effigy of him on your porch yes “god” the guy who invented this bullshit religion.
-b
Wow. That was F-ING awesome. He’s a real F-ING ray of sunshine, isn’t he?
Are you really going to invent a religion called the flying buttfuckers?
I know a lot of gays that will enjoy this religion with you.
Please send your ass-dress for them.
Considering your hate-mail sounds almost the exactly like other hate-mail we get try something original next time. So go back to your trailer park and try to be creative in your next email. However, considering your probably have an very low I.Q. I doubt that is possible. At least try to find a more creative email to plagiarize.
RAmen!
Wow. Somebody didn’t pass their English GCSE…
Wow. You swear too much. And even though I’m new, I know that our religion will live on for decades and PROSPER!!!! unlike your “bullshit religion” we have a god and we all love him. Your religion will teach to hate, just like satanists and christian. I think…..
You swear too much.
RAmen.
Wow. He really told us. I would curl up and start crying if the FSM was not protecting me. All Glory to the noodles!
Maybe I’m not on the proper weed, but I can’t understand any of this gibberish. Who is the idiot?
Where has originality gone…the pissed off satanist was much more interesting
Yawn.
I certainly am impressed by that well thought out, elegantly expressed, coherent statement.
i can feel the love :)
Once you make your religion, are people going to join? will you have graphs? or will it just be a childish dirty term with “flying” attached to it? My guess is, your religion would be far worse than this “fucking disgrace to life.”
Again, here we have some foul-mouthed person, probably a Christian, who makes a comment that has homosexual undertones.
.
There’s definitely a pattern here.
All of this hate mail has become boring with its repetitiveness.
Well, lookee here. Somebody who learned his grammar from the fundies and got his disposition from Michael Savage. Enjoy your asscheeks and seriously, when you post again in a couple of days, come up with something original.
Wow, I see Mr Dictionary has deserted us again…’
And what’s up with ‘Henderbob is illiterate’?
I found the Gospel to be the most coherent, witty, well thought out text on any subject, not just religion, I have ever read.
y so much profanity
you know
i myself am not a pastafaien (im israeli.we aint got many of you guys here. damn shame)
but this does seem to me that there is way too much hostile response to pastafarianisem in the world
this is even more strange when u consider that this seems to be one of the most peace loving religions in the world today
and i think the right way to promote it is to file for tax exempt status
becouse if its granted u win
and if its not it helps to raise the qustion
how do you define a religion
like i said im not one of you but i am in law school and if u want then in a few years once i pass the bar i would love to represent u in such a case
im not a pastafarien but next purim (jewish version of Halloween) im going as a Pirate
Wow. The logic of his argument was breathtaking. The ample use of the word “fucking”, prose at its best. I am whole. He has convinced me to give up Pastafarian and follow his God. Excuse me, his fucking God.
Well, that’s kind of rude and unnecessary, but your views are your own. Might I suggest you have a nice bowl of pasta and relax?
RAmen
Yeah so, I thought this was seriously funny. coming from a teenagers point-of-view I think the religion is funny. It is funny to an extent I was almost dying of laughing. Either way. Your seriously fucking retarded whomever posted this you should go back to you fucking whore-faced cunt for a mother. Fucktard.
See even teenagers can be bitches. (: Now, Go die.
With love and care,
Ron.
I have come to a conclusion.
Hate mail is really boring.
well, we are on some good weed actually. Become a pastafarian and you can share!
peace love and pirates
RAmen
If your religion gets a holy book going, then I’m in. I’ll believe anything with a manuscript that carefully provides for why it cannot be disproven. Also, you need to thnk of some more creative insults, maybe you should learn to read, then read a book, and help yourself to expand your vocabulary. Lastly, if you want to believe in you crazy religion, go right ahead. The USA has something called the First Amendment, which grants freedom of religion to everyone. We decided to include it in our Constitution right after we had written the whole thing, but then invented the concept of freedom, and realized it deserved to be included. I would theorize that you don’t know anything about freedom because you live int eh proud nation of Oceania, under the benevolent rule of Big Brother.
