Okay, so I know you’re probably not even going to read this, but I had to express myself.
First, a bit of my religious background. I was raised a Baptist, slowly came to realize that I didn’t believe a word the Bible says, and became Wiccan for two years. Then I had a “long dark night of the soul,” more commonly known as existential crisis, during the course of which I became agnostic. However, my closest friends are two devoted Catholics, an atheist, and another Wiccan. I do not make fun of or demean their beliefs, and they do not make fun of or demean me. None of us attempt to convert anyone, although we are willing to share information if asked for it. I am not sure what I think about the Kansas School Board issue, as it concerns the definition of science as well as faith, but I do know that even if I do not agree with some of my friends, I would never tell them they are being illogical.
Recently at my college, a spoken word artist performed. He was also agnostic, and one poem he wrote in particular spoke to me. He compared God to Diet Coke, saying that Diet Coke helps him get through the hard times in the same way that God helps others. So why take that away from people? The majority of Christians aren’t hurting anyone, are they? If their beliefs help them get through their lives without the despair I feel everyday due to my doubts, why ridicule them for it?
If you have actually read all this, thank you for your time. A reply, if you have time to write one, would be appreciated, but you do not have permission to repost my words anywhere.
Sincerely,
Z.E.
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
You need to read the website better, we are not against religion, we are just against religion being taught as science. Anyway, you must remember, some, if not all of the members of the Kansas school board were not Bob Hendersons friends.
Also, why are you upset with our Noodly Lord, he is a god, and as such, he helps us through hard times (Hatemail, fundies trying to get religion taught as science). Except he stays through the good times.
RAmen
Ooh, and don’t forget, we have people who are spagnostic. Want to join?
By the way, you saying you have no permission to post this blah blah blah, I think there is probably a disclaimer that says that by emailing him, he can publish it, and that by doing so, you accept this, or something like that.
RAmen
Ze Eric, what did you do with Ze Frank?!!
Anyway…
The thing is; no one’s going to worship Diet Coke, because we all know that Rum is the way to go.
Diet Coke is not good. Bad analogy. A recent study ( i am sorry I can not name the source ) stated that people that switch from coke to diet coke lose weight initially but end up gaining it back soon.
As an added note… drink water.
Diet Coke,
My Smoker’s Smoke,
Satisfies my cravings.
Coke Light,
See the light,
Coke is my God.
I sip the watery syrup,
The blood of Jesus,
tastes like sugar.
That is my diet coke-god poem. I wonder how it compares to the original.
Z.E.–Well, I think religion, and evangelical (fundamentalist) Christianity in particular, seems to be knocked and mocked here because only a very few who email or post have a thoughtful and well-spelled argument. The main point of FSMism is to demonstrate the ridiculousness of parading ID around as hard science. If you need God or Diet Coke in your life, for whatever reason, then that is your decision. However, I feel very put upon when many so-called “good Christians” (the ones who use “fuck” and “I hope you die” every other sentence) believe that it is their duty to convert every one in their path, and to completely knock down the line between church and state. I’m sorry you didn’t want your email reprinted, and it was, but it did spark some thoughtfullness on the parts of many Pastafarians. Plus, you seem like a good, nice person who had a thoughtful argument. Plus knowledge of spell-checker and no over-use of CAPS. So, thank you.
Diet Coke tastes really bad, as does your god in comparism to the FSM.
Z.E. -Don’t miss the point of the FSM. Read the online material and see if you can realise our raison d’etre. A hint could be our ID.
No one is ‘knocking god’ (and I’m pleased to note you used a little ‘g’). The FSM is just another little ‘g’, perhaps with a bit more humour than most, as neither ‘it/he/she’ takes its/his/herself seriously. Your post indicates your need for labels, ie Catholic, Wiccan, Existentialist, Agnostic, Atheist, etc. Where would you be without a label? Free, that’s what. Free to open your mind. Labels in the religious context are just ‘fingers pointing at the moon’. The FSM is just pointing his noodles. And the moon is mooning back at us all. Have courage, Z.E. You may yet get it. Until then, enjoy the pasta.
I guess I see now why this section is called hate-mail. Too bad folks have to resort to such rhetoric. After all, is not Christ’s message one of peace and love? Somehow it seems lost on many who profess faith in him. However, for the sake of civility, I’ll think of this as an open discussion forum. For the record, I’m a Christian, and a Paramedic. I don’t hate anyone. I was under the impression Intelligent Design was to be taught as a theory. With all the evidence to support it, isn’t evolution still a theory as well? I’ve been working in EMS for 18 years, and my experiences have given me some evidence of an intelligent design. The human machine is truly a remarkable thing, is it wrong to look at it, and theorize? Maybe man evolved from apes, maybe there were some funny looking monkeys, why must everyone claim to be absolutely right based on limited, inconclusive evidence. We should all think and theorize. And most important, not hate. Isn’t there enough hate already? Y’all have have a good time making fun of me. LOL !!!
Peace.
Rob
I think we can probably all agree that Diet Coke exists. I don’t think it’s a good analogy to compare a mythological being to a tangible item you can buy in a vending machine.
-headdesk-
How many people just don’t get it?
Jesus never tasted that great either. I never understood what the big deal was. I mean, Jesus is god, and god endowed us with tastebuds, why not taste great? But then, if he tasted good, that would be a pleasure, and pleasure is inherently sinful. Although the schmuck gave us the ability to enjoy things.
God(a really long time ago): “Yeah, so there are going to be a lot of things in life that feel really, really good when you do them. I made you that way on purpose, but don’t worry about why too much. JUST DON’T DO THEM! If you do, I know a guy who can do some really nasty shit to you for a really long time.”
