Hindu questions about FSM

Some Questions sent by Ram. I am putting it in this section just because I want to (maybe you guys can help me answer his questions):

Iam a student. Iam from india. I am a Hindu. I am quite happy with my religion and respect all other religons. But your Spaghetti monster? I don’t understand. i visited your website, but it says so little of your religion.

i want to know the foolowing things?

What or Who is this Spaghetti monster?

What is this monster up to? what does he want? (according to you)

How did he contact you?

Does he Talk?

Do you have any proof? if show please show me.

Why do you use ‘ironic words’? Preachers don’t really use such words. they are polite and atleast sound enlightened one. you sound more like a minister demanding for votes.

This monster of yours is made of pasta?

Is this monster a good monster or is he spreading evil?

Why a pirate ship? pirates do have 99.9 % dna similar to humans. well, my great great grand father had 99.999999% DNA similar to humans. so what? What i mean to ask is Pirates were evils, they plundered and killed. if at all they are extinct today. it is cool. with time they will. everything will. But why pirates . Why?

I believe in God, sir and i have no intentions in hurting you, but it is silly to believe in what is not so clear. I don’t really believe in scientific evidences, but yes i do have my own way of finidng things out. some sort of spirituality involved.
Coincidently, Indian lores have many written records of universal birth that resembles to big bang theory. they have perfect calculations of earth’s rev. and rot. all this was written more than a thousands years which also includes physics, maths, geo, medicine and spirituality. But there is no mention of Your monster. you know and the world knows Hindus have the longest written history and records than any one else. Not even eygptians. And all of them are accurate till date, some are under research. American scientist have also discovered a man-made birdge dated thousands of yrs ago called ram-sethu (in india) which also has written records in ancient books, including the man who built it. if it is all this. How come they miss your monster?

Iam not preaching my religion Sir. please answer my question. i shall me thankful to you as my questions haunt me than the ghosts? Ghosts? don’t dont haunt me at all !

God bless you

Ram
Goa
India