I read your web site and I am very concerned about something. I consider myself a good Christian and I have read the Bible many times (not like some of the so-called Christians people who post to your web site and just yell and say stupid things). So I am familiar with most parts of the Bible but in no place that I have seen is there any reference to pasta or a being that resembles your flying spaghetti monster. God created man, and man created pasta, but if it was any different than that there would be a reference in the Bible. So I am worried that perhaps your religion is not based on real evidence that God wrote. Please feel free to write back to me and I will be glad to discuss this with you if you like.
God bless,
Cinta
He, it’s back? This is an old mail isn’t it?
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Umm…
Hate to break it to you, but we use a different book. http://www.amazon.com/Gospel-Flying-Spaghetti-Monster/dp/0812976568/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-4154766-0516656?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1192436807&sr=8-1
-Avatar of Reason
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Yes, avatar, our evidence is based on things written by our prophet as dictated by the FSM. Not some puny god.
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But,but,but… There is nothing there can be nothing, nothing, nothing I tell you that is not in the bible!!! GET OUT OF THAT CAR!!! There are no cars in the bible! (Slowly munches on a big bowl of Christ chex, letting her pentacle jangle loudly on the side with each yummy bite) I think I’ll go get me some Pasta next, and a Beer! RAmen!
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Wench Cyka
Practicing to be a Saguaro Cactus Tonight
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I have heard of, and of course, eaten pasta but this thing you call the ‘bible’ is a complete mystery to me. I’m assuming it’s a book as you refer to reading it ?
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“So I am worried that perhaps your religion is not based on real evidence that God wrote.”
Sorry but I think you’ll find this statment is an oxymoron.
If you don’t know what that is read a dictionary. I know god didn’t write it but give it a try anyway.
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Old.
I think this one just proves that all fundies are stuck in an eternal loop of logical paradoxes, oxymorons and fallacies.
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@ Cyka I don’t know what a Saguaro cactus is, but I’m sure you’ll make a very beautiful one.
Hate to sound cynical, but how much practice can it take?
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Saguaro cactus? Isn’t that one of the ones that get you tripping off you tits?
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God wrote the Bible? WTF?! This person is fucking delusional!
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The bible was written by a bunch of grumpy misogynistic nasty old men!!!
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Dear Cinta,
I’m sorry to have to break some bad news to you, but the holey bibble was not written by the judeo-xian god.
It was written by Eris, the goddess of discord, chaos and confusion for the express purpose of screwing with people’s heads.
To discover The Truth in all its Noodliness, read The Gospel Of The Flying Spaghetti Monster (Parmesan Be Upon Him), available from this website, and all good bookshops.
Yarrrr!
Mysturji
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Hi Red :)
Had no access for few days due to storm damage :( Monsoons have just arrived here.
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“He, it’s back? This is an old mail isn’t it?”
Either that or it’s a post off one of the threads. But yeah, sure I’ve seen a thread headed by this one. May have been bought up again just recently too. Too much to catch up on to check at the mo. Bloody phone company!!! @%*#@
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Um, I’m afraid to tell you Cinta, but the Bible was written five hundred years after Jesus supposedly died. And also, what is there to disprove that FSM made us think that pasta was invented by man, after man? You can’t disprove our religion as much as we can’t disprove yours. But FSM is our god. ANd I find that entire article incredibly rude.
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The Saguaro cactus is the one the stupid teenage boys end up trying to make out with in the desert when they decide to do something brilliant like add a hallucinogen to that dangerous coctail of hormones they already have running through their systems, vaguely shaped like a human with it’s arms in the air. Just thought I’d have some fun and be a little extra prickly tonight. I have never tripped over a breast yet. Fortunately, gravity has yet to be quite that cruel. Even sans bra, I still do not have to move a breast aside to scratch a knee. May the FSM have mercy on my body in heaven! Or one heck of a Bodice Shop!
Rar!
Wench Cyka
Currently Under Construction
No Peeking Until 10K Situps!
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His Noodliness is described quite clearly in the Gospel. http://www.amazon.com/Gospel-Flying-Spaghetti-Monster/dp/0812976568/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-4154766-0516656?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1192436807&sr=8-1
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If god wrote the Bible why isn’t it in the first person? Or how about like ‘the Secret Diary of Adrian Mole’;
Saturday: Got bored today so I created man. He got bored so I created woman. They got bored with each other so I created Divorce courts.
Sunday: Had big zit on my nose, so I spent the day in bed playing Tekken and having the occasional one off the wrist.
Note to self: On Monday must create porn!
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March 25th 1 BC.
Mary finally put out! Haven’t created condoms yet and now have a strange rash! Hope nothing else bad comes of it?
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@ Wench Cyka- Give it time.
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@ Pluto
NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
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It’s the same as this one, posted May the 5th of this year:
http://www.venganza.org/2007/05/13/i-am-very-concerned-about-something.htm
The original had some ASCII trouble, it seems: the replica reads more easily.
