I find this sad. And this is coming from a 14 year old girl that has been raised as a Christian. This is stupid. If you wanted to attract attention then do something else. But make up a religion and trying to find information to back it up is just sad. I wonder how you even thought about such thing. Was you bored in your room or something? I wonder how your parents think about this. And honestly why would you want kids or young adults to learn about such thing? Do you want to brain wash them or something with your made up theory? Seriously, just drop the whole thing & find something else to do.
Good day, anonymous
*Twitch* At 14, you should really know that “Was you bored in your room or something?” should be ‘Were you bored….’ and “I wonder how your parents think about this.” should be ‘I wonder what your parents think about this.’
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Hey, did I get the first post? Cool.
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@ IGK – Congrats!! First posts are coveted! :)))) A new thread to corrupt – things that make Pastafarians happy! :)
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Brain washing…making things up then coming up with fake evidence to support it…stupid? I think she has us mixed up with her religon. Hail the FSM! :D
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I strongly believe in the faith of this religon. As shown on the website there is a number of facts supporting the belief (not theory) that the Great Flying Spaghetti Monster created us and pirates reduce global warming. I strongly support Him (FSM) and if anyone disagrees with the proven facts given then run it by me on my email. Have a nice day pastafarinists. and please restrain from putting vulgar language on the hate mail of all the upset people who know their religon is wrong.
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did he say about christianity or something else?
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Websters will place this 14 year olds letter directly beneath the word ironic. Some day, let’s hope, she will see that no religion has any stronger basis than a pasta based religion. Where’s the parmesan?
Oh, my wife (we are twenty years married w/kids and we love each other and we’re not divorced) says that the girl got her facts from her parents, her pastor and the church community. Therefore the girl is certain that she knows what’s happening. So, until the girl looks outside her present world she is unlikely to discover that we are on a planet, in a solar system, circling a sun and hurtling through time…and all the other cool stuff brought to us by nature. Oops, i see on the horizon that we are about to run out of fossil fuel. Oops, chaos will reign. Ooops, the christians will call it “The Rapture” and seek to convert more pastonians. What fun. It’s like extreme monopoly.
I think my wife is right…now back to the entertainment.
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IGK, you not only got first, but second too :).
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Dear Anonymous, I find it very sad that there are people who believe their own made-up religion is truer (sp?) than mine, just because its older.
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@Anonymous I think you are sad.
So there! ;P
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Haha! great minds think alike, RDPW!
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11th WOOO WOOOO!!!!
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I is sad that I find that be exciting!
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I go room now.
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@Good day, anonymous
“And honestly why would you want kids or young adults to learn about such thing?”
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So they may be enlightened to the existence of the One True Creator….Our Noodly Master…The FSM!
RAmen
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“I wonder how your parents think about this.”
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Oh you’re not going to tell on Bobby about this to his parents now are you? That would make you a Tattle tat you know!
“Do you want to brain wash them or something with your made up theory?”
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Washing of brains? Nah…not here….try Jesus Camp up the road. I hear that’s the best place to have your brain washed. You do of course need to pay to attend to have it done there though.
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anonymous, how do you know that bobby’s parents arent pastafarians? are you spying on them? look out bobby! she’s a stalker! unless she’s talking utter rubbish… hmmm… christian… yeah! it’s utter rubbish! =P
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also, just an update of the music im listening to. i recently found nik kershaw on youtube, via get this on triple m (they keep saying he’s really good, so i decided to listen to some). im also listening to industrial disease. (love this line: two men say they’re jesus – one of them must be wrong!) and sunday bloody sunday. hey, has anyone here seen college saga on youtube? it was hilarious first time i saw it. go see it if you havent.
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I think Liz has got her kid sister posting now.
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HAHA, please tell me this was a joke pleaseeeee.
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This was miss sent, it was supposed to go to a christian website and was supposed to have FSM where it says christian.
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You had me @ Pastafarian…..!
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she has a lack of punctuation, I noticed…
and Red Dutch Pasta Wench, I once had a brief conversation with a friend of mine, and he used the same excuse. When I pointed out that relatively speaking, Christianity is pretty young, and that there are many, many other, much older religions, he just hit me.
Ah, ’tis the life of a Pasatafarian.
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Pasta be with you. You all might enjoy this link.
http://religiousfreaks.com/2007/07/11/bad-weather-or-gods-judgement/#comment-75784
And the Grand Ravioli says to his linear and tubular detractors, “get stuffed”.
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Dear Anonymous,
You mean a religion that someone just made up? You mean a religion that is backed up by no evidence? You mean a religion that is based on supernatural beliefs? Based on a book written by humankind, claiming to be the almighty word? Hmm, sounds familiar, doesn’t it?
Go to the homepage of this website, and you will easily find a link to a certain letter that started it all. Then, you might just possibly understand the situation. The FSM is here to make a point, not dictate lives. It’s harmless, and always has been, unlike a certain religion I know, that was responsible for, I don’t know, maybe the Crusades and the Inquisition and other assorted horrors? Read the Bible sometime, especially the Old Testament. Then you’ll see what it’s all really about.
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There’s truth in ev’rything, even in that bible I flung into the water at the Cape. All of them anonymous landloving followers of G-sus did actually get the pagenumbers right – you have to give them Christ’n meatballs as much. Indeed, they are made somewhat in FSM’s image, which is another thing they got right.
Just look at the symbols of truth and true religion: the world is a meatball within a cosmic Spaghetti, what more subtle signs should FSM give for ev’ryone to one day see the world the way it is…al dente.
Please excuse my English, it’s not my first language (you see, I’m still Dutch. Perhaps that’s why I prefer Gouda over Parmesan).
I wish you all the best of noodles,
Willem (sorry, have to fly)
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This is the first hate mail in a while. Woohoo!
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@Anonymous:
Thank you for your contribution. You wrote that “mak[ing] up a religion and trying to find information to back it up is just sad.” Finally, a fundie with whom I can agree 100%! Thank you for taking such a strong stand against the folly of the Christianity-based Intelligent Design theory. Your open-mindedness and devotion to truth will serve you well in life. Maybe you should spread your wisdom and inform other people at your church about evolution. I’m guessing they can use the enlightenment that your words have to provide.
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Wait a minute. That wasn’t what you meant at all, was it?
-Avatar of Reason
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@ AoR – Hi! Glad to see you posting! Have you caught up on any of the discussion with the fundies/Christians on the other threads? Some interesting stuff!
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@ Wench Octarine – OMFSM!! Nik Kershaw! I lived in England in the 80’s and was a fan of his…things I haven’t thought of in 20 years!! :))))
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Making up a religion!
…That’s dispicable, who on earth would do such a thing?
And finding evidence to back it up!
…Even more perverse!
I pray (to the Flying Spaghetti Monster of course) that all souls who engage in such activity be atoned. May He touch them with his noodly appendage at His earliest convenience.
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Seriously, was this post planted clandestinely by a Pastafarian?
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@Groovy – The FSM will touch them soon or else they will fly off into space.
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Fantastic.. this is better than Borat. .
making people acknowledge their own stupidity through an allegory is very efficient :) unfortunately, i don’t think she quite understood it..
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I humbly assert that the one true, omnipotent, gustatorial presence is Taco Allah! You know that the wellspring of all life comes from the fertile crescent of corn, stuffed with meats, cheeses and veggies…
We scream “Jihad”…. and our women offer a resounding “loo-loo-looo-looo-looo” at the presumption that you rigatoni bucaneers can even begin to think of dominance in the global quest for pseudo-psycho-social-anthro-ecumenical supremacy. We’re goin’ global, baby …. and we’re eatin’ enough beans to take out the entire western hemisphere….
LZ
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I too flirted with believing in the Taco Allah until I realised you just made it up you loser.
You can’t go round making religions up willy nilly! Fool!
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I hope you are soon touched by his noodly appendage and see the error of your ways.
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That taco sure sounds tasty though…
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This is great! Pastafarians!!!! I love it!
May the Flying Spagettii Monster grant it’s people great joy and peace. Their work is truly inspiring.
BTW: ” Can the Flying Spagettii Monster, who knows the future, find the omnipotence to change his future mind?”
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That’s a piece of piss to the FSM.
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I have to agree that this letter is the epitome of irony. BUt that’s not why I’m here. I’m bored. I don’t post enough and I want to talk to someone. Anyone out there?
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The FSM can do whatever he wants!
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Dear Anonymous,
Maybe it’s just because you’re 14, but dear, you’re in high school now. Do you believe everything your parents tell you? Stop relying so heavily on what everyone tells you and THINK FOR YOURSELF.
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Spaghetti Eating Klingon.
There’s a few people in the chat room:
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http://chat.venganza.org/
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We had a real live xian earlier.
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I took a look at that earlier, and it didn’t look that appealing. Maybe I’ll change my mind in a little while.
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@rowdest – wow, the only way i heard about him is tony martin and ed kavalee talking about his prowess with 3 synths and talking about a tour, around the drought areas in aust on the back of a truck with 3 synths! (they did a sketch about it – thats all.) those guys are funny. heard him on youtube and was hooked. lol.
another reminder, go see college saga on youtube!!!
ramen.
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Arp
Jul 21st, 2007 at 11:25 pm
she has a lack of punctuation, I noticed…
and Red Dutch Pasta Wench, I once had a brief conversation with a friend of mine, and he used the same excuse. When I pointed out that relatively speaking, Christianity is pretty young, and that there are many, many other, much older religions, he just hit me.
Ah, ’tis the life of a Pasatafarian.
*
Arp,There is a Chinese saying: the first person to use violence is the first to admit to have run out of arguments.
Therefore he ran out of arguments first an you “won” the discussion! Congratulations :)
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@rdpw – thats why i always argue while wearing a suit of armor – they hurt their hand. =P
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Good thinking wench octarine, good thinking ;))
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@rdpw – not only protective, it also looks cool too!
also, anyone seen the furnace on backyard metal casting? just google waste oil furnace. it melts aluminium and brass with only used fish and chip oil. (which is carbon neutral) my question is this. why the hell isn’t this technology used to generate electricity? it’s free fuel – literally.
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Dear young Lady
Did you ever think about being born in another country, in a non-christian country? Are you sure you’d stil be worshipping Jesus?
You and your Co-Worshippers have already your religious education as a subject, we will not tolerate you to influence natural sciences. This has nothing to do with boredoom, it is our right and we are fighting for it.
But our means, our ways, are far more civilized than yours.