God (also a really long time ago): “Oh, and I wasn’t ever going to mention this, but since you’re my special little guy, I will. I gave all y’all the power to really think critically about things. So if you really look around you in an objective manner, you’ll find an unholy shitload of discrepancies with the bible. Those discrepancies are there to test you, and make sure you stay stupid enough to worship me faithfully.”
God (right before Jesus came): “I changed my omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent mind about things. I want to try a new, softer approach. There’s this woman named Mary who’s gonna get knocked up after giving a sloppy hand job to a Roman soldier and scratching her crotch before washing her hand. She’ll pawn the whole thing off as a virgin birth, and what the hell, I’ll give it to her on a technicality. Anyways, this baby’s name will be Jesus. He’s kinda my son, kinda me. kinda some mumbo-jumbo bullshit spirit thing. I haven’t really worked that out yet, so I’ll just let the whole thing flap in the proverbial wind. Anyways, Jesus will preach about the softer side of Me, and then he’ll die before anyone really understands what the hell he was talking about. Then I’ll have some chick tell the rest of his apostles that he got resurrected. This will be way cooler than the truth, that she had a couple of soldiers take his corpse down to the dump and then wacked them before they could talk. After that, I’m outta here, off to work on a new project.”
I’m not out to bash anyone’s religion, it just comes across that way sometimes
I did originally think that about this site, but then I looked through the posts and came to realise that actually Pastafarians aren’t here to spread hate for religion. A lot of people on this site ARE majorly anti-religion or anti-Christian, but as a group we are just against people mixing religion and science and then making poorly-thought-outand badly punctuated arguments why we’re ALL GOING TO HEEEEELLLLLLLL!!!!!
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But thank you for dealing with this issue calmly and maturely, without EXCESSIVE CAPITALS or lack of any capitals at all. that is good. and nt spking lyke this. And thinking your argument through. And…-yadayada-
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@Cheeetar
1. That is the type of attitude that leads people to think that we’re just haters
2. ZE SAID that they are agnostic. Which means there is no “your god”
Mt. Dew helps me through hard times. Plus, it keeps me up late. =)
Well, Science has a hard-coded, dictionary definition that cannot be altered by some random person, or else that will be ruining the point of the practice. The FSM raises this awareness: that many (often religious) concept, such as God, doesn’t fall into the category of science. Science is something that can be PHYSICALLY observable, measurable, and/or provable/disprovable. Sometimes it takes the right technology to make something scientific. For example, psychology has not been considered “science” until quite recently, when we developed PET scans and such to measure brain activities to prove our point.
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On the issue whether God is science or not, ALL scientists agree that God is not observable, measurable, provable, nor disprovable. Evolution, on the other hand, CAN be observed, measured, and disproved (though many argue it can’t be proven. I would argue against this, but that’s for another time). This is why we believe Intelligent Design should not be taught in a science class: Intelligent Design is not science.
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Whether we believe God (or Gods; I’m polytheistic) exists is free for us to believe. Whether Intelligent Design is science or not is like saying whether a squirrel is a bird or not.
While I find your friend’s analogy iffy, the point still remains: Same difference. I don’t get all of the people that bash religion. It’s a different case when someone is a religious fanatic, spewing venom and preaching hellfire and brimstone. But for the people who practice their religion and don’t force it upon other people are cool with me. I think a lot of people turn to religion to find an answer that science cannot yet provide, and those questions are, more often than not, “why me” questions. I’m not sure about other religions, but I do know that a lot of Christians, when feeling overwhelmed, give their grief and pain to God when it burdens them. And if mentally, ritualistically or otherwise, giving your pain and grief up in order to move on and be more a more productive and positive member of society seems disturbing to someone simply because they unloaded on God, then the offended person needs to chill. On a side note, if you’re still stressed out and looking for something to fill the hole you’ve got eating away at you, may I suggest stepping back for a moment and not jumping from religion to religion to fill it. You need some alone time. Think. And then do something progressive.
Peace out.
I like your Diet Coke comparison, but probably for a different reason.
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I hate Diet Coke. Aspartame (formerly known as Nutrasweet™) tastes nothing like sugar & science has found that it causes cancer in rats. Most people who drink the stuff do so because they think it’ll help them lose weight or not gain any. I’ve seen people drink nothing but the stuff all day & then they wonder why they have so many health problems.
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Add to that the fact that you pay around $2 for a drink that costs around 20c to make (packaging included), and yes, Diet Coke portrays a rather accurate metaphoric representation for religion.
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St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Metaphor
In the case of ID, religion is hurting someone: all the children who are taught that objective scientific fact only applies if it coincides with their beliefs. Diet Coke contains artificial sweeteners which may or may not be carcinogens. E-mailing implies consent for posting; Bobby could even give us your name and E-mail, legally. Enjoy the soda, I prefer Mountain Dew, with a nice bowl of Ramen. RAmen.
The FSM has given me more heart and courage than any other non-human I can think of. That includes Thor, Zeus, God, Jesus, Buddha (although I kinda like him), or anyone the Scientologists or Wiccans look up to. That doesn’t mean I have contempt for those who are comforted by the various other gods. I just like His Noodly Appendages, that’s all, and I like it that He does not try to convert, kill or otherwise force others to worship Him. You seem like a nice person though, and I think you’ve just misunderstood the FSM’s mission.
> Recently at my college, a spoken word artist performed. He
> was also agnostic, and one poem he wrote in particular spoke
> to me. He compared God to Diet Coke, saying that Diet Coke
> helps him get through the hard times in the same way that
> God helps others. So why take that away from people?
Oh my goodness that is just TOO funny!