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@ Wench Cyka
Modern medicine can work wonders these days. When the time comes just empty 2 big syringes of Bo-Tox in the twins and no one will ever know. If you do this keep your boobs away from naked flames! They’d be as crispy as a KFC before you knew what hit you.
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I like what use guys do but most of the time, you just bring up crap. You love to make comments on people’s hate mail, fair enough its their fault for caring about your pitiful cult. No matter I am sure that your Spag monster will satisfy your pitiful sad lives.
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God did not write the Bible. Men did.
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“So I am worried that perhaps your religion is not based on real evidence that God wrote” So you believe in centaurs and dragons and unicorns then.
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@Reflector Oct 15th, 2007 at 5:14 am: “…No matter I am sure that your Spag monster will satisfy your pitiful sad lives.”
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Help! This concerned poster saw right through my disguise, and now everybody knows I’m leading a miserable life! Quick, some grog. Or rum. Or chocolate!
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Your a sad sad person jean. I like it though how you like to invest your time in this…. What do you call this again?
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“God created man, and man created pasta, but if it was any different than that there would be a reference in the Bible.”
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There is no reference in the Bible to either man creating pasta, or pasta in general. Does this mean that pasta doesn’t really exist?
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St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Logical Dilemmas
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@Reflector
I would call it a rainy day activity, what I do instead of a fag brake at work.
It’s actually a parody religion, but you display the normal ignorance we get from hate mailers who can’t be asked to read the ‘about’ section of the site.
It might be an idea to actually know what you’re talking about before commenting on something. That way you don’t look stupid.
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I have read Greek Mythology many times, and it concerns me there is no mention of this “God” you speak of. If your God was a god, I would figure it would have been mentioned in the official Roman list of Gods and Goddesses.
You are not mentioned in the Bible, and that is how we know you are actually real.
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Your Bible(pronounced with a short “i” for comedic effect) is merely yet another souped up book of astrology myths, of course it would make no mention of the one, real, Noodly Creator. They put this “god” character in their as a place keeper because they did not yet know the the Flying Spaghetti Monster. It’s not even a particularly good astrology book; too much fluff. Greek tales are far more reliable. WE, however, refer to a more accurate, spiritual gospel.
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Hey, I am also concerned about something…
How did Noah managed to put all those animals in a boat?
How was the son of Adam (the one that killed his brother) judged by other people if they were the only people on earth?
Where are the dinosaurs in the bible?
What happened to Jebus between the age of 13 and 33?
Who drank my beer at the bar?
Where did I leave my condoms?
Did I take my anti-baby pills this morning?
For the lobe Einstein! I am concerned today
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@PacificPam- Here’s my feeble attempt at an answer, I’ll use the christen method.
Q. How did Noah managed to put all those animals in a boat?
A. Don’t question god or the Bible, or you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
Q. How was the son of Adam (the one that killed his brother) judged by other people if they were the only people on earth?
A. Don’t question god or the Bible, or you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
Q. Where are the dinosaurs in the bible?
A. Don’t question god or the Bible, or you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
Q. What happened to Jebus between the age of 13 and 33?
A. Don’t question god or the Bible, or you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
Q. Who drank my beer at the bar?
A. Satan! Don’t question god or the Bible, or you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
Where did I leave my condoms?
A. As stated by the Catholic Church: God dose not approve of contraception. As he is the creator of everything and totally infallible, contraceptives can’t exist! Don’t question god or the Bible, or you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
Q. Did I take my anti-baby pills this morning?
A. As stated by the Catholic Church: God dose not approve of contraception. As he is the creator of everything and totally infallible, contraceptives can’t exist! Don’t question god or the Bible, or you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
Q. For the lobe Einstein! I am concerned today
A. Only if you feel the Lords Love. If not you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
Hope that clarified things for you.
P.S Don’t question god or the Bible, or you will burn in eternal hell fire!!!
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Hey! I wanna take a crack at the Jebus one! He went to Tibet and learned some magic tricks!
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@ Pacific Pam
(belch)
there was some funny guy in a robe who came in by talking about how everybody needed to get a glass of water for his next act…
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@ Jean Bart
(grumble) *passes a bar of seriously dark chocolate over*
Be careful with that now, it’s only for hardened chocoholics in anything but the smallest of nibbles!
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@ Pacific Pam – “Hey, I am also concerned about something…
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1. How did Noah managed to put all those animals in a boat? This is such an easy answer, I’m surprised you even have to ask. They started with the oliphants…they ate the rhinos, the rhinos ate the lions, the lions ate the zebras, the zebras ate the koala bears etc. Then when the floods abated, everyone reguritated their inmates. The the boat captain, sailed around the world and returned all the South American tree frogs to South America, the kangaroos back to Australia etc. (Even though, those places hadn’t even been discovered yet. Ain’t god good!