May you be enlightened by our noodely master
RAmen
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@ Wench Octarine – will have to look those up on youtube! Youtube is awesome…
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@ Wench Octarine – I should have included this in the last post…oh well! There is a dairy farm somewhere up north in the US that shovels all the manure underneath the ground and processes it to produce electricity. They produce enough to sell back to the grid…here’s the link:
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http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2004/05/14/BAGJG6LG3R15.DTL
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@Willem van der Decken
Welkom. Er is hier een Nederlandstalige gemeenschap van Pastafarians. Andere Nederlandstaligen die je nieuw-gevonden geloof aanhangen zijn Red DutchPasta Wench en Jean Bart (uit Vlaanderen). Blijf gerust een beetje rondhangen hier, post vooral nog een keer :)
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Hello Anonymous,
First I’d like to comment on your horrible grammar. You’re a disgrace to 14-year-olds everywhere. I’m sure that the FSM would be disappointed in you.
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Next, I’d like to personally say that I’m 14 years old and enjoying the many benefits of Pastafarianism, wenches, grog, piratey outfits, and the wonderful afterlife that I have waiting for me. I think that kids should hear about Pastafarianism, they’ll laugh… and then JOIN US!!!
RAmen
*Insert crappy cursive signature here*
Pixel Pete
Pope, Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
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Just another unrepentful fewl, but in the end I’m sure she’ll see the ultimate correctness of our beliefs. FSM FOREVER, RAmen!
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Honestly I think this is completely satirical!! It must be, it is just too perfect. I would stake money on this being written by either someone older and wiser or atleast a pretty clued up 14 year old with a healthy sense of satire. The real clinchers for me are the lines:
“But make up a religion and trying to find information to back it up is just sad.”
and
“And honestly why would you want kids or young adults to learn about such thing? Do you want to brain wash them or something with your made up theory?”
When taken out of context they are pretty insightful and relevant.
The poor grammar seems to be thrown in for spice!
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Hahahaha you speak of brain washing yet you were raised (aka brainwashed) Christian. I was Christian for a very long time, then I converted to pastafarianism. I realize something, Christians look as ridiculous as any other cult. I pity you all
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@ rowdiest – i think outube is almost… holy.
maybe He spends most of his time there?
and, yeah, the mnure thing is cool, but the waste vegetable oil (or wvo) is free from his local fish & chip shop! he just made the burner(s)! whereas the manure requires a farm! enough exclamation marks already!
if every fish & chip shop had one they could sell power into the grid. and the oil wouldnt be wasted (or used in the same chip cooker for 10 years straight) lol. ill explain why its carbon neutral in next post (for everyone).
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@ Wench Octarine – Sounds good…where are you? I wish we had fish and chip shops here in Oklahoma but alas not…I miss them!
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same amount of carbon released as was taken out by plant.
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im in australia, lol. *takes bite out of meat pie & sauce* the guy on the website… idk.
but that thing melts aluminium, brass and possibly iron! thats great, considering my lpg stove(one burner + lpg cylander(sp?)) melts only lead! lol. thats more than 1000 °c(the aluminium)!
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also, its safer too. if it overfills with oil the flames go out! bring in the heat to electricity generators, i say!
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@ Wench Octarine – We have many Aussie Pastafarians! Meat pie and sauce…making me hungry! Holy cow, what you are talking about it hot! Hard to imagine!
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*sips beer from stubbie* huh? oh! lol. just been making a mould for lead out of concrete powder & water. coin in bottom of container, and waiting…… lol. anyone got any advice on mould making? plz?
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@ Wench Octarine – Wow, we get some interesting people around this place! I don’t have any advice for you, but you never know who will know what around here…
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Give the 14 year old kid a break. She probably isn’t to the point in her life where she can make a choice for herself concerning her religious beliefs and is parrotting back what has been shoved down her throat for 14 years and sees things at its face value only. I will say as a dyed-in-the-wool Catholic and a teacher in a public school (I teach math and I can’t spell – sue me if my spelling is worse than the kid’s), I find this site hillarious. Its a parody for crying out loud and as a person that lives 20 minutes away from Kansas, it’s even funnier for me. I give my friends that live over in Kansas tons of crap about ID vs evolution. I do love the idea of a beer volcano. Very intriguing. Cheers!
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rowdiest – lol, you’re right. i am a bit weird. but iv seen weirderer…
has everyone seen college saga already? if not…..
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ac/dc rock. this is a fact…
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Do you think they actually look at the website before dropping this stuff?
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Anonymous, you should really take a look around. What exactly promotes your faith above another’s? A book allegedly written by men two-thousand years ago? Even if the original was correct, and not written as a scam, do you really think it would have been able to remain unaltered after all those years? If a person is 100 years old, do you take everything he or she says at face value? No. You understand that great age does not always create flawlessness. So why believe in the infallibility of a 2000-year-old document?
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Webster defines brain washing as:
1 : a forcible indoctrination to induce someone to give up basic political, social, or religious beliefs and attitudes and to accept contrasting regimented ideas
2 : persuasion by propaganda or salesmanship
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Your Parents/Guardians are Christian as well, correct? So, when you were born, they began “forcibly indoctrinating” you (punishing you for not attending services, etc).
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@Ruler of the Seamonkeys
It is because she has had all that doctrine “shoved down her throat” that we must react thus. It will teach her to think for herself instead of merely parroting. I wish someone had pointed out all of this to me earlier. I would not have wasted all those Sunday mornings!
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To the OP: Funny, I think I remember reading on a Christian message board 2,000 years ago the exact same argument FROM THE JEWS!!!!
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Robert Hood…so what if she has religious beliefs? Good for her. I would of course say the same if someone didn’t have religious beliefs – so don’t think I am being a hypocrite. Whatever your beliefs are, I don’t care, nor do I mind. Why is it necessary for you to push your beliefs on her? Isn’t that the same if she were (well, she kind of was but not my point really) pushing her beliefs on her. Last time I checked the Constitution, you are allowed to have freedom of religion and you can talk about it – the same rights you have to say that you wasted all that time at church growing up.
I still say give the kid a break. She’s only 14 for cryin’ out loud! Maybe for someone like her they will learn to accept other people’s views, maybe not as their own, but learn tolleration of something that is completely different from their pov when they read responses that aren’t negatively toned (like her message) and would be more responsive. Oh man, that was a run on sentence – my bad.
In the end, who cares. I still say as someone that is religious and has faith in a higher being, this is an amusing website.
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It is because she is 14 that it so vital to encourage her to think freely and not accept it blindly. If, after she has thought, she reaches the same conclusion and continues her faith, more power to her. It’s the parrot-talk part that concerns me. It shows she supports christianity not on its own merits, but because she was forced to.
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My intention was not to belittle her or her beliefs. If a person has beliefs resulting from objective consideration, that’s great.
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She is either too young to understand or just stumbled upon the site and didn’t do any research on what it is the FSM represents and stands for…give her a break ignorance is bliss…
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long live fsm and that girl is way too young to ever understadn religion (shelterd life anyone sheltered life) she probably is home schooled buy a bunch of relgious christians and there all liek im a dum ass and dont think about everythings FUCK YOU
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haha yeahhhh go spaghetti on rye. you know i heart you kid. fsm owns. who is she to question a flying mass of noodles’ power over us all? seriously. as if it were FAKE or something. she disgusts me. for those of us who are actually dedicated to the Flying Spaghetti Monster (His Noodliness in all his glory, long live the starch), people like her ruin the whole day. pishaw. that’s all i have to say to her. pishaw, indeed.
:D
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i smoke crack rocks from my mom’s dick
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oh that’s hot fin. really hot.
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okay, i’ll realte to anonymous for a sec. i’m seventeen, vice captain of a catholic school and in a religious society. even the news forces religion with “pray for rain” and “thank god for this fine weather”. some of us however are unlucky, and were raised by the god squad and corrupted these children from birth. show pity, this girl thinks her imaginary friend is going to torture her if she’s bad.
- to the parents of anonymous and any like her – let them make their own minds up!
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such thing we though us bored we think how? school grammar you taught been i see great! Must you translationing on packagings from which obtained I from 99 cent store!
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Yourdumb Jul 25th, 2007 at 10:56 am
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Ummmm?….hehehehehehehehe
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Why are all the new posts without possibilitys for commenting?? I want to comment on some of them but can’t!
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@RedDutchPastaWench – Maybe the Prophet is trying to make everyone use the live chat? I would like to comment on some of them as well.
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I have a thought about why the hate mail from self proclaimed christians is always laced with profanity. The last line of defence for an arguement is name calling. Well, the hate mailers do not have the education to have any other defence, so profanity it is.
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RAmen
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I really think some people need to get a sense of humor. This is what we call satire. Honestly, why would you get yourself so worked up about this. Some of the things you and others say in your “hate” mail are more offensive than this religion itself. At least those here are not making claims about their beliefs that they can’t back up with actions. Seriously, if this is what they believe, let them believe it. They are not hurting anyone. And they don’t seem to be trying to force their beliefs on anyone as your term “brainwashing” would imply. Yes it does seem that they are “making fun” of Christianity, but how many Muslim or Jewish jokes have you told? If you don’t like it, then find another website to hang out at.
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I’m from Germany and when I read this, I thought you were totally … silly!
This “religion” is, what you Americans really need. Your religious delusion is nearly so extrem as the delusion of the Islamists. This religion should show you, that you are an innocent. The theory of a Flying Spaghetti Monster is as realistic as you illusion that we were made by a higher thing, that you call god!
Read on Wikipedia, because of what this religion is excactly founded.
P.S.: I’m sorry, I probably made some mistakes, but I’m also only 14 and in Germany we learn English relatively late!
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@ Dominic – Hi there, probably because of the fact that English is your second language you don’t understand that this ‘religion’ of the FSM is a satire on all religions. It was formed to show how silly it is for people to try to force their religious views to be taught in schools as true science.
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We believe that all relgions are delusions and myths.
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Many of us who visit this site, do not believe in a supernatural diety of any kind. Some do, but that is their burden to bear.
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By the way, your English is pretty good for learning it ‘late’ and the fact that you are only 14.
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Oh sweet Flying Spaghetti Monster…
Robert Hood – she may or may not be at a stage in her emotional development where she is able to decide for herself. And maybe when she is older and out of under the control of her parents (I know mine had the rule of going to church while I lived in their house – once I was outside of their control, I could decide whether or not I wanted to go/believe/whatever) she will be mature enough to decide for herself. She’ll figure it out what she truly believes eventually and sometimes its better if they do it on their own – its more sincere and true to themselves, imo.