@henderob is illiterate Jan 26th, 2008 at 8:01 pm
“Henderob, You are what’s wrong with society. You’re lack of understanding in the area of satire indicates that you are of low intelligence. Your composition skills comfirm this. If English is your first language, consider enrolling in a local elementary school.”
.
Poor henderob :(
I have heard from a reliable source that his spelling isn’t always the best :p
.
“Published by henderob January 26th, 2008 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism).”
.
“henderob” is our Prophet Bobby, but I think if he doesn’t want to keep getting the blame for writing hate mail to himself, he could change that format. ;p)
Oh and @m..
Ho hum..
*yawn*
Man. I can’t wait for you to create a religion with flying ass cheeks. it sounds great. now when you send hate mail to other strangers saying ‘love my god’ you’ll be saying ‘kiss my ass!!!’
“[T]his does seem to me that there is way too much hostile response to pastafarianisem in the world.” A good response, if peace is really a goal. “[w]e aint got many of you guys here. damn shame.”
Thanks, to our Israeli friend, bladeofdarkness. And not too damn many damn expletives! Sounds like a next step in evolution? F’n-A! Jah! Pastafari!!
@RV
FSM loves the Trailer Park, Lot’s of Ramen Noodles get eaten there.
am i right to be worried that he is promising to defecate on his porch?
someone warn the postal person, although it is likely this would not be a first, so perhaps they already know.
so much intolerance in the world.
Well…you misspelled ” fucking ” so…I’m guessing you are composed of mostly fail.
“…eat your god then shit him out …” I though that was something Christians did with the bread and wine.
r u dun yt? There really isn’t much need for this. Is there a point to get across? You have proven a few things. A) You’re about 7 B) You learned to use the word fuck. Woo hoo? and C) Your ass-god must have had some terrible digestion issues when you arrived here. Well done, my friend. Your dignity is in the negatives. Oh, and pasta definitely tastes better than buttocks.
Good luck with english class.
Chris.
I used to get so excited about hate-mail but now I just sigh about it.
.
*sigh*
While I fully encourage you to pursue the religion that makes you happy, Flying Buttfuckerism or otherwise, I caution you on writing a religious text. Remember, the Bible, Principia Discordia, The Five Classics, Tanakh, Qur’an, Shvetambara, Avesta Collection, Book of Shaddows, Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, Kojiki, Dianetics, Book of Subgenius, Daozang, and all other respectable religious texts are written eloquently and coherently in the respective language customary of the region of said text’s origin. Think and write carefully, I wish you the best, my fellow fifteen-year-old, and look forward to other, perhaps more pensive and comprehensive, comments!
RAmen.
And we’re supposed to be on weed? Wow.
@ M. Did I mention that every saturday, my dog Ralphie and I go out to a park and play a game of fetch with your god on a stick. Beats frisbie anyday
Flying Butcheek God? Yes, I’m sure the FSM could choose to take the form of a flying Ass, but I’m sure he figures that nobody would worship a giant Asshole.
Weed? No-no… that’s “oregano”!
Really.
I promise!
Ramen, dude.
I mean ok this seems really stupid, but if this dude believes it, he can believes what he wants to believe! i doubt he actually believes it, although he has put a BUNCH of time into this site, but still, just let it be. i too think it’s hilarious and actually didn’t bother to read the logic behind it, but no one has to be an ass hole bout it.
Did you notice that his caps lock key seems not to be functionning? (I am sure you did)
I see punctuation isn’t one of your strong points. Then again, rational thought isn’t, either. Also, I’d be hard-pressed to find a bigger asscheek than the abrahamic god, so your idea is already taken. I’d say try again, but I’d really rather you didn’t.
Enough bum jokes? You’re like a 7 year old. Hahaha….oh and to make capitals you have to hold shift while you type the letters…
So you’ll go around claiming that you’re a Flying-buttfuckerist? Well, good luck with that.