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2. How was the son of Adam (the one that killed his brother) judged by other people if they were the only people on earth? Wow, another easy one. The bible fails to clarify it because it doesn’t want to associate itself with the lower riff-raff of the trailer park world. God actually created Melvin and Edna first, but they were kinda like the red-necks of the human race and he decided to try again until he got it right. He gave each the nod to get the hell out of Kansas…I mean Eden, until he got it right. So when you see that Adam was the first dude created it really means the first one that god got right. So when Cain ran away to the land of Nod…
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3. Where are the dinosaurs in the bible? Inside the animials on the Ark…how do you think they last the whole year without food? Someone had to die.
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4. What happened to Jebus between the age of 13 and 33? Lets just say he was pretty busy between 25 and 32 trying to work spells to remove all the hair from his palms. Nudge, nudge, say no more…
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5. Who drank my beer at the bar? Shit, was that your grog…sorry.
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6. Where did I leave my condoms? Condoms, why you blasphemous wench, don’t you know that every sperm is sacred? Next thing you know you will be taking birth control pills!
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7. Did I take my anti-baby pills this morning? See what did I tell you! May you burn in eternal hell fire for eternity. The job of every woman on earth is to bring forth more miniature fundies so they can be raised up to be all growed up fundies, who can then go out and multiply and write more hate mail. (Whoops, did I say multiply? Based on some of the posts, maybe they should start out with easy addition and subtraction first.)
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@Pluto – sorry but it is driving me crazy. Dose means a dose of medicine or a dose of the clap. Does is the word you are looking for.
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Iron Bess – I understand that you are a hardened atheist.
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The Bible literalist has to be the worst representative of the over all christian religion. I look at the stories of Jesus in the Bible. These stories are examples to be used as a guide in life. It is an old document, but don’t kill people, don’t steal, love each other, and many other core teachings still hold true.
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“real evidence that God wrote”
um yeah isnt the bible supposed to be an account of things that happened and God’s words all recorded by man? so even if we assume(danger!) that there is a God in the Christian sense, the person/people that wrote the bible could have gotten it wrong, right?
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@Celosia – The Bible is a documentation of an old oral history. Whisper down the lane does apply. Just another reason not to be a literalist.
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@Christ4all – So if you don’t take the bible literally, why do you use it at all? Who says which parts of the bible are right or wrong? In your religion and your world, who gets to choose? You or some pulpit spewing bureaucrat?
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Mankind doesn’t need another fairy tale to guide it. When I was a child my mother told me not to lie, to play nice and not to run with scissors. Just because the scissor thing isn’t in the bible, is it any less wrong then the others?
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My point, is that a lot of practical and life enhancing advise and values have come from other sources that were never written in any so-called holy book(s) but have been adopted by people as valuable to their every day existence. Don’t step in front of a moving bus. Don’t play Russian roulette. Brush your teeth every day. So why in the world would we need a bible to tell us how to live life properly? Not only that, but a book which cannot be taken literally, even by believers. A book that is archaic, a book which is contradictory and a book which is has some pretty horrendous (and might I add, god approved) murders and tortures.
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When I was in school and we were taking math, our textbooks actually were written with the idea that all of the information would be and was useful. So when talking about the bible, why would you write a book, which is meant to be the guideline for all of mankind, in such a bizarre, ambiguous, and peculiar way? If it was extremely important for your god = sky fairy that all people follow only his teachings, wouldn’t you think (s)he would make it crystal clear, believable and filled with such proofs that only an idiot would argue against it?
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If your sky fairy wants to win the battle against satan and his minions, wouldn’t he actually try? Because even lowly little me, while working as a paramedic and taking care of pedofiles, crack addicts or murderers, made sure that I did not make the suffering of the individual worse.
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Your bible, almost guarantees that there will be vast numbers of people who will question it, who will not believe in it. and in fact. will try to ensure that their children do not get sucked into it. Thus allowing millions of people to suffer unbearably in your lake of fire and torture forever and ever amen.
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@Iron Bess- Sorry I’m too dependant on my spell checker.
I am a drunken dyslexic so pleas don’t mock my beliefs.
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Do not question Pluto or his shitty spelling or you burn in eternal hell fire!!!
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@Christ4All-sorry mate, but all that shit in the Old Testament and all the shit done since Jesus cancel out the work of a single pacifist. Plus he did throw a temper tantrum in a temple if I recall.
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@Iron Bess & Christ4All-
I’ve herd the argument that parts of the bible should not be taken literally! But, as Bess pointed out, who decides which bits are symbolic and which are real. Couldn’t God (the first time I ever wrote that with a capital G) just be a metaphor for manes struggle to find himself? More likely it was written by people who wanted to explain the world but couldn’t so use the nearest comparison: they could create things so someone bigger created the bigger things. Religion may be the opium of the masses but it started as the science of the ignorant and to me that’s all it will ever be. A debunked theory.