Satire people! Don’t take things either way (pro-religion v. anti-religion) so dang seriously. Granted I get hacked off at fundamentalists (I have friends who are of that type and I live in RLDS and Inter. House of Prayer country – somehow I don’t think Jesus is going to be coming to Jackson County Missouri – but if someone else does believe it – have fun), but what do I care what someone believes or doesn’t believe – makes no difference to me.
Iron Bess – Its not a burden if we chose to believe in a higher being. Why should it be? Let people believe what they want to believe.
RAmen!
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:D
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Does anonymous know what humor is? And I agree with Ruler of the Sea monkeys
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@ ROTS – “Its not a burden if we chose to believe in a higher being. Why should it be? Let people believe what they want to believe.” Sorry Seamonkey king, I don’t happen to agree with you. Belief in a invisible sky fairy is a burden and detrimental, not only to self but to the human race itself.
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It won’t be until people can shake off the yoke of religion and faith, that they can begin to heal this planet and go onto do great things.
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Until that day happens, we will continue to doom ourselves to continue to repeat our history of xenophobia and violence. Faith is a curse, a handicap and we as logical, enlightened people should not continue to encourage something that is so obviously an archaic invention that probably was started by early man to explain the unexplainable.
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We are stuck until acceptance and tolerance are integrated into the way humans deal with humans.
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“Do you want to brain wash them or something with your made up theory?”
That’s what all religions do!
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@ Centralplexus, wow you are very smart, you caught onto our diabolic plan quickly.
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So what do you want to do tomorrow Brain?
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Same thing we do every day Pinky, try to take over the world!
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Iron Bess has pegged the sarcasm meter! Get the back up one out.
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Hey, sarcasm R us! I majored in architecture and minored in sarcasm. (Or was that the other way round?) So naturally that makes me the most sarcastic paramedic on the planet.
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I’m sure that I, amongst others find it sad that 14 year old girl began two sentences with “and” and one with “but”. I also feel compelled to point out the misuse of the word “Was” in the sentence “Was you bored in your room or something? “. I am quite sorry, but this terrible mistake would make any English teacher in his or her own right mind cry on the spot.
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SE – you bring up a good point. This could be a plant by a covert pirate to cause a response from the pastafarians.
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Well, it’s working then :)
*
Then again, sometimes I see language errors even I, as a non-native speaker, would never make. Some people are simply horrible in spelling and proper grammar!
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growing rate of illiteracy in today’s youth anyone?
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I find it desgraceful that so many people make so many simple errors or just refuse to follow the simple rules of grammar.
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@ SE.
sorry, but i think you’ll find that it’s d*i*sgraceful.
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Oh my! How terribly ironic! I can’t believe I did that! Thank you.
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don’t worry about it. i put an incorrect apostrophe in “it’s” in my last post. your point is taken though SE, though we make simple typos, anonymous, who is currently subjected to the study of grammar should know better, especially when trying to make herself out to be an intellectual, in which she has failed woefully.
christianity’s first prophet was Jesus, if anonymous and her kind are the prophets of our age, may the spaghettideity take pity on them.
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Christianity
the belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree…,
created by Roman committee
FSM
the belief the world was made in 5 days by a perfect creature known to us in the form of pasta and meatballs while drunk on his own beer volcano’s, who created his choosen people pirates to protect us from global warming and ninja’s
Whose love which we follow with lose morals will give us eternal beer and strippers
Revealed by the prophet Bobby (pasta be upon him)
Now tell me
Which of the religions above makes more sense
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they’re equally convincing really. but you forgot one important thing jon. they weren’t just any pirates, the originals were midgets, those actually touched by his noodly appendage. the original pirate only came about when His pasta sauce dripped from His carbohydrate rich body, and scalded the eyes of his followers, hence the eyepatches and the original ‘yaaarrrggghhh’ of pain.
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We are all touched by the noodly appendage or we would fly into space. Short people just get more attention.
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When you put it that way jon, what the heck are the christians thinking.
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Well, its always better coming from a 14 year old girl than in one.
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QUOTE – 14 Yr Old Girl
If you wanted to attract attention then do something else. But make up a religion and trying to find information to back it up is just sad. I wonder how you even thought about such thing. Was you bored in your room or something? I wonder how your parents think about this. And honestly why would you want kids or young adults to learn about such thing? Do you want to brain wash them or something with your made up theory?
Erm… how do you think Christianity started? Give me solid, 100% proof that your god exists and i will put 100% of my faith in his bank. Untill you can give me his phone number i suggest you do what the FSM preaches, and learn tollerance and understaning toward all those in the world, weather they are Buddist, Christian or FSM. We do not care who or what you belive in, just that you belive. I am Agnostic, i chose to belive in all faiths. I chose to belive in the FSM a little more than any other, because it accepts that it may not infact exist. God can not prove he exists because proof denies faith, and without faith he is nothing. So if you truely believe does that not create? and so the FSM must there fore exist for some truely belive.
May you be touched by his noodely and tolerant appendage.
RAmen
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okay i’m back (after vacation and a virus in the laptop) and i have to say that this is sad that people wish to take time out of thier lives to write a bunch of lies to people who don’t even really care about what you say.
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today is a friday his holy. hope u guys and wenches are wearing at leats an eyepatch while typing here today.
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brainwash??? i think the bible has brainwashed more ppl than this theory. why follow everything you are taught….i belive you should question every theory youve ever heard of, question everything…dont follow what someone told you…you have a brain use it! you’re an individual. i think its intresting to learn about religion, but i dont follow any one religion. so sit down order a copy of the gospel of the fsm, buy a book on buddhism and other religons, buy a bunch of books on phiosophy like nihilism, communism, and anarchism, sit down, read and let your mind wander, oh…and buy a shirt and support our cause!!! =]
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just a quick break, 20 minutes to happy hour, US East Coast time.
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Russia – good suggestions.
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For Christ’s – I mean Flying Spaghetti Monster’s sake!!!
Iron Bess – first off, it’s technically Queen of the Seamonkeys – last time I checked I have female parts (my husband will back me up on that). It makes me so sad that you couldn’t pick up on my obvious female-ness through the impersonal internet…read sarcasm in this…
Second, I don’t see why having faith is a burden. Your argument seems to be based on your dismissal of religion for yourself. If you don’t feel the need to include faith in a higher being (God, goddess, Captain Crunch, etc) in your life then fine for you. I am perfectly happy and I don’t feel burdened by my faith and my religion. I could see if we were talking about an extremist or cultish religion. Religious groups that constantly condemn you, telling you that you are going to hell, but ONLY they can save you could be considered a burden. However, by dismissing all religion and faiths you are putting your views on someone else. When I look at the Dali Lamma (don’t sue me if I spelled it wrong – I openly admit to being deficient in that skill area), he doesn’t seem burdened by his faith. I would say that he has been burdened by the illegal actions of China, but not by his personal views and faith. Tibetain monks that I had the privilage of meeting and having dinner with back in college a few years ago seemed to be the most free and open people I’ve ever met. Their burden was sadness knowing that they’ll probably never see their home land again in their lifetime, but it was not because they had faith.
Russia – only if you take everything in the bible literally. I’m Catholic and I don’t take everything in the bible literally – like I actually believe that there was one man named Adam and there was one woman named Eve in the beginning. Though again, if people want to believe in the bible, so be it. As long as you don’t end up sacrificing your son or having multiple wives, so what. The messages in the bible, from the stories, is what is important.
Did someone say happy hour??? RAmen to that!!!
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JesusH – that was plain disgusting…ewww!
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@ JesusH
Girls are not like Rum. They are not best at 14 years old and mixed up with coke.
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This is ridiculous. You guys are soooo wrong. HOW IN THE WORLD CAN YOU NOT BELIEVE IN GOD? How can you see a sunset and not see Jesus there through it? How can you hear about a person that is DEAD, reach the gates of heaven, and come back? And what about the man that went to hell? He did not believe in God, and I believe hated christians. Well, he went to hell, and God brought him back to life. So tell me, does this make sense? He hates christians, dies, then suddenly, has faith? And explain the proof behind the bible. The diaries found that prove the Bible to be true. How can you go through life worshiping PASTA?! That is the craziest and most ilogical thing I’ve ever in my entire life heard of. Pasta is a food that you eat. I can’t believe this. And for the man that was a christian, I still can’t believe it. God is true. Explain how hundreds of people heard God around the globe, had no connection to eachother, and never knew him before? Jesus died for us, because we sin and don’t measure up to the standards of perfection. Everyones lied, cheated, stolen, something. Well, the LORD loved us so much that he sent Jesus to die for us. His only son. And he proves it everyday. Every book except the Bible has been proven false, or needed a change here or there from new discoveries. Not the Bible. The Bible is the word of God, and I pray that he will show you that. Not some pasta that people eat. Call me what you wish, but you people need to hear the truth.
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the truth? you can’t handle the truth…
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@ ME
Where is this proof you speak of? What man that went to hell (prove he went to hell for a start). what diaries that prove the bible to be true? and anyway, it’s not just any pasa, it is the noodly creator of the universe, the almighty FSM. is it really that far of a stretch for a christian who believes that their God’s devine plan included his carpenter son being nailed to a piece of wood to believe in a flying spaghetti monster? when did hundreds of people hear god around the globe?
how does jesus and god show they love us everyday, with the death and destruction the only events considered newsworthy?
since when has the bible NOT been proven false. The only proven fact about it was that Jesus did exist, and where he went, and how he died. The rest of it is completely unsubstantiated.
Prove it.
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Lots of men have been to Hell…. It’s in Michigan.
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Few have gone back
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BCA
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Oh, and Me…Friday is a high holy day for us, so please mellow and enjoy.
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RAmen
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Aren’t we supposed to be tolerant? Didn’t the FSM tell us that it’s okay if some people don’t want to believe in him? Just because someone else is misguided is no reason to make fun of them.
Besides, if they don’t convert, it means more beer and strippers for us.
P-)> (bearded one-eyed pirate smiley)
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Me,
I will try not to point out every flaw in your argument. I am just going to say a few things.
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First of all, how can you not believe in reincarnation when, under hypnosis people are able to remember the life before birth, in many cases speaking in languages that they didn’t know that they knew?