RAmen.
I wonder if posting these kinds of hate mail at this point only discourages people from taking the site seriously. At least from the xian wing. It might be more productive to try to encourage “rational” seeming responses from xians to post here - you know, really sucker them into reading here and then we can conduct our pirate conversion voodoo.
Like im sure there are plenty of wack angry xians, but I dont know that they really make for a compelling battle over sanity.
All I have to say is this: run-on sentence.
I like how you mimicked the fact that we eat our god and shit him out with your Flying Buttfuckers Church.
.
.
…Perhaps that was a bit subtle for you, “m”. I was working on the basis that you should eat out and shit on a buttfucker.
While henderbob could obviously use some lesson in spelling and grammar, there is no reason for MV to tell him/her to go back to their trailer park. There are many devout Pastafarians who reside in trailer parks who actually know how to spell and construct a coherent sentence. I personally don’t live in a trailer park or know how to construct sentences, but I don’t discriminate against anyone based on their place of residence.
Hahaha, Flying-buttfuckerist? I could see that.
ETAY!!! HAHAHAHA! That’s exactly what I was thinking.
I think we can all agree he doesn’t get it. Did he miss the sarcasm or is he just that stupid?
I believe that’s Buttfuckerans…
I hope he dose create his church because then we can say: “finally, someone gives a flying fuck!”
Ramen
What a loving christian response. The ecumenical movement is alive and well. Now go blank yourself.
HAHAHA this guy makes me laugh. I thought that was dog shit on my porch but i guess i was wrong
“u fucking idiots r on some fucking good weed”
Since we’re allowed to smoke weed in this religion, can we petition for some religious grade peyote too?
I am noticing some patterns here. Bad spelling, poor syntax, the inability to properly think in metaphors (witness such songs as “Open the eyes of my heart, lord”), indeed an unwillingness to see anything in a certain 2000+ year old anthology as “metaphorical”, irrational hostility toward those who beg to differ, and liberal uses of profanity.
Then, last night, I heard Mike Huckabee talk about how his mom used to fry up a squirrel for Sunday dinner when he was a kid, andit all fell into place. Think about it, how often do you hear crazy behavior described as “squirrelly”? It’s no accident, it’s because encephalitis is rampant in the North American squirrel population, and lots of bible believing people in the American south are eating these diseased animals in large quantities.
You got it, these people have mad squirrel disease, squirrel encephalitis, and is has dramactically affected their thought processes. Their brains have been made into swiss cheese by eating too many squirrels. Have pity on them, for they know not what they chow down on.
This makes FSM the salvation of these people, every time they feel the urge to eat something furry, they need to partake instead of spaghetti and meatballs. As a matter of fact, FSM should impose a dietary prohibition on squirrel. It should have its own book of Leviticus, and in it squirrel should be no more kosher than pig is in the original.
I know 15 year olds who can spell better than that, I’m one of em. This guy must be like 5 and a half.
Can I just point out an on-going error here? Several people are addressing their responses to ‘Henderob’. At the top of the post where it says ‘published by Henderob’, that just means that our glorious leader has published the mail on this site, the mail actually came from the signatory, in this case ‘m’. I assume that ‘m’ stands for ‘moron’ or ‘misfit’…something like that
Church of the Flying Buttfuckers? Anal Sex Airlines maybe? Kind sir I will pray that His noodley appendage touches your soul.
LOL
Buttfuckerists
are they hot idiots that we fuck?
soooo.
whats easier to beleive?
an inconsistent, self-contradictroy document that has only been about for approximately 2000 years. which has some pretty majoyr flaws in it as it is.
or a deity (spageity) that flys around bringin warmth to people with his noodly appendage?
well im stumped.
guess im what you call a spag-nostic
fuck off christian kids and let us have some fun.
LONG LIVE THE MONSTER!