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Iron Bess – I agree that not all people who profess to be “called by God” are in fact called.
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To be honest with you Iron Bess, I choose. I look at what is written and try an interpert a message or moral of the story. My general impression of the New Testament is that we should love each other and try to live in peace.
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The Old Testament was basically lifted from the Jews. I don’t speak hebrew, so I am not sure how closely it was translated.
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I do not profess to know God’s plan. I do not know why God has not more public about things. The FSM has not exactly been appearing, either.
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Iron Bess – the Gospel of the FSM falls into the same category. I had to ask the attendant where is was because I could not find it. Your book is in the humor section. I think that is unfair.
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@Pluto – the moral to the trashing of the temple is that everyone has a breaking point. You recognize when it is time to leave and let something go.
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Hey christ4all, if all christianity is all about is “but don’t kill people, don’t steal, love each other” then why bother picking fights with people that agree with that. Most Atheists/Agnostics have very similar ethics and I’m sure that if you read the “eight I’d Really Rather You Didn’t s”, you would agree that Pastafarianism isn’t all that different either.
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@crist4all – I agree with Pluto. Religion, faith and a belief in magical invisible dieties has seen its day. In today’s world, where science can explain a lot of phenomena which ancient man could not, it becomes evident that ALL religious teachings should be regulated to the Humour Section, or at the very least, Mythology.
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Religion is an organized group of deluded individuals. The only people who actually have it right are the televangelists and scientologists. Obviously they could give a rat’s ass about religion, they are out to exploit the masses for the money.
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The only thing that religion is all about, and ever was about, is control. I can imagine what the first individual to realize the power that the hocus pocus of religion did for him/her was almost overwhelming. Control and power over the masses…euphoria! Give me your best food, your money, your livestock, your land, your women and I will give you my blessing so when you die you will continue to live and be happy ever after. It is the greatest of all scams. No one can ever come back from the dead and tell the people the truth. I think we call it the best of all the Matchstick Mens swindles.
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Dear Cinta,
…
Yes, I must stress the ellipses!
That email is going to make me cry. Never before have I seen someone who completely missed the point more. Sorry if our non-christian religion isn’t supported by your religious documentation, maybe you should get the sequel to the bible, the one called “Alright, the Bible was fiction but I can see that none of you understood that…”
RAmen
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@christ4all
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If all you’re taking from the Bible is the peace and such, why not ditch it for a text with similar values, but none of the horrendous violence or blatant contradictions? Try Buddhism.
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Now that you are clearing up some concerns…I have one more…
Does Christ4all knows that this site is about satire?
Has Christ4all read the letter?
Where are my tampons?
dammit!
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I meant a few more…no, actually I meant one more and then realized that I had more that one concern and I forgot to rewrite that part.
May the noodly one touch you where you like the most!
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@PP – ???
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Nice 2 see the biblical massage… sorry, message being spread again 2all: 14all, all41, as the 3 musketeers used 2 say…
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So… ur saying God literally picked up a pen (or a chisel) and wrote the bible? Last time I checked no one really knew who exactly wrote the bible, so they might have just been misinformed, it’s no biggie really, as long as people admit that maybe is isn’t unquestionable.
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I don’t know Iron Bess…I have had too much coffee today to not be as random as I am today.
can you clear my doubt?
By the way, Pluto…if you take the “l” of your names is says “Puto” which is man-whore in spanish. I figured that out by myself.
Shit I have to stop drinking coffee.
I don’t want to go to hell, unless you have really hot nerdy guys that will be willing to do nice stuff for me. Then, I would like to go to hell.
(Chicken)Ramen
Pacific Pam
(always saying random stuff)
And may your sauce always taste like something you like
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@Iron Bess
Which one? :D
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What happen to the spaces between lines?
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I just wanted to see three PPs in arow.
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Pixel…I think we are two now…PP’s…two of us..two PP’s in the site
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@christ4all-
“…the moral to the trashing of the temple is that everyone has a breaking point. You recognize when it is time to leave and let something go.”
Listen mate don’t take it personally, because you do sound like you are a good person, but that’s a crock of shit.
Sorry but if you can say that for Jesus you can say it of the Columbine shootings in the US. Those kid were bullied to braking point, does that justify killing?
Here in England over 10 years ago we had the Dunblane massacre, where a man, gone past his breaking point, shoots up a class room full of infants. Where is the moral there?
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@PacificPam “By the way, Pluto…if you take the “l” of your names is says “Puto” which is man-whore in spanish.” Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
Or is it just a thing?
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wow….dont you know that FSM created this “God” to test us?!?
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Just wanted to note, the PP’s are getting thick in here! Feeling a surge of estrogen….. What’s a good wench to do with so much PP and so little time! (sorry about that, but somebody had to go there!)
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@x4all
.