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Second of all, you say that people all over the world heard God. I don’t think that is true. People all over the world started many different religions. In fact, the vast majority of early religions were not Christianity.
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As for those people who died and saw heaven and hell, those could easily have been dreams. Dreams consist of thoughts processed right before sleep. If someone is afraid of death, he or she may very well invision his or her perception of death in a dream.
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I guess I should also point out that the Bible has numerous editations and has been proven false in many cases. It gives the backbone for many good morals though.
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Lastly, I am a bit disturbed by one of your comments. You said “Jesus died for us, because we sin and don’t measure up to the standards of perfection.” How incredibly selfish! Are you saying that you don’t have to try to be a good person because Jesus’ death makes up for it? Why don’t you just try to be perfect. You say that humans sin. Well, why succumb to such a low excuse? Why can’t we be perfect? We may as well try and stop wasting our time trying to tell other people what to believe.
`
By the way, I may be wrong here, but wasn’t Jesus supposed to be the Christian God? If that’s the case, how is Jesus God’s son? Please explain. Religion fascinates me and would like to have my facts straight.
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@ SE
The trinity of the Church dictates that there are three distinct parts to god:
the father (God in heaven), the son (Jebus), and the holy spirit (i don’t know what this one is represented as). but although they are distinctly seperate, they are also claimed to be the same thing.
confused yet?
jesus is, according to christians, the earthly body of his own father.
or just some major inbreeding.
in any case, jesus isn’t generally regarded as christian god, just god’s son and their most important prophet.
meanwhile muslims believe mohammed is more important than jesus, and jews are still waiting for their messiah.
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I couldn’t agree less. We really shouldn’t propagate that old religious fantasy.
The moral guidance of the Bible is dreadful.
The old testament. We’re to begin?
The new testament is so badly written it is almost impossible to detect the tiny message of ‘lets forgive people’ which in itself is massively overplayed causing great suffering and guilt in people who can’t forgive terrible things that have happened to them.
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No one actually in need of moral guidance stands a chance from reading the Bible.
You might read the Bible and decide it supports whatever decision you were going to make anyway. It is VERY good (and popular) for that! Actually if you look around the world you will realise that is the single and only use of the Bible.
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But that sort of rationalisation is not guidance!
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It drives me mad when xians go on about how good the bible is.
It is a dreadful dreadful book that makes almost no sense what so ever.
People have spent centuries trying to work out what it is supposed to mean and get no closer.
Not because it is very deep but because it is just such junk.
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Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix is a better read and far superior moral guidance and fibre than the Bible.
I don’t even rate Rowling that much but the bible!? Give it a rest.
There is certainly drama in the bible but it is mostly 18 rated sex and violence.
I wouldn’t tell people to watch Reservoir Dogs for moral guidance which is about the level of the bible.
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strange, all my moral guidance used to come from reservoir dogs.
is that why no1 likes me??
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No. But it is the reason why all your friends are dead!
But on the plus side you have pretty sharp dress sense and taste in music.
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I don’t understand how the atheists let the xians get away with the moral guidance gobshite.
Many of the pastafarians on this site (Beth,Alchemist,Popoff,Nikkiee,DPG to name a few) all know from visiting xian sites like “In Pursuit of God” that xians who stick close to the bible are some of the nastiest people we’ve ever had the misfortune to meet.
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Don’t get me wrong I don’t think all xians are nasty. I know some very nice ones.
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But some of those hardcore/fundie xians are really nasty hateful pieces of work.
I don’t think the bible made them that way but they are living proof that it does not make you a good person.
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I think we all know that some of the hatemail sent in to CoFSM is a joke by some member of the church.
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But enough of it is from real supposed xians for it to be plain on this site alone that the bible does not help peoples moral development.
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I’m on the fence as to whether it is positively harmful. I think it is because it promotes hate and discrimination but it is absolutely not good.
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RAmen funky symbol dude Dan :) RAmen!
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@ ۞
woah, calm down.
for a start, aside from the chamber of secrets, the order of the phoenix is the worst of the series.
secondly, the hate mailers, especially these nasty ones you refer to are a minority of the christian church, most of them do get the ‘peace’ message it tries to portray.
the nasty ones are either just naturally aggressive, or they think they’re doing us a favour by scaring us into conversion, which they’re obviously failing at due to their natural ignorance and stupidity.
some atheists and pastafarians seem to forget that christians, who we think are moronic in the extreme, KNOW there is a god, just as much as we KNOW there isn’t one.
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I know those nasties are the minority.
I’m pointing out that the bible hasn’t done them any good.
It tends to contradict the claims for the enriching properties of religion.
The singular point is that the more people take the bible seriously the nastier they get.
It may be that the bible is corrupting influence. But as mentioned it isn’t good.
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agreed. it is a simple fact that the more you believe in something, the more you’ll fight to protect.
as the great pirate lord barbosa said “they’re not rules, really more like guidelines”.
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Arrrrr!
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My problem with religion is the hatred, bigotry, guilt and suffering it causes.
I don’t care if you believe the world was farted out the arse of a rat.
Religion poisons society and it is allowed to get away with this ‘morally enriching’ line.
Even some atheists think religion has helped society.
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Unfortunately we let them drag us in to their daft discussions about evolution and leave the real problems unchallenged.
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It’s the atheists fault for falling in to lame xian traps.
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Whaaa…?
I know there is a God! He has two meaty balls and lots of Noodly Appendages!!!
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I didn’t like any of the Potter books that much.
My point was the friendship, sacrifice, team work and determination to create justice in the Order of The Phoenix is far better moral guidance than the bible.
I wasn’t so much feting the literature.
The plot is stirring stuff and great reading for kids.
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Hi Nikkiee. We must stop meeting like this!! ;)
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have you ever read leviticus? it may not be as good as potter, but it’s pretty funny. without a doubt my number one weapon against xians everywhere.
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Levticus is an absolute hoot. Even most civilised xians dismiss it.
You will find some of them quoting the sections that proscribe homosexuality though.
They throw out the bigotry they don’t like and then keep the bigotry they do and then get all morally indignant about it.
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Really vile and two-faced.
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The bible is just great for justifying whatever crackpot ideas you’ve got.
Select the sections that are nearest to the thing you want to be true and intepret them to your purpose.
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There is so much precident for that, that it is actually seen as a legitimate stance!
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Incredible.
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I just found this:
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http://www.patcondell.net/In_summary__don_t_be_a.jpg
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Which as far as I’m concerned is the full worthwhile content of the bible.
Obviously you have to throw out a lot of crap but when you get down to. This is everything it says.
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Rowan Redbeard
Jul 27th, 2007 at 11:11 pm
Aren’t we supposed to be tolerant? Didn’t the FSM tell us that it’s okay if some people don’t want to believe in him? Just because someone else is misguided is no reason to make fun of them.
*
yeah well, He said something like that yes. But heck, it’s so much FUN teasing some of these fundies :))) I’m sure the FSM will forgive us :P
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@ ۞
The singular point is that the more people take the bible seriously the nastier they get.
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Hey ۞, any facts to justify that claim?
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Jack Van Impe takes the Bible so seriously, he embraces armageddon. Crazy bastard.
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BCA
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krony,
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I was refering to personal experience on Christian websites and similar testimonials from other people on this site and other sites.
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The In Pursuit of God site is particularly nasty where the xian faithful engage in bullying and rudeness.
Really quite unpleasant people.
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I realise that many xians aren’t that nasty. But it betrays the lie that the bible somehow infuses people with goodness.
If you aren’t a good person at the start of reading the bible it won’t make you good by the end.
Partly because it contains so much nastiness that if you don’t already know what to ignore you might actually take it in.
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You must have seen all the really nasty ‘GOD HATES FAGS’ campaigners.
Those people take the bible literaly and then start persecuting people.
Very nasty indeed. All inspired by the bible – apparently!
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You might play the ‘they misunderstood it’ card, which is fine. My point is of course people misunderstand the bible it is so fucking dreadfully written.
Thats another reason it shouldn’t be used as moral guidance.
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@krony – well let’s look at all the bible maniacs who have screamed trash in our faces. 2nd. look at the pope. four years ago he yelled some trash about how certain books were seducing christian youths into damned athiests. one of those books was the harry potter series. crazy idiot.
3rd. look at the thousands who marched over to the middle east in the 13th century and started killing other people and dieing themselves, all just for the bible.
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. yeh. that evidence and facts for u. Owned.
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Good one Lord of the Pirate Fish.
I was going to mention the Catholics. They do some really nasty stuff.
Loads of people have stories of being bullied and humiliated in Catholic care homes.
Forget about sexual child abuse, the basic cruelty.
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Look at the nastiness they spread about condoms and AIDS and contraception in general.
They always claim it is justified by the bible.
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Good example BCA.
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Go here http://www.jvim.com/ then click Illustrations and then click Revelations illustrated.
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That is some serious mind warping by the bible.
It has not done the people who produced those pictures any good at all!
It is a serious head-fuck.
Remember these people believe in the literal truth of this craziness!
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thanks. also one more evedence. the roman people some time ago had a slave rebelion. they eventually got the slaves and killed evey single one by nailing them to wooden crosses and putting the crosses alongside the road. all done by christians who were cycopathes.
RAmen
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Does anyone else have some bible inspired xian nastiness for krony?
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uhhhhhhhhhhhh.. nope this pirates empty of other ideas. oh well.
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I wonder if they justify holding back science from the bible.
Just because it doesn’t mention stem cells, they can probably find something.
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knowing them they probably will find out how
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I just read anarticle about a Dutch Broadcasting company, very christian one. They took one of those magnificent series of David Attenborough and simply cut out all comments of evolution, earth being really old etc. They didn’t show the last episode dealing with the great apes and us, because quote :”it doesn’t fit with wat our core-audience believes”. Oh brother, I mean I new they were christian and all but never realised just how bad it was. Yes, let’s censure the lot and make sure people will never start asking awkward questions about creation and stuff like that
:(
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UY-ZrwFwLQg
this video should be brodcasted to every relgeous website in the www. trust me it’s a laugh fest to all athiests and Pastafarians
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@ ۞
You must have seen all the really nasty ‘GOD HATES FAGS’ campaigners. Those people take the bible literally and then start persecuting people. Very nasty indeed. All inspired by the bible – apparently!