No, but it’s just normal for you to believe in the invisible man that lives in the sky and is all knowing and seeing, loves us dearly yet does nothing to end our pain and suffering or improve our financial status, looks, health, popularity, etc. etc. etc. And still you believe he is there.
Hello, i don’t really know where to put this but here it goes. I’m a pastafarian down on my luck money wise and i have been getting alot of backlash for some members of the pastafarian community, because i do not own the gospel. Can some good hearted pastafarian please sent me a PDF of the gospel, only if you can though….
F-u stupied orthi christan this is OUR religon so go f urself
I R 5 YEARS OLD
Uh-oh, looks like someone’s having a particularly nasty period.
how can an ass be a buttfuck? an ass is incapable of fucking another ass… at least as far as I know… do you know something I dont?
Replying to U f-cking idiots.
Um, I think you’re missing the point, which is to say that Christianity and these other religions were also invented, perhaps with the same capriciousness as the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. You are not making a shocking revelation or scandal when you point out that the whole thing is invented. Of course it is. That you are so impervious to the obvious is hillarious!
I encourage you to pursue your religion of the flying pair of ass cheeks, and then demand that it get equal time in the classroom with other Creationist paradigms.
Calling the creators of this movement a fucking disgrace to life kinda illustrates the South Park episode “Go god Go” where people began killing each other in the name of “Science” instead of the name of god. Perhaps someday the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster will be sending suicide bombers to your Church of the Flying Pair of Asscheeks rallies.
I would sigh and say it’s just human nature, but it’s not. Most of us want to live our lives peacefully and let others do the same, but there are always a few control freak assholes in each camp of thought that want to oppress, fight, and marginalize those with other viewpoints.
Repying to Neal,
I will patiently remind you, as I do everyone else who complains about improper syntax and grammar, that this is the next generation, and their culture. They do not have time to manually spell check, nor is it their interest. They can quickly type a message and move onto the next thing in life, and probably accomplish more than you or I who have been habituated to dot all the I’s and cross all the T’s. In fact, they avoid reading posts as long as ours, because they have better things to do than to tackle paragraphs as long as ours!
To put it simply, it’s just a fucking post, not a term paper. So stop complaining, and deal with the new age of internet!
Are you also Generation X or older? You’ve probably also been brainwashed just as I was into believing stupid paradigms such as Christianity and stupid compulsions such as making every message long, self-indulgent, and punctually correct. Oh and btw, you had numerous spelling errors in your post.
I hope you were being ironical and facetious, in which case, so was I!
Well I’m a Pastafarian and proud!
Forgive them FSM, they know not what they do!
(poor critters, it’s all that free education that does it!)
Joe, excuse me, I’m 19, grew up with a cell and the internet, not all of us are lost! Some of us have been touched by his noodly appendage! Somehow he granted us unfathomable skills in English; I’m going so far as to say he gave us wit. Explain that “science”… huh, what’s that, you can’t? HA! Right there, more evidence in favor of the FSM. RAmen!
I was laughing so much when I first heard of this but now its starting to hit me what if a few thousand years ago some guy probably John or Paul was having a laugh and claimed he knew this dude called “God” who could do all these tricks, everyone laughed and said I gotta tell Mary and Judas this and thats how religion began!!! Maybe we are just spawning another awful religion! think of your children people.
I honestly think there is so much discrimination with what people want to say or want to believe. Its quite ridiculous. FREEDOM OF SPEECH AND RELIGION. Look it up in the Constitution…This hate mail is ridiculous. We don’t discriminate on what you have to say…so stop being a hypocrite and discriminating on others, and learn to take a joke and go back to basic 5th grade english. It might help with your grammar problems.
Tsk Tsk Tsk, speaking of the Noodly Ressurection with such disdain, how has a Buttfuckerian learned our religious secrets?
can someone say, “anger management” dude your a spaze why you even bother saying that crap? we just gonna disown you and ignore you…..well after we laugh at your ignorent comment…HAHAHAHH…ok im done now i recommend you find a doctor to put you on some relax meds or you should start back up on the ones you havnt been taking ;)
I guess some people just refuse to believe in a god that’s not in their own image.