I really do not want your spiritual wasteland of ancient legends and dusty manuscripts. I don’t need them. I especially am not interested in adopting the view, so necessary for people to believe such nonsence, that faith is a virtue. To my mind that is antispiritual.
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Man-whore sounds just fine to me, so long as he is good at his craft, smells really good, and knows either when to leave in the morning, or how to fix a good breakfast! ;D
Wench Cyka
Female Chauvanist Pig
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@ Wench Cyka
Just had a bath.
Never had any complaints.
I do a mean full English
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Logan the Grog Keeper Oct 15th, 2007 at 2:53 pm
“So… ur saying God literally picked up a pen (or a chisel) and wrote the bible?”
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Wouldn’t that be a magic marker?
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Wench Cyka Oct 15th, 2007 at 3:33 pm
“so long as he is good at his craft, smells really good, and knows either when to leave in the morning, or how to fix a good breakfast!
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Can I have his number when you finish with it? If you don’t finish him that is :p
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I consider my self a Pastafarian. (I used to hate eating pasta, since its so very without taste, but since its now a religious experience I always finish my plate)
I have tried to spread the gospel in Denmark, and its slightly harder than I had expected. Probably because we almost have the church and state seperated, and ID is no where near as widespread and organised as in the US. But, people do like the idea behind it though.
But, I must confess that I do believe in an “Omnipotent something.”
I do believe man was created by this “being”, but as a result of evolution and natural boundaries, such as gravity, as “god” (in lack of a better word) have devised. Being Omnipotent and all knowing, it would know what the result would be. (I am not entirely sure IT is even sentient.)
Exactly what the reasoning was behind it all, is way beyond me. The problem with religions in general, is that people claim to know their chosen gods wishes and needs… If said gods are so all knowing and all powerful, who the heck are they to claim that they (or man in general) with all their flaws are even cabable of grasping their intents.
So, if all else fails, retrace your steps. The very first organisms had one purpose, to multiply, and this is the single one purpose that is consistent throughout history, for every race.
So, basicly, I think its all about reproduction and evolving as a species.
Pretty simple of course, I dont want to waste time getting into the part about constructive energy and destructive energy.
PS. One thing, I do think we as Pastafarians should be careful about religion bashing. The way I understand FSMism, is that its VERY tolerant, so if people want to believe in something, even if you find it stupid, let them.
Troels Nysted Jensen
Pastafarian, Denmark
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@Troels Nysted Jensen – “One thing, I do think we as Pastafarians should be careful about religion bashing. The way I understand FSMism, is that its VERY tolerant, so if people want to believe in something, even if you find it stupid, let them.”
I personally don’t enjoy bashing anyone. It just isn’t my thing. However, some people—including Pastafarians—like to bash. The FSM is tolerant, and he teaches tolerance, he supports tolerance. But, that’s just it, he’s tolerant…even tolerant of intolerant behavior, as long as it doesn’t get too bad. And it often does. But online bashing—being online and all, involving written words only—doesn’t hurt anyone.
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@ Aristotle – But online bashing—being online and all, involving written words only—doesn’t hurt anyone.
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I must disagree on that one, seeing as after reading all 67 comments my eyes hurt a little.
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However, nothing Pasta cant cure.
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RAmen
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@Troels Nysted Jensen – “I must disagree on that one, seeing as after reading all 67 comments my eyes hurt a little.”
I stand corrected. :)
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@PacificPam
Then I’ll adopt you. You shall hereby be PP III, the newest member of those in the church whose initials are PP, and oddly the first one whose name wasn’t Pete.
RAmen
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@ Fred Anon
I make absolutely no promises!
Yarrr!
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I also put the lid down. Does that make me the perfect man?
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WC..are you implying that PP is a girl? Isn’t Pete the name of a man…
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Pluto…it depends if you are a good man-whore or not! Can you marry me Puto? sorry, Pluto (i’m discrestic)
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Can I be PPP? My middle name is with P also.
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May the Noodly One keep bringing PP’s to the Church
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I don’t do wet-sex and I noticed you have an obsession with PP.
Plus I don’t know what you look like; you might even be a man for all I know!
If you past the visual, medical and psychological test I may be inclined to say yes. It would depend on the size of the rock on my ring (engagement or anus I’m not picky)
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He I have an idea.
Maybe instead of posting the hate mail here
It should just be delete it and forgotten about.
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I am not a man! No!
I am not obesessed with PP…just with something else…
Visual…do you like latinas?
Psycological…My mom told me I was crazy but I think it is because I got too many tattos.
Medical…I get a PAP test every six months…
Should’t be me the one concerned for the size of the rock on MY ring?
.
@Reflector…stop reflecting your lack of ability to think by yourself. Open a bank account where you can receive donations so you can get a brand new brain…and not only buy it…use it.