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I made some earlier comments on a different string about that. I think those folks need to read more of the Bible, specifically the story of the adulterous woman (see John 8:1-12 if you’d like). The teaching of Jesus is clear that his followers are to hate the sin but love the sinner. No doubt some , like th Westboro folks, get that wrong by picking verses to inspire hate. Nowhere in the New Testament does Jesus condone hate. I can speak for myself to say I have less hate the more time I spend in the Bible.
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@ LOPF – Thanks for the link! Good stuff!
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Hi BCA!!!!!
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@ everyone – you have been busy today! Looks like a good discussion but I’ve got things going… :(((
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@ ۞: “If you aren’t a good person at the start of reading the bible it won’t make you good by the end.” RAmen to that! We were having a conversation with my very Catholic mother-in-law a while back about learning about other religions. She said she’s spent her whole life learning how to be a good Catholic and didn’t have time to learn about anything else. Later, I said that it’s sad that she’s not spent her life learning how to be a good human.
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angryyoungatheist, but don’t many Christains get insulted when people say “Jesus!” as an exclaimation, saying, “Don’t say the lord’s name in vain”? Also, don’t people say stuff like “worship Jesus Christ, our God” etc.?
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LOL. Listen to that radio show! Marcus Brigstoke says the same thing.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/comedy/nowshow.shtml?focuswin
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im not sure i think bobby had a vision, which is why pastafarianism isnt made up.
BUT if i was inspired to make up a religon and the back it up with “evidence”, id probably take a look at history texts books about the dark ages (i think it was like 400-1000 AD but im not sure). where some crazy guys wanted power and convieniently wrote a book based on the principle, cant seam to rember what the book was called. It had this main character that was sorto a hippy and didnt belive in violence, most people didnt belive the guy apart from a few loyal followers tho
as for making up proofs there was this guy called tom who lived a little after, he was a real cool dude he came up with seven ways to prove he was right.
shame i cant rember the name of the book, its a really interesting read some of the stuff in it is unbelivably cool, the main character could walk on water (i know not quite as cool as neo who can fly, or that native american that turns into a hawk, but still cool), locust swarms and blood rivers, man that stuff was better than hollywood!!!
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xbehave – I’ve got a decent range of punctuation available. Only 10p per apostrophe. Commas free :))
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@ SE
true that. but consider … it’s quite obvious that christians get confused about alot of things. if they get confused between their god and his earthly representation, that simply doesn’t surprise me. It may also just be an excuse for the “do not worship false idols” thing, if they say they’re the same thing, they must be safe.
@ everyone
new ammo against the church!
the pope used to serve under Hitler. may be surprising, but when you look closely the nazis and fundies hate all the same people: gypsies, blacks, jews etc.
also, judging by geographical origin, Jesus was alot darker skinned than most christians like to believe. you say that to a fundie, it’s like starting a personal holy war.
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Jebus was white…just like der Fuhrer……
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BCA
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Yep, Hitler was very Aryan: blond hair, tall figure!!! LOL!
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Zieg heil! Zieg heil! Right in der fuhrer’s face….
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Imma Chargin’ mah lazer for Hitler. Shoop das whoop. SS Shoop.
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Lilith, you minx….
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@RDPW
Ok,just dropping in here for a very short bit. Was that Dutch station the EO by anychance¿ In that case I would not surprise me too much. If it was any other (KRO?) then things would be worse than I thought in the Netherlands.
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I wonder what would happen if people spread rumors that Jesus was gay. Do you think Christians would deny it or stop persecuting homosexuals?
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I find this sad. And this is coming from a 17 year old guy that has been raised as a human. This reply is stupid. If you wanted to attract attention then do something else. But to write a letter in response something you dont like is just stupid. I wonder how you even thought about such thing. Was you bored in your room or something? I wonder how your parents think about this. And honestly why would you want kids or young adults to read such a thing? Do you want to brain wash them or something with your insults? Seriously, just drop the whole thing & find something else to do.
*As we can see with a few changes here and there we can turn the tables on the original post.
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“Stereotypical Environmentalist…
Jul 28th, 2007 at 11:44 pm
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I wonder what would happen if people spread rumors that Jesus was gay. Do you think Christians would deny it or stop persecuting homosexuals?”
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There already is a theory to that effect. It’s even in wikipedia!
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@ SE
the church, at least in australia no longer persecutes homosexuals. i here things to the effect of ‘god loves fags’, whenever the topic comes up in class. and anyway, the church would deny that jesus is gay, no doubt about it. the funnier thing would be to ask them after this denial if they can prove it, possibly through a relationship with Mary Magdeline.
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Just because jesus hung out with men doesn’t make him gay.
Although he must have had a weird relationship with his mother.
Did Jesus know his mother was a virgin? Does he mention it?
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joseph tried to raise caine but wasn’t abel.
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Wait, this sound’s familiar I can’t put my finger on it. “make up a religion and trying to find information to back it up” That sounds like something some one else has done before I just don’t know who.
“Was you bored in your room or something?”
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@ christian/atheist- i think christianity was created by some person who tried to make up a religion and failed to find facts behind. FSMism is the only religion which has proven facts behind it.
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DPG, yes it was. Only the EO is stupid enough for that. Kijk eens op de site van de bond tegen het vloeken! Prachtig echt prachtig!
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From some (several) posts back, there were a few people blaming the bad behavior of Christians on the Bible. Please. Their behavior, like anyone else’s in the world, is due to the choices they made for themselves, not on an object. If someone, who is a Christian, persecutes someone that is gay, that is their choice (not a good one of course) and they are responsible for their actions. The same arguement can me made for any religious group – terroristic actions taken by someon is not not the fault of the Koran, but the fault of the person that decided to kill innocents by blowing themselves up in a market place. They made the choice, not a book. If an athesist were to kill someone, the fault does not lie upon the idea that they don’t have a religion, but on their own will and actions. Don’t blame the Bible for people’s stupid choices.
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Weird thought – in church today we got to listen to the story of Sodom and Gammorah (I always get a kick out of the “naughty” stories). The idiot girl who obviously had never looked at the story before noon, and pronounced Gammorah like Gamora – the monster from the Godzilla monsters. After laughing myself sick over this, I thought, of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Look what the internet has done to me…it also helped to calm me just a tad when I wanted to smack the stupid priest for his ignorance of world history and WWII.
RAmen.
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Ruler of the Seamonkeys,
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If you were reading my post, I thought I was clear that I wasn’t blaming their behaviour on the Bible.
You are absolutely right people are responsible for their own actions and must not be allowed to blame an idea.
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I was pointing out that the Bible doesn’t make people better. It isn’t good moral guidance. I think it can make them worse because they take on the bad bits in a bad way and justify their action because of all the vagueness.
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When you look at the ‘GOD HATES FAGS’ Christians they fiercely justify their actions using the bible.
You’re right. They can’t do that. THEY hate gays and are using the bible as a front.
THEY are nasty people using a feeble book as an excuse.
But you must be able to see that their ability to foist their spite upon the bible makes it harmful in that case.
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My point was that some atheists have sleep walked in to the idea that the bible is good moral guidance but factual nonsense.
In truth it is neither of factual or moral merit and potentially harmful because of its vague rambling opaque style.
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Why do religions need to write such dreadful books?
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In fact you support my main point – that reading the bible does not infuse people with goodness.
People are made good or bad by different, longer and more complex processes that reading a single book.
If you do read a book, don’t make it the bible folks, you won’t understand it. It won’t mean anything to you and you will end up more confused. Oh and treat anyone who proposes to interpret it for you with great suspicion. People have got off on some very very bad tracks from that book.
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@ Ruler of the Seamonkeys.
it seems someone is forgetting the fundies.
of course when there is a person who takes the bible as the word of god, they’re going to hate everyone it tells them to hate.
i mean, ۞ is right, the bible does ranmble in a manner about as clear as mud, but still when it directly says that faggotry is an abomination, this does insight everyone who draws all their power and guidance from the bible to have a severe and unrelenting hatred of any minority group attacked in that horrible excuse for a book.
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@RDPW,
¨@DPG, yes it was. Only the EO is stupid enough for that. Kijk eens op de site van de bond tegen het vloeken! Prachtig echt prachtig!¨
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Haha, that was good fun, the Spanish Catholic church is upset because someone else is cashing in on the jesus thingy. What´s next, a lawsuit alledging that the Catholic church has a patent on that sort of business tactic?
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@angryyoungatheist
¨it seems someone is forgetting the fundies.¨
Fundies needed for something? Right here if anyone wants me :) If you need someone to yell at dishonest christians like Humble Pie just let me know.
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to anonymous Christian-
you are really doing a poor job representing your homeboy J with your terrible grammar. if you are going to criticize- at least do it with some dignity.
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ill just take the commas then!
Im working on a remote desktop using a spanish keyboard that it thinks is american, and im only used to british keyboards, so my lack of punctuation is because im offering you the freedom to punctuate it however you want! it ahs ntohing to do with the fact non of these keys do what they´re meant to!¡
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Last time I looked in the Bible there were some really good messages about loving your neighbor, the idea of forgiveness, charity, and peace. How can that not be a guide to good behavior? Whether or not you accept the word of Christ isn’t the point I am trying to make. Again, I don’t care if you do or don’t. But you are rejecting all of the messages, the good ones because of the convolutedness (is that even a word?) of the Bible and some crappy messages. I agree that some of the stories in the Bible I think are historical bullshit, but the Bible wasn’t meant to be a historical document. It is a tool to help people guide their lives in a more righteous path. The Bible was written by many people over long periods of time, even long after the events took place. I recognize that. The message of goodness and love -not the hate which was a product of the time period it was written in, is what is important. What is wrong with promoting the idea to treat others good and justly? Nothing and hey, that is a common theme within society at large.
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People talk about the need for an open mind, I am not seeing that too much here. People’s faith, their ability to chose what they want to believe in is just as legitimate as the choice not to and is protected here in the US under the Constitution. Have and show a little tollerance towards someone that has faith and they might be just as willing to listen to you. Not necessarily accept, but just listen.
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As for fundamentalists…I can’t explain them. I’ve got friends that are and I tend to stay far away from talks about religion with them. It isn’t worth the headache. Of course if I am in a really bad mood and want to mess with them, I can always throw them with mentioning the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Heck, I might even do that the next time the Mormons or the Jehovah’s Witnesses come by….mwahhhh!!! This will beat me telling them that I worship satan….
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Ruler of The Seamonkeys,
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The tale of good Samaritan is actually a fantastic secular parable and of course meritous regardless of how much factual accuracy it does or doesn’t have. The Samaritan doesn’t appear to be motivated by a fear of God simply a glowing humanity.