Get thee to a nunnery (don’t ever breed)
Ramen!
The eloquent grammar and superb spelling in this hatemail truly dazzles me. He’s got my nomination for the Pulitzer.
RAmen and Carbo Diem.
everybody has the right to make an ASSana of himself, including those who believe in the god of flying buttcheeks. Oh yeah, some of ya’ll voted for him TWICE!
Carbo Diem, and keep practicing yer yogurt postures , especially Pastasana (the noodly pose).
May the Sauce be with you, hon!
Well, actually the mighty Buttcheekooyah DID (and perhaps still does) exist. He was worshiped by a great throng of benighted bird-brained dolts who believed that expulsion of hot gasses and the few varied sounds that made were the highest form of communication to be attained. They all began recklessly to imitate the Great Buttcheekooyah heedless of the possible consequences…and alas…the entire throng asphyxiated themselves! All but one, that is. All but the true believer Henderob who expulsed hot gasses in his name. All but Henderob who believed and withstood the challenge to his faith…namely the deaths of the entire following of Mighty Butcheekooyah. And so, with the mighty winds of his faith, perhaps Hendrob has given Buttcheekooyag the breath of life that every true believer lends his god in times of great distress.
We now have, in addition to FSM, the antagonistic rival god Automobilicous-The-Most-Vile who functions in much the same way as Butcheekooyah did. His followers worship him in a similar fashion and will no doubt reap the same consequences…May your bicycles glide as gracefully through time and space, and tread as tenderly on the earth as our great one slithers in his/her sauce.
I tell you this because I had a dream of a bicycle with neat round seat and handlebars ridden by a great tangled mass of bright rays. It was spinning effortlessly through a sea of bright red mud…I awoke to a vision of Flying Spaghetti Monster dangeling his noodely bits about before me and realized that this bicycle was simply one of his/her many glorious faces. Understanding the message I immediately had my car impounded, squashed, recycled and turned into 10 new bicycles. May your noodles always be boiled only in the purest spring water! May your sauce know only tomatoes that have breathed the finest mountain air! Ramen!
only idiots beleive in god because they are too weak to deal with the real life . like the rest of us sane people. they need a fantasy to hide behind. its like mommas apron strings. tthey cant deal with life with out it they are insane and only showing how dumb they are. they are all to willing to show it off to the rest of us. they make laugh because they are too stupid.to know the difference between real life and fantasy. thanks for a good laugh.
only idiots beleive in god because they are too weak to deal with the real life . like the rest of us sane people. they need a fantasy to hide behind. its like mommas apron strings. tthey cant deal with life with out it they are insane and only showing how dumb they are. they are all to willing to show it off to the rest of us. they make me laugh because they are too stupid.to know the difference between real life and fantasy. thanks for a good laugh.
I feel extremely offended by your statement, you assaulted my religion, and in this country we are so proud of, the U.S.A that is illegal, so get a life, please!
“ill call them the flying buttfuckers and we will think god is a flying pair of asscheeks.” - hey screw the FSM, I’m all over this one. I can’t wait to feel the wind beneath His cheeks.
I’m going to invent a religion too!!!!! I think I’ll call it Christianity.
Wow, the good old days where hate mail actually was funny, this is hilarious, if you tried to eat the FSM your stomach would not be able to fill even one noodly appendage, that is how large he is, stick to your priest’s appendage and back off.
RAmen
James D King of Pirates
you have obviously not been touched by his noodly apendage
James D, Daniel Ryan, and The Great Alien are all right!
I understand his anger towards FSM. But at the same time I don’t understand his blind faith in a God that we can’t prove exists. I mean it’s like believing in Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. It’s absurd and people bitching about it won’t make God any more real that Santa Claus.
YAY FOR THE FLYING BUTTFUCKERS!
where do I sign up for your flying buttcheeks religion. it’s got to be better than christianity.