And of course our religion is not based on evidence Dog wrote. it is based on evidence FSM told men to write. FSM doesn’t write cuz he is too busy convincing PLuto to marry me, and also creating the prefect heaven with million of liters of beers erupting from the millions of volcanos, and preparing people to take care of the stripper factory. That is why we, men, wrote the evidence
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Not the FSM.
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@PacificPam-
No you asked me I get the ring.
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oh…I’ll give you the ring, then
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Pacific Pam – you are peeing all over yourself.
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The Gospel of the FSM was written by a man.
.
Pacific Pam may be you could get a man if you believed in something.
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Yeah, maybe thats the solution, convert to… well anything.
.
As long as its orthodox and conservative enough, you might even get it arranged for you.
.
I don’t think that a lack faith has much to do with finding a life partner… Hey, my GF happens to be a good Protestant (by danish standards).
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“Pacific Pam may be you could get a man if you believed in something.”
Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t she believe in the FSM (clearly something)?
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@4Christsake (aka Christ4All)
“Pacific Pam may be you could get a man if you believed in something.”
That’s very Christian of you.
.
“We must question the story logic of having an all-knowing all-powerful God, who creates faulty Humans, and then blames them for his own mistakes”- Gene Roddenberry
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I’ve got a man – and I believe in lots of stuff ;D
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@Lance Oct 16th, 2007 at 9:39 am: “He I have an idea. Maybe instead of posting the hate mail here It should just be delete it and forgotten about.”
.
I’m afraid that after one more cunning plan like this one our screens will crack…
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May I mention that my initials are PP?
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@Pluto – I am worried for PacificPam’s happiness. Did you give her the ring yet?
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@4Christsake (aka Christ4All)
“I am worried for PacificPam’s happiness. Did you give her the ring yet?”
That’s very Christian of you.
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I have plenty of good friends that are Christian. And from what I’ve learned… All Gods are one in the same, and it does not really matter how you choose to think of him. Ya know… since it is not supposed to have a physical body and everything. S’long as you respect hir and be good, she’s happy, I’m sure.
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@ 4Christsake (aka Christ4All)
“@Pluto – I am worried for PacificPam’s happiness. Did you give her the ring yet?”
Look I know you’re a traditionalist, but she asked me! I get HER ring! And possible a few other choice parts.
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@Pluto – Good point.
.
Although I would be worried.
“PacificPam
Oct 16th, 2007 at 11:01 am
I am not a man!”
Sounds like she has said that more than once.
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Sorry PacificPam, that was mean and out of context. You guys must be rubbing off my skin.
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One of us!
One of us!
Google-gagle!
Google-gagle!
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@4Xsake – I take acception to that comment, that your being mean is because we are rubbing off on you. Who here has been mean to you? Who here has been mean to anyone else?
.
Yes we are an opinionated lot, we have strong feelings about things, and just because we voice those opinions, doesn’t make us mean. Lobbing insults, lobbing hand grenades and lopping off heads, would. But as far as I know, no one here does, or is interested in, doing any of those things.
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I mean exception to it…pardon my grammar
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Hey…Nah, it is not worth it.
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Not having a good day here…
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May the noodly one tickle you so you can all laugh
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ooooooooh! i got the comment No. 100!
Do I get some sort of prize?
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You already have every think you’ll ever need babe
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hmm… god created man and man created pasta? On the contrary, Moryarti,(is that spellt right?) but it was exactly the other way around. Pasta created man and man created god
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I do?
Can you let me know what it is?
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I would really appreciate it =)
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By the way, that sounded really hot
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It’s you sparkling personality and good taste in puto
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May the Noodly one keep you posting sexy stuff.
I had Maccaroni and cheese today!
I will dress as a sexy pirate for this hallowee and will send you pictures of Panama and my friends and I…so you can get to know a little bit more of my country!
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Like that you will have a reference, Pluto.
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i give you points for being polite but we don’t follow the bible, we dollow the gospel of the FSM
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And theres no mention of you or me in our bible or yours, but were here arent we?
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The stupidity of the poster is funy he seems unable to understand that there may be another religion that doesn’t follow the same “mould” as the bible does.
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I think this is old. When I read this, I felt like it was ground hog’s day (i.e., the movie).
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@PacificPam- Remember hot pants + fish net stockings and suspenders are essential pirate regalia.
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Fish net stockings Pluto? Oh dear! Bet you like them black or red too. ;)
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Fuck…where did i put my fish nets?
Do I also need a hat?
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@Wench Nikkiee- Are there any other colours?
@PacificPam- ok, just the hot pant, fish nets, suspenders and a hat.
Nothing else is needed at all!
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Boots, Pluto – you can’t be a pirate without boots!
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BOOTS!
Should I get them online?
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I got mine from Ebay – fabulously sexy!
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Ok boots too then. But you’re becoming dangerously over dressed here
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All the more fun to take off Pluto!