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That doesn’t negate there’s a lot of stuff in the bible that is too often and too easily misinterpreted or just plain abused for vile purposes.
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The point remains that if people who don’t know better read it they at risk of picking up the wrong message and furthermore we see people doing just that all over the world.
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The Witnesses are a good example you’ve given.
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The bible has a few good bits and a lot of crud. Why don’t you try editing it a bit?
It contains two almost complete accounts of Jesus’s life. That is just dreadful editing.
Do the fundies think God forgot what he’d said and started again. Why are the accounts slightly different?
What it looks like is an a ecclectic collection of other documents in various styles from various social and political doctorines dragged together over time.
The historians assure me that is exactly what it is.
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We can agree at ‘a few good messages – read with care and not for the young or naive’.
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How about it?
I’m ranting against the urban myth that the bible is good moral guidance. The net balance is no. A couple of good ideas buried in something so long, tedious and badly written isn’t a book of good moral guidance.
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Most people would agree that we shouldn’t stone adulterers to death. But on the other hand that is the book that says we must in one part (Leviticus)! Later some bloke wriggles out of it – clearly breaking the law of God which shall ’shall surely be stoned to death’ not ‘unless you can think up some new clause and avoid it’. ’shall surely’ pretty imperitive to me.
How is that good moral guidance? It’s at least confusing and may teach people to cheat and engage in trickery.
PS: In Leviticus is says the man and the women should be stoned but in the parable they only mention her. Had they already done the man in or don’t we know?
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@ ۞
even in today’s society, if a wman cheats on her partner, or has many relationships in a short period of time, she is indeed considered a whore. she won’t be stoned to death, but will in most cases be looked down upon.
contrary to this, most males who have many relationships (cheating is usually still frowned upon), are considered champions. perhaps it was the same back then?
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And before I go, I’ve never had a good answer to this.
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Jesus was with out sin. Why didn’t he cast the first stone? It is the law of God.
Why does he get special pleading, or was he in that act changing the law of God?
If he was why doesn’t the book say so rather than this obscurist and discardable point about being without sin?
I’ve never committed adultery, should I cast the first stone?
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I’m not trying to be smart but the obscure and patchy way it is written leaves us with all sorts of question.
If you’re presenting a book about morality leaving us with all sorts of questions is not very good.
Particularly if it extends to the morality of whether mobs should stone people to death.
NB: All the atheists on this site will agree that you shouldn’t and they don’t need some stupid book to work that out.
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۞, i think even jesus was with sin.
he kind of smashed up the temple a bit.
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Blessed are the cheese makers…
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@Shits Cat
Freudian slip…subconscious statement of principle…nothing more…no identity crisis simply a typographical error…I’m not a mad pussy…
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Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm, typographical error, that what they all say :P Silly kitty :))))
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۞ writes “Most people would agree that we shouldn’t stone adulterers to death.”
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Well of course not. That’s just silly. Stones are hard to find on a ship. Walking the plank or keel hauling will have to do.
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OEJ
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a good tar and feathering will usually do also.
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@OEJ
“Most people would agree that we shouldn’t stone adulterers to death.”
I’ll take two sharp ones and a packet of gravel…
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@Ships Cat
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He’s not the Messiah. He’s a very naughty boy!
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@OEJ
I’m Brian and so is my wife…
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How about make them drink grog until they find Penelope Pimple beautiful then let the adulterer have sex with her. Take lots of pictures and put them on the fridge in the ship’s galley.
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Much better than stoning someone to death, that way they will pay for their sins for years and years when the Pirates and Wenches torment them with the evidence.
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Is it adultery if the significant other participates or has knowledge of the act?
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Why should a pirate care if the significant other is getting some on the side? Hell, a true pirate would see if they can get involved. Sexual promiscuity and fidelity are really separate things.
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@ Ships Cat – Hiya buddy!!!!
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@ Iron Bess – Now that would really be justice! I know a family that put a “passed out on the bathroom floor” photo of their teenaged son on the fridge.
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@ OEW – “Is it adultery if the significant other participates or has knowledge of the act?” – No. Nor is it cheating. Both adultery and cheating, IMO, imply lying or at least non-disclosure. That’s what makes it wrong from my perspective.
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Mmmmm – interesting point about adultery – but the xians would say yes because you can’t be married to more than one person.
Hi everyone!
Love the “revenge photo” idea *Booty puts that idea away for future reference* :)
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Hi Booty!!!!! How’s it going? I loved the revenge photo idea too! :)))
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Rowdiest – I agree with you that the root of the issue is the lie.
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fitting for the topic: HAPPPY HUP DAY!
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Sorry, i meant to say: HAPPY HUMP DAY
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@ OEW – I don’t know how it can be Hump Day again already, but it sure seems to be!
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hump day comes around whenever it wants to
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Rowdiest – your hubby must be happy about that.
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@ OEW – Hahahahahaha! Yep, he always is! :)))
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It’s a beautiful day in the neighbourhood, what do you all say about calling it a day and finding a small outdoor pub where we can all meet, drink grog and sing sea shanties in the sunshine?
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Wow that sounds good Bess! But I have to leave town to teach a riding lesson to a very depressed 13-year-old girl! I don’t have the energy for it today – dealing with some stuff myself. Oh well, I’ll be thinking of grog and sea shanties!
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Yeah, that sounds good, and y r u teaching a 13 year old depressed girl how to ride, and y’s she depressed?
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Where are you Bess?
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Well, I’m a professional horse back riding instructor and she’s one of my students. She opened up to me about being depressed and so I’m doing my best to help her.
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Where do I sign up for RW to ride me?
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Just thought I’d chime in, not to post anything intelligent at the moment, but just to get acquinted with my fellow Pastafarians.
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RAmen
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BCA, Get in line!
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Line starts at Oklahoma….
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You guys have very flimsy moral standards!
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Keep up the good work.
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Arrrgh!
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@ Sanchez – Welcome and RAmen!
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@ beastlt12 – Yes we do have flimsy moral standards! And we’re proud of it! RAmen! :)))
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@ BCA and ۞ – LMAO!!! Thanks guys! You know how to get on a wench’s good side!!! :))))))
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@Sanchez
Welcome to you as a new convert.
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Thanks guys and most loved wenches, I most definitely feel at home here…it’s like I have been born again ;)
RAmen
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Sanchez, I know what you mean! Stick around! It’s a great place to hang out.
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Hey, y r these comments still being used as a chat when we have a live chat up? Also, I personally love our low moral standards, y do u think pirating could be condoned without corruption of the church? Yey for pirates.
…I’m tired. c ya l8er
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Making up a religion and gathering false evidence….
Brainwashing children….
Tell me something, Anonymous. How many times have you been to church in your life? And how many times have you read The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, or visited invisiblepinkunicorn.com? You must ask yourself, who has really been brainwashed here?
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Yeah, hi Sanchez and welcome :)
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Logan – Chat is too time intensive for most of us here and forums are too slow (or moderated too much, have a power structure etc).
I imagine most folks have tried all three. We’re the ones that keep coming back here.
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Probably a personality thing :)
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Len Guini – truly and inspired name.
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@ Alchemist – yep, this format suits us quite well!
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@ Logan – the chat is fun but does not offer the opportunity for intellectual thought that this format does. And some of the insanity posted in the threads takes a while to type! :)))
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@Rowdiest Wench
“- the chat is fun but does not offer the opportunity for intellectual thought that this format does”…meow…meow…meow…
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Stop that right meow!
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RAmen
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@Logan
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“Hey, y r these comments still being used as a chat when we have a live chat up?”
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You really don’t expect a bunch of pirates and wenches to conform to someone else’s idea of what they should do, do you? Even though Bobby is the Prophet, he’s just another drunken pirate. Mind you, that’s not an insult. ,-)
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OEJ
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Being called a drunk pirate is a great complement to us.
@logan
we use these because often the people we want to talk to aren’t on the live chat when we are.
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Alright, u all have great points, I understand now. So umm… who exactly r the regulars here? Cause i think I know most of u, but I’m not sure I know all of u.
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We all be a punch of wenches, pirates and she-pirates. We drink grog, sing sea shanties and discuss the deeper meanings of the universe, while toasting to his holy appendages. Who be you?
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Give it time, Logan. If you stick it out, you will see who are regulars.
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Watch out for Iron Bess – her wit is sharper than her cutlass.
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Logan – If you mean which of the posters are regulars then I’m afraid that’s up to you to find out. Sorry mate- no post counts here. I just think of the regulars as folks who post a bit and hang around.
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If you mean who are we – IB has it there :) I suspect we’re, on average, a little older than a lot of groups. That’s because we drink a lot of booze and the consumption of alcohol is illegal for under 18s (insert appropriate age).
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Just ‘cos we’re pirates it doesn’t mean we condone breaking the law in any way. Well … :D
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yeh, but i’m an exception.
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@OEW – yeh and it’s just as dangerous as her flintlock pistols.
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“I suspect we’re, on average, a little older than a lot of groups. That’s because we drink a lot of booze…”
RAmen to that!
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we don’t drink just booze. we drink, rum, grog, and anything else that we can drink that has alcohal.
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Mmmm…rum, my favorite is Appleton Estate, it’s a Jamaican rum, smooth as Crown.
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RAmen
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And don’t forget all the beer. We have to drink a lot of beer to prepare ourselves for lapping up the beer vulcano in heaven!
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Personally I’m a dark Lamb’s 151 proof girl myself.
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My preference is Captain Morgan’s Private Reserve. Smooth and just a hint of vanilla.
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Good choice indeed. That would be my second favorite.
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wow posts come fast…
@IB I am a pirate, the guardian of the live chat (sorta), and one of the most devout Pastafarians around (not that u all aren’t devout). I haven’t seen u on the chats much, u should come by, there’s some good times to be had there. Anyway ye be the only wench that posts regularly that I haven’t met; may ye be granted with much grog.
Anyway i think my favorite ale, be a good glass of any kind of grog.
Also, just to start a new topic; I’m up for a challenge, anyone ask me anything about the FSM, I want to see how much theology i really know compared to all ye other pirates.
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I’m a lager man myself. So long as it’s more than 5% abv. anything less is cat’s piss! I like a decent Scotch too but tend to get completely shit-faced with spirits. I haven’t got the hand of that “moderation” thing yet.
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I had to look up ‘moderation’ in the dictionary a moment ago.