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I’m an impatient man
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I originally miss spelt impatient and the spell check gave me… well lets just say it wouldn’t have been flattering to me. Good thing I checked!
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Learn to relish the anticipation!
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@Booty- anticipation!? I’m twenty six and folks on both sides of my family rarely make it to seventy without a hart attack, stroke or bowel cancer! I’ve used a third of my useful life expectancy. And now they expect me to work till I’m seventy too? I’m on borrowed time, the fast track to oblivion! No time to fuck around!
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@Pluto. Don’t take off the boots, then. 26? nice
@Booty. Did they fit you well? were they for bidding?
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It’s like a late night adult chat-line up in here.
You guys paying by the minute?
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@the Nope. Nope, it is for free.
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@PacificPam Oct 18th, 2007 at 11:02 am
“@Pluto. Don’t take off the boots, then. 26? Nice”
You can keep the hat on too.
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hahahahahahahahahahahaha
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@PacificPam- Mind if I ask you something? What do you think I look like? I’m interested with how you pitcher me in your mind. I’ve got one of you in mine, complete with hot pants and fish nets!
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Pluto, you can write me if you want… panama.pamela@yahoo.com
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Umm, I’m sorry, I’m kind of confused. Isn’t that what this is supposed to be a religion. Why would FSM be in the Christian bible or any other bible to begin with? THIS IS A RELIGION, you don’t see any other Gods in the Christian bible.
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So easy: FSM is allpowerful , allmighty GOD! Why must he write anything? He ain’t afected by what people believe. The Christians God on the other hand is dependant on people’s belief. If they don’t belive in him he won’t exist.
p.s. I realy shouldn’t read that much Terry Prachet. Anyone else a fan of him.
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I like George Orwell
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Gabranth – yeah, a few Pratchett fans here. I’ve just finished “Making Money” have you read it yet?
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If the iontolerant people would have real brick heads, instead of only fosilized gray matter and dogma papier mache filling in the cranium, they could be more constructive: a library could be build up with them.
.C.
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Yeah, but then they’d burn all the books inside it… so really you’d just have a crematorium.
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I love it, “you are wrong because this is not in my religion’s book” hello lady we’re not part of your religion, dont belittle me!
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That is because he intended for your religion to not see him. *rolls eyes*
Let’s talk to this god. We should get somebody to talk to him. And, (since he’s god, the creator of all things) He’s got a computer and internet, right? We should get a YouTube video of him showing us how he created the earth.
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…
Why isn’t this hate-mail writer dead because she forgot to breathe? I mean honestly, if you write something THIS stupid…
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I read your web site and I am very concerned about something. I consider myself a good Christian and I have read the Bible many times (not like some of the so-called Christians people who post to your web site and just yell and say stupid things). So I am familiar with most parts of the Bible but in no place that I have seen is there any reference to pasta or a being that resembles your flying spaghetti monster. God created man, and man created pasta, but if it was any different than that there would be a reference in the Bible. So I am worried that perhaps your religion is not based on real evidence that God wrote. Please feel free to write back to me and I will be glad to discuss this with you if you like.
God bless,
Cinta
well that is because the bible is full of the lies of a bunch of potheads. the great fsm is real god is not. you see since the beginning of time a being called the flying spaghetti monster has roamed the universe. he created the mountains, the trees, pornography, and midgets.
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dear cinta i see no way that your religion is any more logical than ours, if there is no refereance in your bible to our god but then again what other gods are refferenced and to be honest it is a just about as logical to state that we were made by pasta as it is to say that we were made by a wizard who lizes in the clouds. and to the chronology of pasta the everyone refers to the noodly lord made us not in his image but in a lesser form because he couldnt be bothered to do all the fiddly bits of his perfect form, he then realised that there was no reference to him in the world he created and there for made pasta that resembaled him and at the same time kept his decsiples happy with food
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Hi Cinta-
Define “Evidence”.
Firstly, I would like to point out that your religion is based on religious evidence.
At least in the UK, your theories of creationism will be taught in Religious Education lessons.
Darwin’s theories are based on Scientific evidence.
They will be taught in science lessons.
Secondly, the Bible avoids many issues- be it pasta, abortion or energy saving light bulbs. Oh wait- abortion and energy saving light bulbs didn’t exist when the bible was written. Neither did pasta. If god was made of pasta, none of the bible writers would have mentioned it.
Also, your claim that “perhaps your religion is not based on real evidence that God wrote” not only assumes that for evidence to be real god has to have written it(incidentally God did NOT write the bible), but YOU are equally determined to disprove the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster as they are to disprove Christianity. They have a gospel. You have the bible.
What makes yours so much better than theirs?
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I love Ollie!
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Cŵn Annwn- I beleive it’s spelt “midgits”. Check the diagram.
And PacificPam, I love you too!