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@Alchemist – scotch…yech. (Picture me making growdy faces here. Rum and pepsi, now that is a nice drink o’ grog.
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@Logan – what are the rules surrounding other religions joining up with the CoFSM?
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@Sanchez – ‘moderation’ things that moderately taste like grog. A moderate amount of stripper watching is acceptable. Moderately off key while singing sea shanties is grounds for plank walking.
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HAHA!! — “But make up a religion and trying to find information to back it up is just sad.” What the hell do you think “christianity” is? M A D E U P ! ! !
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Yarrrrrrr….BUUUUURRRRRPPPPPPP
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@Iron Bess – LOL. I really need to touch up on my pirate talk!
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@ BCA – Did that echo off the neighbors’ houses? At my house, those are the only ones that count! :)))
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@ Ships Cat – FSM Dammit, missed you again!
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@ Sanchez – “I had to look up ‘moderation’ in the dictionary a moment ago.” Ahahahahahaha! Yep, you’ll fit right in around here! :))
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@ IB – How about being really off key? If that’s a plank walking offense, I’ll just avoid singing! :))
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@RW – absolutely not. Being really off-key is how all pirates and wenches are supposed to sing. We become very suspicious of those who can hold a tune!!! :)
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Ah Sanchez – moderation – such a subjective word :)
Do you have the phrase “everything in moderation”? I wonder if that applies to moderation? I can easily moderate my moderation. Do it without thinking most of the time.
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IB – you’ve got to watch your pepsi intake. That stuff will kill you!
(BTW – try a malt whisky – not the same as blends at all, especially price! Glenmorangie is nice. Don’t mix it though.)
That’s to you too Therese :))) IMHO get a decent malt and mix it with either water, ice or nothing. Get a cheap one at your peril.
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Now wine I always mix with something drinkable, like anti-freeze :))
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@ IB rules, we have rules? crap. Anyway if another religion really did want to join us the best way would probably be to talk to Bobby about it. I’ve never seen anything official surrounding it yet though.
And actually I’m underage for drinking. So of course I’ve never tried any sort of alcohol *shifty eyes*.
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@ Alchemist – “That’s to you too Therese :)))” Ahahahahahaha!! Was already there! Hubby came home with a very nice Kentucky Bourbon the other day just for the purpose of mixing with water. Not the cheap stuff! He’d agree with you about wine, BTW!!!
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@ IB – That’s a relief! Wench Beth may be in trouble though…she’ll have to learn to sing off key! :))
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I mix wine with mince and tomatoes in my pasta sauce.
RAmen.
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@ ۞ – Sounds wonderful!! RAmen!!
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In my day you’d all be flogged, hung and flogged some more; damn scallywags!
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Rowdy – Bourbon is not proper whiskey (forgot the e last time). It’s Rye. Sippin’ whiskey mayhap cowgirl, but not what I’d call whiskey ;P
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An Alchemist no less consorting with known blackhearts. In my day you’d be burned at the stake over a basket of live cats then thrown from London Bridge to drown thus proving your bedevilment; bounders the lot of you!
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wow, you just defined Christianity, well done!
x
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Matt. Indeed sir. Tis the sworn duty of every English nobleman to defend God, Queen and Country from villains and scoundrels such as these scurvy pastafarian jellyfish.
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@Commodore Horace T Swordfish Aug 2nd, 2007 at 3:31 pm
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A bounder sir? A bounder!
How dare you sir! It’s haddock at dawn for thee and me!
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Name your fish sir! I claim the Tiger Shark with the Elvis infatuation!
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@Alchemist
In this man’s navy we behave as gentleman sir. For Royal Navy men tis cannon at ten paces. Now retract your scandalous slight or face the searing kiss of hot cannon ball.
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I made no slight upon you sir! For it is you who are in the wrong!
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It is fish at dawn sir! Your perfidious protestations of propriety hold little sway with me.
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Choose thy fish!
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@Alchemist
It has not escaped my attention sir that your reference to both haddock and tiger shark are an underhanded attack on the noble name Swordfish.
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Swordfish men have served in the Royal Navy for 20 generations and I won’t have it sir! You sir are a rogue, a rascal and a rapscallion! No doubt you are also a drunkard and a womaniser!
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Now retract your vile slight or face the finest cannon duellist the Commonwealth has seen since Guy Falks.
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@ Alchemist – I obviously need to learn more about alcohol! :))) I’ve apparently never had proper whiskey. :(((
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@Alchemist
Egad man! Now you are corrupting young wenches into the evils of strong drink. Have you no shame? Cannon it is. Regulation 10B(1)(iii) of the Navy Code on Duelling, Fox Hunting and Other Manly Pursuits clearly states that as a common man, and a conjurer of devils, you must use the 10 inch wick. Obviously as an officer and a gentleman my wick shall be 5 inches. My second shall call upon your second in Hyde Park at sunrise. Good day sir.
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Good cod sir! You think I hold your name in jest? Are you fishing for trouble?
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Rowdy – truth is I’ll drink anything (booze wise). I’m not keen on rye whiskey (JD, Southern Comfort etc) I’ll drink it though :))
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An All-night Alliteration Attempt?
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@ Commodore – Alchemist has no corrupting to do! :) I don’t think he has any shame, and I don’t have much left either!!
@ Alchemist – Southern Comfort, also known as liquid panty remover! :)) We cook with it but I don’t drink it…
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@ BCA – Hi!! How’s it going today?
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@Commodore Horace T Swordfish Aug 2nd, 2007 at 3:10 pm
“In my day you’d all be flogged”
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How much (pounds?) do you think you would we get for us?
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Rowdy! :)
Fancy meeting you here ;p)
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@Commodore Horace T Swordfish Aug 2nd, 2007 at 4:58 pm
“you must use the 10 inch wick. Obviously as an officer and a gentleman my wick shall be 5 inches.”
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Doesn’t sound very big :p)
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@Rowdiest Wench
“I don’t think he has any shame, and I don’t have much left either!!”
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Despicable; women, like an albatross, have no place aboard ship or in taverns, unless they are serving tankards of ale to men folk. In my day you’d have been put over a gentleman’s knee and birched before being made to wear a scarlet symbol identifying you as a wench of ill repute.
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Sounds good Horace :))
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“you’d have been put over a gentleman’s knee and birched before being made to wear a scarlet symbol identifying you as a wench of ill repute.”
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Well that last bit anyway. :) But, try keeping the Wenches off the ship, or out of the taverns and you may find yourself wearing a few cast iron frying pans as decoration! ;)
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@ WN – Hiya! Had to take a shower…back for a few!
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@ Horace – I am also “Oh yeah try it bastard! Woman” so don’t mess with me! :)) I’d guess it sounds like your day is over…
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The men of the British Admiralty will not be cowed by the lusty antics of a handful of disgruntle tavern wenches. Even pirates are aware that having a woman, or an albatross, aboard ship is courting the wrath of Davy Jones himself and generally ill fortune will favour any vessel harbouring wenches.
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I don’t think this group of pirates will sail without their wenches!
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“I don’t think this group of pirates will sail without their wenches!”
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Frying pans if they even try :p)
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That’s right! But I think they know better! :)))
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@Commodore Horace T Swordfish
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You know some fishermen are *still* superstitious about having a women on board! I was in a little fishing town in OZ and wanted to go out on one of the trips on any one of the commercial fishing trawlers. Most weren’t at all keen. Not health and safety reasons (probably would be nowadays) given for negative attitudes towards the idea from the skippers….was the women on board thing! True story!
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Besides Commodore Swordfish hasn’t seen our Wenchy outfits! :))
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Sensible folk are fisher folk. It’s also wise to keep your monocle peeled for witches.
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@Commodore Horace T Swordfish
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If in your day you didn’t have wenches drinking with you, then were all the men hitting on each other??? That’s pretty sick if you ask me. No really, I don’t get it, so you just sat around circle jerking with all your mates? I bet you’re one handed typing as I’m writing this…nasty. Screw your day, I’ll take mine and my wenches that will most definitely be drinking WITH me, not serving me!
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@Rowdiest Wench
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Remind me to go get some SoCo tomorrow.
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Commodore Horace T Swordfish Aug 2nd, 2007 at 7:26 pm
“It’s also wise to keep your monocle peeled for witches.”
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Just keep a monocled eye out for their cats Horace. :))
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May I inquire which of your parents disliked you enough to name you Horace Swordfish? :p)
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You speak like caveman.
You have brain of caveman too?
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Wench Nikkiee Aug 2nd, 2007 at 7:35 pm
“Just keep a monocled eye out for their cats Horace”
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And big cooking pots…..
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@ Sanchez – “Remind me to go get some SoCo tomorrow.” Ahahahahaha!!! Will do! :))
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@Dirty Sanchez
You sir are a cad. I’ll have you kissin’ the gunners daughter within a heartbeat for your impudence once we catch your carcass upon the high seas. Admiral Hornblower and the men of the British Admiralty are staunchly heterosexual and we tolerate no shenanigans aboard ship.
@Willy D
You must be the cabin boy. Run along lad; the men folk are trading “broad sides” and you’d best stay back with the wenches where it’s safe.
@The Wenches
The milk in my earl grey has soured proving conclusively that you are witches. You shall be burned at the stake until proven guilty once captured.
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I’m not sure what you just called me… “I haven’t understood a word you’ve said since you’ve walked through that door.”
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“The milk in my earl grey has soured proving conclusively that you are witches.”
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Is that all? Nothing has fallen off yet?
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Must order some fresh Dinosaur scales for next brew!
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Oh Bugga! Now witches.com is all out of fresh cat’s claws!
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@Wench Nikkiee
“Must order some fresh Dinosaur scales for next brew!”
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Heresy! God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Godzilla.
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“Is that all? Nothing has fallen off yet?”
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Here at the British Admiralty nothing “falls off”. My word if a good birching wouldn’t set you straight.
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@ WN – I checked on eye of newt and dried deadly nightshade…no luck there either! We need a better supplier! I’m very disappointed…
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Arr….it be a Holy Friday afternoon in this magical land of OZ and this Wench be off to yonder tavern to taste of its liquid delights. I shall deal with thee later Horace T Swordfish! I suggest in the meantime you pray solemnly to your imaginary god! :))
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Rowdiest
Bummer!! Will have to get onto it stat!
I’ll have to leave you to the fantasies of Commodore Horace now. Careful though….I think he may have a little bit of a spanking fetish. :p)
Catch you later :))
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Possibly whipping!