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@mentos
…
Shouldn’t all fundies be dead from not breathing? I don’t think anything in the Bible says ‘thou shalt breathe’. And, of course, if God doesn’t say you should do it…
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Oh yeah. And I reread the original message, and I’d like to point out that reading the Bible doesn’t make you Christian at all. I mean, I’ve read the Bible cover to cover, and I haven’t been Christian since I was seven.
For anyone who wants to read it, a word of advice; all the exciting adventure stories are in the Old Testament. Revelations is good, too.
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@Teh Spag-worshipper-
You read the ENTRIE bible?!
Wow, nice one. How long did that take?
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@Cap’n Ollie
On and off? About three years. I don’t know how long it /actually/ took me, since
a. I was also reading a marine biology textbook, a mythology book, and about fifty novels at the same time. And that’s a conservative estimate. I’m really shite at sticking to one thing for any length of time.
And
b. I was eleven.
I started reading it when I was about eight because I wanted to see if there was anything in it that could redeem Xtianity from four years of sitting on hard wood floors and listening to a priest. Oh yes, and going to church every so often, sitting on hard wood benches and listening to two priests.
Turns out that no, there isn’t. Good mythology in parts, though.
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It’s all well and good to take your belief from the written word; I myself am fond of Dr. Seuss and Nietzsche. They don’t really work in harmony but with a little “faith” they are interchangeable. Gods and FSMs don’t write books, people do. People also believe anything as evidenced by the many people who quote books they claim were written by invisible men.
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Can you honestly say that you believe every world of the bible is true? In one part of the bible, it says that slaves should respect their masters as they would Christ. In another part, it says that you should stone unruly children. Different copies of the bible even contradict each other. In some, it says that before God created the world, it was endless ocean. In others, it says a desert. Evangelical Christians even try to validate the bible by quoting other parts of the bible! I’m not saying that none of the bible is true, just that a book written by humans trying to comprehend life, the universe, and everything (if you’ll excuse the Douglas Adams quote) over long periods of time, then edited by a roman emperor is bound to have at least a few inaccuracies.
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@Cinta
I can honestly say that I have tried to read the bible. I open it…*yawn* close it, then sleep. I usually get a good night’s rest from reading only a few lines. I believe I never got past the first page. I always wanted to see what all the hype was in reading this book that drives so many lives. Someday I may read it entirely…*yawn*…damn, always makes me sleepy even talking about it. Anyway, I find it difficult to follow something that people wrote in a time where anything was believable. (Man stands on rock in water..appears to be walking on water! *must write about his amazing feat!*) I’ve seen many interpretations of the same verse, so who is right? I grew up pretty much without religion, my mother was Buddhist and father was Protestant…of course both were non-practicing. I spent most of my early years bouncing around with friends from one church to the next, just because I slept over and they took me to church with them. *UGH* So, in my knowledge of the bible, which is little, and all the preachings I had to withstand…the FSM is my choice. A friend brought me here recently and I was touched by his noodlely appendage. May it touch you too.
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@Saucyballs
I think that the Bible is actually a pretty good book if you take it as just that – a book. Especially the Old Testament, as I’ve said ^^
On the other hand, if I handed in something like it for my English coursework, I’d probably lose marks by the dozen. I mean, clearly Jesus was either ignorant or a deranged psychopath, since he says that the same God who turned Lot’s wife into a pillar of salt (because she looked back when he demolished her town and killed all her friends and family. Terrible sin, that.) is a ‘merciful God’.
But if you take each book of the Bible as a seperate myth, they’re pretty good.
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Man I hate how people think that the bible is truth, and if its not in the bible, it cant be true. IT WAS WRITTEN BY A BUNCH OF CAVE-DWELLING JEWS!!!! The bible is not truth, it is a compilation of writings on events, and stories.
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Hmm… Pastafarianism is not true! I went and got my Bible and looked and looked for it but I couldn’t find ANYTHING about it! It just can’t be true.
Come on.
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Cinta: The reason why you don’;t see that is because in the book of Jeremiah where God reveals himself to be a FSM and tell old J that all of the other shit in all the other books is there is just a practical joke, there is also a passage warning “those idiots bush and chenney to leave Iraq alone, along with Brittany Spears, of course” Upon taking office, the Cheney-Bush junta seized all bibles in the world and had them re-dacted to omitt the all reference to FSM, Iraq and Brittney. Thus, the current state of world wide ignorance regarding man’s place in the Pastaverse.
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To the guy who wrote this.
Oh Dude. Lighten up. God must have a sense of humor. He made you, and we all get to laugh at you.
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I think you’re mistaken: the FSM gave us the IDEA to invent pasta in his noodly likeness.
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I’d prefer reading in my native language, because my knowledge of your languange is no so well. But it was interesting! Look for some my links:
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You’re a genius. If I say anything more than this I’m going to start yelling at you. We don’t believe in your Bible. Okay? We don’t believe your Bible is correct. Get it?
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