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@ WN – Spanking’s OK! Whipping not so good! :)) Have fun! I’ll see what I can find for his tea…
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The British Admiralty, and indeed the Empire, was made great by steady, well bred, English gentleman with the good book in one hand and a stout length of birch in the other.
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Yep – and look what you have now! So much for birch! I daresay the wenches around here prefer to be flogged with stiffer wood than that anyway.
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Looking for a riding crop are we, Rowdiest?
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@ OEW – Ahahahahahaha!!! :)))))
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Sounds like you found it! Would you like another with a little more stiffness to it?
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@ OEW – I think experimentation is best! More stiffness should be good, but the important thing is to keep trying! :)))
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at the commodore
does ‘well bred’ in Engalnd have anything to do with ‘keeping it in the family’, may i inquire?
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by the way, i did mean England, shut up about my spelling.
while i’m at it commodore,
nothing falling off? i’m surethere was, leprosy was rife among you filthy english sea dogs, but your fickle diseases will prove to be nothing compared to the wrath of the wenches!
and i’m sure you were heterosexual, so when you say “come on, let’s get naked and you get on my back”, it’s not gay, just two sailors missing their wives?
well guess what commodore, i’ll bet your wench, if indeed you have one, is lucky to be around the drunken pirates in the tavern rather than one who’s parents were so closely related!
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@angryyoungaytheist
I don’t know what goes on in Engalnd son but in England there’s no rogering the little sister, fondling the cousin or screwing the pooch. “Well bred” denotes the proficient manner in which the breeding is accomplished and the fine stock produced. I think you need a birching
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All hail the Mighty Flying Spaghetti Monster!!!! ARGH! (pirate voice)
I love the concept of this and how it shows how stupid a religion really is. As somebody who was raised without a religion and never set a foot in a church in my hole life I actually feel like becoming a member of the CotFSM.
Classic!
Thank you for great site!
Greeting from the Netherlands
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Hoi Mathijn, welkom bij de kerk. Er meer Nederlandse piraten ook op deze sit.
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@Rowdiest – There are a couple of experiments that I would like to try out. How is the back?
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Good noodley morning and happy Holy Friday to all wenches, pirates and she-pirates alike. Let’s all have a swig or two to celebrate the day. I’m off to sing a sea shanty while finishing up the budget.
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Somebody say stiffer wood? “Excuse me while I whip this out”
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@Mathijn – hey how in all that is holy and beer-like did you ever manage to go your entire life without that indoctrination of church and religion. I have to say, I am just a tad bit jealous. Welkommen to the CoFSM and may his noodley appendages tickle you with their warmth.
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@OEW – you be sounding like you are coveting someone else’s wench there matey. Drink some grog and go watch some strippers afore someone runs a cutlass across your britches!
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@Sanchez – whoa there boy. No pulling out the stiffer wood.
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@Logan – if you are still around, read the Gospel of the FSM and it will tell you that the CoFSM accepts all religions and even has a 30 day trial period. I thought you said that you were up on all of our practices?
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@ OEW – The back’s fine! :)) LOL!!! Laughing is a good way to start the day! :))
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@ IB – Happy Friday to you! :) Question – what is the difference between a wench and a she-pirate? You are the first of us to be a she-pirate so I’m uncertain! :)
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@ Sanchez – You said to remind you to buy some SoCo today, so – buy some SoCo today! :))))
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@ Mathijn – Welcome and RAmen!!
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@ RW, let the panty droppin begin! Great start to our Holy Holiday!
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RAmen to all
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On a side note, I had pasta last night in preparation for our Holy Holiday. I even saved half of it for today.
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Iron Bess – Thansk for the advice. I did not know that you and Rowdiest were a couple. Cool.
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Happy Friday to you Iron Bess and all others.
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Ummm… You’re raised Christian? The Christian faith was “made up” by people who “tried to find information to back it up.” The major difference is they did a much worse job than the prophet Bobby has. The best evidence the Christian’s can come up with is “it says so in the Bible.” If that was all the assurance our prophet Mr. Henderson gave us — “Just read it in my book and you’ll know it’s true” — he would be ridiculed and have garnered no respect in the scientific community. But Mr. Henderson has given us extensive evidence that suggests, if not proves, the FSM’s existence. None of us were “raised” in the tradition of FSM, none of us were told while growing up that we’d better believe this or there’d be hell to pay. We came to these conclusions on our own, without being “brainwashed” as you so elegantly put it. You’re fourteen years old. Your mind is still young and developing. I plead to you, before they brainwash you entirely, GET OUT! You, my friend, are stuck in a fake religion! I do not ask of you to convert to our faith, only to free your mind and look at the subject with your own eyes! Not your parents’ eyes, because chances are they’ve never used theirs either, they relied on *their* parent’s word that if they don’t accept the religion they’re given they’ll rot in hell for eternity. It’s a pretty scary thought, rotting in hell for all eternity, so I could see why it would scare you into blindly accepting the alternative. I urge you — think for yourself! God, The FSM, Allah, Brahma, whoever… they gave you a brain for a reason! Use it and come to your own conclusions, whatever they be!
Ramen
~Shaggy
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I’m telling you, those people who wrote the Bible were geniuses. They were able to scare the living shit out of people with just two words, faith and hell. If you didn’t have faith, you will go to hell…plain as that. In fact, that should have been their entire Bible, just that one sentence. I can see how back in the day that could scare some people into being a believer, but come on people, free your mind and make your own decisions on what to believe…
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RAmen
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@ OEW – “I did not know that you and Rowdiest were a couple. Cool.” Ahahahahahahaha!!!! Hilarious! :)) Hubby has said for years that I’d be perfect if I just had a girlfriend! :))
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@ Sanchez – Should be a good day! :))
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@ Shaggy – Welcome and RAmen!
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@ OEW – oh but aren’t you just the funniest guy today. As much as RW is a girl after my own heart I only be bedding one Pirate and he be a big ‘un. And before your black hearted imagination runs wild on that one…he is six four.
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@ Sanchez – actually I also think they managed to scare people in those days by suggesting that if they did not believe they might regret it by losing all of their money and being tortured a tiny bit and then killed in some fun and fanciful fashion.
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@ Shaggy – too bad you weren’t around a few days back, we had some pretty serious discussions going with some xtian types some of which were fundies disguised as open minded people. Welcome to the Fun House, happy Holy Friday and RAmen to you.
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Rowdiest – That is what all husbands think about their wives.
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Iron Bess – I am just sleep deprived. I know that you understand the 14 hour day. your significant other is six four? Good for him. Makes it difficult to get through tiny door ways on a boat though. Good for deck fighting but not for inside fights on the boat.
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Shaggy – welcome. It is fun and will make you wonder how some people can get dressed in the morning.
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IB – “…and he be a big ‘un. And before your black hearted imagination runs wild on that one…he is six four.”
Is that 6′4″ or 6 4/12″ :D
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@ OEW – That does seem to be consistent! :)))
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@ Alchemist – Reliable as always to “misinterpret” what people say! :))) Love it! :))
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@shaggy. agree with you 150%.
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@OEW- who says we get dreesed in the morning. Since it’s the summer i don’t even wake up till 11:00 am.
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@ Alchemist – I said a big ‘un, not a tiny one. You figure it out. :)
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@ OEW – why for are you sleep deprived? That makes for a cranky Pirate.
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So great news, I have the whole long weekend off! I will be doing some serious sleeping in!
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@ IB – Wee hee! Sleeping in is good for the soul! :))
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I am sleep dreprived because of going on day 5 of 14 hour days. Not fun, but keeps a pirate in rum.
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Sleep takes away from drinking time, so does work. :( I have to find me a rich she-pirate to pay for what she could get for free, so I can work at home. ;)
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TFSMIF
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Happy holy day to everyone!
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RAmen.
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yes i hope you all at least are wearing a eyepatch while going about your normal bueisness on this holy friday.
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@ OEW – I hear ya brother, if I could find me a rich Pirate, well than I’d have two and I wouldn’t have to keep working.
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@ LOTPF & beast – unfortunately my eye patch is at the cleaners so I am wearing my bra cock eyed over my head.
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IB – Now how am I supposed to focus on work? :)
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IB-Wow, yeah, that’s really quite the mental image
Anyway grog for everyone this holiest of days!!!
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btw I hope I’m not confusing anyone with my new name, I’m Logan just to clairafy that. Anyway how will ye all be spending ur Friday?
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I’m confused, but only because my mind is single tracked on all the rum I will be drinking starting in two hours.
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RAmen
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@ Logan – We are used to random name changes! Not a problem!!
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@ IB – Fantastic eye patch solution! :))
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@ everyone – gone for the weekend. Catch up with you later!
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I live in Vegas, so I think I’ll spend all weekend walking the strip and yelling “Aaarrrrrgh!” randomly at tourists.
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Hehehehehe
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Various Deities Still Sorting Through Victims Of Tragic Queens Bus Accident
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/various_deities_still_sorting
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I’d object to this if it weren’t for the Fifth “I’d really rather you didn’t”:
“I’d really rather you didn’t challenge the bigoted, misogynistic, hateful ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, then go after the b*******.”
I will go get some food, then challenge your bigoted, misogynistic, hateful ideas.
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Well, it certainly got her attention, now didn’t it?
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Hi. This is my first post. I am currently taking a class on Monotheistic Religion (it’s hell…I mean a requirement to graduate). It’s is suppose to be a study of religion, but as it turns out the teacher is a religious fanatic, who offers nothing to the academic community or to me. Anyway after she told me I was close-minded, was going to burn in hell, and my interpretation of the Christian Bible was wrong and unimportant, my sister mentioned The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster to me. I researched it and I am hooked.
Moving on. I would like to pointed out that Christians have no right to accuse others of brainwashing. They baptise kids at approx. 6 months and make them fully commit to the church at 14. Why not wait until people are old enough to make intelligent, responsible desicions on their own?
Lastly, Christians are so quick to label people as immoral and what not, yet the Southern Christian Leadership Conference is honoring Michael Vick for Outstanding Leadership ( I know they are mostly a civil rights org, and I am all for civil rights, but they still are affiliated with Christianity ). In my eyes that means that Christians think we should all start illegally carrying guns and abusing animals. Good one…
Capt. W
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Sorry… and by “hell” I mean Michigan, not Norway
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@ Captain W – Welcome and RAmen! I hope you can stay a while and enjoy the hilarity, insanity and sometimes useful discussions!!
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